🔥 | Latest

Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s A dating service where matching is based on people's search history exists. You're a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer. endreams-s Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it? Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart attack Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: "sucks in a breath ok fangoddess817 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes Writer, already bringing a ring out: "shaking thanks infinityonthot A++ addition tetsuskitten Writer: "shows the serial killer the murder scene they're writing actually work? babe, i'm not sure if this would Serial killer: "kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great tigerliliesandcherryblossoms ILOVE THIS vmohlere Oh no, murder comedy is my jam laziestofthedreamers Ilove this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gulible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it's completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work. Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that a detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there's something to the theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author's home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries. So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he'll FINALLY have proof. annieutimagines Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer." Serial killer breaths in. "Look-" ladyhavilliard ..perfect theskystealerthebookthief I need 4 seasons and a movie on this I would watch the hell out of this
Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s
 A dating service where matching is based on
 people's search history exists. You're a serial killer.
 You go on a date with a writer.
 endreams-s
 Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill
 someone, how would you do it?
 Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart
 attack
 Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: "sucks in
 a breath ok
 fangoddess817
 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to
 potentially stab someone in the guts
 Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes
 Writer, already bringing a ring out: "shaking thanks
 infinityonthot
 A++ addition
 tetsuskitten
 Writer: "shows the serial killer the murder scene
 they're writing
 actually work?
 babe, i'm not sure if this would
 Serial killer: "kisses writer on the forehead and
 leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood
 coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great
 tigerliliesandcherryblossoms
 ILOVE THIS
 vmohlere
 Oh no, murder comedy is my jam
 laziestofthedreamers
 Ilove this, I love all of this, but quick question, does
 the author know? Like are they aware that their
 significant other is a serial killer or do they just think
 that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even
 funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how
 Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly
 gulible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime
 novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop
 or something so it's completely normal for them to
 come home smelling like blood, no murders going on
 here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home
 from a long day at work.
 Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed
 to get their first book published, with loving support
 from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all
 the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that
 a detective with the local police department has
 noticed some disturbing similarities to several active
 cases, including details that were never released to
 the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior
 and convinces him that there's something to the
 theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes
 out the author's home and is super convinced that
 the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do
 anything??? Like they literally are at the house all
 day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries.
 So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the
 author for creative murder schemes, the author
 being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and
 finally the detective who is just so sure that the
 author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long
 enough he'll FINALLY have proof.
 annieutimagines
 Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go
 out so it gets sub what personal.
 "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a
 serial killer."
 Serial killer breaths in. "Look-"
 ladyhavilliard
 ..perfect
 theskystealerthebookthief
 I need 4 seasons and a movie on this
I would watch the hell out of this

I would watch the hell out of this

Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes
Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 3:24 PM
 Dad
 I've got some bad news. Kitty
 has been missing since last
 night. When your mom drove
 the neighborhood just now,
 she found her in the street
 near the house. Your mom is
 pretty emotional so please
 reach out when you can and
 offer your support
 Oh no. So sorry to hear this
 Sister
 Man. Just got off the phone
 with her-she's definitely very
 broken up about it. Give her
 our love in person when you
 get home, dad. And be sure
 to get the woman her
 groceries. Love you guys!
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 5:38 PM
 Dad
 Well your not going to believe
 this. After a beautiful burial
 service and words of
 remembrance from yours
 truly. We walked back in the
 house to begin our post-Kitty
 life. Out of habit I looked out
 the back window and guess
 who was staring back at me?
 You guessed it. We buried
 someone else's cat. I gues:s
 it's true-cats do have nine
 lives. Thanks for y
 words. All is better now.
 our kind
 Sister
 is this forreal?!
 Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 ィ。
 78%
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Sister
 YES
 What the actual fuck
 Sister
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 12:35 PM
 8 73%
 Messages Mom
 Details
 Today 12:34 PM
 Oh, and BTW, I dug up the
 carcass and took it to our vet
 and it didn't have a chip in it.
 Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT
 tell the world about this.
 Message
 A S D F G H J K L
 123
 space
 return
roaringstream:

thecommonchick:

THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂

“Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes

roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes

Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes
Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 3:24 PM
 Dad
 I've got some bad news. Kitty
 has been missing since last
 night. When your mom drove
 the neighborhood just now,
 she found her in the street
 near the house. Your mom is
 pretty emotional so please
 reach out when you can and
 offer your support
 Oh no. So sorry to hear this
 Sister
 Man. Just got off the phone
 with her-she's definitely very
 broken up about it. Give her
 our love in person when you
 get home, dad. And be sure
 to get the woman her
 groceries. Love you guys!
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 5:38 PM
 Dad
 Well your not going to believe
 this. After a beautiful burial
 service and words of
 remembrance from yours
 truly. We walked back in the
 house to begin our post-Kitty
 life. Out of habit I looked out
 the back window and guess
 who was staring back at me?
 You guessed it. We buried
 someone else's cat. I gues:s
 it's true-cats do have nine
 lives. Thanks for y
 words. All is better now.
 our kind
 Sister
 is this forreal?!
 Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 ィ。
 78%
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Sister
 YES
 What the actual fuck
 Sister
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 12:35 PM
 8 73%
 Messages Mom
 Details
 Today 12:34 PM
 Oh, and BTW, I dug up the
 carcass and took it to our vet
 and it didn't have a chip in it.
 Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT
 tell the world about this.
 Message
 A S D F G H J K L
 123
 space
 return
roaringstream:
thecommonchick:

THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂

“Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes

roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes

Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return goatyellsateverything: roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes It didnt have a chip BECAUSE ITS A RABBIT! *DYING* Man how broken up do you gotta be to mistake a rabbit body for a cat? 😂😂😂
Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 3:24 PM
 Dad
 I've got some bad news. Kitty
 has been missing since last
 night. When your mom drove
 the neighborhood just now,
 she found her in the street
 near the house. Your mom is
 pretty emotional so please
 reach out when you can and
 offer your support
 Oh no. So sorry to hear this
 Sister
 Man. Just got off the phone
 with her-she's definitely very
 broken up about it. Give her
 our love in person when you
 get home, dad. And be sure
 to get the woman her
 groceries. Love you guys!
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Yesterday 5:38 PM
 Dad
 Well your not going to believe
 this. After a beautiful burial
 service and words of
 remembrance from yours
 truly. We walked back in the
 house to begin our post-Kitty
 life. Out of habit I looked out
 the back window and guess
 who was staring back at me?
 You guessed it. We buried
 someone else's cat. I gues:s
 it's true-cats do have nine
 lives. Thanks for y
 words. All is better now.
 our kind
 Sister
 is this forreal?!
 Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 9:06 AM
 ィ。
 78%
 Messages Group MMS
 Details
 To: Sister, Dad
 Would you like a photo?
 Sister
 YES
 What the actual fuck
 Sister
 Text Message
 Send

 oo Verizon
 12:35 PM
 8 73%
 Messages Mom
 Details
 Today 12:34 PM
 Oh, and BTW, I dug up the
 carcass and took it to our vet
 and it didn't have a chip in it.
 Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT
 tell the world about this.
 Message
 A S D F G H J K L
 123
 space
 return
goatyellsateverything:

roaringstream:

thecommonchick:

THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂

“Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes


It didnt have a chip BECAUSE ITS A RABBIT! *DYING*

Man how broken up do you gotta be to mistake a rabbit body for a cat? 😂😂😂

goatyellsateverything: roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes It didnt hav...