Hey Girl


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    

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    Hey Girl: snarling-through-our-smiles
 I once lost my keys at a frat house.
 My drunk ass had actually walked home
 without them, pounded on my apartment
 door, gotten let in by my rightfully-
 disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to
 pass out on the couch. Apparently I
 puked in the toilet before passing out
 do not remember
 The next morning, I schlepped back to the
 frat house. I stood there, right in front of
 the front door. This was a novel
 experience for me. I'd never been at a frat
 house in broad daylight before.
 A boy, presumably, of the house, asked
 me what I was doing.
 "I lost my keys in here last night, I called
 back. "I was seeing if I could go in and
 look for them?"
 He opened the door and gestured for me
 o come in.
 "Go wherever you want."
 I'd never seen a frat house post-party
 Derore. Wandering up the stairs a
 by
 hungover and still-drunk frat boys
 sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food
 and showers like moths to a porch light.
 A few of them threw puzzled glances my
 way. I'm sure they thought I was some
 post-bacchanalia hallucination.
 I entered one room where a boy was
 drunkenly watching some Old Yeller-
 esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of
 his room from his bed.
 "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice
 from the fact that his face was squished
 against his pillow and half-buried by his
 blanket.
 I told him I did.
 e mumbled again, pleased, and asked
 what I was doing. I told him I was looking
 my keys.
 "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around
 bere
 I didn't doubt him.
 Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched
 just about every bedroom and nuclear-
 at dumn-site of a bathroom in that
 house. I'd given up on ever finding my
 keys and was prepared to beg my
 roommates' forgiveness and get a new
 set copied.
 As I stood there in the hallway, silently
 a particularly
 burly frat boy approached me.
 "You need help with something?
 "I lost my keys here last night and I can't
 find them, I've looked everywhere.
 "What do they look like? I'll put it into the
 group chat. He was already pulling out
 his phone.
 No one ever checks a group chat, I
 thought, but what the hell. It was worth a
 shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The
 keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like
 yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss
 He nodded, presumably typing this
 description faithfully into the group chat.
 "Alright, I sent the message out. Good
 luck.
 e turned and left.
 And with that,
 A few moments later, I heard a distant
 and it was getting louder and louder, One
 assumes that how I felt in that moment
 was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest
 stampede through the ravine as a horde
 large young men all thundered down
 the stairs, making a beeling for me.
 "Someone tell the girl!" One of them
 shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey,
 GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!!
 They circled around me. I hadn't felt that
 old, One of them split himself off from
 the crowd.
 "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys
 from his pocket, "your keys?
 And lo, there was the distinctive bright
 millennial pink cat keychain dangling off
 the ring.
 "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes."
 "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
 YYYYYYYYYY!!"
 The cheer went up.
 Turns out he found them in the bathroom
 upstairs. I thanked them again profusely.
 There was a scattered round of "no
 problems" and then, just
 suddenly as
 they descended, they all dispersed, like
 ships in the night.
 gatorfisch
 THIS is boys will be boys
Nice Frathouse
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Hey Girl: snarling-through-our-smiles
 I once lost my keys at a frat house.
 My drunk ass had actually walked home
 without them, pounded on my apartment
 door, gotten let in by my rightfully-
 disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to
 pass out on the couch. Apparently I
 puked in the toilet before passing out
 do not remember
 The next morning, I schlepped back to the
 frat house. I stood there, right in front of
 the front door. This was a novel
 experience for me. I'd never been at a frat
 house in broad daylight before.
 A boy, presumably, of the house, asked
 me what I was doing.
 "I lost my keys in here last night, I called
 back. "I was seeing if I could go in and
 look for them?"
 He opened the door and gestured for me
 o come in.
 "Go wherever you want."
 I'd never seen a frat house post-party
 Derore. Wandering up the stairs a
 by
 hungover and still-drunk frat boys
 sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food
 and showers like moths to a porch light.
 A few of them threw puzzled glances my
 way. I'm sure they thought I was some
 post-bacchanalia hallucination.
 I entered one room where a boy was
 drunkenly watching some Old Yeller-
 esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of
 his room from his bed.
 "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice
 from the fact that his face was squished
 against his pillow and half-buried by his
 blanket.
 I told him I did.
 e mumbled again, pleased, and asked
 what I was doing. I told him I was looking
 my keys.
 "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around
 bere
 I didn't doubt him.
 Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched
 just about every bedroom and nuclear-
 at dumn-site of a bathroom in that
 house. I'd given up on ever finding my
 keys and was prepared to beg my
 roommates' forgiveness and get a new
 set copied.
 As I stood there in the hallway, silently
 a particularly
 burly frat boy approached me.
 "You need help with something?
 "I lost my keys here last night and I can't
 find them, I've looked everywhere.
 "What do they look like? I'll put it into the
 group chat. He was already pulling out
 his phone.
 No one ever checks a group chat, I
 thought, but what the hell. It was worth a
 shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The
 keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like
 yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss
 He nodded, presumably typing this
 description faithfully into the group chat.
 "Alright, I sent the message out. Good
 luck.
 e turned and left.
 And with that,
 A few moments later, I heard a distant
 and it was getting louder and louder, One
 assumes that how I felt in that moment
 was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest
 stampede through the ravine as a horde
 large young men all thundered down
 the stairs, making a beeling for me.
 "Someone tell the girl!" One of them
 shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey,
 GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!!
 They circled around me. I hadn't felt that
 old, One of them split himself off from
 the crowd.
 "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys
 from his pocket, "your keys?
 And lo, there was the distinctive bright
 millennial pink cat keychain dangling off
 the ring.
 "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes."
 "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
 YYYYYYYYYY!!"
 The cheer went up.
 Turns out he found them in the bathroom
 upstairs. I thanked them again profusely.
 There was a scattered round of "no
 problems" and then, just
 suddenly as
 they descended, they all dispersed, like
 ships in the night.
 gatorfisch
 THIS is boys will be boys
Nice Frathouse
                
            

            
            
Nice Frathouse

            
            
        

    



        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            







    Hey Girl: Sprint LTE
 8:17 PM
 * 31%(10
 Home (3)
 Active now
 This might seem
 Hey
 totally random but I'm curious.
 What do you know about Pure
 Therapeutic Ketones and ketosis?
 Hey! I am diabetic. Ketones is
 byproduct of your body burning
 through fat. Once the fat is gone it
 starts burning your protein. Which is
 what your muscles and organs are
 made of. People who do the keto diet
 have to replace what is lost by the
 diet. That's why it's so fatty and
 protein based. People who are on it
 for too long can have kidney, liver
 heart, lung, and muscle damage
 Ketosis is what a lot of diabetic die
 from
 I don't diet. I portion control and eat
 healthy.
 Carbs are necessary for proper
 bodily functions.
 As a nurse you should know that.

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25% @ }
 Home (3)
 Active now
 Hey girl, you seem to be really
 knowledgeable about this which is
 really awesome! Let me connect
 you with my friend Christen. She's
 a nurse and she has been drinking
 ketones for a really long time! She
 would totally be able to answer
 any questions you have. Are you
 open to that?
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25%
 KHome (3) ctive
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information
 because they are capitalizing on
 permanent damage and death for
 their own financial gain. People
 blindly start these diets without
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.

 I Sprint LTE ※
 9:12 PM
 ア* 23%
 a
 KHome (2)
 C0
 Active now
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.
 Ketosis and ketoacidosis are two
 totally different things. We are
 actually born in ketosis and stay
 that way until we are introduced to
 a traditional American diet. I totally
 respect your opinion though
 They are not. Ask a doctor like I did.
 Google it actually. Ketones put your
 body into a state of ketoacidosis
 Which is exactly what causes all of
 that. Americans need to stop eating
 processed foods and eating healthy.
 Plus getting up and being active is
 important to a
 balanced and healthy lifestyle.
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated.

 Sprint LTE
 9:21 PM
 Home (2)
 Active now
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated
 https:/thcliphd.com/video
 clip-516648776d4f4243676f464
 5
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 Clip Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video clip
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 720
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 1080,
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 thcliphd.com
 I don't care. Shut up and go the fuck
 away. I thought you'd get that shit
 with the first response. Go away. Far
 away.
 00四0 Aa
Gotta love MLM's
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Hey Girl: Sprint LTE
 8:17 PM
 * 31%(10
 Home (3)
 Active now
 This might seem
 Hey
 totally random but I'm curious.
 What do you know about Pure
 Therapeutic Ketones and ketosis?
 Hey! I am diabetic. Ketones is
 byproduct of your body burning
 through fat. Once the fat is gone it
 starts burning your protein. Which is
 what your muscles and organs are
 made of. People who do the keto diet
 have to replace what is lost by the
 diet. That's why it's so fatty and
 protein based. People who are on it
 for too long can have kidney, liver
 heart, lung, and muscle damage
 Ketosis is what a lot of diabetic die
 from
 I don't diet. I portion control and eat
 healthy.
 Carbs are necessary for proper
 bodily functions.
 As a nurse you should know that.

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25% @ }
 Home (3)
 Active now
 Hey girl, you seem to be really
 knowledgeable about this which is
 really awesome! Let me connect
 you with my friend Christen. She's
 a nurse and she has been drinking
 ketones for a really long time! She
 would totally be able to answer
 any questions you have. Are you
 open to that?
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information

 Sprint LTE
 9:02 PM
 * 25%
 KHome (3) ctive
 Do you know what diabetic
 ketoacidosis is? I do. And it's from
 ketones. I was in the icu and almost
 died from it. My body was shutting
 down and if my friend wouldn't have
 brought me to the Er I would have
 gone into cardiac arrest and died at
 home with no help. I'm not the
 person to sell that stuff to. I can pull
 up numerous articles that actually
 have real statistics and medical proof
 backing up what this fad diet does to
 the human body. Liver failure, kidney
 failure, blindness, amputations of
 extremities, heart failure, neuropathy,
 and much much more. No one wants
 people researching this information
 because they are capitalizing on
 permanent damage and death for
 their own financial gain. People
 blindly start these diets without
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.

 I Sprint LTE ※
 9:12 PM
 ア* 23%
 a
 KHome (2)
 C0
 Active now
 researching them. It will take years
 off of the lives of a lot of people and
 that means less time with the ones
 they love. I do not advocate the diet.
 But thank you for trying.
 Ketosis and ketoacidosis are two
 totally different things. We are
 actually born in ketosis and stay
 that way until we are introduced to
 a traditional American diet. I totally
 respect your opinion though
 They are not. Ask a doctor like I did.
 Google it actually. Ketones put your
 body into a state of ketoacidosis
 Which is exactly what causes all of
 that. Americans need to stop eating
 processed foods and eating healthy.
 Plus getting up and being active is
 important to a
 balanced and healthy lifestyle.
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated.

 Sprint LTE
 9:21 PM
 Home (2)
 Active now
 Americans are fooled by what's
 advertised and what's easy. As a
 consumer, it is our responsibility to
 be educated
 https:/thcliphd.com/video
 clip-516648776d4f4243676f464
 5
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 Clip Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis, video clip
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 720
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis 1080,
 Ketosis vs Diabetic Ketoacidosis
 thcliphd.com
 I don't care. Shut up and go the fuck
 away. I thought you'd get that shit
 with the first response. Go away. Far
 away.
 00四0 Aa
Gotta love MLM's
                
            

            
            
Gotta love MLM's