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College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” What do you have to do to get a scholarship? I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. this whole post I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL
College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your
 child to obey Jesus, the
 devil will teach them
 evolution, sexuality
 psychology, witchcraft
thefingerfuckingfemalefury:
fire-ghoul:

seekerofshores:

grumpyrpgreviews:

prokopetz:

cheesedeity:

prokopetz:

bear-eggs:

geekandmisandry:

Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time.
#TeamSatan

Can satan come teach a class at my school

Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers.
For example, this guy?
Teaches moral philosophy.
And this creepy dude?
He’s your astronomy professor.
Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild.

I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school.

“Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.”
“Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.”
“Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.”

What do you have to do to get a scholarship?

I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. 

this whole post

I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL

thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisand...

Butt, Chill, and Choose One: Ride Menu Choose one or more types of rides you would like today (You must be 18 years of age or older and over 4'2" tall.) The Stand-Up Ride lohn: The Lyft Driver I tell you about things I learned in prison and poor life choices I have made. Don't put a tattoo of your girlfriend on your butt. It rarely works out well. The Creepy Ride I don't say anything. I just leer at you periodically in the review mirror and lick my lips in an unpleasant, malicious or lascivious manner. The Therapy Ride Tell me about all your problems and I will pretend to care The Sympathy Ride I tell you about my problems and you pretend to care The Silent Ride The Sado-Masochistic Ride l insult you and your relatives (particularly your mother) and be as rude as I possibly can to you the whole trip. WARNING: This ride hegins by me throwing yo out of the car and making you run to catch up. The Chill Out Ride out on beautifu, qwiet classical music and you arrive at your destunation relaxed, refreshed and less likely to complain about the TSA strip search. The Gluttony Ride I recommend the best restaurants in town and warn you to stay away from the other oves ayped ones. (I will join you upon request.) The Jeopardy Ride I tell you fun facts and trivia about Nashville which will help you win game shows and amaze your friends. Hint: Ask me about "hookers Interesting Lyft ride The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)
Butt, Chill, and Choose One: Ride Menu
 Choose one or more types of rides you would like today
 (You must be 18 years of age or older and over 4'2" tall.)
 The Stand-Up Ride
 lohn: The Lyft Driver
 I tell you about things I learned in prison and poor life choices I have made.
 Don't put a tattoo of your girlfriend on your butt. It rarely works out well.
 The Creepy Ride
 I don't say anything. I just leer at you periodically in the review mirror and
 lick my lips in an unpleasant, malicious or lascivious manner.
 The Therapy Ride
 Tell me about all your problems and I will pretend to care
 The Sympathy Ride
 I tell you about my problems and you pretend to care
 The Silent Ride
 The Sado-Masochistic Ride
 l insult you and your relatives (particularly your mother) and be as rude as I
 possibly can to you the whole trip. WARNING: This ride hegins by me
 throwing yo out of the car and making you run to catch up.
 The Chill Out Ride
 out on beautifu, qwiet classical music and you arrive at your destunation
 relaxed, refreshed and less likely to complain about the TSA strip search.
 The Gluttony Ride
 I recommend the best restaurants in town and warn you to stay away from
 the other oves ayped ones. (I will join you upon request.)
 The Jeopardy Ride
 I tell you fun facts and trivia about Nashville which will help you win game
 shows and amaze your friends. Hint: Ask me about "hookers
 Interesting Lyft ride
The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)

The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)