20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity 1 at Lunch Time Sit in Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point a Hair Dryer at Passing Cars See if They Slow Down 2 Five Days in Advance Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not in the Mood 3 Every Time Someone Asks You to Do Something Ask if They Want Fries With That 4 Put Your Garbage Can on Your Desk and Label It in 5 Put Decaf in the Coffee Maker for 3 Weeks Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions Switch to Espresso 6 in the Memo Field of All Your Checks Write for Smuggling Diamonds 7 Finish All Your Sentences With in Accordance With the Prophecy 8 Don't Use Any Punctuation as Often as Possible Skip Rather Than Walk 9 10 Order a Diet Water Whenever You Go to Eat With a Serious Face Out Specify That Your Drive-Through Order Is to Go 11 12 Sing Along at the Opera 13 Go to a Poetry Recital and Ask Why the Poems Don't Rhyme? 14 Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play Tropical Sounds All Day Page Yourself Over the Intercom Don't Disguise Your Voice 15 16 Have Your Co-Workers Address You by Your Wrestling Name Rock Bottom 17 When the Money Comes Out the ATM Scream I Won! I Won! When Leaving the Zoo Start Running Towards the Parking Lot Yelling Run for Your Lives! They're Loose! 18 19 Tell Your Children Over Dinner Due to the Economy We Are Going to Have to Let One of You Go 20 Suck in Some Helium From a Balloon Walk Behind Someone and Say Follow the Yellow Brick Road