432 You Got Two Bullets You're in a Room With Hitler Bill Cosby Cardi B a Massive Spider and Stuart Little Who You Shooting? Wednesday 1131 Pm Bill and Hitler Surely That's the Only Reasonable Answer Wednesday 1149 Pm Actually No! The Correct Answer Is to Shoot Stuart Twice butI Admire Your Conviction Today 140 Am Can I Get an Explanation for That One Pls Sir Today 211 Am Sure Can Imagine This You Are Four Years Old and You've Got a Mother and Father Who Love You Very Much Your Days Are Filled With Fun and Kindness as Your Loving Parents Try to Nurture You in the Most Pleasant Environment Possible One Day You Awaken One to the Smell of Smoke Night You Open Your Eyes and Begin to Choke You Try to Find Your Parents but You Can't Get Past the Toddler-Proof Gate in the Doorway You Lie Down and Scream Unable to Accept Your Impending Doom That's When Your Father Rushes in to Collect You You Cling Onto Him for Your Dear Life as He Takes You Outside and Places You on the Grass I HAVE TO GO GET MUMMY! He Bravely Runs Back Inside but Alas That's the Last You Ever See of Him You Escape the Ordeal With Minor Scarring but It's Nothing in Comparison to the Heartbreak You Felt That Night You Have No Grandparents No Aunties or Uncles No Guardians Whatsoever and as a Result Are Forced to Live in an Orphanage Day Weeks Months Years Go by and as You Watch All the Other Orphans Leave With Their New Foster Parents You're Hopes of Having a Happy Life Diminish More and More One Day a Young Couple Come in They Remind You Much of Your Parents Except They've Already Got a Biological Son but That's Okay You Try Extra Hard to Make an Impression on This Family as This May Be Your Last Chance at Living a Fulfilled Childhood When the Time Has Come for Them to Formally Tell the Orphanage Matron Which Child They Are Going to Adopt You Eagerly Await Your Name to Be Announced That's When They Adopt a FUCKING RAT INSTEAD OF YOU This Destroys Your Morale You Give Up You Run Away From the Orphanage Get Raised by the Streets as a Petty Pickpocket You'll Never Remember What True Happiness Is I'll Never Forget What Stuart Little Took From Me Today 417 Am Can I Change My Answer Be My Guest Me So I Never Have to Think About That Again That's the Spirit Next Time I Can Tell You About the Time Shrek Cyberbullied Me if You Want Sent Type a Message GIF Why I Hate Stuart Little