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    Memes, Beach, and Bible: LAD
 BIBLE
The way the wind hits the ceiling at this beach bar 😍😍 . . @journeygreece x @theluxurycollection x @romanoscostanavarino x @levanterman
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Memes, Beach, and Bible: LAD
 BIBLE
The way the wind hits the ceiling at this beach bar 😍😍 . . @journeygreece x @theluxurycollection x @romanoscostanavarino x @levanterman
                
                

                
            

            
            
The way the wind hits the ceiling at this beach bar 😍😍 . . @journeygreece x @theluxurycollection x @romanoscostanavarino x @levanterman

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Being Alone, Ass, and Assassination: HI... I'M I'M VERY GLAD
 FRANKLIN.. TO KNOW yOU
 I )
 OPNTS
<p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176535484178/brett-caton-atomicsalmon-brett-caton" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176509323667/atomicsalmon-brett-caton-atomicsalmon" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176489965878/brett-caton-atomicsalmon-brett-caton" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176488525882/atomicsalmon-brett-caton-libertarirynn" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176487882003/brett-caton-libertarirynn-on-july-31-1968" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176468087807/libertarirynn-on-july-31-1968-a-young-black" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://libertarirynn.tumblr.com/post/176420298534/on-july-31-1968-a-young-black-man-was-reading" class="tumblr_blog">libertarirynn</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>β€œOn July 31, 1968, a young, black man was reading the newspaper when he saw something that he had never seen before. With tears in his eyes, he started running and screaming throughout the house, calling for his mom. He would show his mom, and, she would gasp, seeing something she thought she would never see in her lifetime. Throughout the nation, there were similar reactions.</p>

<p>What they saw was Franklin Armstrong’s first appearance on the iconic comic strip β€œPeanuts.” Franklin would be 50 years old this year.</p>

<p>Franklin was β€œborn” after a school teacher, Harriet Glickman, had written a letter to creator Charles M. Schulz after Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was shot to death outside his Memphis hotel room. </p>

<p>Glickman, who had kids of her own and having worked with kids, was especially aware of the power of comics among the young. β€œAnd my feeling at the time was that I realized that black kids and white kids never saw themselves [depicted] together in the classroom,” she would say. </p>

<p>She would write, β€œSince the death of Martin Luther King, β€˜I’ve been asking myself what I can do to help change those conditions in our society which led to the assassination and which contribute to the vast sea of misunderstanding, hate, fear and violence.β€˜β€</p>

<p>Glickman asked Schulz if he could consider adding a black character to his popular comic strip, which she hoped would bring the country together and show people of color that they are not excluded from American society. </p>

<p>She had written to others as well, but the others feared it was too soon, that it may be costly to their careers, that the syndicate would drop them if they dared do something like that.</p>

<p>Charles Schulz did not have to respond to her letter, he could have just completely ignored it, and everyone would have forgotten about it. But, Schulz did take the time to respond, saying he was intrigued with the idea, but wasn’t sure whether it would be right, coming from him, he didn’t want to make matters worse, he felt that it may sound condescending to people of color.</p>

<p>Glickman did not give up, and continued communicating with Schulz, with Schulz surprisingly responding each time. She would even have black friends write to Schulz and explain to him what it would mean to them and gave him some suggestions on how to introduce such a character without offending anyone. This conversation would continue until one day, Schulz would tell Glickman to check her newspaper on July 31, 1968.</p>

<p>On that date, the cartoon, as created by Schulz, shows Charlie Brown meeting a new character, named Franklin. Other than his color, Franklin was just an ordinary kid who befriends and helps Charlie Brown. Franklin also mentions that his father was β€œover at Vietnam.” At the end of the series, which lasted three strips, Charlie invites Franklin to spend the night one day so they can continue their friendship.</p>

<p>There was no big announcement, there was no big deal, it was just a natural conversation between two kids, whose obvious differences did not matter to them. And, the fact that Franklin’s father was fighting for this country was also a very strong statement by Schulz.</p>

<p>Although Schulz never made a big deal over the inclusion of Franklin, there were many fans, especially in the South, who were very upset by it and that made national news. One Southern editor even said, β€œI don’t mind you having a black character, but please don’t show them in school together.”</p>

<p>It would eventually lead to a conversation between Schulz and the president of the comic’s distribution company, who was concerned about the introduction of Franklin and how it might affect Schulz’ popularity. Many newspapers during that time had threatened to cut the strip.</p>

<p>Schulz’ response: β€œI remember telling Larry at the time about Franklin – he wanted me to change it, and we talked about it for a long while on the phone, and I finally sighed and said, β€œWell, Larry, let’s put it this way: Either you print it just the way I draw it or I quit. How’s that?”</p>

<p>Eventually, Franklin became a regular character in the comic strips, and, despite complaints, Franklin would be shown sitting in front of Peppermint Patty at school and playing center field on her baseball team. </p>

<p>More recently, Franklin is brought up on social media around Thanksgiving time, when the animated 1973 special β€œA Charlie Brown Thanksgiving” appears. Some people have blamed Schulz for showing Franklin sitting alone on the Thanksgiving table, while the other characters sit across him. But, Schulz did not have the same control over the animated cartoon on a television network that he did on his own comic strip in the newspapers.</p>

<p>But, he did have control over his own comic strip, and, he courageously decided to make a statement because of one brave school teacher who decided to ask a simple question.</p>

<p>Glickman would explain later that her parents were β€œconcerned about others, and the values that they instilled in us about caring for and appreciating everyone of all colors and backgrounds β€” this is what we knew when we were growing up, that you cared about other people … And so, during the years, we were very aware of the issues of racism and civil rights in this country [when] black people had to sit at the back of the bus, black people couldn’t sit in the same seats in the restaurants that you could sit … Every day I would see, or read, about black children trying to get into school and seeing crowds of white people standing around spitting at them or yelling at them … and the beatings and the dogs and the hosings and the courage of so many people in that time.”</p>

<p>Because of Glickman, because of Schulz, people around the world were introduced to a little boy named Franklin.” (Source: The Jon S. Randal Peace Page, Facebook)</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Of course, nowadays one of the characters would suddenly be black, another would be transexual, and all the girls would be quasi lesbians at least. :P</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Diversity isn’t bad, but using an outdated term for transgender people is. </p>
<p>Please do NOT use transsexual. </p>
</blockquote>
<p>β€œ
using an outdated term for transgender people is

β€œ<br/><br/>Who appointed you to the language police?<br/><br/>Trans <b>gender</b> doesn’t make sense, since gender is the psychological depiction of biological sex. A transsexual is someone whose brain doesn’t align with the body. They experience gender dysphoria, they don’t flip genders because it’s Thursday.<br/><br/>β€œ
Diversity isn’t bad

β€œ<br/><br/>Bullshit. <i>Diversity </i>as it is used now is the opposite of what it used to <i>be</i>. Every story has to be the <b>same </b>because <i>diversity?</i> That’s some Animal Farm levels of crap. <br/><br/><a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrlzSqLSGj8GIOeT5jrQsJA/videos">https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrlzSqLSGj8GIOeT5jrQsJA/videos</a><br/><br/></p>
</blockquote>

<p>1. Trans people themselves would rather people use transgender, regardless of whether or not it makes sense.</p>
<p>2. Kek, I never said every story has to be the same because of diversity, you’re just pulling shit out of your ass.</p>
<p>Diversity isn’t bad. It’s not going to kill you if there’s a story featuring someone that is gay, trans, disabled, of color, or anything else outside of what people usually choose to depict.</p>
<p>It’s not that hard a concept to understand. If you get heated over there being diversity then you need to check yourself and your beliefs.</p>
<p>Forced diversity is understandable to dislike, but I wasn’t even talking about that in the first place. I said a general statement. </p>
</blockquote>
<p>β€œ
Trans people themselves would rather people use transgender

β€œ<br/><br/>And your proof is.. your opinion. Dismissed as easily. I’ve known transsexuals all my life, they used the word, that is where i heard it, I don’t care that your little group of 0.0001% of the english speakers want to control how english is spoken, any more than I care how scientologists want it to be spoken.<br/><br/>Authoritarians try to control minds by controlling words. It’s very revealing to read books like 1984. SocJus fits in perfectly to that world.<br/><br/>β€œ
I never said every story has to be the same because of diversity

β€œ<br/><br/>And I never said you did. God, strawmannery already? I said β€˜diversity’ makes every story the same. You have to have the trans, you have to have the black person, the gay, blah blah blah. Art has to serve the needs of the ideology, not the audience, in the SocJus worldview.<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="1078" data-orig-width="881"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/4d0465e9b6c0eee84fa8ff9bf3e14229/tumblr_inline_pcrreh11Tt1qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="1078" data-orig-width="881"/></figure><p><a href="http://brettcaton.blogspot.com/2018/04/has-squirrel-girl-acquired-downs.html">Which results in… that.</a><br/><br/>β€œ
Diversity isn’t bad.

β€œ<br/><br/>By that same logic, having every story push communism or fascism isn’t bad. I disagree.<br/><br/>β€œ
 It’s not going to kill you

β€œ<br/><br/>Bullshit. But even by that same bar, neither is pushing stories that talk about pushing transsexuals into gas chambers. Is that really the standard of morality you ascribe to? Something is acceptable if it won’t kill<i> you?</i><br/><br/>β€œ
It’s not that hard a concept to understand. 

β€œ<br/><br/>I understand it perfectly, just as I understand the claims of all sorts of religions and ideologies.<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="546" data-orig-width="728"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ec0315ffbc32535d8b176e33bc0a4599/tumblr_inline_pcrrlfOi931qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="546" data-orig-width="728"/></figure><p>There is something you - along with so many other fanatics do not comprehend. There are people who do not believe the same things you do, despite understanding your arguments. You cannot comprehend the idea that you may be…<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="2592" data-orig-width="3888"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/287067269a75c067af2f0325ca17e5e7/tumblr_inline_pcrrnh1mG01qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="2592" data-orig-width="3888"/></figure></blockquote>

<p>Lol have you ever tried to chill? You should try it sometime, you look like you’re desperate for it. </p></blockquote>

<p>Why in the hell did a post about Peanuts turn into this shitshow?</p>
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, Ass, and Assassination: HI... I'M I'M VERY GLAD
 FRANKLIN.. TO KNOW yOU
 I )
 OPNTS
<p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176535484178/brett-caton-atomicsalmon-brett-caton" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176509323667/atomicsalmon-brett-caton-atomicsalmon" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176489965878/brett-caton-atomicsalmon-brett-caton" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176488525882/atomicsalmon-brett-caton-libertarirynn" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176487882003/brett-caton-libertarirynn-on-july-31-1968" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://brett-caton.tumblr.com/post/176468087807/libertarirynn-on-july-31-1968-a-young-black" class="tumblr_blog">brett-caton</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://libertarirynn.tumblr.com/post/176420298534/on-july-31-1968-a-young-black-man-was-reading" class="tumblr_blog">libertarirynn</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>β€œOn July 31, 1968, a young, black man was reading the newspaper when he saw something that he had never seen before. With tears in his eyes, he started running and screaming throughout the house, calling for his mom. He would show his mom, and, she would gasp, seeing something she thought she would never see in her lifetime. Throughout the nation, there were similar reactions.</p>

<p>What they saw was Franklin Armstrong’s first appearance on the iconic comic strip β€œPeanuts.” Franklin would be 50 years old this year.</p>

<p>Franklin was β€œborn” after a school teacher, Harriet Glickman, had written a letter to creator Charles M. Schulz after Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was shot to death outside his Memphis hotel room. </p>

<p>Glickman, who had kids of her own and having worked with kids, was especially aware of the power of comics among the young. β€œAnd my feeling at the time was that I realized that black kids and white kids never saw themselves [depicted] together in the classroom,” she would say. </p>

<p>She would write, β€œSince the death of Martin Luther King, β€˜I’ve been asking myself what I can do to help change those conditions in our society which led to the assassination and which contribute to the vast sea of misunderstanding, hate, fear and violence.β€˜β€</p>

<p>Glickman asked Schulz if he could consider adding a black character to his popular comic strip, which she hoped would bring the country together and show people of color that they are not excluded from American society. </p>

<p>She had written to others as well, but the others feared it was too soon, that it may be costly to their careers, that the syndicate would drop them if they dared do something like that.</p>

<p>Charles Schulz did not have to respond to her letter, he could have just completely ignored it, and everyone would have forgotten about it. But, Schulz did take the time to respond, saying he was intrigued with the idea, but wasn’t sure whether it would be right, coming from him, he didn’t want to make matters worse, he felt that it may sound condescending to people of color.</p>

<p>Glickman did not give up, and continued communicating with Schulz, with Schulz surprisingly responding each time. She would even have black friends write to Schulz and explain to him what it would mean to them and gave him some suggestions on how to introduce such a character without offending anyone. This conversation would continue until one day, Schulz would tell Glickman to check her newspaper on July 31, 1968.</p>

<p>On that date, the cartoon, as created by Schulz, shows Charlie Brown meeting a new character, named Franklin. Other than his color, Franklin was just an ordinary kid who befriends and helps Charlie Brown. Franklin also mentions that his father was β€œover at Vietnam.” At the end of the series, which lasted three strips, Charlie invites Franklin to spend the night one day so they can continue their friendship.</p>

<p>There was no big announcement, there was no big deal, it was just a natural conversation between two kids, whose obvious differences did not matter to them. And, the fact that Franklin’s father was fighting for this country was also a very strong statement by Schulz.</p>

<p>Although Schulz never made a big deal over the inclusion of Franklin, there were many fans, especially in the South, who were very upset by it and that made national news. One Southern editor even said, β€œI don’t mind you having a black character, but please don’t show them in school together.”</p>

<p>It would eventually lead to a conversation between Schulz and the president of the comic’s distribution company, who was concerned about the introduction of Franklin and how it might affect Schulz’ popularity. Many newspapers during that time had threatened to cut the strip.</p>

<p>Schulz’ response: β€œI remember telling Larry at the time about Franklin – he wanted me to change it, and we talked about it for a long while on the phone, and I finally sighed and said, β€œWell, Larry, let’s put it this way: Either you print it just the way I draw it or I quit. How’s that?”</p>

<p>Eventually, Franklin became a regular character in the comic strips, and, despite complaints, Franklin would be shown sitting in front of Peppermint Patty at school and playing center field on her baseball team. </p>

<p>More recently, Franklin is brought up on social media around Thanksgiving time, when the animated 1973 special β€œA Charlie Brown Thanksgiving” appears. Some people have blamed Schulz for showing Franklin sitting alone on the Thanksgiving table, while the other characters sit across him. But, Schulz did not have the same control over the animated cartoon on a television network that he did on his own comic strip in the newspapers.</p>

<p>But, he did have control over his own comic strip, and, he courageously decided to make a statement because of one brave school teacher who decided to ask a simple question.</p>

<p>Glickman would explain later that her parents were β€œconcerned about others, and the values that they instilled in us about caring for and appreciating everyone of all colors and backgrounds β€” this is what we knew when we were growing up, that you cared about other people … And so, during the years, we were very aware of the issues of racism and civil rights in this country [when] black people had to sit at the back of the bus, black people couldn’t sit in the same seats in the restaurants that you could sit … Every day I would see, or read, about black children trying to get into school and seeing crowds of white people standing around spitting at them or yelling at them … and the beatings and the dogs and the hosings and the courage of so many people in that time.”</p>

<p>Because of Glickman, because of Schulz, people around the world were introduced to a little boy named Franklin.” (Source: The Jon S. Randal Peace Page, Facebook)</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Of course, nowadays one of the characters would suddenly be black, another would be transexual, and all the girls would be quasi lesbians at least. :P</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Diversity isn’t bad, but using an outdated term for transgender people is. </p>
<p>Please do NOT use transsexual. </p>
</blockquote>
<p>β€œ
using an outdated term for transgender people is

β€œ<br/><br/>Who appointed you to the language police?<br/><br/>Trans <b>gender</b> doesn’t make sense, since gender is the psychological depiction of biological sex. A transsexual is someone whose brain doesn’t align with the body. They experience gender dysphoria, they don’t flip genders because it’s Thursday.<br/><br/>β€œ
Diversity isn’t bad

β€œ<br/><br/>Bullshit. <i>Diversity </i>as it is used now is the opposite of what it used to <i>be</i>. Every story has to be the <b>same </b>because <i>diversity?</i> That’s some Animal Farm levels of crap. <br/><br/><a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrlzSqLSGj8GIOeT5jrQsJA/videos">https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrlzSqLSGj8GIOeT5jrQsJA/videos</a><br/><br/></p>
</blockquote>

<p>1. Trans people themselves would rather people use transgender, regardless of whether or not it makes sense.</p>
<p>2. Kek, I never said every story has to be the same because of diversity, you’re just pulling shit out of your ass.</p>
<p>Diversity isn’t bad. It’s not going to kill you if there’s a story featuring someone that is gay, trans, disabled, of color, or anything else outside of what people usually choose to depict.</p>
<p>It’s not that hard a concept to understand. If you get heated over there being diversity then you need to check yourself and your beliefs.</p>
<p>Forced diversity is understandable to dislike, but I wasn’t even talking about that in the first place. I said a general statement. </p>
</blockquote>
<p>β€œ
Trans people themselves would rather people use transgender

β€œ<br/><br/>And your proof is.. your opinion. Dismissed as easily. I’ve known transsexuals all my life, they used the word, that is where i heard it, I don’t care that your little group of 0.0001% of the english speakers want to control how english is spoken, any more than I care how scientologists want it to be spoken.<br/><br/>Authoritarians try to control minds by controlling words. It’s very revealing to read books like 1984. SocJus fits in perfectly to that world.<br/><br/>β€œ
I never said every story has to be the same because of diversity

β€œ<br/><br/>And I never said you did. God, strawmannery already? I said β€˜diversity’ makes every story the same. You have to have the trans, you have to have the black person, the gay, blah blah blah. Art has to serve the needs of the ideology, not the audience, in the SocJus worldview.<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="1078" data-orig-width="881"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/4d0465e9b6c0eee84fa8ff9bf3e14229/tumblr_inline_pcrreh11Tt1qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="1078" data-orig-width="881"/></figure><p><a href="http://brettcaton.blogspot.com/2018/04/has-squirrel-girl-acquired-downs.html">Which results in… that.</a><br/><br/>β€œ
Diversity isn’t bad.

β€œ<br/><br/>By that same logic, having every story push communism or fascism isn’t bad. I disagree.<br/><br/>β€œ
 It’s not going to kill you

β€œ<br/><br/>Bullshit. But even by that same bar, neither is pushing stories that talk about pushing transsexuals into gas chambers. Is that really the standard of morality you ascribe to? Something is acceptable if it won’t kill<i> you?</i><br/><br/>β€œ
It’s not that hard a concept to understand. 

β€œ<br/><br/>I understand it perfectly, just as I understand the claims of all sorts of religions and ideologies.<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="546" data-orig-width="728"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ec0315ffbc32535d8b176e33bc0a4599/tumblr_inline_pcrrlfOi931qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="546" data-orig-width="728"/></figure><p>There is something you - along with so many other fanatics do not comprehend. There are people who do not believe the same things you do, despite understanding your arguments. You cannot comprehend the idea that you may be…<br/><br/><br/></p><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="2592" data-orig-width="3888"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/287067269a75c067af2f0325ca17e5e7/tumblr_inline_pcrrnh1mG01qj6ut1_540.jpg" data-orig-height="2592" data-orig-width="3888"/></figure></blockquote>

<p>Lol have you ever tried to chill? You should try it sometime, you look like you’re desperate for it. </p></blockquote>

<p>Why in the hell did a post about Peanuts turn into this shitshow?</p>
                
            

            
            
<p><a href="https://atomicsalmon.tumblr.com/post/176535484178/brett-caton-atomicsalmon-brett-caton" class="tumblr_blog">atomicsalmon</a>:</p...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Bad, Bitch, and Chihuahua: Highlights
 Always willing to make a rain
 Laughs at medioore jokers
 . I play s different instrument
 . Turned my recorder into a fully functional obacco po
 Very optimistic when hungover
 Friendship bracelets
 Can drive a stick shift
 I got bars
 Iget along with overy dog rve met and at a 73% oftro people rve moc.
 *
 Downsides
 Will be late nearly every day with iterally no excuse
 Will spook the customers with
 I have ADHD, but don't worry, I buy other peoples adderall
 Allergic to mushrooms (still willing to trip them)
 .I have been the cause of 13 car accidents (that I know ofy
 . Kind of bad at doing accents, usually just comes off as disrespecttuil
 Contributions
 Inventor
 Sauce Boss
 . A safe space and secure area for your sauces in the car.
 For a spill and worry free drive home
 . Part the Red Sea
 .The thick, untamed, poofy, distressed mane usually accompanied by a Mo
 Moses Tampons
 Coined the phrase "jean skirt hair
 mon in a floor length jean skirt
 Coined the term *Escobars
 When someone snorts a mix of cocaine and Xanax
 .Not recommended
 Education
 Bradford Elementary School
 Made it to round 1 of the 6th grade spelling bee
 Mullen High School 2008-2012
 .
 Graduated 1st place in worst attendance in class of 2012
 .

 Dia
 though
 Had an impact on the student handbook because I rode a donkey to schook
 of Northem Colorado 2012-201
 Survived Greeley
 Majored in like 7 different things so I'm well rounded
 University of the Virgin Isiands 2015-2017
 Majored in Political Science and English- Creative Whiting
 School blew away in Hurricane Irma
 School cut major
 Jobs I Didnt Quit In Less Than 3 Weeks Or Get Fired From
 Colorado Saddlery 2012-Present
 I make everyone feel good about themselves in the company because I ne
 ver know what's going on there
 They don't pay me anymore but I still show up from time to time
 . Laboniously diverse in that bitch
 . I programmed their Alexa to play the world's national anthems at noon ever
 y day
 - They pretty much can't fire me thered
 e Intenship in Haiti 2016
 Partially fluent in Haitian Creole, which I speak in when dicey fools speak to
 me at the bar and I want them to leave 4ever
 Spent about a year total in Hait
 I had Zika, so don't worry, I won't be having children any time soono
 Harley Davidson-St. Thomas
 . I folded shits, talked to drunk people, then I sold said shits to said drunk p
 eople
 I'm very impressive at folding shirts
 Reason(s) I Dipped:
 I wanted to get off the islandl over Christmas
 I kept accidentally throwing piles of clothes onto the owner's chihuahua a
 d I felt really guilty about ito
 They said I quit better than any other employee they've had, that was co
 sort of
 Local Color Clothing Boutique
 More folding, but the clothes were more expensive)
Some girl just dropped this resume off at my work
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bad, Bitch, and Chihuahua: Highlights
 Always willing to make a rain
 Laughs at medioore jokers
 . I play s different instrument
 . Turned my recorder into a fully functional obacco po
 Very optimistic when hungover
 Friendship bracelets
 Can drive a stick shift
 I got bars
 Iget along with overy dog rve met and at a 73% oftro people rve moc.
 *
 Downsides
 Will be late nearly every day with iterally no excuse
 Will spook the customers with
 I have ADHD, but don't worry, I buy other peoples adderall
 Allergic to mushrooms (still willing to trip them)
 .I have been the cause of 13 car accidents (that I know ofy
 . Kind of bad at doing accents, usually just comes off as disrespecttuil
 Contributions
 Inventor
 Sauce Boss
 . A safe space and secure area for your sauces in the car.
 For a spill and worry free drive home
 . Part the Red Sea
 .The thick, untamed, poofy, distressed mane usually accompanied by a Mo
 Moses Tampons
 Coined the phrase "jean skirt hair
 mon in a floor length jean skirt
 Coined the term *Escobars
 When someone snorts a mix of cocaine and Xanax
 .Not recommended
 Education
 Bradford Elementary School
 Made it to round 1 of the 6th grade spelling bee
 Mullen High School 2008-2012
 .
 Graduated 1st place in worst attendance in class of 2012
 .

 Dia
 though
 Had an impact on the student handbook because I rode a donkey to schook
 of Northem Colorado 2012-201
 Survived Greeley
 Majored in like 7 different things so I'm well rounded
 University of the Virgin Isiands 2015-2017
 Majored in Political Science and English- Creative Whiting
 School blew away in Hurricane Irma
 School cut major
 Jobs I Didnt Quit In Less Than 3 Weeks Or Get Fired From
 Colorado Saddlery 2012-Present
 I make everyone feel good about themselves in the company because I ne
 ver know what's going on there
 They don't pay me anymore but I still show up from time to time
 . Laboniously diverse in that bitch
 . I programmed their Alexa to play the world's national anthems at noon ever
 y day
 - They pretty much can't fire me thered
 e Intenship in Haiti 2016
 Partially fluent in Haitian Creole, which I speak in when dicey fools speak to
 me at the bar and I want them to leave 4ever
 Spent about a year total in Hait
 I had Zika, so don't worry, I won't be having children any time soono
 Harley Davidson-St. Thomas
 . I folded shits, talked to drunk people, then I sold said shits to said drunk p
 eople
 I'm very impressive at folding shirts
 Reason(s) I Dipped:
 I wanted to get off the islandl over Christmas
 I kept accidentally throwing piles of clothes onto the owner's chihuahua a
 d I felt really guilty about ito
 They said I quit better than any other employee they've had, that was co
 sort of
 Local Color Clothing Boutique
 More folding, but the clothes were more expensive)
Some girl just dropped this resume off at my work
                
            

            
            
Some girl just dropped this resume off at my work