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Apple, Fire, and Work: HOW TO KILL THE DRAGON USING 9 PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES BY O toggl Goon Squar You DISCOVER YoUR YOU HAVE PYTHON | | EVERYBODY MARVELS AT | |TOOLS ARE ONLY FOR YOUR AWESOME DRAGON SLAYING A SNAKE SLAYING TOOLS YOU'VE GOT AN NSDRAGONJUST AS YOURE ALMOST CLASS, BUT YoU NEED TO WRITE AN Soo LOC EXTENSION ANOTHER DRAGON To IMPLEMENT SLAYABILITY You HAVE SWIFT DONE, APPLE RELEASES NoW EVERYTHING'S ON You HAVE Css/HTML YoU TRY To coVEK THE FIRE (ALSo, THE VERTI DRAGON WITH A HIGHLY CENTER HAS FAILED FLAMMABLE BLANKET You HAVE SCALA YOUR HORSE HAS CRASHED : AS WORK YOU HAVE C杄 | | YOU SET ALL REFERENCES TO | BUT WITH NON-DETERMINISTIC GARBAGE COLLECTION, CAN You EVER BE SURE THE DRAGON THE DRAGON TO NULL THE DRAGON SEEMS GONE. IS REALLY GONE? YoU GO FRoM VILLAGE TD VILLAGE FIGHTING THE SAME YOU HAVE COBOL YOU MAKE A FORTUNE IN THE PROCESS DRAGON OVER AND OVER IT'S AN INCREDIBLY FAST! MIKE PALL HAS You HAVE LUAAND EFFECTIVE WANE ES THE LAST BULLETS, BUT HES GoNE & YoU BUT You'RE OUT OF AMMO DON'T KNoW HIS REAL NAME OR EVEN WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE You IMPLEMENT A MONAD To ENCAPSULATE THE DEAGON KILLING SIDE-EFFECTS THE VILLAGERS ARE CONCERNED AND YoU NEED HELP YOU HAVE HASELLI URGE YOU To STOP, BUT YOU SAY IT'S OK CAUSE AMONAD IS JUST A MONOID IN THE CATEGORY OF ENDOFUNSTORS,S YoU DONT SEE WHAT AND A MoNAD THE PROBLEM YOU DONT HAVE DRAGON SLAYING PoWERS So You DRINK IT To GET GOOD ON11 YOU DIED You HAVE COFFEESCRIPT MART VIRKUS 17 TOGGL.COM The knight doesnt seem to git it
Apple, Fire, and Work: HOW TO KILL THE DRAGON
 USING 9 PROGRAMMING
 LANGUAGES
 BY O toggl
 Goon Squar
 You DISCOVER YoUR
 YOU HAVE PYTHON | | EVERYBODY MARVELS AT | |TOOLS ARE ONLY FOR
 YOUR AWESOME DRAGON
 SLAYING A SNAKE
 SLAYING TOOLS
 YOU'VE GOT AN NSDRAGONJUST AS YOURE ALMOST
 CLASS, BUT YoU NEED TO
 WRITE AN Soo LOC EXTENSION ANOTHER DRAGON
 To IMPLEMENT SLAYABILITY
 You HAVE SWIFT
 DONE, APPLE RELEASES
 NoW EVERYTHING'S ON
 You HAVE
 Css/HTML
 YoU TRY To coVEK THE FIRE (ALSo, THE VERTI
 DRAGON WITH A HIGHLY
 CENTER HAS FAILED
 FLAMMABLE BLANKET
 You HAVE SCALA
 YOUR HORSE HAS CRASHED :
 AS
 WORK
 YOU HAVE C杄 | | YOU SET ALL REFERENCES TO | BUT WITH NON-DETERMINISTIC
 GARBAGE COLLECTION, CAN You
 EVER BE SURE THE DRAGON
 THE DRAGON TO NULL
 THE DRAGON SEEMS GONE. IS REALLY GONE?
 YoU GO FRoM VILLAGE TD
 VILLAGE FIGHTING THE SAME
 YOU HAVE COBOL
 YOU MAKE A FORTUNE
 IN THE PROCESS
 DRAGON OVER AND OVER
 IT'S AN INCREDIBLY FAST! MIKE PALL HAS
 You HAVE LUAAND EFFECTIVE WANE ES
 THE LAST BULLETS,
 BUT HES GoNE & YoU
 BUT You'RE OUT OF AMMO DON'T KNoW HIS REAL
 NAME OR EVEN WHAT
 HE LOOKS LIKE
 You IMPLEMENT A MONAD To ENCAPSULATE
 THE DEAGON KILLING SIDE-EFFECTS
 THE VILLAGERS ARE CONCERNED AND
 YoU NEED HELP
 YOU HAVE HASELLI URGE YOU To STOP, BUT YOU SAY IT'S OK
 CAUSE AMONAD IS JUST A MONOID IN
 THE CATEGORY OF ENDOFUNSTORS,S
 YoU DONT SEE WHAT
 AND A MoNAD
 THE PROBLEM
 YOU DONT HAVE DRAGON
 SLAYING PoWERS So You
 DRINK IT To GET GOOD
 ON11 YOU DIED
 You HAVE
 COFFEESCRIPT
 MART VIRKUS 17 TOGGL.COM
The knight doesnt seem to git it

The knight doesnt seem to git it

Church, Fire, and Internet: DISORDERLY Oct. 1 - A group of students playing hide and seek in the Harris Fine Arts Center at 11 p.m. caused a faculty member to call the University Police. The police arrived but were not able to find any of the students. deadmomjokes: owl-librarian: #you just made it a higher stakes game of hide and seek Having gone to this University, and having personally played hide and seek in the Harris Fine Arts Center, I guarantee you that NOBODY finds hiders unless they, too, are familiar with the bowels of the HFAC. Once you get down to the practice-room levels, time stops completely and you could walk up the back stair and end up in 1967. The halls change at least 8 times an hour, there’s no way you’re getting back out the same way you came in. When the lights start going off at 10 the whole bottom 3 floors descend into some subsection of the fey realm. I once hid up on the balcony stage access fire-escape thing of a lower-level theater, and 3 faculty walked by under me and not a one of them noticed the hulking, wheezing asthmatic lurking above them, half dangling off a rickety metal ladder that probably wasn’t supposed to be climbed. A fellow hider friend came and found me, and we sat up there for 30 minutes listening to some distant clicking sound before we realized nobody was actually going to find us. We had no cell service, and no internet to reach anyone. We got lost trying to get back out, and once we resurfaced, everyone else was gone, the building was empty, and we just went home to eat ice cream. Nobody knew where we had disappeared to, and nobody bothered to check if we were there before leaving. For all I know, they just assumed we had been lost to the gaping maw of the HFAC basement and when they saw us at church on Sunday it was probably like they’d seen a ghost. None of us ever mentioned it again. Basically what I’m saying is Campus Police had no hope of finding them in the first place and probably lost an officer or two if they actually conducted a real search, because nobody except Senior art majors or veteran custodians actually knows how to navigate that building and make it out in the same dimension they entered from. Not at 11pm anyway.
Church, Fire, and Internet: DISORDERLY
 Oct. 1 - A group of students
 playing hide and seek in the
 Harris Fine Arts Center at 11
 p.m. caused a faculty member
 to call the University Police.
 The police arrived but were
 not able to find any of the
 students.
deadmomjokes:
owl-librarian:
#you just made it a higher stakes game of hide and seek
Having gone to this University, and having personally played hide and seek in the Harris Fine Arts Center, I guarantee you that NOBODY finds hiders unless they, too, are familiar with the bowels of the HFAC. Once you get down to the practice-room levels, time stops completely and you could walk up the back stair and end up in 1967. The halls change at least 8 times an hour, there’s no way you’re getting back out the same way you came in. When the lights start going off at 10 the whole bottom 3 floors descend into some subsection of the fey realm. I once hid up on the balcony stage access fire-escape thing of a lower-level theater, and 3 faculty walked by under me and not a one of them noticed the hulking, wheezing asthmatic lurking above them, half dangling off a rickety metal ladder that probably wasn’t supposed to be climbed. A fellow hider friend came and found me, and we sat up there for 30 minutes listening to some distant clicking sound before we realized nobody was actually going to find us. We had no cell service, and no internet to reach anyone. We got lost trying to get back out, and once we resurfaced, everyone else was gone, the building was empty, and we just went home to eat ice cream. Nobody knew where we had disappeared to, and nobody bothered to check if we were there before leaving. For all I know, they just assumed we had been lost to the gaping maw of the HFAC basement and when they saw us at church on Sunday it was probably like they’d seen a ghost. None of us ever mentioned it again.
Basically what I’m saying is Campus Police had no hope of finding them in the first place and probably lost an officer or two if they actually conducted a real search, because nobody except Senior art majors or veteran custodians actually knows how to navigate that building and make it out in the same dimension they entered from. Not at 11pm anyway.

deadmomjokes: owl-librarian: #you just made it a higher stakes game of hide and seek Having gone to this University, and having personally p...

Aaron Eckhart , Avengers Age of Ultron, and Birdman: EMMA STONE 54 Sean Penn, 54 Colin Firth, 53 EMMA STONE'S AGE Edward Norton, 45 LOVE INTEREST'S AGE Joaquin Phoenix, 40 Bradley Cooper, 40 an Gosling 30 Andrew Garfield, 28 Penn Badgley, 23 Chris Lowell 26 Irrational Birdman, Man Jesse Eisenberg, 25 Gangster 26 26 Squad, 2!5 Jonah Hil 23 24 The Help, 23 Easy A, 21 Aloha, 26 Superbad 18 The Amazing Spider-Man Zombieland 20 Crazy, Stupid, Love Magic in the Moonlight 16 2007 2008 2009 2010 201 2012 2013 2014 2015 YEAR ULTURE SCARLETT JOHANSSON 54 Bill Murray 52 SCARLETT JOHANSSON'S AGE Mark Ruffalo, 47 LOVE INTEREST'S AGE Jon Favreau, 47 Billy Bob Thornton, 46 Aaron Eckhart, 38 Matt Damon, 41 Javier Bardem, 39 Hugh Jackman, 37 Joaquin Phoenix, 39 Joseph Gordon- 32 Ewan McGregor, 34 Bradley Cooper 34 Her 29 Jonatharn Rhys Meyers, 28 Chris Evans, 26 We Bought a Zoo, 27 Chef. Don Jon, 29 28 Lost in Translation, 18 The Nanny 24 Match Diaries, 23 Point 22 He's Just Not Vicky That Into You The 21 21 Island, 20 Cristina 21 Bcelona Avengers: Age of Ultron 30 The Man Who Wasn'tv There 16 The Black Scoop Dahlia 16 2001 2003 2005 2007 2009 2011 2013 2015 YEAR ULTURE JENNIFER LAWRENCE 54 JENNIFER LAWRENCE'S AGE LOVE INTEREST'S AGE Christian Bale, 39 Bradley Cooper 40 Bradley Cooper 37 Edgar Ramirez, 38 Michael Fassbender 34 Liam msworth 23 Max Thieriot, 23 Silver Linings Hunger Playbook American Hustle, 23 Serena, 24 The Anton Yelchin, Games, Joy 25 21 23 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire Like X-Men: Crazy First Class, 21 Josh the End of Hutcherson, the Street 20 19 16 2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 YEAR VULTURE ambermusicbox: overherewiththequeers: overherewiththequeers: castielcampbell: jaydenthorne: No. Hollywood has an older man problem. this is so gross I wish I could remember the name of the actress who went ballistic after being told that, at 35, she was too old to play the love interest for the 55-year-old lead. It was Maggie Gyllenhall.  And I stand corrected, she was 37. Damn
Aaron Eckhart , Avengers Age of Ultron, and Birdman: EMMA STONE
 54
 Sean Penn, 54
 Colin Firth, 53
 EMMA STONE'S AGE
 Edward
 Norton,
 45
 LOVE INTEREST'S AGE
 Joaquin
 Phoenix,
 40
 Bradley
 Cooper, 40
 an
 Gosling
 30
 Andrew
 Garfield,
 28
 Penn
 Badgley,
 23
 Chris
 Lowell
 26
 Irrational
 Birdman, Man
 Jesse
 Eisenberg,
 25
 Gangster
 26
 26
 Squad, 2!5
 Jonah Hil
 23
 24
 The Help, 23
 Easy A, 21
 Aloha, 26
 Superbad
 18
 The
 Amazing
 Spider-Man
 Zombieland
 20
 Crazy,
 Stupid, Love
 Magic in the
 Moonlight
 16
 2007 2008 2009 2010 201 2012 2013 2014 2015
 YEAR
 ULTURE

 SCARLETT JOHANSSON
 54
 Bill Murray
 52
 SCARLETT JOHANSSON'S AGE
 Mark
 Ruffalo,
 47
 LOVE INTEREST'S AGE
 Jon Favreau, 47
 Billy Bob
 Thornton,
 46
 Aaron Eckhart,
 38
 Matt Damon,
 41
 Javier
 Bardem,
 39
 Hugh
 Jackman,
 37
 Joaquin
 Phoenix,
 39
 Joseph
 Gordon-
 32
 Ewan McGregor, 34
 Bradley
 Cooper
 34
 Her
 29
 Jonatharn
 Rhys Meyers, 28
 Chris
 Evans,
 26
 We Bought
 a Zoo,
 27
 Chef.
 Don Jon, 29
 28
 Lost in
 Translation,
 18
 The Nanny 24
 Match Diaries, 23
 Point 22
 He's Just Not
 Vicky That Into You
 The 21 21
 Island, 20
 Cristina
 21 Bcelona
 Avengers:
 Age of Ultron
 30
 The Man
 Who Wasn'tv
 There
 16
 The Black
 Scoop Dahlia
 16
 2001
 2003
 2005
 2007
 2009
 2011
 2013
 2015
 YEAR
 ULTURE

 JENNIFER LAWRENCE
 54
 JENNIFER LAWRENCE'S AGE
 LOVE INTEREST'S AGE
 Christian Bale,
 39
 Bradley Cooper
 40
 Bradley Cooper
 37
 Edgar Ramirez, 38
 Michael
 Fassbender
 34
 Liam
 msworth
 23
 Max
 Thieriot,
 23
 Silver
 Linings
 Hunger Playbook
 American
 Hustle,
 23
 Serena,
 24
 The
 Anton Yelchin, Games,
 Joy
 25
 21
 23
 The Hunger Games:
 Catching Fire
 Like
 X-Men: Crazy
 First Class, 21
 Josh the End of
 Hutcherson, the Street
 20
 19
 16
 2011
 2012
 2013
 2014
 2015
 YEAR
 VULTURE
ambermusicbox:

overherewiththequeers:

overherewiththequeers:

castielcampbell:

jaydenthorne:

No. Hollywood has an older man problem.

this is so gross

I wish I could remember the name of the actress who went ballistic after being told that, at 35, she was too old to play the love interest for the 55-year-old lead.

It was Maggie Gyllenhall.  And I stand corrected, she was 37.


Damn

ambermusicbox: overherewiththequeers: overherewiththequeers: castielcampbell: jaydenthorne: No. Hollywood has an older man problem. th...

Blessed, Cats, and Family: PAT petermorwood: surprisekitty: wizardmoon: skypig357: giflounge: 1944 - Snowball the cat tries to take over a machine gun in Normandy so she can shoot some Nazis herself. Blessed post. Good kitty i want someone to read that headline in an old timey reporter voice Okay fun fact: cats were actively deployed to trenches and ships to help deal with rodent infestations in both world wars, and they had the curb cutter effect of keeping the men’s spirits high. One cat, Simon, was given the rank “Able Seacat Simon” after dutifully killing rats and mice that were destroying the HMS Amethyst’s food supplies. The ship had come under fire during the Chinese civil war and many of its crewmen had died. The cat had been gravely injured, too, but he picked out the shrapnel himself – seriously – and went straight to killing the rodents that were overrunning the ship. He unfortunately passed from his injuries two weeks before he was scheduled to receive the Dickin Medal. To this day, he is the only cat to receive this award. Here’s another WW1 trenchcat, who would have been ratter, mouser, companion and gas warning - not AFAIK by dying, like a canary, but since cats reacted to the smell of gas long before it was strong enough for humans to notice, the troops had a bit more time to get their masks on, and the cats went into gasproof boxes. Meanwhile, somewhere on the other side of No Man’s Land… Meet Percy, mascot of HMLS (D20) “Daphne” with Lt Drader. Both survived the War, and Percy retired to live out his peacetime life in the Drader family home. (Here’s a video clip; given how noisy, hot and smelly early tanks were, Percy seems remarkably unfazed.)  A US Army tank cat, Mustard of the 321st, with a Renault FT light tank and its driver Sgt Postal… A Royal Artillery kitten (the battery mascot)… Pincher of HMS Vindex on what looks like a Sopwith Pup scout… Togo, ship’s cat of HMS Dreadnought (though I’ve also seen “HMS Irresistible”)… Ship’s cat of HMS Queen Elizabeth atop 15″ main battery… And speaking of big ships and big guns… “Make nice all you like, Human. I despise you. I wanted a billet on a battleship, not this tinpot destroyer…” (Ching, of HMAS Swan.)
Blessed, Cats, and Family: PAT
petermorwood:

surprisekitty:

wizardmoon:

skypig357:

giflounge:
1944 - Snowball the cat tries to take over a machine gun in Normandy so she can shoot some Nazis herself.

Blessed post. Good kitty

i want someone to read that headline in an old timey reporter voice

Okay fun fact: cats were actively deployed to trenches and ships to help deal with rodent infestations in both world wars, and they had the curb cutter effect of keeping the men’s spirits high.
One cat, Simon, was given the rank “Able Seacat Simon” after dutifully killing rats and mice that were destroying the HMS Amethyst’s food supplies. The ship had come under fire during the Chinese civil war and many of its crewmen had died. The cat had been gravely injured, too, but he picked out the shrapnel himself – seriously – and went straight to killing the rodents that were overrunning the ship. He unfortunately passed from his injuries two weeks before he was scheduled to receive the Dickin Medal. To this day, he is the only cat to receive this award.

Here’s another WW1 trenchcat, who would have been ratter, mouser, companion and gas warning - not AFAIK by dying, like a canary, but since cats reacted to the smell of gas long before it was strong enough for humans to notice, the troops had a bit more time to get their masks on, and the cats went into gasproof boxes.
Meanwhile, somewhere on the other side of No Man’s Land…
Meet Percy, mascot of HMLS (D20) “Daphne” with Lt Drader. Both survived the War, and Percy retired to live out his peacetime life in the Drader family home. 

(Here’s a video clip; given how noisy, hot and smelly early tanks were, Percy seems remarkably unfazed.) 
A US Army tank cat, Mustard of the 321st, with a Renault FT light tank and its driver Sgt Postal…
A Royal Artillery kitten (the battery mascot)…
Pincher of HMS Vindex on what looks like a Sopwith Pup scout…
Togo, ship’s cat of HMS Dreadnought (though I’ve also seen “HMS Irresistible”)…
Ship’s cat of HMS Queen Elizabeth atop 15″ main battery…
And speaking of big ships and big guns…
“Make nice all you like, Human. I despise you. I wanted a billet on a battleship, not this tinpot destroyer…” (Ching, of HMAS Swan.)

petermorwood: surprisekitty: wizardmoon: skypig357: giflounge: 1944 - Snowball the cat tries to take over a machine gun in Normandy so s...

Animals, Fire, and Girls: Fat rat stuck in manhole rescued by firefighters in Germany KATE LYONS FEBRUARY 27, 2019 A multi-agency rescue operation has taken place in the town of Bensheim in Germany after a tubby rat became stuck in a manhole cover. The rat, still plump with winterspeck - which translates literally as winter bacon and refers to extra pounds piled on in the colder months became stuck after it tried to squeeze through a small gap in the sewer cover. The Auerbach volunteer fire brigade was called in, as was the Rhein Neckar animal rescue team, and together a team of about eight rescuers was able to raise the cover and pull the rat free. It took about eight firefighters and an animal expert to help the rat to freedom. Photograph: Berufstierrettung Rhein Neckar/ Freiwillige Feuerwehr Auerbach The rat had quite a lot of winter fat and got stuck on its hips _nothing was going forward and nothing back," animal rescuer Michael Sehr told news agency DPA Photos of the rat showed its head and rotund torso poking out of the hole, with its bottom half obscured by the sewer cover. In one image it seemed to almost be calling for hilfe. The fire brigade said the rat escaped unhurt. "The animal was subsequently released again into the wild. The fire department's operation was completed after a good 25 minutes," said the Auerbach fire department. After the successful rescue, two young girls presented the animal rescue teanm with a gift to say thank you- a drawing of a rat surrounded by love hearts with the word "danke!" written on it. Sehr told DPA he did not have any qualms about rescuing the rat. "Even animals that are hated by many people deserve respect," he said. True story
Animals, Fire, and Girls: Fat rat stuck in manhole rescued by
 firefighters in Germany
 KATE LYONS FEBRUARY 27, 2019
 A multi-agency rescue operation has taken place in the town of Bensheim in
 Germany after a tubby rat became stuck in a manhole cover.

 The rat, still plump with winterspeck - which translates literally as winter
 bacon and refers to extra pounds piled on in the colder months became
 stuck after it tried to squeeze through a small gap in the sewer cover.
 The Auerbach volunteer fire brigade was called in, as was the Rhein Neckar
 animal rescue team, and together a team of about eight rescuers was able to
 raise the cover and pull the rat free.

 It took about eight firefighters and an animal expert to help the rat to freedom. Photograph:
 Berufstierrettung Rhein Neckar/ Freiwillige Feuerwehr Auerbach

 The
 rat
 had
 quite
 a
 lot
 of
 winter
 fat
 and
 got
 stuck
 on
 its
 hips
 _nothing
 was going forward and nothing back," animal rescuer Michael Sehr told
 news agency DPA
 Photos of the rat showed its head and rotund torso poking out of the hole,
 with its bottom half obscured by the sewer cover. In one image it seemed to
 almost be calling for hilfe.
 The fire brigade said the rat escaped unhurt.

 "The animal was subsequently released again into the wild. The fire
 department's operation was completed after a good 25 minutes," said the
 Auerbach fire department.
 After the successful rescue, two young girls presented the animal rescue teanm
 with a gift to say thank you- a drawing of a rat surrounded by love hearts
 with the word "danke!" written on it.
 Sehr told DPA he did not have any qualms about rescuing the rat.
 "Even animals that are hated by many people deserve respect," he said.
True story

True story

Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again… I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything… We’ve been here before. It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe.
Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die

they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again…


I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything…
We’ve been here before.
It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe.

biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weave...