74 Memes found for meth mouth

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Confused, Doctor, and Drugs: Neuroscientist Explains: Meth And ADHD Drug Adderall Are Almost Identical! JUNE 23, 2017 AT 5:08 PM Counter Current News CCN msnbc ITH CHRIS HAYES din.■ CARL HART ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY @Freedom Faction Repost @freedom_faction ・・・ Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat well with me and now this information from an esteemed Neuroscientist leaves me feeling even more confused over the idea. ColumbiaUniversity psychiatry professor Dr.CarlHart. wrote a piece on Vice, partnered with the Influence detailing his experimental use of both Meth and his research into the topic. However the article isn’t quite what you think. We’ve all seen the reported effects of Meth and we have all judged meth-heads but according to this doctor there is much more too it. He isn’t advocating taking meth of ADHD drugs at all BUT he is saying we should be aware of what it is, it’s a very interesting read. Perhaps it has something to do with public “educational” campaigns aimed at discouraging methamphetamine use. These campaigns usually show, in graphic and horrifying detail, some poor young person who uses the drug for the first time and then ends up engaging in uncharacteristic acts such as prostitution, stealing from parents, or assaulting strangers for money to buy the drug. At the end of the advertisement, emblazoned on the screen, is: “Meth—not even once.” We’ve also seen those infamous “meth mouth” images (extreme tooth decay), wrongly presented as a direct consequence of methamphetamine use. These types of media campaigns neither prevent nor decrease the use of the drug; nor do they provide any real facts about the effects of meth. They succeed only in perpetuating false assumptions. Swayed by this messaging, the public remains almost entirely ignorant of the fact that methamphetamine produces nearly identical effects to those produced by the popular ADHD medication d-amphetamine (dextroamphetamine). You probably know it as Adderall®: a combination of amphetamine and d-amphetamine mixed salts. Yeah, I know. This statement requires some defense. 🖐🏾More in comments👇🏾 WarOnDrugs WarOnConsciousness
Confused, Doctor, and Drugs: Neuroscientist Explains: Meth And
 ADHD Drug Adderall Are Almost
 Identical!
 JUNE 23, 2017 AT 5:08 PM
 Counter Current News CCN
 msnbc
 ITH CHRIS HAYES
 din.■ CARL HART
 ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY
 @Freedom Faction
Repost @freedom_faction ・・・ Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat well with me and now this information from an esteemed Neuroscientist leaves me feeling even more confused over the idea. ColumbiaUniversity psychiatry professor Dr.CarlHart. wrote a piece on Vice, partnered with the Influence detailing his experimental use of both Meth and his research into the topic. However the article isn’t quite what you think. We’ve all seen the reported effects of Meth and we have all judged meth-heads but according to this doctor there is much more too it. He isn’t advocating taking meth of ADHD drugs at all BUT he is saying we should be aware of what it is, it’s a very interesting read. Perhaps it has something to do with public “educational” campaigns aimed at discouraging methamphetamine use. These campaigns usually show, in graphic and horrifying detail, some poor young person who uses the drug for the first time and then ends up engaging in uncharacteristic acts such as prostitution, stealing from parents, or assaulting strangers for money to buy the drug. At the end of the advertisement, emblazoned on the screen, is: “Meth—not even once.” We’ve also seen those infamous “meth mouth” images (extreme tooth decay), wrongly presented as a direct consequence of methamphetamine use. These types of media campaigns neither prevent nor decrease the use of the drug; nor do they provide any real facts about the effects of meth. They succeed only in perpetuating false assumptions. Swayed by this messaging, the public remains almost entirely ignorant of the fact that methamphetamine produces nearly identical effects to those produced by the popular ADHD medication d-amphetamine (dextroamphetamine). You probably know it as Adderall®: a combination of amphetamine and d-amphetamine mixed salts. Yeah, I know. This statement requires some defense. 🖐🏾More in comments👇🏾 WarOnDrugs WarOnConsciousness

Repost @freedom_faction ・・・ Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat wel...

Confused, Doctor, and Drugs: Neuroscientist Explains: Meth And ADHD Drug Adderall Are Almost Identical! JUNE 23, 2017 AT 5:08 PM Counter Current News CCN ALL IN WITH CHRIS HAYES 九msnbc.com WITH CHRIS HAYES CARL HART ■ ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY @Freedom Factio Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat well with me and now this information from an esteemed Neuroscientist leaves me feeling even more confused over the idea. ColumbiaUniversity psychiatry professor Dr.CarlHart. wrote a piece on Vice, partnered with the Influence detailing his experimental use of both Meth and his research into the topic. However the article isn’t quite what you think. We’ve all seen the reported effects of Meth and we have all judged meth-heads but according to this doctor there is much more too it. He isn’t advocating taking meth of ADHD drugs at all BUT he is saying we should be aware of what it is, it’s a very interesting read. Perhaps it has something to do with public “educational” campaigns aimed at discouraging methamphetamine use. These campaigns usually show, in graphic and horrifying detail, some poor young person who uses the drug for the first time and then ends up engaging in uncharacteristic acts such as prostitution, stealing from parents, or assaulting strangers for money to buy the drug. At the end of the advertisement, emblazoned on the screen, is: “Meth—not even once.” We’ve also seen those infamous “meth mouth” images (extreme tooth decay), wrongly presented as a direct consequence of methamphetamine use. These types of media campaigns neither prevent nor decrease the use of the drug; nor do they provide any real facts about the effects of meth. They succeed only in perpetuating false assumptions. Swayed by this messaging, the public remains almost entirely ignorant of the fact that methamphetamine produces nearly identical effects to those produced by the popular ADHD medication d-amphetamine (dextroamphetamine). You probably know it as Adderall®: a combination of amphetamine and d-amphetamine mixed salts. Yeah, I know. This statement requires some defense. 🖐🏾More in comments👇🏾 WarOnDrugs WarOnConsciousness
Confused, Doctor, and Drugs: Neuroscientist Explains: Meth And
 ADHD Drug Adderall Are Almost
 Identical!
 JUNE 23, 2017 AT 5:08 PM
 Counter Current News
 CCN
 ALL IN WITH CHRIS HAYES
 九msnbc.com
 WITH CHRIS HAYES
 CARL HART
 ■ ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY
 @Freedom Factio
Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat well with me and now this information from an esteemed Neuroscientist leaves me feeling even more confused over the idea. ColumbiaUniversity psychiatry professor Dr.CarlHart. wrote a piece on Vice, partnered with the Influence detailing his experimental use of both Meth and his research into the topic. However the article isn’t quite what you think. We’ve all seen the reported effects of Meth and we have all judged meth-heads but according to this doctor there is much more too it. He isn’t advocating taking meth of ADHD drugs at all BUT he is saying we should be aware of what it is, it’s a very interesting read. Perhaps it has something to do with public “educational” campaigns aimed at discouraging methamphetamine use. These campaigns usually show, in graphic and horrifying detail, some poor young person who uses the drug for the first time and then ends up engaging in uncharacteristic acts such as prostitution, stealing from parents, or assaulting strangers for money to buy the drug. At the end of the advertisement, emblazoned on the screen, is: “Meth—not even once.” We’ve also seen those infamous “meth mouth” images (extreme tooth decay), wrongly presented as a direct consequence of methamphetamine use. These types of media campaigns neither prevent nor decrease the use of the drug; nor do they provide any real facts about the effects of meth. They succeed only in perpetuating false assumptions. Swayed by this messaging, the public remains almost entirely ignorant of the fact that methamphetamine produces nearly identical effects to those produced by the popular ADHD medication d-amphetamine (dextroamphetamine). You probably know it as Adderall®: a combination of amphetamine and d-amphetamine mixed salts. Yeah, I know. This statement requires some defense. 🖐🏾More in comments👇🏾 WarOnDrugs WarOnConsciousness

Thoughts? The over use of drugs to treat kids problems in the USA (and growing the world over) has never sat well with me and now this infor...

Advice, Bodies , and Doe: How to keep up your health and sanity, while using meth 1) Take care of your teeth. Get mouth sores checked out. See a dentist regularly. Rinse your mouth out after every smoke sesh. 2) Stay hydrated. Every .1 you smoke, you need to drink at least 6 large glasses of water. Drink gatorade and powerade to replenish your electrolytes. 3) Make sure you're getting all your vitamins and eat as much protein as you can. If you can't eat, drink protein shakes or eat soup (best of both liquid and food, makes it easy going down) 4) Try and sleep every night, but if you can't, lay down with your eyes closed in the dark and rest for as long as possible. Your body needs rest, and so does your mind. 5) Keep your skin in good condition. Do not pick at your face, most importantly. That is the most noticeable spot, and it will cause nasty scars and marks after Try and keep your hands off your skin at all times. 6) Keep good hygiene. Shower every day, and make sure you don't smell like meth. It's gross. 7) Keep going to work, and having a social life. Plan out your paychecks accordingly. Never go over your dope budget, and dip into rent money or food money. You will regret it. 8) Most importantly, be secretive about who knows. That shit does not need to be out there for the world to know. Stay safe guys. #meth #amphetamine #methamphetamine #health #careful #know your limits 21 notes I mean, it's solid advice, but... Seriously?
Advice, Bodies , and Doe: How to keep up your health and
 sanity, while using meth
 1) Take care of your teeth. Get mouth sores checked out. See a dentist
 regularly. Rinse your mouth out after every smoke sesh.
 2) Stay hydrated. Every .1 you smoke, you need to drink at least 6 large
 glasses of water. Drink gatorade and powerade to replenish your electrolytes.
 3) Make sure you're getting all your vitamins and eat as much protein as you
 can. If you can't eat, drink protein shakes or eat soup (best of both liquid and
 food, makes it easy going down)
 4) Try and sleep every night, but if you can't, lay down with your eyes closed in
 the dark and rest for as long as possible. Your body needs rest, and so does
 your mind.
 5) Keep your skin in good condition. Do not pick at your face, most importantly.
 That is the most noticeable spot, and it will cause nasty scars and marks after
 Try and keep your hands off your skin at all times.
 6) Keep good hygiene. Shower every day, and make sure you don't smell like
 meth. It's gross.
 7) Keep going to work, and having a social life. Plan out your paychecks
 accordingly. Never go over your dope budget, and dip into rent money or food
 money. You will regret it.
 8) Most importantly, be secretive about who knows. That shit does not need to
 be out there for the world to know.
 Stay safe guys.
 #meth #amphetamine #methamphetamine #health #careful #know your limits
 21 notes
I mean, it's solid advice, but... Seriously?

I mean, it's solid advice, but... Seriously?

Beef, Beef, and Fam: Faraha 55 mins. u keep fucking with me if uwant too im make sure u Savanna gonna be put too sleep before yo time so whoever see this or see that bitch tell her im here waiting ain't gonna move im drag your meth mouth all the way down so u better call your mama and daddy too buried yo assu fucking with the wrong babymama today Like Comment A Share Faraha and 4 others Eliott Farm she still talking smmth Like Reply 54 mins Faraha Yes Eliot calling my phone fam she got me fuck up playing with the wrong one Like Reply O1 51 mins Eliott You need to go ahead 8 beat her ass like she stole something Like Reply O1.49 mins Dollie Man gone slide tha trick she doing to much Like Reply 1.46 mins Eliott Right Dol She been harassing my fam Fara or weeks now Like Reply -O1.44 mins Dollie Ok cause ain't no bitch or nigga gone keep coming at me and not get popped Like Reply 37 mins Faraha l she got me fuck all the way up Like Reply .O 1.34 mins ell ha gone catch her round Doll Like Reply 34 mins Dollie U bet not be fighting over a nigga. Fuck a nigga but respect goes along way frfr Like Reply O1-33 mins Dollie fr fr that hoe doing too much Faraha Like Reply 43 mins Tee Do what u gotta do Like Reply 42 mins Tee Wya? Like Reply 42 mins Farah im at the crib waiting on this hoe Like Reply 40 mins NOT Gon do shit ul Farahan Like Reply 38 mins Jeff Slide that meth mouth hoe sis Like Reply 37 mins Faraha Luul that hoe keep coming for me Like Reply .37 mins I will Jeff Faraha bro she want that ass beat today Like Reply 36 mins Luu Gul I wanna see this shit record it Like Reply 01.33 mins Tee U n dallas? Or here Like Reply 32 mins Tee Call me finna inbox u Like Reply 32 mins Luu Savanna Like Reply 30 mins Eric Cuz slap fire from dat Bitch Like Reply 25 mins Someone is typing a comment... This is a daily occurrence for her, good ole country beef
Beef, Beef, and Fam: Faraha
 55 mins.
 u keep fucking with me if uwant too im make sure u
 Savanna
 gonna be put too sleep before yo time so whoever see this or see that
 bitch tell her im here waiting ain't gonna move im drag your meth mouth all
 the way down so u better call your mama and daddy too buried yo assu
 fucking with the wrong babymama today
 Like Comment
 A Share
 Faraha
 and 4 others
 Eliott
 Farm she still talking
 smmth
 Like Reply 54 mins
 Faraha
 Yes Eliot
 calling my phone fam she got
 me fuck up playing with the wrong one
 Like Reply O1 51 mins
 Eliott
 You need to go ahead 8 beat her ass like she stole
 something
 Like Reply O1.49 mins
 Dollie
 Man gone slide tha trick she doing to much
 Like Reply 1.46 mins
 Eliott
 Right Dol
 She been harassing my
 fam Fara
 or weeks now
 Like Reply -O1.44 mins
 Dollie
 Ok cause ain't no bitch or nigga gone keep
 coming at me and not get popped
 Like Reply 37 mins
 Faraha
 l she got me fuck all the
 way up
 Like Reply .O 1.34 mins
 ell ha gone catch her round
 Doll
 Like Reply 34 mins
 Dollie
 U bet not be fighting over a nigga. Fuck a
 nigga but respect goes along way frfr
 Like Reply O1-33 mins

 Dollie fr fr that hoe doing too much
 Faraha
 Like Reply 43 mins
 Tee
 Do what u gotta do
 Like Reply 42 mins
 Tee
 Wya?
 Like Reply 42 mins
 Farah
 im at the crib waiting on this hoe
 Like Reply 40 mins
 NOT Gon do shit
 ul Farahan
 Like Reply 38 mins
 Jeff
 Slide that meth mouth hoe sis
 Like Reply 37 mins
 Faraha
 Luul
 that hoe keep coming for me
 Like Reply .37 mins
 I will Jeff
 Faraha
 bro she want that ass beat today
 Like Reply
 36 mins
 Luu
 Gul I wanna see this shit record it
 Like Reply 01.33 mins
 Tee
 U n dallas? Or here
 Like Reply 32 mins
 Tee
 Call me finna inbox u
 Like Reply 32 mins
 Luu
 Savanna
 Like Reply
 30 mins
 Eric
 Cuz slap fire from dat Bitch
 Like Reply 25 mins
 Someone is typing a comment...
This is a daily occurrence for her, good ole country beef

This is a daily occurrence for her, good ole country beef

Crazy, Drugs, and Food: htownsrealest IT'S REALLY SAD THAT PPL ASSUME THE WORST OF SOMEONE THEY WOULDN'T EVEN SURVIVE AN HOUR IN THEIR SHOES... THIS IS VERY REAL! GO TO MY PAGE I HAVE MANY VIDEOS TO SHOW AND PROVE. BUT JUST FOR THE CLARIFICATION OF THE SMALL MINDED AND MINI TESTICULAR FORTITUDE INDIVIDUALS. I HAVE 2 DEGREES 1 FROM HOWARD UNIVERSITY IN WASH DC.THE OTHER FROM LAMAR UNIVERSITY IN BEAUMONT, TX (WHICH STILL DOESN'T HAVE POWER AND WATER) I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE NOR MY MULTI DEGREED PARENTS LIFE CONSUMED DRUGS SUCH AS CRACK, HEROIN, METH, KUSH, ETC HOWEVER THE FEW EXPERTS SPEAKING ON SUCH MUST KNOW MORE ABOUT IT THAN SAY THAT TO SAY THIS DO YOUR RESEARCH! GO TO MY PAGE. SCROLL DOWN. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. I'M JUST WILLING TO SPEAK OUT! WITH THAT SAID THANK YOU TO ALL THAT SUPPORT US AND A MILLION ROUNDS OF FUs TO THOSE THAT DON'T #ICANTMAKETHISUP IS THE TAG d▼V @THESHADEROOM THANKS FOR THE VIEVW This post is for your peasants @ryanharris100 @bishhop_5 @martinn6582 @niick187 @alicia_mz14 @ajdomin34 that were on my post yesterday disrespecting this woman while she was OBVIOUSLY going through a tough time. You people have no civility or self respect. You don't have the common sense to know that even if you don't agree with someone, you don't HAVE to be disrespectful. You can state your opinions in a respectful manner and not be complete assholes. It's very possible. Her comment on this post, is for you recessive, troll ass, crakkka cub, wendigo weirdo, neanderthal, pink, peckerwood, caucasoid, mayo ass peasants. Watch your fucking mouth! It's always some pale pasty ice bitch ass caveman-cavewoman talking reckless from behind a private page smh lol all of you are sad as fuck. Via @htownsrealest @papatututyru @ig_immortal HendrixBrown picoftheday photooftheday instagram repost tb throwback hiphop mood instagood love wow crazy home Houston Htown HTX diy hurricaneharvey health texas live life harvey help Melanin news redcross food icantmakethisup
Crazy, Drugs, and Food: htownsrealest IT'S REALLY SAD THAT PPL
 ASSUME THE WORST OF SOMEONE THEY
 WOULDN'T EVEN SURVIVE AN HOUR IN THEIR
 SHOES... THIS IS VERY REAL! GO TO MY PAGE
 I HAVE MANY VIDEOS TO SHOW AND PROVE.
 BUT JUST FOR THE CLARIFICATION OF THE
 SMALL MINDED AND MINI TESTICULAR
 FORTITUDE INDIVIDUALS. I HAVE 2 DEGREES
 1 FROM HOWARD UNIVERSITY IN WASH
 DC.THE OTHER FROM LAMAR UNIVERSITY IN
 BEAUMONT, TX (WHICH STILL DOESN'T HAVE
 POWER AND WATER) I HAVE NEVER IN MY
 LIFE NOR MY MULTI DEGREED PARENTS LIFE
 CONSUMED DRUGS SUCH AS CRACK, HEROIN,
 METH, KUSH, ETC HOWEVER THE FEW
 EXPERTS SPEAKING ON SUCH MUST KNOW
 MORE ABOUT IT THAN SAY THAT TO SAY
 THIS DO YOUR RESEARCH! GO TO MY PAGE.
 SCROLL DOWN. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. I'M JUST
 WILLING TO SPEAK OUT! WITH THAT SAID
 THANK YOU TO ALL THAT SUPPORT US AND
 A MILLION ROUNDS OF FUs TO THOSE THAT
 DON'T #ICANTMAKETHISUP IS THE TAG
 d▼V @THESHADEROOM THANKS FOR
 THE VIEVW
This post is for your peasants @ryanharris100 @bishhop_5 @martinn6582 @niick187 @alicia_mz14 @ajdomin34 that were on my post yesterday disrespecting this woman while she was OBVIOUSLY going through a tough time. You people have no civility or self respect. You don't have the common sense to know that even if you don't agree with someone, you don't HAVE to be disrespectful. You can state your opinions in a respectful manner and not be complete assholes. It's very possible. Her comment on this post, is for you recessive, troll ass, crakkka cub, wendigo weirdo, neanderthal, pink, peckerwood, caucasoid, mayo ass peasants. Watch your fucking mouth! It's always some pale pasty ice bitch ass caveman-cavewoman talking reckless from behind a private page smh lol all of you are sad as fuck. Via @htownsrealest @papatututyru @ig_immortal HendrixBrown picoftheday photooftheday instagram repost tb throwback hiphop mood instagood love wow crazy home Houston Htown HTX diy hurricaneharvey health texas live life harvey help Melanin news redcross food icantmakethisup

This post is for your peasants @ryanharris100 @bishhop_5 @martinn6582 @niick187 @alicia_mz14 @ajdomin34 that were on my post yesterday disre...

Abraham Lincoln, Baby, It's Cold Outside, and Birthday: Edit profile neil g @NeilOdonnell82 sometimes clouds.. just look like... clouds Harrison Township, MI 169 FOLLOWING 67 FOLLOWERS Media Likes Tweets neil g NeilOdonnell82 16m @The Onion Homeland Security sides with dad following crash,baby acted alone by not opening mouth for the airplane" @Neil Odonnell 82 34m nell g @TheOnion Pokemon GO players fail to alert police after meth lab explosion, suspected dealer mistaken for a Charmander succumbs to burns" Notifications Moments Home Messages Me ..ooo Verizon 12:00 AM neil g 1,318 Tweets Media Likes Tweets neil g NeilO donnell 82 5/28/16 Onion Man Laughed at for Asking Theo Where Pager was After Waking From 30 Year Coma" "Beanie Baby Collector Hangs Self With Fanny Pack" neil g @NeilOdonnell82 5/28/16 @TheOnion Mars Curiosity Rover Bored/ Neglected,Starts Posting Obnoxious Selfies" "Chieftain Small Pox Blanket sets Antique Roadshow Record" neil g NeilO donnell 82 5/28/16 @The Onion Platypus Admits to Winging it During Evolution" "Speed Walker Sprints Away From Sex Offender, Olympic Dreams Dashed" neil g @Neil Odonnell82 5/28/16 @TheOnion AOL merges with 2 Dollar Bill In Bid to Stay Relevant" neil g NeilO donnell 82 5/28/16 @TheOnion 74 Year Old Lottery Winner Bonnie Lawson now sends Grandchildren 10 dollars on birthdays" neil g @NeilOdonnell82 5/28/16 @TheOnion Abraham Lincoln Rolls in Grave After 'Boyz 2 Men' reunion tour announced" "Comcast Manifesto inspired by Mein Kampf" neil g NeilO donnell 82 5/28/16 @TheOnion How about "Murderball Super Fan Cripples Self For Open Tryouts" "Man Places Nickel in Take a Penny Cup, Finally Nice to Give Back" Notifications Moments Home Messages Me Trying to get "The Onion" to take a chance on a 33 year old IT worker from Detroit, best years are ahead of me
Abraham Lincoln, Baby, It's Cold Outside, and Birthday: Edit profile
 neil g
 @NeilOdonnell82
 sometimes clouds.. just look like... clouds
 Harrison Township, MI
 169 FOLLOWING
 67
 FOLLOWERS
 Media
 Likes
 Tweets
 neil g
 NeilOdonnell82
 16m
 @The Onion Homeland Security sides
 with dad following crash,baby acted
 alone by not opening mouth for the
 airplane"
 @Neil Odonnell 82
 34m
 nell g
 @TheOnion Pokemon GO players fail to
 alert police after meth lab explosion,
 suspected dealer mistaken for a
 Charmander succumbs to burns"
 Notifications
 Moments
 Home
 Messages
 Me

 ..ooo Verizon
 12:00 AM
 neil g
 1,318 Tweets
 Media
 Likes
 Tweets
 neil g
 NeilO donnell 82
 5/28/16
 Onion Man Laughed at for Asking
 Theo Where Pager was After Waking From 30
 Year Coma" "Beanie Baby Collector
 Hangs Self With Fanny Pack"
 neil g
 @NeilOdonnell82
 5/28/16
 @TheOnion
 Mars Curiosity Rover Bored/
 Neglected,Starts Posting Obnoxious
 Selfies" "Chieftain Small Pox Blanket sets
 Antique Roadshow Record"
 neil g
 NeilO donnell 82
 5/28/16
 @The Onion Platypus Admits to Winging
 it During Evolution" "Speed Walker
 Sprints Away From Sex Offender,
 Olympic Dreams Dashed"
 neil g
 @Neil Odonnell82
 5/28/16
 @TheOnion
 AOL merges with 2 Dollar
 Bill In Bid to Stay Relevant"
 neil g
 NeilO donnell 82
 5/28/16
 @TheOnion 74 Year Old Lottery Winner
 Bonnie Lawson now sends Grandchildren
 10 dollars on birthdays"
 neil g
 @NeilOdonnell82
 5/28/16
 @TheOnion Abraham Lincoln Rolls in
 Grave After 'Boyz 2 Men' reunion tour
 announced" "Comcast Manifesto
 inspired by Mein Kampf"
 neil g
 NeilO donnell 82
 5/28/16
 @TheOnion How about "Murderball
 Super Fan Cripples Self For Open
 Tryouts" "Man Places Nickel in Take a
 Penny Cup, Finally Nice to Give Back"
 Notifications
 Moments
 Home
 Messages
 Me
Trying to get "The Onion" to take a chance on a 33 year old IT worker from Detroit, best years are ahead of me

Trying to get "The Onion" to take a chance on a 33 year old IT worker from Detroit, best years are ahead of me

Af, Church, and Crackhead: hrough some shit for a while, but who doesn't? everyone sorne stuf, 1 ied to him eenslant¥ He dealt with it and was there for me even when he was pesed tt ort and hurt! ' fucking hurt the man chose ⑩bemy e partner and acted lks I didnt do anything wrong every siezure, he was at the hospital wih me when we ound out I was miscamiaging So you hve something to say about me warking on my mariag ime baby! i'mfighting le you have had to for so ong! Fm point! FYOU WANT SOMETHNG YOU HAWE NEVER HAD B4 high horse! You only Know what i let you what's rest, gongon, So unti you 옛 an you just keep Iking shit and keep that mouth shut Ike a good Lol you blast your entire Ife gir, Nobody's on a high horse, You have gone back and crackhead bitches you usualy fuck with long enough to talk shit 0g bck 0 your fucking child are you taking to ine that meth must be realy strong keep itting that you gonna let her fucking fucking pet"!! Eecspt for the abuaiee stupid tak realy low and fol ow the path of distroton Not on one lgreeL on many And re just concerned and warried for yout ULD BE A FUCKING MOVIE EVERγDAY . ORUGS THIS, BITCH THAT, y ke Bitch your ucking almost 34 when you gonna get h together CRUGS and abusive boys cloud the mind girl 2th Lie Reply touched drugs, m too scared too! Yu th Lie Repy you hawing to be meck i you keep crawing bock 1o that pos Cod cant evan hap e Punting har ehurch they gonna come first?!?!1 bet they wonder that every single day tool!! You HAD Ummm ok saying God cant even help af youraalf in church and than pesting Like I sad a domt know much about it we thought we did Yap, cur now we dont cara. I hopa tat your mothar is smart snough to NEVER Your've done so much damage oing to Church is a joka So fucking sick and sad!
Af, Church, and Crackhead: hrough some shit for a while, but who doesn't?
 everyone sorne stuf, 1 ied to him eenslant¥ He dealt
 with it and was there for me even when he was pesed
 tt ort and hurt! ' fucking hurt the man chose ⑩bemy
 e partner and acted lks I didnt do anything wrong
 every siezure, he was at the hospital wih me when we
 ound out I was miscamiaging So you hve
 something to say about me warking on my mariag
 ime baby! i'mfighting le you have had to for so
 ong! Fm
 point! FYOU WANT
 SOMETHNG YOU HAWE NEVER HAD B4
 high horse! You only Know what i let you
 what's rest, gongon, So unti you 옛 an
 you just keep Iking
 shit and keep that mouth shut Ike a good
 Lol you blast your entire Ife gir, Nobody's
 on a high horse, You have gone back and
 crackhead bitches you usualy fuck with
 long enough to talk shit 0g
 bck 0 your
 fucking child
 are you taking to ine that
 meth must be realy strong keep itting that
 you gonna let her fucking
 fucking pet"!! Eecspt for the abuaiee stupid
 tak realy low and fol ow the path of
 distroton Not on one lgreeL on many And
 re just concerned and warried for yout
 ULD BE A FUCKING MOVIE
 EVERγDAY . ORUGS THIS, BITCH THAT,
 y ke Bitch your ucking almost
 34 when you gonna get h together
 CRUGS and abusive boys
 cloud the mind girl
 2th Lie Reply
 touched drugs, m too scared too! Yu
 th Lie Repy
 you hawing to be meck i
 you keep crawing bock 1o that pos
 Cod cant evan hap e
 Punting har ehurch
 they gonna come first?!?!1 bet they wonder
 that every single day tool!! You HAD
 Ummm ok saying God cant even help
 af youraalf in church and than pesting
 Like I sad a domt know much about it
 we thought we did
 Yap, cur now we dont cara. I hopa tat
 your mothar is smart snough to NEVER
 Your've done so much damage
 oing to Church is a joka
 So fucking sick and sad!
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka ing (86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (ID CKSUIN LO) 10/28/14(Tue)23.29 45 No 576373696 Story time /b be me be sophomore in college spring break sdecide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated Finaly decide to wander back to our hotel for the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that Ill never be able to forget >Tl bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to cane Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (D KsuFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23.30:33 No.576373816 25763049 cont Okay try to shit on my face Dave goes first Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face My tum next l stand over her face, knowing that my ten dolars is at stake -l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stiring within me I had gained confidence, this was my shining moment Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter SJust as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated All of my riends and I quickly forget the exporience, except for Dave Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back owhatever.gif Next day Our plane leaves the next morming, so this night was our last in San Francisco >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend much) >Find this nasty chinese buffet Eat a fuckton of food tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (ID: aKBUNFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:3203 No 576374040 cont Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face >We're going to get our money back >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious afect on Dave >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before Finally amrive at the alley where we met the hooker before Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer Dave groans through clenched teeth We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing Hooker agrees Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID KBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33.13 No.576374230 cont >Before the hooker eveถ had time to purse her lps in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal ter or the likes of which no man should ever witness Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks The hooker's screams of utfer terror slowly become muffied as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest > The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of holl remain open Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion Finally Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep Dave tuns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuciear blast in order to assess the damage >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz -She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit Dave tunms to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze Holy fuck T've killed her SThe pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo Dave quickly pulls his pants back up and we all sprint away from the alley Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka ing (86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (ID CKSUIN LO) 10/28/14(Tue)23.29 45 No 576373696
 Story time /b
 be me
 be sophomore in college
 spring break
 sdecide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 Finaly decide to wander back to our hotel for the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time
 We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that Ill never be able to forget
 >Tl bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face
 Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to cane
 Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (D KsuFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23.30:33 No.576373816 25763049
 cont
 Okay try to shit on my face
 Dave goes first
 Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face
 My tum next
 l stand over her face, knowing that my ten dolars is at stake
 -l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stiring within me
 I had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 SJust as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest
 Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
 Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated
 All of my riends and I quickly forget the exporience, except for Dave
 Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 owhatever.gif
 Next day
 Our plane leaves the next morming, so this night was our last in San Francisco
 >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend
 much)
 >Find this nasty chinese buffet
 Eat a fuckton of food tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (ID: aKBUNFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:3203 No 576374040
 cont
 Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 >We're going to get our money back
 >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious afect on Dave
 >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before
 Finally amrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer
 Dave groans through clenched teeth We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing
 Hooker agrees
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (ID KBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33.13 No.576374230
 cont
 >Before the hooker eveถ had time to purse her lps in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal ter or the
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 The hooker's screams of utfer terror slowly become muffied as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and
 chest
 > The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of holl remain open
 Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 Finally Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep
 Dave tuns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuciear blast in order to assess the damage
 >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 -She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 Dave tunms to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck T've killed her
 SThe pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 Dave quickly pulls his pants back up and we all sprint away from the alley
 Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hookaipg (86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (ID CEALED) 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696 Story time /bl >be me be sophomore in college spring break decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros 2S had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row >After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker sWe are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'll never be able to forget >"I'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face" >Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (ID: CERTEO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816トー576374049 >"Okay try to shit on my face >Dave goes first >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face >My tum next stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake sl squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me sI had gained confidence, this was my shining moment >Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter >Just as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our jouney back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and i quickly forget the experience, except for Dave >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever.gif >Next day Our plane leaves the next moning, so this night was our last in San Francisco >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend much) Find this nasty chinese" buffet >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous(ID: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14Te 23:32:03 No.576374040 cont Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face "We're going to get our money back" >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before Friends and I have no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey »Dave begins to groan and fart loadly、running even faster than before Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing" Hooker agrees >Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (D: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No. 576374230 cont >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the likes of which no man should ever witness Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks The hooker's screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open ooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage sThe Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit Dave tuns to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze >"Holy fuck I've killed her The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived Anon wins a bet
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hookaipg (86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (ID CEALED) 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696
 Story time /bl
 >be me
 be sophomore in college
 spring break
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 2S
 had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 >After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time
 >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 sWe are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'll never be able to forget
 >"I'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face"
 >Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (ID: CERTEO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816トー576374049
 >"Okay try to shit on my face
 >Dave goes first
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face
 >My tum next
 stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake
 sl squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 sI had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 >Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 >Just as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest
 Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
 Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our jouney back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and i quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever.gif
 >Next day
 Our plane leaves the next moning, so this night was our last in San Francisco
 >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend
 much)
 Find this nasty chinese" buffet
 >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous(ID: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14Te 23:32:03 No.576374040
 cont
 Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 "We're going to get our money back"
 >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 »Dave begins to groan and fart loadly、running even faster than before
 Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer
 Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing"
 Hooker agrees
 >Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (D: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No. 576374230
 cont
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 The hooker's screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and
 The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 ooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep
 >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage
 sThe Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 >She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 Dave tuns to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze
 >"Holy fuck I've killed her
 The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley
 Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived
Anon wins a bet

Anon wins a bet

Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka ipg (86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (ID: ekBunFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23 2945 No.57637366 Story time /b/ >be sophomore in college >spring break >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >I had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker >We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'll never be able to forget >"T'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face" >Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (ID: ak8UhFLO) 10/28/14Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816576374049 "Okay try to shit on my face" Dave goes first. >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face >My turn next stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake I squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me >I had gained confidence, this was my shining moment Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphind failed before me >Just as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back >whatever.gif >Next day Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was our last in San Francisco sWe decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend much) >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (ID: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing sWe get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face >"We're going to get our money back >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before Friends and I have no choice but to follow > Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before >Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corner >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing" >Hooker agrees >Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID: aK8UhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly >The hooker's screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open >Hooker attempts to protect her already sca >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass still exposed to the breeze > "Holy fuck I've killed her" > The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley >Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived at-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion Anon loses money.
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka ipg (86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (ID: ekBunFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23 2945 No.57637366
 Story time /b/
 >be sophomore in college
 >spring break
 >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >I had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time
 >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 >We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'll never be able to forget
 >"T'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face"
 >Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (ID: ak8UhFLO) 10/28/14Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816576374049
 "Okay try to shit on my face"
 Dave goes first.
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face
 >My turn next
 stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake
 I squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 >I had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphind failed before me
 >Just as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest
 >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
 >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 >whatever.gif
 >Next day
 Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was our last in San Francisco
 sWe decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend
 much)
 >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet
 >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (ID: akBUhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040
 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 sWe get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 >"We're going to get our money back
 >Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 > Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before
 >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 >Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corner
 >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing"
 >Hooker agrees
 >Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (ID: aK8UhFLO) 10/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly
 >The hooker's screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and
 chest
 >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 >Hooker attempts to protect her already sca
 >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep
 >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage
 >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 >She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass still exposed to the breeze
 > "Holy fuck I've killed her"
 > The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley
 >Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived
 at-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
Anon loses money.

Anon loses money.

Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka jpg 86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696 Story time /b/ be me be sophomore in college spring break decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually ou rip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hote or the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great ucking time We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker. We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that never be able to forget bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face >Dave immediately takes her up on the offe me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (ID EKBUhFuo) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049 cont "Okay o shit on my face Dave goes firs >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave erally can not shit on he aCe My turn nex stand over her ace, knowing that my ten dollars at stake squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me had gained confidence, this was my shining moment he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter >Just as Dave had failed before m was unnsuccessful in my ques >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on he aCe Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish ou ourney back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn' able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever Next day >Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was ou n San Francisco aS >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (afte osing our money to the hooke we decided not o spend much >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet >Eat a fuckton or ood, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040 cont >Decide to go back to the hot o chill and start packing >We get back to the Ho and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face "We're going to get our money back Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave Dave runs out of the hot o go find the hooke rom the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow >Dave doubles over n stomach pain, s he feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey running W >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even fas han before >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corne >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to and shit on your ace again, double or nothing Hooker agrees Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same posi on >Dave stands over her remain transfixed with anticipation ace as Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 cont >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphinc he began to release an unholy anal likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry egions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks >The hooker's screams of utter error slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover he ace and ches >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open Hooker attempts to protect her alrea scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itsel o sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blas o assess the damage >The Hooker erally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell rem scient of the prison cells in Auschwitz She's not even moving anymore, she o shock by the force of Dave's shi ays S >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s exposed to the breeze Holy fuck I've killed her >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley don't know what happened to that hooke or if she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka
 jpg 86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696
 Story time /b/
 be me
 be sophomore in college
 spring break
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually ou
 rip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 >Finally decide to wander back to our hote
 or the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great
 ucking time
 We are suddenly approached by
 one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker.
 We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that
 never be able to forget
 bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face
 >Dave immediately takes her up on the offe
 me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (ID
 EKBUhFuo) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049
 cont
 "Okay
 o shit on my face
 Dave goes firs
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave
 erally can not shit on he
 aCe
 My turn nex
 stand over her
 ace, knowing that my ten dollars
 at stake
 squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 >Just as Dave had failed before m
 was unnsuccessful in my ques
 >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on he
 aCe
 Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish ou
 ourney back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn'
 able to shit on the hooker's face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever
 Next day
 >Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was ou
 n San Francisco
 aS
 >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (afte
 osing our money to the hooke
 we decided not
 o spend
 much
 >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet
 >Eat a fuckton or
 ood, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040
 cont
 >Decide to go back to the hot
 o chill and start packing
 >We get back to the Ho
 and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 "We're going to get our money back
 Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 Dave runs out
 of the hot
 o go find the hooke
 rom the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 >Dave doubles over
 n stomach pain, s
 he feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 running W
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even fas
 han before
 >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute
 is
 stading at the same corne
 >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to
 and shit on your
 ace again, double or nothing
 Hooker agrees
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same posi
 on
 >Dave stands over her
 remain transfixed with anticipation
 ace as
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 cont
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphinc
 he began to release an unholy anal
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry
 egions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 >The hooker's screams of utter
 error slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover he
 ace and
 ches
 >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 Hooker attempts to protect her alrea
 scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itsel
 o sleep
 >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared
 to a nuclear blas
 o assess the damage
 >The Hooker
 erally covered from head
 to toe in shit, with a smell rem
 scient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 She's not even moving anymore, she
 o shock by the force of Dave's shi
 ays S
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s
 exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck I've killed her
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley
 don't know what happened to that hooke
 or if she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka jpg 86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696 Story time /b/ be me be sophomore in college spring break decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually ou rip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hote or the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great ucking time We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker. We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that never be able to forget bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face >Dave immediately takes her up on the offe me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (ID EKBUhFuo) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049 cont "Okay o shit on my face Dave goes firs >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave erally can not shit on he aCe My turn nex stand over her ace, knowing that my ten dollars at stake squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me had gained confidence, this was my shining moment he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter >Just as Dave had failed before m was unnsuccessful in my ques >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on he aCe Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish ou ourney back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn' able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever Next day >Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was ou n San Francisco aS >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (afte osing our money to the hooke we decided not o spend much >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet >Eat a fuckton or ood, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040 cont >Decide to go back to the hot o chill and start packing >We get back to the Ho and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face "We're going to get our money back Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave Dave runs out of the hot o go find the hooke rom the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow >Dave doubles over n stomach pain, s he feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey running W >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even fas han before >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corne >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to and shit on your ace again, double or nothing Hooker agrees Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same posi on >Dave stands over her remain transfixed with anticipation ace as Anonymous (ID K8UhFLQ 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 cont >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphinc he began to release an unholy anal likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry egions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks >The hooker's screams of utter error slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover he ace and ches >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open >Hooker attempts to protect her alrea scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itsel o sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blas o assess the damage >The Hooker erally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell rem scient of the prison cells in Auschwitz She's not even moving anymore, she o shock by the force of Dave's shi ays S >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s exposed to the breeze Holy fuck I've killed her >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley don't know what happened to that hooke or if she even survived Anon Loses a Bet
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka
 jpg 86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14(Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696
 Story time /b/
 be me
 be sophomore in college
 spring break
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >l had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 >Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 >Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually ou
 rip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 >Finally decide to wander back to our hote
 or the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great
 ucking time
 We are suddenly approached by
 one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker.
 We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that
 never be able to forget
 bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face
 >Dave immediately takes her up on the offe
 me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (ID
 EKBUhFuo) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049
 cont
 "Okay
 o shit on my face
 Dave goes firs
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave
 erally can not shit on he
 aCe
 My turn nex
 stand over her
 ace, knowing that my ten dollars
 at stake
 squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 >Just as Dave had failed before m
 was unnsuccessful in my ques
 >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on he
 aCe
 Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish ou
 ourney back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn'
 able to shit on the hooker's face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever
 Next day
 >Our plane leaves the next morning, so this night was ou
 n San Francisco
 aS
 >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (afte
 osing our money to the hooke
 we decided not
 o spend
 much
 >Find this nasty "chinese" buffet
 >Eat a fuckton or
 ood, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No.576374040
 cont
 >Decide to go back to the hot
 o chill and start packing
 >We get back to the Ho
 and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 "We're going to get our money back
 Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 Dave runs out
 of the hot
 o go find the hooke
 rom the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 >Dave doubles over
 n stomach pain, s
 he feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 running W
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even fas
 han before
 >Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute
 is
 stading at the same corne
 >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to
 and shit on your
 ace again, double or nothing
 Hooker agrees
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same posi
 on
 >Dave stands over her
 remain transfixed with anticipation
 ace as
 Anonymous (ID
 K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 cont
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphinc
 he began to release an unholy anal
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry
 egions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 >The hooker's screams of utter
 error slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover he
 ace and
 ches
 >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 >Hooker attempts to protect her alrea
 scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itsel
 o sleep
 >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared
 to a nuclear blas
 o assess the damage
 >The Hooker
 erally covered from head
 to toe in shit, with a smell rem
 scient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 She's not even moving anymore, she
 o shock by the force of Dave's shi
 ays S
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s
 exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck I've killed her
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley
 don't know what happened to that hooke
 or if she even survived
Anon Loses a Bet

Anon Loses a Bet

Asian, Chill, and College: File: hooka ipg (86 KB, 620x465) Anonymous (D: aKBUhFLO) 10/28'14(Tue)23:29 45 No.576373696 Story time b/ be sophomore in college break >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros I had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard this dude would do just about anything for a laugh In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight. Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in Sen Fran Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row >After a few hours of clubbing we wore pretty freaking inobriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker >We are not interested in acquiing vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'l never be able to forgel >I'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then procoods to lay down with her face upwards Anonymous (D: akBUhFL 10/28/14Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816576374049 cont > Okay try to shit on my face Dave goes first >Dave puls his pants down and exposes his bare ass Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead she blows on his asshole >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehy drated raisin, Dave Iiterally can not shit on her face sMy tum next sl stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake 5l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me >i had gained confidence, this was my shining moment PJust as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole a great wind swept up from the prostliute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter Just as Dave had failod boforo me, I was unnsuccossful in my quest SHooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our joumey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience except for Dave Dave becomes legitmately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back swhatever.gif >Next day sOur plane leaves the next moming, so this night was our last in San Francisco sWe decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spand much) Find this nasty chinese buffet >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of realy spicy stuff Anonymous (D: KBUFLO) 10/28/14 Tue)23:3203 No 576374040 cont s Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and stert packing >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face We're going to got our monoy back Apparenty the c SDave runs out of the hotel to go tind the hooker from the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and deterimination of a tigress hunting her prey Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before Finally arive at the alley where we met the hooker before sSure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corner sDave groans through clanched tooth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing >Hooker agrees S Takes us back to the same place as before, and iays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfxed with anticipation buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave Anonymous (ID: akRUhFLO) 1/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No 576374230 cont >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the likes of which no man should ever witness sDave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks >The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open 100ker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion Finally Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep Dave tuns around, baro ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be comparod to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damago > The Hooker is literaly covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still. put into shock by the force of Dave's shit Dave tums to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze "Holy fuck Ive killed her" >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley Still don't know what happoned to that hookor, or if she oven survived
Asian, Chill, and College: File: hooka ipg (86 KB, 620x465)
 Anonymous (D: aKBUhFLO) 10/28'14(Tue)23:29 45 No.576373696
 Story time b/
 be sophomore in college
 break
 >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 I had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight.
 Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
 Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in Sen Fran
 Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 >After a few hours of clubbing we wore pretty freaking inobriated
 >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time
 >We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 >We are not interested in acquiing vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'l never be able to forgel
 >I'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face
 Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then procoods to lay down with her face upwards
 Anonymous (D: akBUhFL
 10/28/14Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816576374049
 cont
 > Okay try to shit on my face
 Dave goes first
 >Dave puls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead she blows on his asshole
 >Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehy drated raisin, Dave Iiterally can not shit on her face
 sMy tum next
 sl stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake
 5l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 >i had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 PJust as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole a great wind swept up from the prostliute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 Just as Dave had failod boforo me, I was unnsuccossful in my quest
 SHooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
 Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our joumey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience except for Dave
 Dave becomes legitmately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 swhatever.gif
 >Next day
 sOur plane leaves the next moming, so this night was our last in San Francisco
 sWe decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spand
 much)
 Find this nasty chinese buffet
 >Eat a fuckton of food, tons of realy spicy stuff
 Anonymous (D: KBUFLO) 10/28/14 Tue)23:3203 No 576374040
 cont
 s Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and stert packing
 >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 We're going to got our monoy back
 Apparenty the c
 SDave runs out of the hotel to go tind the hooker from the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and deterimination of a tigress hunting her prey
 Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before
 Finally arive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 sSure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same corner
 sDave groans through clanched tooth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing
 >Hooker agrees
 S Takes us back to the same place as before, and iays in the same position
 >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfxed with anticipation
 buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 Anonymous (ID: akRUhFLO) 1/28/14(Tue)23:33:13 No 576374230
 cont
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 sDave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 >The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and
 >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 100ker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 Finally Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep
 Dave tuns around, baro ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be comparod to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damago
 > The Hooker is literaly covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still. put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 Dave tums to us with a serious expression on his face bare ass still exposed to the breeze
 "Holy fuck Ive killed her"
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
 Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley
 Still don't know what happoned to that hookor, or if she oven survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka jpg KB, 620x465 86 Anonymous (ID 0/28/14 (Tue)23:29:45 No.57637 3696 akBUhFLO Story time /b/ >be me be sophomore in college spring break >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >I had this one we'll call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do about anything for a laugh In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight Go clubbing every night, having me of our lives Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the nigh Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking e suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, contin >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'il never be able to forget bet each of you boy s ten dollars that you can't shit on my face Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards O Anonymous (ID: K8UhFLQ 10/28/14(Tue) 23:30:33 No.576373816 22576374049 Okay try to shit on my face >Dave goes first >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole hole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face My turn next >l stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars at stake squeeze my bowels like l've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a ma shit log stirring within me had gained confidence, this was my shining moment he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swe pt up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter Dave had failed before me. was unnsuccessful in my ques >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our joumey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and i quickly forget the experience, except for Dave >Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever g Next day Our plane leaves the next his night was our last in San Francisco morning >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend much >Find this nasty chinese buffet Eat a fuckton of food, ons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (ID CKEUNFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 5763 74040 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face "We're going to get our money back Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before Friends and I hav e no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before >Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We wan try and shit on your face again, double or nothing >Hooker agrees >Takes us back to the same ace as before, and lays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID CKBUhFLO) 10/28/14ITue)23:33:13 No.576374230 >cont >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he bega n to release an un holy anal terror the likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks gendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and >The hookers screams of utter temor slowly become muffled as le chest >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open -buried face with her hands. which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's Hooker attempts to protect her alrea nal explosion SC a >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still put into shock by the force of Dave's shit >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass still exposed to the breeze Holy fuck I've killed her" >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alle don't know what happened to that hooker, or she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hooka jpg KB, 620x465
 86 Anonymous (ID
 0/28/14 (Tue)23:29:45 No.57637 3696
 akBUhFLO
 Story time /b/
 >be me
 be sophomore in college
 spring break
 >decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >I had this one
 we'll call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do
 about anything for a laugh
 In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 Go clubbing every night, having
 me of our lives
 Eventually
 our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran
 >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the nigh
 Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking
 e suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, contin
 >As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'il never be able to forget
 bet each of you boy
 s ten dollars that you can't shit on my face
 Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care
 >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then
 proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
 O Anonymous (ID: K8UhFLQ
 10/28/14(Tue) 23:30:33 No.576373816
 22576374049
 Okay try to shit on my face
 >Dave goes first
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
 hole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face
 My turn next
 >l stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars
 at stake
 squeeze my bowels like l've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a ma
 shit log
 stirring within me
 had gained confidence, this was my shining moment
 he tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swe
 pt up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 Dave had failed before me.
 was unnsuccessful in my ques
 >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
 >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our joumey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends
 and i quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 >Dave becomes legitimately angy that
 he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face
 >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever g
 Next day
 Our plane leaves the next
 his night was our last in San Francisco
 morning
 >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend
 much
 >Find this nasty chinese buffet
 Eat a fuckton of food,
 ons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (ID
 CKEUNFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 5763 74040
 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 >We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
 "We're going to get
 our money back
 Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
 >Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 Friends and I hav
 e no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before
 Finally
 arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
 >Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer
 >Dave groans through clenched teeth "We wan
 try and shit on your face again, double or nothing
 >Hooker agrees
 >Takes us back to the same
 ace as before, and lays in the same position
 >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (ID
 CKBUhFLO) 10/28/14ITue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 >cont
 >Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he bega
 n to release an un
 holy anal terror the
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks
 gendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and
 >The hookers screams of utter temor slowly become muffled as le
 chest
 >The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 -buried face with her hands. which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's Hooker attempts to protect her alrea
 nal explosion
 SC a
 >Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep
 >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage
 The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 She's not even moving anymore, she just
 lays still put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his
 face,bare ass still exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck I've killed her"
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque
 brown halo
 >Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alle
 don't know what happened to that hooker, or
 she even survived
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook jpg 86 KB, 620x465) 0/28/14Tue) 23:29:45 No.576373696 K8UhFLQ Story time /b/ spring bl decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros I had this one buddy, we call him Dave >Dave was a fucking wildcard this dude would do just about anything for a laugh In San Francisco after an aw ed-eye flight. Go clubbing every night, ng the time of our lives Eventually coming to a close, and only had a couple m days left in San F de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated Finally decide to nder back to our hotel for the night >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha g a great fucking We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget bet h of you boys that you c Hooker takes us ith her face Anonymous (D: CKBUNFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049 Okay try to shit on my face Dave goes first. >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's d, she blows on his assh >Asshol immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit My turn next >l stand over her face, knowing that my te s at stake like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me I squeeze my bowels had gained confidence, this was my shining momen the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros e's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter ed bet Hooker proceeds to do the s h of my friends, not a one of us can shit on h >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave e becomes legitimately a that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back hatever gif Next day >We deci o go around and e er at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, e decided not to spend much) >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (D: EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040 cont. >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing We get back Apparently the chil ing to have a s Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha before ey where we met the hooker before eth head prostitut g at the Dave groans through c Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID EKBUhFLO) 10/28/1 Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 >cont. Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal likes of which no man should ever witness ets out a defe g warcry as legions of liquid shit sp his fiercly vibrating a heeks >The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried fac ith her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal expl d flarps its >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell remin the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she ays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s o the breeze Holy fuck I've killed her" >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b halo quickly pulls pants back up, and sprint away >Sti hat happened to that h
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook
 jpg 86 KB, 620x465)
 0/28/14Tue) 23:29:45 No.576373696
 K8UhFLQ
 Story time /b/
 spring bl
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 I had this one buddy, we
 call him Dave
 >Dave was a fucking wildcard
 this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 In San Francisco after an aw
 ed-eye flight.
 Go clubbing every night,
 ng the time of our lives
 Eventually
 coming to a close, and
 only had a couple m
 days left in San F
 de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 Finally decide to
 nder back to our hotel for the night
 >Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha
 g a great fucking
 We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to
 walk
 As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget
 bet
 h of you boys
 that you c
 Hooker takes us
 ith her face
 Anonymous (D: CKBUNFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:30:33 No. 576373816 576374049
 Okay try to shit on my face
 Dave goes first.
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass
 he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's
 d, she blows on his assh
 >Asshol
 immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit
 My turn next
 >l stand over her face, knowing that my te
 s at stake
 like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
 I squeeze my bowels
 had gained confidence, this was my shining momen
 the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros
 e's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 ed bet
 Hooker proceeds to do the s
 h of my friends, not a
 one of us can shit
 on h
 >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 e becomes legitimately a
 that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face
 Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 hatever gif
 Next day
 >We deci
 o go around and e
 er at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker,
 e decided not to spend
 much)
 >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet
 Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (D: EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040
 cont.
 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 We get back
 Apparently the chil
 ing to have a s
 Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha
 before
 ey where we met the hooker before
 eth head prostitut
 g at the
 Dave groans through c
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 Dave stands over her face as
 I remain transfixed with
 anticipation
 Anonymous (ID
 EKBUhFLO) 10/28/1 Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 >cont.
 Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 ets out a defe
 g warcry as legions of liquid shit sp
 his fiercly vibrating a
 heeks
 >The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet
 cover her face and
 chest
 The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried fac
 ith her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal expl
 d flarps its
 >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe
 in shit, with a smell remin
 the prison cells in Auschwitz
 >She's not even moving anymore, she
 ays still, put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass s
 o the breeze
 Holy fuck I've killed her"
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched
 shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b
 halo
 quickly pulls
 pants back up, and
 sprint away
 >Sti
 hat happened to that h
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 oy
 you for avoiding them
Puns, Puppies, and Struggle: 16 hrs Wow, Here's a moment straight from my own mouth. Let's all mourn the spoiled brat, drug addicts, who didn't appreciate the lives they were fortunate enough to be granted while the real heroes who advance our species, get buried in all this so called news I for one would like to dedicate my 2016 mourn trend post to Vera Rubin, and bid that you please read the article l have posted along with this in my eyes SHE'S A TRUE HERO How can people shun the begging bums who love drugs, yet post this heart warming nonsense. A famous actors daughter, one placed in a role for who she was born too, who's acting only turned out to be believable because she was railing lines of cocaine n getting plowed in real life by her on-screen' lover, whom btw was "married in real life and that's talent? or more likely just all around bad karma? People are morning a fictional character, not a real person aside from delusion being a sickness in itself, you don't even realize the terrifying message being spread as a separate consequence Your CHILDREN are going to go research her, theyre going to research Mr Meth' and then WHAM (no pun intended); find info on all his HIV inducing drug fueled 'orgies' and see EVERY truth to what he did, and than translate that behavior as being OK by the way you speak of the The internet hides no secrets. These deaths should be a lesson to our youth on how NOT to act but were too busy making the m believe its OK to destroy their lives, not weigh out consequence and than ask for forgiveness; as if all the damage they did will simply vanish I'm sorry, but here's a dose of reality: The Grim Reeper doesn't take forgiveness into account. God's taking out the trash. By all means... let it continue Hollywood needs a bath and it's time we start to recognize the intelligent people who actually deserve it. Set positive examples for the youth that will one day run our futures, and quit being third party marketers for Passions Malibu Sigh. Muuurricaaaaa Like Reply O 1 16 hrs Edited Gee judgmental at all? Who made you God? Like Reply O3-15 hrs Judgement is an evolutionary advantage created to Op allow one the ability to AvolD PROBLEMS. Education w introduce you on how to avoid bad judgement. Comical here in my text did l proclaim l as god? lol. didn't kill these scummy people, your god did. Your attack is merely a psychological projection of anger telling me your either a recovering addict or have a family member that is.. to which its times to stop living in denial and accept the truth of the situation. ADDICTION IS GREED. ADDICTION IS SELFISH... and when you have hundreds of thousands of people struggling to get a career, that these people were handed..... AND THREE AWAY..... and THEN we plan to teach that as W being OK to our children Sorry but the posts should be reading WHAT A WASTE Like Reply O 13 hrs Edited Amen! Like Reply 4 hrs Write a reply udgement is an evolutionary advantage created to allow one the OP bility to AvoID PROBLEMs. Education will introduce you on how to avoid bad udgement. Comical here in my text did l proclaim as god? lol. l didn't kill these scummy people, your god did. Your attack is merely a psychological projection of anger telling me your either a recovering addict or have a family member that is.. to which its times to stop living in denial and accept the truth of the situation. ADDICTION IS GREED ADDICTION IS SELFISH. l have no patience anymore for weak minded souls... by all means, delete me... don't even know you. Anybody else that feels the same, please follow suit. e had enough keeping my mouth shut while Walmart mentality destroys the millennials mind. This is exactly what's wrong with this country... get off my page and go find some videos of puppies being abused to comment on. You will have greater impact there. 13 hours ago Evolutionarily advantaged model only mourns smart people, because no patience for weak minded souls.
Puns, Puppies, and Struggle: 16 hrs
 Wow, Here's a
 moment straight from my own mouth. Let's all
 mourn the spoiled brat, drug addicts, who didn't appreciate the lives they
 were fortunate enough to be granted
 while the real heroes who advance
 our species, get buried in all this so called news
 I for one would like
 to dedicate my 2016 mourn trend post to Vera Rubin, and bid that you
 please read the article l have posted along with this
 in my eyes
 SHE'S A TRUE HERO
 How can people shun the
 begging bums who love drugs, yet post this
 heart warming nonsense. A famous actors daughter, one placed in a role
 for who she was born too, who's acting only turned out to be believable
 because she
 was railing lines of cocaine n getting plowed in
 real life
 by
 her on-screen' lover, whom btw was "married in real life
 and that's
 talent? or more likely just all around bad karma?
 People are morning a fictional character, not a real person
 aside from
 delusion being a sickness in itself, you don't even realize the terrifying
 message being spread as a separate consequence
 Your CHILDREN are going to go research her, theyre going to research
 Mr Meth' and then
 WHAM (no pun intended); find info on all his HIV
 inducing drug fueled 'orgies' and see EVERY truth to what he did, and
 than translate that behavior as being OK by the way you speak of the
 The internet hides no secrets. These deaths should be a lesson to our
 youth on how NOT to act
 but were too busy making the
 m believe its
 OK to destroy their lives, not weigh out consequence and than ask for
 forgiveness; as if all the damage they did will simply vanish
 I'm sorry, but
 here's a dose of reality: The Grim Reeper doesn't take forgiveness into
 account. God's taking out the trash. By all means... let it continue
 Hollywood needs a bath and it's time we start to recognize the intelligent
 people who actually deserve it. Set positive examples for the youth that
 will one day run our futures, and quit being third party marketers for
 Passions Malibu
 Sigh. Muuurricaaaaa

 Like Reply
 O 1 16 hrs Edited
 Gee judgmental at all? Who made you God?
 Like Reply O3-15 hrs
 Judgement is an evolutionary advantage created to
 Op
 allow one the ability to AvolD PROBLEMS. Education w
 introduce you on
 how to avoid bad judgement.
 Comical
 here in my text did l proclaim l as god? lol. didn't kill these
 scummy people, your god did. Your attack is merely a psychological projection
 of anger telling me your either a recovering addict or have a family member
 that is.. to which its times to stop living in denial and accept the truth of the
 situation. ADDICTION IS GREED. ADDICTION IS SELFISH... and when you have
 hundreds of thousands of people struggling to get a career, that these people
 were handed..... AND THREE
 AWAY..... and THEN we plan to teach that as
 W being OK to our children
 Sorry but the posts should be reading WHAT A
 WASTE
 Like Reply O
 13 hrs Edited
 Amen!
 Like Reply 4 hrs
 Write a reply

 udgement is an evolutionary advantage created to allow one the
 OP bility to AvoID PROBLEMs. Education will introduce you on how to avoid bad
 udgement.
 Comical
 here in my text did l proclaim
 as god? lol. l didn't kill these scummy
 people, your god did. Your attack is merely a psychological projection of anger telling me
 your either a recovering addict or have a family member that is.. to which its times to
 stop living in denial and accept the truth of the situation. ADDICTION IS GREED
 ADDICTION IS SELFISH. l have no patience anymore for weak minded souls... by all
 means, delete me... don't even know you. Anybody else that feels the same, please
 follow suit. e had enough keeping my mouth shut
 while Walmart mentality destroys the
 millennials mind. This is exactly what's wrong with this country... get off my page and
 go find some videos of puppies being abused to comment on. You will have greater
 impact there.
 13 hours ago
Evolutionarily advantaged model only mourns smart people, because no patience for weak minded souls.

Evolutionarily advantaged model only mourns smart people, because no patience for weak minded souls.

Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook 86 KB, 620x465 Anonymous (D: K8UhFLQ 0/28/14Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696 Story time /b/ be me pring b decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >I had this one buddy we call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight Go clubbing every night, ng the time of ou Eventually p was coming to a close, and only had a couple mi days left in San Fran de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated Finally decide to der back to our hotel for the night Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha g a great fucking We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget bet h of you boys that you c of my friend Hooker takes us alley, then proceeds to lay d n with her Anonymous (D: eKBUhFLO 10/28 14(Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816 576374049 Okay try to shit on my face Dave goes first. >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare a he's about to pinch a log off onto this eth addi d, she blows on his ass >Asshol dehydrated My turn next >I stand over her face, knowing that my ten do s at stake >l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log s g within me had gained confidence, this was my shining momen the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros e's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter iled before me, I was unns r proceeds to do the same one of us can shit on her >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave e becomes legitimately a that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever gif Next day ves the next morning, so this was our last in San Francisco >We deci o go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker e decided not to spend much) >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (D: ECBuhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040 >Cont. >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing We get back to the Hotel Apparently the chil Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s running with the ferocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha before ey where we met the hooker before eth head prostitut g at the groans through clenched Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 >cont. Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defe ns of liquid shit sp between his fiercly vibrating at cheeks The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion d flarps its >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscent of the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she put into shock by the force of Dave's shit ays >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass s exposed to the breeze Holy fuck I've ed her >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b halo quickly pulls pants back up, and sprint away >Sti hat happened to that h Anon wins a bet
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook
 86 KB, 620x465
 Anonymous (D: K8UhFLQ
 0/28/14Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696
 Story time /b/
 be me
 pring b
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >I had this one buddy
 we
 call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard
 this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 Go clubbing every night,
 ng the time of ou
 Eventually
 p was coming to a close, and
 only had a couple mi
 days left in San Fran
 de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 Finally decide to
 der back to our hotel for the night
 Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha
 g a great fucking
 We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 We are not
 interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget
 bet
 h of you boys
 that you c
 of my friend
 Hooker takes us
 alley, then proceeds to lay d
 n with her
 Anonymous (D: eKBUhFLO 10/28 14(Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816
 576374049
 Okay try to shit on my face
 Dave goes first.
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare a
 he's about to pinch a log off onto this
 eth addi
 d, she blows on his ass
 >Asshol
 dehydrated
 My turn next
 >I stand over her face, knowing that my ten do
 s at stake
 >l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log s
 g within me
 had gained confidence, this was my shining momen
 the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros
 e's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 iled before me, I was unns
 r proceeds to do the same
 one of us can shit
 on her
 >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 e becomes legitimately a
 that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face
 Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever gif
 Next day
 ves the next morning, so this
 was our last in San Francisco
 >We deci
 o go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker
 e decided not to spend
 much)
 >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet
 Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (D: ECBuhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040
 >Cont.
 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 We get back
 to the Hotel
 Apparently the chil
 Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s
 running with the ferocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha
 before
 ey where we met the hooker before
 eth head prostitut
 g at the
 groans through clenched
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 >Dave stands over her face as
 I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (ID
 EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 >cont.
 Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defe
 ns of liquid shit sp
 between his fiercly vibrating at
 cheeks
 The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet
 cover her face and
 chest
 The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 d flarps its
 >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe
 in shit, with a smell reminiscent of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 >She's not even moving anymore, she
 put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 ays
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass s
 exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck I've
 ed her
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b
 halo
 quickly pulls
 pants back up, and
 sprint away
 >Sti
 hat happened to that h
Anon wins a bet

Anon wins a bet

Cars, Crazy, and Dogs: 30 points 7 hours ago Funny story. I do boats for a living. I was driving home from the supply shop and I tested my limits with a yellow light, and got pulled over. I had a couple of gallons of fiber glass resin, as well as gel coat, in the back seat of the truck. I also had a 3 pound ziplock bag of a product called Cabosil on the passenger seat. Cabosil is a thickening agent used in fiberglass resins, it looks exactly like cocaine. It is also really nasty stuff, you do not want to get it into your r nose. (You are in for an ER visit if you do). So cop pulls me over, see's the bag of Cabosil on the eyes, mou passenger seat. Without warning, he pulls is pistol and points it right in my face, telling me to both put my hands up and get out of the truck at the same time. I've got my hands up, the cop is screaming get out of the truck, I'm looking at him and I say who is going to open the door, you or me? He opens the door and rips me out of the truck, throws me on the ground, and cuffs me. (He was a wicked asshole). 2 minutes later 10 other cop cars show up, and a drug dog shows up. The cops asked me where I got all that cocaine from. At that point I put it all together and I looked at moron that is not cocaine. that is cabos He started the cop that cuffed me, shook my head, and said "You fucking fuming because I called him a moron and actually tried to kick me in the head. I ducked as he kicked, causing him t ich only made him more mad, but before he could get a 2nd shot in the other cops pulled him aside. Finally a mISS sargent came over and asked me what "the suspicious powder was". I explained to him that it was a thickening agent for fiberglass resins, which went right over his head. He started to call the drug dog over and I told him if that if the dog gets any of that stuff in his mouth or nose he's probably going to die. They ended up calling another car out with some kind of drug testing kit in it. There were about to open the bag and I asked them not to because the stuff is so fluffy that you don't want to open it outdoors, especially without a mask, the shit goes everywhere with the slightest breeze. Well the morons open the bag, half of it went every where, including all over their faces. One moron starts hacking like crazy and ends up in the back of an ambulance, the other moron ends up with a bloody nose. They test the cabosil and it comes back negative for cocaine, but now they think it's meth or some other drug and they want to arrest me, and send this stuff to the drug lab. At this point I tell Major sargent Moron to call the supply house, and ask them what cabos looks like. Luckily, the owner the supply house (who I am of friendly with) threw 10 bags of cabosil in his car, along with the MSDS sheets on it, and drove down to where I was sitting. Then the asshats wanted to take all that and arrest him as well. Luckily the guy who owned the supply shops brother is also a lawyer who worked in town. He came down and finally, after 3 fucking hours in hand cuffs sitting on a sidewalk, got it straightened out. After that entire ordeal, not one apology was given. Plus, I had to buy another bag of cabos because the morons dumped half of mine out. The only joy I got out of this was when the moron with the nose bleed picked up the MSDS sheet and read it. There is a line that reads "Substance is toxic to lungs and mucous membranes Repeated or prolonged exposure to the substance can produce target organs damage". When he read that he almost had a mental breakdown, was on the phone with somebody, freaking out and thinking he was about to die TL DR Google Cabosil... Don't ever get caught with it nk embed save report give gold reply perma Man fends off moron cops with both skill and wit
Cars, Crazy, and Dogs: 30 points 7 hours ago
 Funny story. I do boats for a
 living. I was driving home from the supply shop and I tested my limits with a yellow
 light, and got pulled over. I had a couple of gallons of fiber glass resin, as well as gel coat, in the back seat of the
 truck. I also had a 3 pound ziplock bag of a product called Cabosil on the passenger seat. Cabosil is a thickening agent
 used in fiberglass resins, it looks exactly like cocaine. It is also really nasty stuff, you do not want to get it into your
 r nose. (You are in for an ER visit if you do). So cop pulls me over, see's the bag of Cabosil on the
 eyes, mou
 passenger seat. Without warning, he pulls is pistol and points it right in my face, telling me to both put my hands up
 and get out of the truck at the same time. I've got my hands up, the cop is screaming get out of the truck, I'm looking
 at him and I say who is going to open the door, you or me? He opens the door and rips me out of the truck, throws
 me on the ground, and cuffs me. (He was a wicked asshole). 2 minutes later 10 other cop cars show up, and a drug
 dog shows up. The cops asked me where I got all that cocaine from. At that point I put it all together and I looked at
 moron that is not cocaine. that is cabos
 He started
 the cop that cuffed me, shook my head, and said "You fucking
 fuming because I called him a moron and actually tried to kick me in the head. I ducked as he kicked, causing him t
 ich only made him more mad, but before he could get a 2nd shot in the other cops pulled him aside. Finally a
 mISS
 sargent came over and asked me what "the suspicious powder was". I explained to him that it was a thickening agent
 for fiberglass resins, which went right over
 his head. He started to call the drug dog over and I told him if that if the
 dog gets any of that stuff in his mouth or nose he's probably going to die. They ended up calling another car out with
 some kind of drug testing kit in it. There were about to open the bag and I asked them not to because the stuff is so
 fluffy that you don't want to open it outdoors, especially without a mask, the shit goes everywhere with the slightest
 breeze. Well the morons open the bag, half of it went every where, including all over their faces. One moron starts
 hacking like crazy and ends up in the back of an ambulance, the other moron ends up with a bloody nose. They test
 the cabosil and it comes back negative for cocaine, but now they think it's meth
 or some other drug and they want to
 arrest me, and send this stuff to the drug lab. At this point I tell Major sargent Moron to call the supply house, and
 ask them what cabos
 looks like. Luckily, the owner the supply house (who I am of friendly with) threw 10 bags of
 cabosil in his car, along with the MSDS sheets on it, and drove down to where I was sitting. Then the asshats wanted
 to take all that and arrest him as well. Luckily the guy who owned the supply shops brother is also a lawyer who
 worked in town. He came down and finally, after 3 fucking hours in hand cuffs sitting on a sidewalk, got it
 straightened out. After that entire ordeal, not one apology was given. Plus, I had to buy another bag of cabos
 because the morons dumped half of mine out. The only joy I got out of this was when the moron with the nose bleed
 picked up the MSDS sheet and read it. There is a line that reads "Substance is toxic to lungs and mucous membranes
 Repeated or prolonged exposure to the substance can produce target organs damage". When he read that he almost
 had a mental breakdown, was on the phone with somebody, freaking out and thinking he was about to die
 TL DR Google Cabosil... Don't ever get caught with it
 nk embed save
 report give gold reply
 perma
Man fends off moron cops with both skill and wit

Man fends off moron cops with both skill and wit

Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook 86 KB, 620x465 Anonymous (D: K8UhFLQ 0/28/14Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696 Story time /b/ be me pring b decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >I had this one buddy we call him Dave Dave was a fucking wildcard this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight Go clubbing every night, ng the time of ou Eventually p was coming to a close, and only had a couple mi days left in San Fran de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated Finally decide to der back to our hotel for the night Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha g a great fucking We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget bet h of you boys that you c of my friend Hooker takes us alley, then proceeds to lay d n with her Anonymous (D: eKBUhFLO 10/28 14(Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816 576374049 Okay try to shit on my face Dave goes first. >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare a he's about to pinch a log off onto this eth addi d, she blows on his ass >Asshol dehydrated My turn next >I stand over her face, knowing that my ten do s at stake >l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log s g within me had gained confidence, this was my shining momen the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros e's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter iled before me, I was unns r proceeds to do the same one of us can shit on her >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave e becomes legitimately a that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back whatever gif Next day ves the next morning, so this was our last in San Francisco >We deci o go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker e decided not to spend much) >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff Anonymous (D: ECBuhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040 >Cont. >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing We get back to the Hotel Apparently the chil Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before >Friends and I have no choice but to follow Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s running with the ferocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha before ey where we met the hooker before eth head prostitut g at the groans through clenched Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation Anonymous (ID EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230 >cont. Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal likes of which no man should ever witness >Dave lets out a defe ns of liquid shit sp between his fiercly vibrating at cheeks The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion d flarps its >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscent of the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she put into shock by the force of Dave's shit ays >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass s exposed to the breeze Holy fuck I've ed her >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b halo quickly pulls pants back up, and sprint away >Sti hat happened to that h
Apparently, Asian, and Chill: File: hook
 86 KB, 620x465
 Anonymous (D: K8UhFLQ
 0/28/14Tue)23:29:45 No.576373696
 Story time /b/
 be me
 pring b
 decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros
 >I had this one buddy
 we
 call him Dave
 Dave was a fucking wildcard
 this dude would do just about anything for a laugh
 >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight
 Go clubbing every night,
 ng the time of ou
 Eventually
 p was coming to a close, and
 only had a couple mi
 days left in San Fran
 de to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
 After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated
 Finally decide to
 der back to our hotel for the night
 Begin to stumble back to the hotel, ha
 g a great fucking
 We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker
 We are not
 interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
 As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that l'll never be able to forget
 bet
 h of you boys
 that you c
 of my friend
 Hooker takes us
 alley, then proceeds to lay d
 n with her
 Anonymous (D: eKBUhFLO 10/28 14(Tue)23:30:33 No.576373816
 576374049
 Okay try to shit on my face
 Dave goes first.
 >Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare a
 he's about to pinch a log off onto this
 eth addi
 d, she blows on his ass
 >Asshol
 dehydrated
 My turn next
 >I stand over her face, knowing that my ten do
 s at stake
 >l squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log s
 g within me
 had gained confidence, this was my shining momen
 the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the pros
 e's mouth and instantly closed the
 gates of my sphincter
 iled before me, I was unns
 r proceeds to do the same
 one of us can shit
 on her
 >Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our journey back to the hotel defeated
 >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
 e becomes legitimately a
 that he wasn't able to shit on the hookers face
 Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
 whatever gif
 Next day
 ves the next morning, so this
 was our last in San Francisco
 >We deci
 o go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker
 e decided not to spend
 much)
 >Find this nasty Tchinese" buffet
 Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
 Anonymous (D: ECBuhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:32:03 No. 576374040
 >Cont.
 >Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
 We get back
 to the Hotel
 Apparently the chil
 Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
 >Friends and I have no choice but to follow
 Dave doubles over in stomach pain, s
 running with the ferocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey
 >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster tha
 before
 ey where we met the hooker before
 eth head prostitut
 g at the
 groans through clenched
 Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position
 >Dave stands over her face as
 I remain transfixed with anticipation
 Anonymous (ID
 EKBUhFLO) 10/28/14 (Tue)23:33:13 No.576374230
 >cont.
 Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal
 likes of which no man should ever witness
 >Dave lets out a defe
 ns of liquid shit sp
 between his fiercly vibrating at
 cheeks
 The hookers screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet
 cover her face and
 chest
 The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open
 Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
 d flarps its
 >The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe
 in shit, with a smell reminiscent of the prison cells in Auschwitz
 >She's not even moving anymore, she
 put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
 ays
 >Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face, bare ass s
 exposed to the breeze
 Holy fuck I've
 ed her
 >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque b
 halo
 quickly pulls
 pants back up, and
 sprint away
 >Sti
 hat happened to that h
America, Bad, and Beautiful: PARODY cited Cabinet Members You're Gonna Totally Love! Making America More Like Me Loser Countries Can Bomb the T out of!! President Bines My The Assent to Power "It's Just Busin THERE CAME THE DAY, as a young man, when I felt myself growing stronger, gaining power a getting the first inkling that I could be m world. I read everything I could understand my about the great men of history, the men who changed everything. They all had a few ke in common: They were pure of heart, the were clear of vision, and they knew that they need be surrounded by the right people, to times even if some they would have to eliminate a few lesser individuals along the way. I felt myself growing stronger, gaining power and getting the first inkling that I could be master of my world. Other Stuff Countries with two or more strikes against them At the first morning briefing with the President following the election discussed the day's schedule and the s policy initiatives that I will atte to interpret and somehow translate into cogent press releases. On this occasion however, in an effort to be, in his words, "more intimate with my people, President Elect Trump made me release his thoughts of the day verbatim. White House Press Secretary Salinger IV think they'd learn something in a couple of hundred Scotland years. And h a bunch of ng in here. There hasn't been a damn thin eting Here's the d Klan members in whit guys dressed up like Klu Klucks happening on this disaster of an and for as long as sheets with black dough s on their heads. They don y back to that Me all the anybody can remember ook alike, so how do you say a damn thing and they a nce my mother Gibson movie with the blue faces. B know who to impress? But when it comes time to buy was Scottish and Icare deeply for these poor people, I their four-wheel-drive Cadillacs and their mile-long skirts and the fucking thought. "Let's lose the wool e launchers, who do they come yachts with m bagpipes, put big boy pants on them and bring them into crawling to? The U.S. of fucking A. The only reason ay to do that was the 21st century." Now the obvious these guys are worth sparing is because they snap up o build the finest golf course in history with a very, very 75-million-dollar penthouses as fast as I can build them nice shop where they could sell their whiskey. So I poke to some authorities on whiskey and golf, and London, Britain very one of them agreed that my plan would literally How do you expect anybody to take you seriously when ave the nation and create 41,000 jobs. Next, I put a the whole country looks like it has meth-mouth? Also er deal together to buy a mile of mud along the coas those hair hats they wear in court (and they talk about my build the Trump International Hebrides (See? I know hair?) make all their po cians and lawyers look like geography and stuff!) Upmarket Golf Course & they're in a remake of Mi y on the Bounty. But all tha rit Shoppe. And what do they do? They shun me, a ke mutton. And I also don aside, I don ke the fac ve son. They put up giant windmills within the view that there are more Muslims in London than soldiers in y clubhouse and wrecked the whole thing. Two he British Army-an army, by the way, that still ha s and a foul tip wooden wheels on their tanks and soldiers tha ia e dance when you say "ha that dopey cockeyed threat of banning me from showing up over one, who's gonna trust a place where the women here was squashed when I told them I'd send my round wrapped up like burn victims? And I don d. It scuffs up my Trump Dealmaster llama he best tooth man in the world, according to an dentis hoes. The whole place is irritating. I also don o straighten out those disasters they n-house po atching camels spitting on tourists he city and whole country are on s disgusting speak through. S s place has been around since the Bible-you'd probation for the foreseeable future pTIME headed over, no bomb. It's this kind of thinking by a cost-conscious leader that separates me France going for it that I can s in France has one thing seams, like The women wear real stockings with very, ver Casablanca. However, I did notice a lot of from all previous Presidents in American history Mexico pain-in-the-asshola mess Here's the whole Mexican, long, very black leg hair visible through those wrapped up in a burrito that's easy for anyone to stockings, and when you combine that with the rip armpits in the summer, it's easy to see why they invented perfume and cheese. I made a killing from me and the whole place is as flat as a quesadilla. two More shorting deodorant last year. The other thing bringing very smart. First, I'm gonna stop up that flushing to called the border with the most beautiful wall since them down is that the men are extremely tiny. A French double extra-large men's shirt would be tight on a China or that crying one in Israel. This wall will be hree-year-old. The wine's OK, but I make way better wine at Chateau Neuf de Trump in Atlantic City. A we really have to do here is stop the flow of Jerry way to launder their cash, and I won Lewis DVDs-that'll be punishment enough them a le the construction plans oo closely for tunnels in Russia bombing Here's why we don't have to worry about same amount of drugs comin he Rooskies. If the Russians ever get pissed-or drunk guys on Wall Street we need them n and l don't have enough-to e launch button, I'll tell you exactly What will happen: A six-foot-long cardboard "missile land powered by a Roman candle w ravel 150 feet and o n a glass of vodka. The e whole country will go War's no rapists! A total win hagina Bang Bang in North deserving targe strike, get hammered and sickled, and pass out TrumpTIME HUMOR & PARODY Well, now you've gone and done it, America. You've elected Donald K Trump President and the US willnever again be the same! Follow President-Elect Trump on his historic, world altering journey from the cradle to The Donald to the Oval Office The problem for all of us is that he's got plans, lots of them, and the list reads like a bad acid trip Pardoning, and nominating, Bernie Madoff for Secretary of the Treasury "Trumpifying" the Constitution Repainting the White House using 570 gallons of "Trump Highest-Gloss Aryan-Blond Exterior" Making real estate deals in Syria with pal Vladimir Putin Seizing control of one of America's great news publications The list goes on and on In this "inaugural" (and whollyfictitious issue of TrumpTI Magazine President-Elect Trump promises to re-make America in his own image Don't like it? Move to Canada, losers! This book is a parody and has not been prepared, annround Found this in the comedy section of a bookstore in Australia
America, Bad, and Beautiful: PARODY
 cited
 Cabinet
 Members
 You're Gonna
 Totally Love!
 Making
 America
 More Like Me
 Loser
 Countries
 Can Bomb
 the T out of!!
 President

 Bines
 My The Assent to Power
 "It's Just Busin
 THERE CAME THE DAY, as a young man, when
 I felt myself growing stronger, gaining power a
 getting the first inkling that I could be m
 world. I read everything I could understand
 my about the great men of history, the men
 who
 changed everything. They all had a few
 ke
 in common: They were pure of heart, the
 were
 clear of vision, and they knew that they need
 be surrounded by the right people, to
 times even if some
 they would have to eliminate a few lesser
 individuals along the way.
 I felt myself growing stronger,
 gaining power and getting the
 first inkling that I could be
 master of my world.

 Other Stuff
 Countries with two or more
 strikes against them
 At the first morning briefing with the President following the election
 discussed the day's schedule and the s policy initiatives that I will atte
 to
 interpret and somehow translate into cogent press
 releases. On this occasion
 however, in an effort to be, in his words, "more intimate with my people, President
 Elect Trump made me release his thoughts of the day verbatim.
 White House Press Secretary Salinger IV
 think they'd learn something in a
 couple of hundred
 Scotland
 years. And
 h a bunch of
 ng in
 here. There hasn't been a damn thin
 eting
 Here's the d
 Klan members in whit
 guys dressed up like Klu Klucks happening on this disaster of an
 and for as long as
 sheets with black dough
 s on their heads. They don
 y back to that Me
 all the
 anybody can remember
 ook alike, so how do you
 say a damn thing and they a
 nce my mother
 Gibson movie with the blue faces. B
 know who to impress? But when it comes time to buy
 was Scottish and Icare deeply for these poor people, I
 their four-wheel-drive Cadillacs and their mile-long
 skirts and the fucking
 thought. "Let's lose the wool e launchers, who do they come
 yachts with m
 bagpipes, put big boy pants on them and bring them into
 crawling to? The U.S. of fucking A. The only reason
 ay to do that was
 the 21st century." Now the obvious
 these guys are worth sparing is because they snap up
 o build the finest golf course in history with a very, very
 75-million-dollar penthouses as fast as I can build them
 nice shop where they could sell their whiskey. So I
 poke to some authorities on whiskey and golf, and
 London, Britain
 very one of them agreed that my plan would literally
 How do you expect anybody to take you seriously when
 ave the nation and create 41,000 jobs. Next, I put a
 the whole country looks like it has meth-mouth? Also
 er deal together to buy a mile of mud along the coas
 those hair hats they wear in court (and they talk about my
 build the Trump International Hebrides (See? I know
 hair?) make all their po
 cians and lawyers look like
 geography and stuff!) Upmarket Golf Course &
 they're in a remake of Mi
 y on the Bounty. But all tha
 rit Shoppe. And what do they do? They shun me, a
 ke mutton. And I also don
 aside, I don
 ke the fac
 ve son. They put up giant windmills within the view
 that there are more Muslims in London than soldiers in
 y clubhouse and wrecked the whole thing. Two
 he British Army-an army, by the way, that still ha
 s and a foul tip
 wooden wheels on their tanks and soldiers tha
 ia
 e dance when you say "ha
 that dopey
 cockeyed threat of banning me from showing up over
 one, who's gonna trust a place where the women
 here was squashed when I told them I'd send my
 round wrapped up like burn victims? And I don
 d. It scuffs up my Trump Dealmaster llama
 he best tooth man in the world, according to an
 dentis
 hoes. The whole place is irritating. I also don
 o straighten out those disasters they
 n-house po
 atching camels spitting on tourists
 he city and whole country are on
 s disgusting
 speak through. S
 s place has been around since the Bible-you'd
 probation for the foreseeable future
 pTIME
 headed
 over, no bomb. It's this kind of thinking by a cost-conscious leader that separates me
 France
 going for it that I can s
 in
 France has one thing seams, like The women wear real stockings with very, ver
 Casablanca. However, I did notice a lot of from all previous Presidents in American history
 Mexico
 pain-in-the-asshola mess
 Here's the whole Mexican, long, very black leg hair visible through those
 wrapped up in a burrito that's easy for anyone to
 stockings, and when you combine that with the rip
 armpits in the summer, it's easy to see why they
 invented perfume
 and cheese. I made a killing
 from me and the whole place is as flat as a quesadilla.
 two More
 shorting deodorant last year. The other thing bringing
 very smart. First, I'm gonna stop up that flushing to
 called the border with the most beautiful wall since
 them down is that the men are extremely tiny. A French
 double extra-large men's shirt would be tight on a
 China or that crying one in Israel. This wall will be
 hree-year-old. The wine's OK, but I make way better
 wine at Chateau Neuf de Trump in Atlantic City. A
 we really have to do here is stop the flow of Jerry
 way to launder their cash, and I won
 Lewis DVDs-that'll be punishment enough
 them a le
 the construction plans
 oo closely for tunnels in Russia
 bombing
 Here's why we don't have to worry about same amount of drugs comin
 he Rooskies. If the Russians ever get pissed-or drunk
 guys on Wall Street
 we need them
 n and l don't have
 enough-to
 e launch button, I'll tell you exactly
 What will happen: A six-foot-long cardboard "missile
 land
 powered by a Roman candle w
 ravel 150 feet and o
 n a glass of vodka. The
 e whole country will go War's
 no rapists! A total win
 hagina Bang Bang in North
 deserving targe
 strike, get hammered and sickled, and pass out
 TrumpTIME

 HUMOR & PARODY
 Well, now you've gone and done it, America. You've elected
 Donald K Trump President and the US willnever again be the same!
 Follow President-Elect Trump on his historic,
 world altering journey from the cradle
 to The Donald to the Oval Office
 The problem for all of us is that he's got plans, lots of them, and the list
 reads like a bad acid trip
 Pardoning, and nominating, Bernie Madoff for
 Secretary of the Treasury
 "Trumpifying" the Constitution
 Repainting the White House using 570 gallons of "Trump
 Highest-Gloss Aryan-Blond Exterior"
 Making real estate deals in Syria with pal Vladimir Putin
 Seizing control of one of America's great news publications
 The list goes on and on
 In this "inaugural" (and
 whollyfictitious issue of TrumpTI
 Magazine
 President-Elect Trump promises to
 re-make America in his own image
 Don't like it? Move to Canada, losers!
 This book is a parody and has not been prepared, annround
Found this in the comedy section of a bookstore in Australia

Found this in the comedy section of a bookstore in Australia

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