Dreams


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    

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    Tumblr, Amethyst, and Aphrodite: 22ndandeverett:
Build your own Ritual Smoker Kit @ 22nd  Everett
Amethyst | Rose Quartz | Tigers Eye | Red Obsidian | Labradorite
Aphrodite | Wolf Mother | Sweet Dreams

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Tumblr, Amethyst, and Aphrodite: 22ndandeverett:
Build your own Ritual Smoker Kit @ 22nd  Everett
Amethyst | Rose Quartz | Tigers Eye | Red Obsidian | Labradorite
Aphrodite | Wolf Mother | Sweet Dreams

                
            

            
            
22ndandeverett:
Build your own Ritual Smoker Kit @ 22nd  Everett
Amethyst | Rose Quartz | Tigers Eye | Red Obsidian | Labradorite
Aphrodite ...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            




    Amazon, Complex, and Jeff Bezos: Dazed Jeff Bezos Realizes
 He Spent Entire Conversation
 Thinking About How To Automate
 Person Talking To Him
theonion:

SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversation thinking about how to automate the person talking to him. “Sorry, could you repeat that? I just lost focus for a second [as I indifferently watched you open and close your mouth, becoming increasingly aware of the fact that a simple machine could do the exact same things as you],” Bezos said to the Amazon vice president in front of him, even as he resumed brainstorming a complex algorithm that would streamline the executive’s duties, perform them with greater speed and efficiency, and possibly even capture some of his unique human qualities to make it user-friendly. “Whoops, there I go again. I must’ve spaced out [after realizing I could probably render you completely irrelevant within just a few years]. I guess I’m really distracted today [by the tantalizing thought of an automaton executing every one of your relevant functions for no salary with never a single complaint].” Bezos, who suddenly recalled a series of vivid dreams from the previous night in which he automated the entire American workforce, went on to apologize for not getting much sleep.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Amazon, Complex, and Jeff Bezos: Dazed Jeff Bezos Realizes
 He Spent Entire Conversation
 Thinking About How To Automate
 Person Talking To Him
theonion:

SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversation thinking about how to automate the person talking to him. “Sorry, could you repeat that? I just lost focus for a second [as I indifferently watched you open and close your mouth, becoming increasingly aware of the fact that a simple machine could do the exact same things as you],” Bezos said to the Amazon vice president in front of him, even as he resumed brainstorming a complex algorithm that would streamline the executive’s duties, perform them with greater speed and efficiency, and possibly even capture some of his unique human qualities to make it user-friendly. “Whoops, there I go again. I must’ve spaced out [after realizing I could probably render you completely irrelevant within just a few years]. I guess I’m really distracted today [by the tantalizing thought of an automaton executing every one of your relevant functions for no salary with never a single complaint].” Bezos, who suddenly recalled a series of vivid dreams from the previous night in which he automated the entire American workforce, went on to apologize for not getting much sleep.
                
            

            
            
theonion:

SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversa...