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Anaconda, Betty White, and Chris Evans: bundibird: wrangletangle: stevenrogered: Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win Okay listen up, all you dudes out there! It鈥檚 time for some life lessons from Chris Evans. Wonder why women are fine with this when he does it, but they find you opening a car door or offering to carry stuff for them annoying? Well, wonder no more! It works like this: A large number of women have had to learn how to dodge and swerve and sometimes even slap away men鈥檚 hands from the time they hit puberty - and sometimes before. Ladies, cis and trans both, are unfortunately experienced at being groped, poked, prodded, 鈥渉elped鈥, and otherwise humiliated and threatened by men. Then also there鈥檚 the condescending attitude that of course we need a man鈥檚 help, and we should be grateful he offered it. No thanks. Chris is doing something very different here, and you鈥檒l see it in similar video clips of him at other events. You can read his mental process in his body language. He starts with just clapping and congratulating. He offers nothing until there is a need, which doesn鈥檛 happen here until Regina鈥檚 shoe gets caught on her dress. Since women have literally tripped up the stairs at this ceremony several times over the years (because the shoe and clothing requirements are ridiculous), it is reasonable at this stage to think that my-shoe-caught-on-my-dress is a problem that actually needs to be addressed. This is when Chris offers. How he offers matters. He starts with an open hand toward her, but this is a big no-no. Open hands are a red flag. Open hands grope and grab and shove. He quickly corrects by flipping his arm over and offering his forearm instead. This makes it her choice whether to grab on or ignore him. She doesn鈥檛 have to contend with a potentially threatening hand while she鈥檚 also contending with her dress. He also bends down a bit to do this. I don鈥檛 know if you鈥檝e noticed, but Chris is kind of a tall, beefy guy. Guys like that can be a bit intimidating without meaning to be, at least when they鈥檙e up close. Also, his arm is a bit too high to be useful to her if he stays at his full height. So he bends down. This is even more visible in the video from him doing this for Betty White at the 2015 Oscars, because she鈥檚 shorter than Regina, I guess. He offers his arm for exactly as long as she leans on it. When she lets go, he steps back. This is a guy who isn鈥檛 interested in showing off how much she needs his help. He鈥檚 just interested in helping, and when he鈥檚 not needed, he鈥檚 done. He goes back to sit down. He doesn鈥檛 hover. Also, Regina King knows who Chris Evans is. His behavior at work thus far has certainly made it into the rumor mill, thus factoring into whether she accepts help from him. Is he a dudebro or jerk to women at work? That doesn鈥檛 appear to be the case. Women are not helpless. Compared to men, our clothes are more often obstacles to getting where we need to go safely and with our dignity intact, but conversely, we鈥檝e also learned to deal with that better than most men have. It鈥檚 not that we never need or want help; like all people, we do sometimes need a hand. It鈥檚 just that 鈥渟ome kinds of help are the kinds of help we all could do without.鈥 If you are offering help to a woman, first make sure she actually appears to be struggling. Second, make yourself as unthreatening as possible and let her do any touching, not the other way around. Third, make sure she can refuse without any consequences. And fourth, back off as soon as she doesn鈥檛 need you anymore and let the moment go. I hadn鈥檛 even registered why exactly it was that he was so unthreatening in this and the Betty White assistance incidents, but you鈥檙e right. It鈥檚 all in the way he helps. It鈥檚 not that this is unthreatening behaviour 鈥渂ecause he鈥檚 Chris Evans鈥 鈥 its because his body language is genuinely unthreatening and merely helpful. A+ analysis 鈥 I hadn鈥檛 even registered the details of why and how this behaviour was 100% ok, while from another man (who probably would have gone about it differentky) it might not have been
Anaconda, Betty White, and Chris Evans: bundibird:

wrangletangle:

stevenrogered:
Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win
Okay listen up, all you dudes out there! It鈥檚 time for some life lessons from Chris Evans.
Wonder why women are fine with this when he does it, but they find you opening a car door or offering to carry stuff for them annoying? Well, wonder no more! It works like this:
A large number of women have had to learn how to dodge and swerve and sometimes even slap away men鈥檚 hands from the time they hit puberty - and sometimes before. Ladies, cis and trans both, are unfortunately experienced at being groped, poked, prodded, 鈥渉elped鈥, and otherwise humiliated and threatened by men. Then also there鈥檚 the condescending attitude that of course we need a man鈥檚 help, and we should be grateful he offered it. 
No thanks.
Chris is doing something very different here, and you鈥檒l see it in similar video clips of him at other events. You can read his mental process in his body language. He starts with just clapping and congratulating. He offers nothing until there is a need, which doesn鈥檛 happen here until Regina鈥檚 shoe gets caught on her dress. Since women have literally tripped up the stairs at this ceremony several times over the years (because the shoe and clothing requirements are ridiculous), it is reasonable at this stage to think that my-shoe-caught-on-my-dress is a problem that actually needs to be addressed. This is when Chris offers.
How he offers matters. He starts with an open hand toward her, but this is a big no-no. Open hands are a red flag. Open hands grope and grab and shove. He quickly corrects by flipping his arm over and offering his forearm instead. This makes it her choice whether to grab on or ignore him. She doesn鈥檛 have to contend with a potentially threatening hand while she鈥檚 also contending with her dress. 
He also bends down a bit to do this. I don鈥檛 know if you鈥檝e noticed, but Chris is kind of a tall, beefy guy. Guys like that can be a bit intimidating without meaning to be, at least when they鈥檙e up close. Also, his arm is a bit too high to be useful to her if he stays at his full height. So he bends down. This is even more visible in the video from him doing this for Betty White at the 2015 Oscars, because she鈥檚 shorter than Regina, I guess.
He offers his arm for exactly as long as she leans on it. When she lets go, he steps back. This is a guy who isn鈥檛 interested in showing off how much she needs his help. He鈥檚 just interested in helping, and when he鈥檚 not needed, he鈥檚 done. He goes back to sit down. He doesn鈥檛 hover.
Also, Regina King knows who Chris Evans is. His behavior at work thus far has certainly made it into the rumor mill, thus factoring into whether she accepts help from him. Is he a dudebro or jerk to women at work? That doesn鈥檛 appear to be the case.
Women are not helpless. Compared to men, our clothes are more often obstacles to getting where we need to go safely and with our dignity intact, but conversely, we鈥檝e also learned to deal with that better than most men have. It鈥檚 not that we never need or want help; like all people, we do sometimes need a hand. It鈥檚 just that 鈥渟ome kinds of help are the kinds of help we all could do without.鈥
If you are offering help to a woman, first make sure she actually appears to be struggling. Second, make yourself as unthreatening as possible and let her do any touching, not the other way around. Third, make sure she can refuse without any consequences. And fourth, back off as soon as she doesn鈥檛 need you anymore and let the moment go.


I hadn鈥檛 even registered why exactly it was that he was so unthreatening in this and the Betty White assistance incidents, but you鈥檙e right. It鈥檚 all in the way he helps. It鈥檚 not that this is unthreatening behaviour 鈥渂ecause he鈥檚 Chris Evans鈥 鈥 its because his body language is genuinely unthreatening and merely helpful. 
A+ analysis 鈥 I hadn鈥檛 even registered the details of why and how this behaviour was 100% ok, while from another man (who probably would have gone about it differentky) it might not have been

bundibird: wrangletangle: stevenrogered: Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win Okay listen up, all...

Tumblr, Blog, and Http: frnko-mars: January 9, 2019聽by Katie Clare
Tumblr, Blog, and Http: frnko-mars:
January 9, 2019聽by Katie Clare

frnko-mars: January 9, 2019聽by Katie Clare