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    Amazon, Drunk, and Internet: old man bangers
 @FindusPancake
 My mum was teaching first holy
 communion class, and a kid asked her
 "How many communions do vou have
 to do before you've eaten a whole
 Jesus?"
 24/3/18, 8:48 am
 10K Retweets 35.1K Likes
sindri42:
xanderbot13:

gannayev:


spiletta42:

ragnell:

danbensen:

exxos-von-steamboldt:


ralfmaximus:

moogloogle:

ralfmaximus:


tobaeus:


ralfmaximus:

nyxetoile:


antibutch:
thats a valid question
A communion wafer, according to the internet, is about .25g. Jesus was a healthy young man, who worked manual labor and walked everywhere. The average male in Biblical times was 5′1″ and about 110 pounds so call it 50kg or 50,000 grams. So 200,000 wafers to make up a whole Jesus. At one wafer a week that’s 3846 to eat a whole Jesus at weekly communion. If you went to Mass daily you could do it in under 550 years.


1000 communion wafers from Amazon costs $15, so acquiring a Jesus load would set you back about $3000

But that’s just the body. Jesus also bade his followers to drink his blood. How much of that Jesus communion wafer supply needs to be replaced with communion wine to account for his blood, and how much of that would need to be consumed to have drunk all his blood as well?


The human body contains roughly 5 liters of blood.
Communion wine costs about $66 for a case of 12 x 750 ml bottles (9000 ml).
So half a case is 4500 ml, or close enough if Jesus was on the small side which is reasonable given what we know of the times.
Thus, Jesus’ blood would be about 6 bottles of communion wine, costing $33.


How much of his weight was his blood, now? We can bring down the wafer count. 

Osnap what an excellent question.
Water has a specific gravity of 1.0 and weighs 1kg/liter. Wine has a specific gravity if 1.5 thus weighs 1.5kg per liter.
4.5L of wine would weigh 6.75kg or about 15 pounds.
Reducing the wafer load by 6.75kg yields 43.25kg so call it 161,000 wafers or $2450 and change.

@danbensen


Full Metal Eucharist

The Unholy Union of Catholic Tumblr and Math Tumblr
This is one of those posts I will absolutely email to every pastor I know.



@garpfloyd 

If you just buy a sack of wafers, that’s just bread. To get the transubstatntiation going you need to have a priest perform the full ritual over them. By which I mean an entire Mass for every like, plateful? If you cut out the songs and use pretty short readings you could probably get one churned out every half-hour or so…

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Amazon, Drunk, and Internet: old man bangers
 @FindusPancake
 My mum was teaching first holy
 communion class, and a kid asked her
 "How many communions do vou have
 to do before you've eaten a whole
 Jesus?"
 24/3/18, 8:48 am
 10K Retweets 35.1K Likes
sindri42:
xanderbot13:

gannayev:


spiletta42:

ragnell:

danbensen:

exxos-von-steamboldt:


ralfmaximus:

moogloogle:

ralfmaximus:


tobaeus:


ralfmaximus:

nyxetoile:


antibutch:
thats a valid question
A communion wafer, according to the internet, is about .25g. Jesus was a healthy young man, who worked manual labor and walked everywhere. The average male in Biblical times was 5′1″ and about 110 pounds so call it 50kg or 50,000 grams. So 200,000 wafers to make up a whole Jesus. At one wafer a week that’s 3846 to eat a whole Jesus at weekly communion. If you went to Mass daily you could do it in under 550 years.


1000 communion wafers from Amazon costs $15, so acquiring a Jesus load would set you back about $3000

But that’s just the body. Jesus also bade his followers to drink his blood. How much of that Jesus communion wafer supply needs to be replaced with communion wine to account for his blood, and how much of that would need to be consumed to have drunk all his blood as well?


The human body contains roughly 5 liters of blood.
Communion wine costs about $66 for a case of 12 x 750 ml bottles (9000 ml).
So half a case is 4500 ml, or close enough if Jesus was on the small side which is reasonable given what we know of the times.
Thus, Jesus’ blood would be about 6 bottles of communion wine, costing $33.


How much of his weight was his blood, now? We can bring down the wafer count. 

Osnap what an excellent question.
Water has a specific gravity of 1.0 and weighs 1kg/liter. Wine has a specific gravity if 1.5 thus weighs 1.5kg per liter.
4.5L of wine would weigh 6.75kg or about 15 pounds.
Reducing the wafer load by 6.75kg yields 43.25kg so call it 161,000 wafers or $2450 and change.

@danbensen


Full Metal Eucharist

The Unholy Union of Catholic Tumblr and Math Tumblr
This is one of those posts I will absolutely email to every pastor I know.



@garpfloyd 

If you just buy a sack of wafers, that’s just bread. To get the transubstatntiation going you need to have a priest perform the full ritual over them. By which I mean an entire Mass for every like, plateful? If you cut out the songs and use pretty short readings you could probably get one churned out every half-hour or so…

                
            

            
            
sindri42:
xanderbot13:

gannayev:


spiletta42:

ragnell:

danbensen:

exxos-von-steamboldt:


ralfmaximus:

moogloogle:

ralfmaximus:


tob...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Adam Sandler, Alive, and Animals: Johnny Boy 'limbo', Marston
 Arthur More Organ
 Holland
 Hoseas Before Broseas
 swagalicious crunchy outside,
 self-deprecating chewy center
 - "how many licks does it take
 the squad's favorite disaster
 scrappy damsel
 squares up at a moment's notice
 can never seem to get their shit together to get to the center of my depression"
 goth jock dropout just wants to settle down -
 - dumbest smart person alive
 - denies being moe
 - "wanna know how I got these scars-
 wait where are you going"
 - makes 50+ post twitter threads nobody reads just needs a break
 - "Actually, correlation is not causation"
 - thinks they're charming, is actually charming
 - constantly forgets their age
 - "back in my day
 - only one who knows what
 the fuck they're talking about
 incredible artist, thinks their stuff is 'okay' still needs to shut the fuck up
 - one shot, one kill
 - "once I go viral it's over for you hoes"
 - has a 'Home Is Where The Heart Is' welcome mat-liked by practically everybody
 - productive procrastinator
 can never hold down a relationship
 - Instant Uncle, Just Add Baby
 suffers from chronic pushover syndrome "no questions, dammit, no questions"
 - jokes hit too close to home
 - Good bad influence
 - weed friend
 Make It Work
 Guy Fieri
 Will Billiamson
 Bad Santa
 -always knows what to play at a party
 - adopts everyone on sight
 - great with kids, great with animals,
 wants to hold your baby
 - scientific evidence good girls
 want bad boys
 - tsundere
 - burns salads
 - "have you eaten today"
 - owns etsy account, too busy to make anything - punches self for fun
 - professional alcoholic
 - always needs to borrow money
 - terrible drunk, never remembers
 what happened that night
 walks around the house in their underwear
 gives great hugs
 needs seven showers
 group's unexpected therapist
 patronus is secondhand embarrassment
 just wants to be part of the family
 "MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S!"*
 is the party
 cultured, well-traveled and stylish;
 made for Instagram
 - *gestures to all of you* "we need
 to do something about this"
 - always starts drama, yet always
 seems to avoid it
 bad taste in literally everything,
 banned from recommending outings
 - will always have squad's back
 iron constitution, never gets sick
 - "say that to my fucking face"
 - may seem Mad, is actually Sad
 petty
 *pulls up in drive-thru, orders single
 starts the day with horoscope readings
 - Chaotic Loyal
 black coffee, leaves

 t"
 FUCKS.EXE STOPPED WORKING 'mSorry Ms. Jackson tOh)
 Bastard Millennial
 Green Hat McGuy
 "join team chat"
 - fashionable at all times, even when
 going to the grocery store
 can't do crime if you ain't cute
 -only dates fictional men
 won't leave the house for days need
 lives on cow tales and TVTropes says they can hold their liquor
 regularly tells squad to hydrate can't actually hold their liquor
 too nice for own good
 living boke and tsukkomi routine
 to shut up yesterday
 social interaction, naps for ten years
 it's basic hygiene
 and laying beneath the stars
 -"please stop talking"
 exhausted after two minutes of
 maybe they're born with it, maybe
 soft spot for animals, slow dancing
 cooler than you
 . living proof the scariest people
 frat brotryhard nerd gem fusion
 come in the nicest packages
 graceful loser, even more graceful winner - "what day is it again"
 nobody sees clapbacks coming until it's never learned how to drive
 every day is roast session day
 - "I'll roast you, I'll roast them,
 I'll roast me fuckin' self"
 - Has never completed No Nut November
 sings in the shower
 - adores Linkin Park
 late
 - "are you ready yet" "almost"
 - allergic to idiots
 Adam Sandler
 Regina O'George
 Let Me Speak To Your Manager
 - retired mom friend, back from retirement
 ages every time someone references
 a vine instead of responding normally
 - smokes sixty packs a day
 Goof Troop
 social norms are for dweebs
 just wants to play videogames
 - No Drama? No ProblemTM
 -"Local Mean Girl Refuses To
 Be Toppled From Throne"
 - loses shit over small things
 -THIS close to cutting someone
 and snack in peace
 shoves people in lockers to show affection
 forgets not to swear in front of other
 never forgets a birthday
 shaped like a friend
 only one in squad who can cook
 only one in squad who can drive
 people's children
 the queen of throwing down
 "fuck, sorry about that"
 given up on romance
 savwy businessowner
 resident gossip
 big problems are Whatever
 - needs therapy
 - Favorite Songs Are 'Find Me Somebody- smells amazing
 To Love' And 'Before He Cheats'
 common sense frequently left on read - hasn't seen most popular movies
 - a matryoshka of pain
 - wishes you didn't look like a dump truck
 knows Wicked by heart
 - only one in squad who does taxes
 Songs Are
 unforgiveable weeb
 - villain origin story is that stubborn
 chin hair that keeps growing back
 - always says 'gg' after every game
 incredible skin care regimen
 - "just drink more water"
 award winning sailor mouth
 - Big Hair, Don't Care

 "What's My Age Again" by Blink 182
 World's Saddest Violin
 Bullshit Magician
 Expletive Noises
 Looks like a million dollars, is probably
 worth a million dollars
 - family person, loves everybody
 keeps Twitter on private
 - meows back at their cat
 - extroverted introvert
 -feels guilty for not logging into
 Animal Crossing for nine months
 thinks existence is kind of funny
 invented the word 'dapper
 - the living embodiment of when
 you try your best but you don't succeed'
 - just wants to be loved and cherished
 -great with animals, never scratched
 the life of the party, when they're
 not launching into drunken diatribes
 -smartest smart person alive
 -stays up until three in the morning
 thinking about the meaning of life
 - an essential addition to any squad
 - reads at 10,000 miles per hour
 wants to stab Banksy
 hates stan culture
 hoards comfort food beneath their desk
 gets sentimental over their Neopets
 used to hoard Beanie Babies
 - hates answering the phone
 - silently lurks in Twitch chatrooms
 - needs more friends
 - stylish drunk with two hollow legs
 - never fails to speak their mind
 great at impressions
 -not-so-secretly depressed
 - regularly confuses main for private
 "just forget I said that haha"
 preserves their right hook for justice
 - stared into the void, got bored
 quotes movies when provoked
 - "That's just, like, your opinion, man."
 the most perfect teeth
 Baby Boy...Baby
 Talk Shit, Get Hit
 Mr. Krabs
 A Dog
 - soft outside, softer inside
 - never ashamed to cry
 - weak spot for pups, needs
 to pet every dog they see
 -only one of the squad that's been punched squad's resident cheapskate
 needs to seriously reconsider things
 trolling game out of control
 A dog
 - never seems to accumulate debt,
 also never tips the waiter
 took college prep in high school
 - can't fight to save their life
 - surprisingly terrifying comebacks
 - multilingual
 gg ez clap"
 oves Bon Iver, Death Grips
 and Beyonce equally
 - Kappa Kappa KappaRoss CoolStoryBob
 workplace's local kissass
 likes to give gifts to sad friends
 living embodiment of a flower crown talks during movies
 home life is a mess
 - needs a vacation, too self-conscious - doesn't flush toilets in public bathrooms
 to take one
 - adopted by everybody
 - "Oh, I won't report you...yet"
 believes they were born in the wrong era
 - has never yelled once
 - in love with the smell of old books
 - wishes on stars when no one's looking
 leaves breadcrumbs in butter
 a well-rounded tool
 - nobody knows why they keep getting invited"Poverty is a state of mind."
champagnesuperhoeva:
red dead redemption 2 tag yourself masterpost now all in one spot for your convenient bullshit needs
tag your chronic pain, tag your panic attacks, tag your existential crisis 


I am all of these yet none of them at the same time
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Adam Sandler, Alive, and Animals: Johnny Boy 'limbo', Marston
 Arthur More Organ
 Holland
 Hoseas Before Broseas
 swagalicious crunchy outside,
 self-deprecating chewy center
 - "how many licks does it take
 the squad's favorite disaster
 scrappy damsel
 squares up at a moment's notice
 can never seem to get their shit together to get to the center of my depression"
 goth jock dropout just wants to settle down -
 - dumbest smart person alive
 - denies being moe
 - "wanna know how I got these scars-
 wait where are you going"
 - makes 50+ post twitter threads nobody reads just needs a break
 - "Actually, correlation is not causation"
 - thinks they're charming, is actually charming
 - constantly forgets their age
 - "back in my day
 - only one who knows what
 the fuck they're talking about
 incredible artist, thinks their stuff is 'okay' still needs to shut the fuck up
 - one shot, one kill
 - "once I go viral it's over for you hoes"
 - has a 'Home Is Where The Heart Is' welcome mat-liked by practically everybody
 - productive procrastinator
 can never hold down a relationship
 - Instant Uncle, Just Add Baby
 suffers from chronic pushover syndrome "no questions, dammit, no questions"
 - jokes hit too close to home
 - Good bad influence
 - weed friend
 Make It Work
 Guy Fieri
 Will Billiamson
 Bad Santa
 -always knows what to play at a party
 - adopts everyone on sight
 - great with kids, great with animals,
 wants to hold your baby
 - scientific evidence good girls
 want bad boys
 - tsundere
 - burns salads
 - "have you eaten today"
 - owns etsy account, too busy to make anything - punches self for fun
 - professional alcoholic
 - always needs to borrow money
 - terrible drunk, never remembers
 what happened that night
 walks around the house in their underwear
 gives great hugs
 needs seven showers
 group's unexpected therapist
 patronus is secondhand embarrassment
 just wants to be part of the family
 "MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S! MCDONALD'S!"*
 is the party
 cultured, well-traveled and stylish;
 made for Instagram
 - *gestures to all of you* "we need
 to do something about this"
 - always starts drama, yet always
 seems to avoid it
 bad taste in literally everything,
 banned from recommending outings
 - will always have squad's back
 iron constitution, never gets sick
 - "say that to my fucking face"
 - may seem Mad, is actually Sad
 petty
 *pulls up in drive-thru, orders single
 starts the day with horoscope readings
 - Chaotic Loyal
 black coffee, leaves

 t"
 FUCKS.EXE STOPPED WORKING 'mSorry Ms. Jackson tOh)
 Bastard Millennial
 Green Hat McGuy
 "join team chat"
 - fashionable at all times, even when
 going to the grocery store
 can't do crime if you ain't cute
 -only dates fictional men
 won't leave the house for days need
 lives on cow tales and TVTropes says they can hold their liquor
 regularly tells squad to hydrate can't actually hold their liquor
 too nice for own good
 living boke and tsukkomi routine
 to shut up yesterday
 social interaction, naps for ten years
 it's basic hygiene
 and laying beneath the stars
 -"please stop talking"
 exhausted after two minutes of
 maybe they're born with it, maybe
 soft spot for animals, slow dancing
 cooler than you
 . living proof the scariest people
 frat brotryhard nerd gem fusion
 come in the nicest packages
 graceful loser, even more graceful winner - "what day is it again"
 nobody sees clapbacks coming until it's never learned how to drive
 every day is roast session day
 - "I'll roast you, I'll roast them,
 I'll roast me fuckin' self"
 - Has never completed No Nut November
 sings in the shower
 - adores Linkin Park
 late
 - "are you ready yet" "almost"
 - allergic to idiots
 Adam Sandler
 Regina O'George
 Let Me Speak To Your Manager
 - retired mom friend, back from retirement
 ages every time someone references
 a vine instead of responding normally
 - smokes sixty packs a day
 Goof Troop
 social norms are for dweebs
 just wants to play videogames
 - No Drama? No ProblemTM
 -"Local Mean Girl Refuses To
 Be Toppled From Throne"
 - loses shit over small things
 -THIS close to cutting someone
 and snack in peace
 shoves people in lockers to show affection
 forgets not to swear in front of other
 never forgets a birthday
 shaped like a friend
 only one in squad who can cook
 only one in squad who can drive
 people's children
 the queen of throwing down
 "fuck, sorry about that"
 given up on romance
 savwy businessowner
 resident gossip
 big problems are Whatever
 - needs therapy
 - Favorite Songs Are 'Find Me Somebody- smells amazing
 To Love' And 'Before He Cheats'
 common sense frequently left on read - hasn't seen most popular movies
 - a matryoshka of pain
 - wishes you didn't look like a dump truck
 knows Wicked by heart
 - only one in squad who does taxes
 Songs Are
 unforgiveable weeb
 - villain origin story is that stubborn
 chin hair that keeps growing back
 - always says 'gg' after every game
 incredible skin care regimen
 - "just drink more water"
 award winning sailor mouth
 - Big Hair, Don't Care

 "What's My Age Again" by Blink 182
 World's Saddest Violin
 Bullshit Magician
 Expletive Noises
 Looks like a million dollars, is probably
 worth a million dollars
 - family person, loves everybody
 keeps Twitter on private
 - meows back at their cat
 - extroverted introvert
 -feels guilty for not logging into
 Animal Crossing for nine months
 thinks existence is kind of funny
 invented the word 'dapper
 - the living embodiment of when
 you try your best but you don't succeed'
 - just wants to be loved and cherished
 -great with animals, never scratched
 the life of the party, when they're
 not launching into drunken diatribes
 -smartest smart person alive
 -stays up until three in the morning
 thinking about the meaning of life
 - an essential addition to any squad
 - reads at 10,000 miles per hour
 wants to stab Banksy
 hates stan culture
 hoards comfort food beneath their desk
 gets sentimental over their Neopets
 used to hoard Beanie Babies
 - hates answering the phone
 - silently lurks in Twitch chatrooms
 - needs more friends
 - stylish drunk with two hollow legs
 - never fails to speak their mind
 great at impressions
 -not-so-secretly depressed
 - regularly confuses main for private
 "just forget I said that haha"
 preserves their right hook for justice
 - stared into the void, got bored
 quotes movies when provoked
 - "That's just, like, your opinion, man."
 the most perfect teeth
 Baby Boy...Baby
 Talk Shit, Get Hit
 Mr. Krabs
 A Dog
 - soft outside, softer inside
 - never ashamed to cry
 - weak spot for pups, needs
 to pet every dog they see
 -only one of the squad that's been punched squad's resident cheapskate
 needs to seriously reconsider things
 trolling game out of control
 A dog
 - never seems to accumulate debt,
 also never tips the waiter
 took college prep in high school
 - can't fight to save their life
 - surprisingly terrifying comebacks
 - multilingual
 gg ez clap"
 oves Bon Iver, Death Grips
 and Beyonce equally
 - Kappa Kappa KappaRoss CoolStoryBob
 workplace's local kissass
 likes to give gifts to sad friends
 living embodiment of a flower crown talks during movies
 home life is a mess
 - needs a vacation, too self-conscious - doesn't flush toilets in public bathrooms
 to take one
 - adopted by everybody
 - "Oh, I won't report you...yet"
 believes they were born in the wrong era
 - has never yelled once
 - in love with the smell of old books
 - wishes on stars when no one's looking
 leaves breadcrumbs in butter
 a well-rounded tool
 - nobody knows why they keep getting invited"Poverty is a state of mind."
champagnesuperhoeva:
red dead redemption 2 tag yourself masterpost now all in one spot for your convenient bullshit needs
tag your chronic pain, tag your panic attacks, tag your existential crisis 


I am all of these yet none of them at the same time
                
            

            
            
champagnesuperhoeva:
red dead redemption 2 tag yourself masterpost now all in one spot for your convenient bullshit needs
tag your chronic p...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Beautiful, Bitch, and Boo: olivia joy
 @livvmaloney
 when I dropped everything to do some
 Brazilian man's English homework:

 all Verizon
 10:00 PM
 _paulocaetano
 Today at 9:24 PM
 Done
 Hey Kitty girl
 I need some help
 Pleaseeee
 Yo
 Thank god
 Are u American?
 Yes
 I'm brazilian
 Here we have english class
 And i'm hang out with a cute guy
 I want to impress
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 If i impress him
 I can Kiss on this weekend
 Are you asking me how to impress
 him?
 6)
 a-( ) Did / eat
 b-( ) Did / eaten
 you
 c-( ) Have /eaten
 d-( ) Have / eat
 a movie last Saturday
 7) Mary
 a-( ) did watch
 b-( ) didn't watch
 C-(
 d-(
 ) didn't watched
 ) has watched
 March
 8) He hasn't come here
 d-( ) already
 b-( )just
 9) The cake is ready I have
 a-( ) already
 b-( ) yet
 prepared it
 { ) for
 d-( ) never
 at home last week
 10) My father
 a-( ) has stayed
 have stayed
 d-(
 ) did stay
 to the USA last year
 11) He
 a-( ) move
 b-( ) moved
 C-( ) has moved
 d-( ) did move
 twenty years.
 12)r've lived here
 a-(since
 b-() yet
 c-( ) already
 d-( ) for
 O Reply
 Choose the correct alternative
 1) Last year she
 a-( )did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) I
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 C-( ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-( ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 4)
 the man
 much money last night ?
 c-() Did / spend
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 1) Last year she
 a-() did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) 1
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 c-《 ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-f ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 much money last night?
 ) Did / spend
 ) Has / spend
 the man
 a-( ) Did / spent
 b-( ) Has / spent
 c-(
 d-(
 some gifts for his children
 5) He
 a-( ) has brought
 b-( ) has bring
 C-( ) brought
 d-f ) did bring
 Japanese food ?
 you already
 6)
 a-( ) Did/ eat
 c-() Have / eatern
 d-( ) Have / eat
 Did/ eaten
 O Reply
 I need help in this shit
 I got u fam
 So u Will help me?
 Yes going to do it now for you
 One minute
 Thank Boo i knew New york's girls
 are the best one
 I'm from Rhode Island boo, even
 better
 Write a message...

 Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 I ask help for a cali chick and she
 block me
 What a bitch
 Yaas grl
 Omg grl
 U write
 U rock
 Write a message...
tiny-septic-box-sam:

bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Beautiful, Bitch, and Boo: olivia joy
 @livvmaloney
 when I dropped everything to do some
 Brazilian man's English homework:

 all Verizon
 10:00 PM
 _paulocaetano
 Today at 9:24 PM
 Done
 Hey Kitty girl
 I need some help
 Pleaseeee
 Yo
 Thank god
 Are u American?
 Yes
 I'm brazilian
 Here we have english class
 And i'm hang out with a cute guy
 I want to impress
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 If i impress him
 I can Kiss on this weekend
 Are you asking me how to impress
 him?
 6)
 a-( ) Did / eat
 b-( ) Did / eaten
 you
 c-( ) Have /eaten
 d-( ) Have / eat
 a movie last Saturday
 7) Mary
 a-( ) did watch
 b-( ) didn't watch
 C-(
 d-(
 ) didn't watched
 ) has watched
 March
 8) He hasn't come here
 d-( ) already
 b-( )just
 9) The cake is ready I have
 a-( ) already
 b-( ) yet
 prepared it
 { ) for
 d-( ) never
 at home last week
 10) My father
 a-( ) has stayed
 have stayed
 d-(
 ) did stay
 to the USA last year
 11) He
 a-( ) move
 b-( ) moved
 C-( ) has moved
 d-( ) did move
 twenty years.
 12)r've lived here
 a-(since
 b-() yet
 c-( ) already
 d-( ) for
 O Reply
 Choose the correct alternative
 1) Last year she
 a-( )did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) I
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 C-( ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-( ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 4)
 the man
 much money last night ?
 c-() Did / spend
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 1) Last year she
 a-() did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) 1
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 c-《 ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-f ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 much money last night?
 ) Did / spend
 ) Has / spend
 the man
 a-( ) Did / spent
 b-( ) Has / spent
 c-(
 d-(
 some gifts for his children
 5) He
 a-( ) has brought
 b-( ) has bring
 C-( ) brought
 d-f ) did bring
 Japanese food ?
 you already
 6)
 a-( ) Did/ eat
 c-() Have / eatern
 d-( ) Have / eat
 Did/ eaten
 O Reply
 I need help in this shit
 I got u fam
 So u Will help me?
 Yes going to do it now for you
 One minute
 Thank Boo i knew New york's girls
 are the best one
 I'm from Rhode Island boo, even
 better
 Write a message...

 Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 I ask help for a cali chick and she
 block me
 What a bitch
 Yaas grl
 Omg grl
 U write
 U rock
 Write a message...
tiny-septic-box-sam:

bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier

                
            

            
            
tiny-septic-box-sam:

bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier


            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Amazon, Facebook, and Family: Agriculture
 Nature
bogleech:

revretch:
awed-frog:



Prairies are some of the most endangered ecosystems in the world, with the tallgrass prairie being the most endangered. Only 1-4% of tallgrass prairie still exists. Prairies are critically important, not only for the unique biodiversity they possess, but for their effect on climate. The ability to store carbon is a valuable ecological service in today’s changing climate. Carbon, which is emitted both naturally and by human activities such as burning coal to create electricity, is a greenhouse gas that is increasing in the Earth’s atmosphere. Reports from the International Panel on Climate Change, a group of more than 2,000 climate scientists from around the world, agree that increased greenhouse gases are causing climate change, which is leading to sea level rise, higher temperatures, and altered rain patterns. Most of the prairie’s carbon sequestration happens below ground, where prairie roots can dig into the soil to depths up to 15 feet and more. Prairies can store much more carbon below ground than a forest can store above ground. In fact, the prairie was once the largest carbon sink in the world-much bigger than the Amazon rainforest-and its destruction has had devastating effects.


[source]

I just have to add–that extensive root system? It’s not just how the plant eats, and how it keeps itself from getting pulled out of the ground during storms, or dying when its aboveground portion is eaten… it’s how it talks to its friends and family, how it shares food with its friends and family, and more than likely, how it thinks. That’s a whole plant brain we’ve domesticated away, leaving a helpless organism that has trouble figuring out when it’s under attack by pests, what to do about it, has very little in the way of chemical defense so it can do something about it, and can’t even warn its neighbors. Even apart from the ecological concerns, what we’ve done is honestly pretty cruel.

Here’s some more articles on this too!https://www.theguardian.com/science/2018/may/02/plants-talk-to-each-other-through-their-rootshttp://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20141111-plants-have-a-hidden-internethttps://www.the-scientist.com/features/plant-talk-38209Whether or not you think this should qualify as a form of “intelligence” as we know it (which in itself as a pretty nebulous and poorly defined thing), plants exhibit complicated interactive behaviors that help them grow and thrive, and the way we harvest a lot of them for our produce just doesn’t even give them a chance to reach their maturity and begin trading nutrients the way they’re supposed to.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Amazon, Facebook, and Family: Agriculture
 Nature
bogleech:

revretch:
awed-frog:



Prairies are some of the most endangered ecosystems in the world, with the tallgrass prairie being the most endangered. Only 1-4% of tallgrass prairie still exists. Prairies are critically important, not only for the unique biodiversity they possess, but for their effect on climate. The ability to store carbon is a valuable ecological service in today’s changing climate. Carbon, which is emitted both naturally and by human activities such as burning coal to create electricity, is a greenhouse gas that is increasing in the Earth’s atmosphere. Reports from the International Panel on Climate Change, a group of more than 2,000 climate scientists from around the world, agree that increased greenhouse gases are causing climate change, which is leading to sea level rise, higher temperatures, and altered rain patterns. Most of the prairie’s carbon sequestration happens below ground, where prairie roots can dig into the soil to depths up to 15 feet and more. Prairies can store much more carbon below ground than a forest can store above ground. In fact, the prairie was once the largest carbon sink in the world-much bigger than the Amazon rainforest-and its destruction has had devastating effects.


[source]

I just have to add–that extensive root system? It’s not just how the plant eats, and how it keeps itself from getting pulled out of the ground during storms, or dying when its aboveground portion is eaten… it’s how it talks to its friends and family, how it shares food with its friends and family, and more than likely, how it thinks. That’s a whole plant brain we’ve domesticated away, leaving a helpless organism that has trouble figuring out when it’s under attack by pests, what to do about it, has very little in the way of chemical defense so it can do something about it, and can’t even warn its neighbors. Even apart from the ecological concerns, what we’ve done is honestly pretty cruel.

Here’s some more articles on this too!https://www.theguardian.com/science/2018/may/02/plants-talk-to-each-other-through-their-rootshttp://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20141111-plants-have-a-hidden-internethttps://www.the-scientist.com/features/plant-talk-38209Whether or not you think this should qualify as a form of “intelligence” as we know it (which in itself as a pretty nebulous and poorly defined thing), plants exhibit complicated interactive behaviors that help them grow and thrive, and the way we harvest a lot of them for our produce just doesn’t even give them a chance to reach their maturity and begin trading nutrients the way they’re supposed to.
                
            

            
            
bogleech:

revretch:
awed-frog:



Prairies are some of the most endangered ecosystems in the world, with the tallgrass prairie being the mo...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            




    Beautiful, Bitch, and Boo: olivia joy
 @livvmaloney
 when I dropped everything to do some
 Brazilian man's English homework:

 all Verizon
 10:00 PM
 _paulocaetano
 Today at 9:24 PM
 Done
 Hey Kitty girl
 I need some help
 Pleaseeee
 Yo
 Thank god
 Are u American?
 Yes
 I'm brazilian
 Here we have english class
 And i'm hang out with a cute guy
 I want to impress
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 If i impress him
 I can Kiss on this weekend
 Are you asking me how to impress
 him?
 6)
 a-( ) Did / eat
 b-( ) Did / eaten
 you
 c-( ) Have /eaten
 d-( ) Have / eat
 a movie last Saturday
 7) Mary
 a-( ) did watch
 b-( ) didn't watch
 C-(
 d-(
 ) didn't watched
 ) has watched
 March
 8) He hasn't come here
 d-( ) already
 b-( )just
 9) The cake is ready I have
 a-( ) already
 b-( ) yet
 prepared it
 { ) for
 d-( ) never
 at home last week
 10) My father
 a-( ) has stayed
 have stayed
 d-(
 ) did stay
 to the USA last year
 11) He
 a-( ) move
 b-( ) moved
 C-( ) has moved
 d-( ) did move
 twenty years.
 12)r've lived here
 a-(since
 b-() yet
 c-( ) already
 d-( ) for
 O Reply
 Choose the correct alternative
 1) Last year she
 a-( )did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) I
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 C-( ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-( ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 4)
 the man
 much money last night ?
 c-() Did / spend
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 1) Last year she
 a-() did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) 1
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 c-《 ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-f ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 much money last night?
 ) Did / spend
 ) Has / spend
 the man
 a-( ) Did / spent
 b-( ) Has / spent
 c-(
 d-(
 some gifts for his children
 5) He
 a-( ) has brought
 b-( ) has bring
 C-( ) brought
 d-f ) did bring
 Japanese food ?
 you already
 6)
 a-( ) Did/ eat
 c-() Have / eatern
 d-( ) Have / eat
 Did/ eaten
 O Reply
 I need help in this shit
 I got u fam
 So u Will help me?
 Yes going to do it now for you
 One minute
 Thank Boo i knew New york's girls
 are the best one
 I'm from Rhode Island boo, even
 better
 Write a message...

 Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 I ask help for a cali chick and she
 block me
 What a bitch
 Yaas grl
 Omg grl
 U write
 U rock
 Write a message...
livingwithdystonia:

tiny-septic-box-sam:
bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier

did he do her Spanish homework!? I must know!

Brazilians speak Portuguese.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Beautiful, Bitch, and Boo: olivia joy
 @livvmaloney
 when I dropped everything to do some
 Brazilian man's English homework:

 all Verizon
 10:00 PM
 _paulocaetano
 Today at 9:24 PM
 Done
 Hey Kitty girl
 I need some help
 Pleaseeee
 Yo
 Thank god
 Are u American?
 Yes
 I'm brazilian
 Here we have english class
 And i'm hang out with a cute guy
 I want to impress
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 If i impress him
 I can Kiss on this weekend
 Are you asking me how to impress
 him?
 6)
 a-( ) Did / eat
 b-( ) Did / eaten
 you
 c-( ) Have /eaten
 d-( ) Have / eat
 a movie last Saturday
 7) Mary
 a-( ) did watch
 b-( ) didn't watch
 C-(
 d-(
 ) didn't watched
 ) has watched
 March
 8) He hasn't come here
 d-( ) already
 b-( )just
 9) The cake is ready I have
 a-( ) already
 b-( ) yet
 prepared it
 { ) for
 d-( ) never
 at home last week
 10) My father
 a-( ) has stayed
 have stayed
 d-(
 ) did stay
 to the USA last year
 11) He
 a-( ) move
 b-( ) moved
 C-( ) has moved
 d-( ) did move
 twenty years.
 12)r've lived here
 a-(since
 b-() yet
 c-( ) already
 d-( ) for
 O Reply
 Choose the correct alternative
 1) Last year she
 a-( )did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) I
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 C-( ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-( ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 4)
 the man
 much money last night ?
 c-() Did / spend
 Write a message...

 . Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 1) Last year she
 a-() did go
 b-( ) has gone
 to England on holiday
 c-( ) went
 d-( ) did went
 2) 1
 a-( ) have visited
 b-( ) visited
 a lot of interesting places yesterday
 c-《 ) have visit
 d-( ) did visit
 3) The students
 a-( ) saw
 b-( ) has seen
 a beautiful rainbow
 c-f ) have see
 d-( ) have seen
 much money last night?
 ) Did / spend
 ) Has / spend
 the man
 a-( ) Did / spent
 b-( ) Has / spent
 c-(
 d-(
 some gifts for his children
 5) He
 a-( ) has brought
 b-( ) has bring
 C-( ) brought
 d-f ) did bring
 Japanese food ?
 you already
 6)
 a-( ) Did/ eat
 c-() Have / eatern
 d-( ) Have / eat
 Did/ eaten
 O Reply
 I need help in this shit
 I got u fam
 So u Will help me?
 Yes going to do it now for you
 One minute
 Thank Boo i knew New york's girls
 are the best one
 I'm from Rhode Island boo, even
 better
 Write a message...

 Verizon
 10:00 PM
 Done
 paulocaetano
 I ask help for a cali chick and she
 block me
 What a bitch
 Yaas grl
 Omg grl
 U write
 U rock
 Write a message...
livingwithdystonia:

tiny-septic-box-sam:
bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier

did he do her Spanish homework!? I must know!

Brazilians speak Portuguese.
                
            

            
            
livingwithdystonia:

tiny-septic-box-sam:
bornlucky:

bonus:



I’ve never seen this with the update and it makes it so much funnier

did he...