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Ass, Beautiful, and Booty: First night at home from the shelter. Reddit u/towntown1337 @DrSmashlove People ask me “aye smash what’s your type? What do u like in a girl?” Simple - I ain’t got no type. Anyone who says I do is lyin 🦁. I mean obviously from the captions u can see that there are things I like (skretch marks...above the booty dimples...thunderous thighs 🤤 lemme stop before I get hot and bothered.) But that don’t mean I don’t like thin women. I love them too. Equally. Girl if u don’t bring ya bony lil sensual grasshopper lookin a$$ and sit on this lap ol stick figure a$$ lmao wyd tho hangman lookin a$$ u cute tho lol handful of toothpicks with good hair lookin a$$ baby stop crying I’m playin with u why u gotta punch me ol legend of the slenderman lookin a$$ baby...baby why u choking me...baby? I kinda like this keep going HAHAHAHA LEMME STOP. Anyway like I said I ain’t got no type. Thicky thicc or slenderwomanous u all splendiferous. And that’s how I feel about doggies. I ain’t got no type. I understand people like different things. I don’t even blame people who go to breeders like I got close friends that’s done it and I’m not about to lecture anybody - they want a certain retriever or husky good for them. I don’t like puppy mills in my heart but I don’t judge. But as for me bruv a ratty lil mix breed rescue dog with a high pitch bark that sound like a child aggressively coughing? With them lil ass legs that allow him or her to run 700 miles per hour bruv? I love a crazy lil rescue mutt bruv he beautiful to me. But most important YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL FOR ADOPTING HIM OR HER - U A HERO. NOT A SMALL HERO BUT A BIG HERO - BLESS U - U WONDERFUL 😍❤️ [Editor’s Note: The reference to choking was made in jest and was merely intended to create literary interest. The author is from the hood. Consequently, I have built-in danger sensors. Wrap your hands around my throat and squeeze and u gon catcheth this fade. It be the petite lil joints that always wanna scrap too - don’t none of u lil grasshoppers DM me like “let me choke u zaddy ☺️” Imma leave u on ‘Seent’ ON PRINCIPLE. BLESS YA TINY LIL A$$ UP 😂😂😂]
Ass, Beautiful, and Booty: First night at home from the shelter.
 Reddit u/towntown1337
 @DrSmashlove
People ask me “aye smash what’s your type? What do u like in a girl?” Simple - I ain’t got no type. Anyone who says I do is lyin 🦁. I mean obviously from the captions u can see that there are things I like (skretch marks...above the booty dimples...thunderous thighs 🤤 lemme stop before I get hot and bothered.) But that don’t mean I don’t like thin women. I love them too. Equally. Girl if u don’t bring ya bony lil sensual grasshopper lookin a$$ and sit on this lap ol stick figure a$$ lmao wyd tho hangman lookin a$$ u cute tho lol handful of toothpicks with good hair lookin a$$ baby stop crying I’m playin with u why u gotta punch me ol legend of the slenderman lookin a$$ baby...baby why u choking me...baby? I kinda like this keep going HAHAHAHA LEMME STOP. Anyway like I said I ain’t got no type. Thicky thicc or slenderwomanous u all splendiferous. And that’s how I feel about doggies. I ain’t got no type. I understand people like different things. I don’t even blame people who go to breeders like I got close friends that’s done it and I’m not about to lecture anybody - they want a certain retriever or husky good for them. I don’t like puppy mills in my heart but I don’t judge. But as for me bruv a ratty lil mix breed rescue dog with a high pitch bark that sound like a child aggressively coughing? With them lil ass legs that allow him or her to run 700 miles per hour bruv? I love a crazy lil rescue mutt bruv he beautiful to me. But most important YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL FOR ADOPTING HIM OR HER - U A HERO. NOT A SMALL HERO BUT A BIG HERO - BLESS U - U WONDERFUL 😍❤️ [Editor’s Note: The reference to choking was made in jest and was merely intended to create literary interest. The author is from the hood. Consequently, I have built-in danger sensors. Wrap your hands around my throat and squeeze and u gon catcheth this fade. It be the petite lil joints that always wanna scrap too - don’t none of u lil grasshoppers DM me like “let me choke u zaddy ☺️” Imma leave u on ‘Seent’ ON PRINCIPLE. BLESS YA TINY LIL A$$ UP 😂😂😂]

People ask me “aye smash what’s your type? What do u like in a girl?” Simple - I ain’t got no type. Anyone who says I do is lyin 🦁. I mean o...

Baked, Bless Up, and Booty: Saw this good boy waiting outside a bakers for his human in Rosyth, Scotland Pic: reddit u/MacSquizzy @ DrSmashlove Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the hands to the throat is the international sign for “I’m choking” (also the international sign for “choke me daddy” 😬), handing a man a container full of fresh baked cookies or fudge lets him know u felt the D in your soul 💕. Sometimes a lady will give u the cookies in plastic Tupperware. Always a wonderful touch. This says: “here is some reusable Tupperware, daddy. Remember me when you order Thai food and need somewhere to store your leftover pad Thai 😌.” But see some of u ladies wanna go the extra mile. This type of lady wanna give u them warm, chewy cookies in one of them extremely classy glass containers with a plastic lid. One of them Pyrex or Anchor Hocking joints. This ain’t just about cookies bruv. This is an entirely different statement. She giving u a high grade reusable container that u can use over and over. U can heat up some soup in there. Throw some veggies in there for an afternoon snack. U feel me? There are Myriad uses for this wondrous technology bruv. This a bold statement. She improving yo life. She saying “thank you for the pipe daddy, you upgraded my Punani, so in return I’m gonna upgrade your entire existence. I opened your fridge and saw you storing leftovers in a Cool Whip container, that’s no way to live daddy 😌 here’s something that will give your leftovers better flavor 🤗.” Bam. Now every time u use it, u think of how she low key upgraded you. Now I’m not saying u ladies owe a man this type of sweetness just for good D. Shiiiiiit u DESERVE good D! That’s off the top! A man shouldn’t be rewarded for merely performing his Duty To The Thee Booty! But if he do, and if u bequeath uponst him Thee Glassware, just know that he gon love both the cookies and the container and the fondness in his heart will only increase. A lot of these men out here was raised by wolves. If he fulfilling his duties as yo daddy, it don’t hurt to be his mommy 🤗 TheresNoHopeForOurGenerarion 😂 p.s. ALWAYS OFFER TO RETURN IT - IF SHE TAKE IT BACK, U JUST A SIDE PIECE. TEMPORARY TUPPERWARE = TEMPORARY D, BLESS UP 🤗😂
Baked, Bless Up, and Booty: Saw this good boy waiting outside a bakers for
 his human in Rosyth, Scotland
 Pic: reddit u/MacSquizzy
 @ DrSmashlove
Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the hands to the throat is the international sign for “I’m choking” (also the international sign for “choke me daddy” 😬), handing a man a container full of fresh baked cookies or fudge lets him know u felt the D in your soul 💕. Sometimes a lady will give u the cookies in plastic Tupperware. Always a wonderful touch. This says: “here is some reusable Tupperware, daddy. Remember me when you order Thai food and need somewhere to store your leftover pad Thai 😌.” But see some of u ladies wanna go the extra mile. This type of lady wanna give u them warm, chewy cookies in one of them extremely classy glass containers with a plastic lid. One of them Pyrex or Anchor Hocking joints. This ain’t just about cookies bruv. This is an entirely different statement. She giving u a high grade reusable container that u can use over and over. U can heat up some soup in there. Throw some veggies in there for an afternoon snack. U feel me? There are Myriad uses for this wondrous technology bruv. This a bold statement. She improving yo life. She saying “thank you for the pipe daddy, you upgraded my Punani, so in return I’m gonna upgrade your entire existence. I opened your fridge and saw you storing leftovers in a Cool Whip container, that’s no way to live daddy 😌 here’s something that will give your leftovers better flavor 🤗.” Bam. Now every time u use it, u think of how she low key upgraded you. Now I’m not saying u ladies owe a man this type of sweetness just for good D. Shiiiiiit u DESERVE good D! That’s off the top! A man shouldn’t be rewarded for merely performing his Duty To The Thee Booty! But if he do, and if u bequeath uponst him Thee Glassware, just know that he gon love both the cookies and the container and the fondness in his heart will only increase. A lot of these men out here was raised by wolves. If he fulfilling his duties as yo daddy, it don’t hurt to be his mommy 🤗 TheresNoHopeForOurGenerarion 😂 p.s. ALWAYS OFFER TO RETURN IT - IF SHE TAKE IT BACK, U JUST A SIDE PIECE. TEMPORARY TUPPERWARE = TEMPORARY D, BLESS UP 🤗😂

Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the han...