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Facts, Food, and Growing Up: A teaspoon of honey represents the life work of 12 bees. rainnecassidy: congenitalprogramming: cotestuck: montypla: meloromantics: appropriately-inappropriate: audreyvhorne: sttinkerbelle: vmpolung: knowledgeandlove: Photo source Fact check source #and I just don’t feel entitled to someone else’s life’s work. That comment exactly!! It’s not mine and I can survive without it, so I will. This is why honey is not vegan. The problem here is that honey, especially if you buy it ethically from an apiarist, isn’t actually detrimental to the well-being of the bee or the hive. In the wild, honey is used as a food stock, but in a domesticated honeybee colony, the bees are fed quite well, and so the honey is a surplus. The alternatives, like sugar, relies on monocrops in third world countries, with transient labour. Growing up, there was a sugarcane field by my house, and I’m sure the Haitian men who worked backbreaking hours hacking a machete through knife-bladed leaves in 40 degree heat for a couple dollars a day would have traded a testicle to be a Canadian honeybee. Stevia’s going the same way, iirc. Additionally, apiarists are actually huge proponents and activists for sustainable bee-keeping, and it’s estimated that the domesticated hive may be the last great hope for declining populations, because we can optimize their chances for survival. It’s their life’s work, sure, but it’s not the death of them to use it responsibly. literally read anything about the history of sugarcane and the cuban sugar industry if you think sugar is or ever has been more ethical than honey Beekeepers- Provide a home for the bees Keep that home warm in the winter Keep the bees well fed, negating the need for honey, which the bees would make anyways Still do not take all the honey, just in case Protect the bees from predators Monitor the hives for any signs of the parasites, diseases, etc. that cause colony collapse disorder Their bees- Provide a valuable and reliable source of pollination for plants in the area, both wild and crops Help keep the local ecosystem healthy Honey- Is one of the healthiest things you can eat Is able to keep for a EXTREMELY long time (Millennia even), making it more valuable than many perishable foods without being full of preservatives Can be used to soothe sore throats, nauseau, etc. Has been eaten by humans since at least Ancient Egypt (We’ve found STILL EDIBLE honey in tombs) Is a great tool in cooking, adding sweetness without raising the sugar content much Is a staple food in many people’s diets Honey is amazing you can put it on or in pretty much everything I goddamn love it and you should too. Honey is also a natural antimicrobial that has been used medicinally since time out of mind on external wounds like edible neosporin. Particularly useful in the treatment of dermal abcesses. “oh no we steal it from the bees!”*has no problem benefiting from exploited migrant farm workers* ^^^
Facts, Food, and Growing Up: A teaspoon of honey represents the life
 work of 12 bees.
rainnecassidy:

congenitalprogramming:

cotestuck:

montypla:

meloromantics:

appropriately-inappropriate:

audreyvhorne:

sttinkerbelle:

vmpolung:

knowledgeandlove:

Photo source
Fact check source

#and I just don’t feel entitled to someone else’s life’s work.

That comment exactly!! It’s not mine and I can survive without it, so I will.

This is why honey is not vegan.

The problem here is that honey, especially if you buy it ethically from an apiarist, isn’t actually detrimental to the well-being of the bee or the hive. In the wild, honey is used as a food stock, but in a domesticated honeybee colony, the bees are fed quite well, and so the honey is a surplus.
The alternatives, like sugar, relies on monocrops in third world countries, with transient labour. Growing up, there was a sugarcane field by my house, and I’m sure the Haitian men who worked backbreaking hours hacking a machete through knife-bladed leaves in 40 degree heat for a couple dollars a day would have traded a testicle to be a Canadian honeybee. Stevia’s going the same way, iirc.
Additionally, apiarists are actually huge proponents and activists for sustainable bee-keeping, and it’s estimated that the domesticated hive may be the last great hope for declining populations, because we can optimize their chances for survival.
It’s their life’s work, sure, but it’s not the death of them to use it responsibly.

literally read anything about the history of sugarcane and the cuban sugar industry if you think sugar is or ever has been more ethical than honey

Beekeepers-
Provide a home for the bees
Keep that home warm in the winter
Keep the bees well fed, negating the need for honey, which the bees would make anyways
Still do not take all the honey, just in case
Protect the bees from predators
Monitor the hives for any signs of the parasites, diseases, etc. that cause colony collapse disorder
Their bees-
Provide a valuable and reliable source of pollination for plants in the area, both wild and crops
Help keep the local ecosystem healthy
Honey-
Is one of the healthiest things you can eat
Is able to keep for a EXTREMELY long time (Millennia even), making it more valuable than many perishable foods without being full of preservatives
Can be used to soothe sore throats, nauseau, etc.
Has been eaten by humans since at least Ancient Egypt (We’ve found STILL EDIBLE honey in tombs)
Is a great tool in cooking, adding sweetness without raising the sugar content much
Is a staple food in many people’s diets
Honey is amazing you can put it on or in pretty much everything I goddamn love it and you should too.


Honey is also a natural antimicrobial that has been used medicinally since time out of mind on external wounds like edible neosporin.
Particularly useful in the treatment of dermal abcesses.


“oh no we steal it from the bees!”*has no problem benefiting from exploited migrant farm workers*


^^^

rainnecassidy: congenitalprogramming: cotestuck: montypla: meloromantics: appropriately-inappropriate: audreyvhorne: sttinkerbelle: ...

Target, Tumblr, and Vision: Ppl will go to the library and pull out their laptop, textbook, agenda, multicoloured pens, 2 calculators and a large coffee just to sit there like this for 2 hours carpeted: beyoncescock: pepethefrogblog: beyoncescock: this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr while taking random quizzes like how much common sense do you have which i dont need to take cause i probably have none nice self burn now where do you get those stupid quizzes cause i need something to distract me from my research paper im in class and i productively gathered my fave quizzes for you instead of listening to my professor ramble about machine learning How much common sense do you actually have?** (i got 8/11) Take this vision test and we’ll guess what color your eyes are These 18 questions will tell you what dog breed you’re compatible with** Your choice of words will determine what age you belong to We can guess your soulmate’s name based on these questions about your exes What nationality are you according to your personality?** Can we guess where you actually live? Most Americans can’t score 10/12 on this state geography test. Can you? Only 1% of people can name these everyday things** (i got 8/18) Can we guess where you grew up based on your taste in snacks? Take this test to see how you’ll most likely die** **my favorites picks rihannna just in case
Target, Tumblr, and Vision: Ppl will go to the library and pull out their
 laptop, textbook, agenda, multicoloured
 pens, 2 calculators and a large coffee
 just to sit there like this for 2 hours
carpeted:
beyoncescock:

pepethefrogblog:

beyoncescock:


this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr while taking random quizzes like how much common sense do you have which i dont need to take cause i probably have none
nice self burn now where do you get those stupid quizzes cause i need something to distract me from my research paper

im in class and i productively gathered my fave quizzes for you instead of listening to my professor ramble about machine learning

How much common sense do you actually have?** (i got 8/11)

Take this vision test and we’ll guess what color your eyes are

These 18 questions will tell you what dog breed you’re compatible with**
Your choice of words will determine what age you belong to
We can guess your soulmate’s name based on these questions about your exes

What nationality are you according to your personality?**

Can we guess where you actually live?
Most Americans can’t score 10/12 on this state geography test. Can you?

Only 1% of people can name these everyday things** (i got 8/18)

Can we guess where you grew up based on your taste in snacks?

Take this test to see how you’ll most likely die**

**my favorites

picks rihannna just in case

carpeted: beyoncescock: pepethefrogblog: beyoncescock: this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr whil...

Head, Tumblr, and Vine: Rose Quartz Shield Tutorial! Easy, Cheap, Lightweight, and Fast From Makelovely Cosplay -TRUSTED QUALITY SINCE 192 RUSTOLEUM ULTRA COVER FLAT WHITE PRIMER TIGHT BOND FOR A TOPr OGEST LASTING ALSO BONDS TO のritz 1" x 2.5 yds (254 m" x22 WOOD, METAL & MORE 400 NET Materials: The key ingredient behind this magical project are these! Drum head covers are super lightweight easily painted, and come in a big range of sizes. Plus, they're pretty much the perfect shape for a round shield, and they're pretty cheap too! You'll also need - Primer(I swear by Rustoleum's 2X Ultra Cover for plastic, but whatever sticks to plastic is good!) &Spray paint -Elastic E6000 -A bunch of paper An exacto knife -Acrylic paints & paint brushes -Some sort of sealant n between coats: Map out your design! started with a bunch of pieces of paper taped together and traced the outline of First up: Prime your drum head (2 coats just in case!) and spray paint your color of choice (2 coats again!) l used Valspar's Gloss in Frosty Berry. I'm not super fond of it, but tro was the right color and I had it on hand! tit the drum head. The design itself was mostly free handed, but it did take a little trial and error before I got it just right. Trace this over with marker to make for easier cutting This is the most tedious part: tracing the design onto your shield! I cut mine out piece by piece, starting with the gem design, then the thorns, and then the vine. Just line everything up with what you've already traced as you go! Be careful at the edges! Since they're sloped, they might need a little alteration from your original lines. Now just paint all your traced designs in with acrylics (mine took 2 coats for the darker colors and 3 for the white) and give your shield a good clear coat to protect from chipping! For carrying, I used some E6000 to attach some elastic straps. You wanna glue the crap out of these things, put plenty underneath and some on top (it'll soak into the elastic) just in case! I used one big strap for my arm, and I held onto the smaller one, and it was pretty comfy all day Now get out there and defend the earth makelovelycosplay: Here’s how I made my Rose Quartz shield! It’s real easy and should work pretty well for any sort of round shield. Feel free to message me if you have any questions!
Head, Tumblr, and Vine: Rose Quartz Shield Tutorial!
 Easy, Cheap, Lightweight, and Fast
 From Makelovely Cosplay
 -TRUSTED QUALITY SINCE 192
 RUSTOLEUM
 ULTRA COVER
 FLAT WHITE
 PRIMER
 TIGHT BOND FOR A TOPr
 OGEST LASTING
 ALSO BONDS TO
 のritz
 1" x 2.5 yds (254 m" x22
 WOOD, METAL & MORE
 400 NET
 Materials: The key ingredient behind
 this magical project are these! Drum
 head covers are super lightweight
 easily painted, and come in a big
 range of sizes. Plus, they're pretty
 much the perfect shape for a round
 shield, and they're pretty cheap too!
 You'll also need
 - Primer(I swear by Rustoleum's 2X Ultra
 Cover for plastic, but whatever sticks to
 plastic is good!) &Spray paint
 -Elastic
 E6000
 -A bunch of paper
 An exacto knife
 -Acrylic paints & paint brushes
 -Some sort of sealant

 n between coats: Map out your design!
 started with a bunch of pieces of paper
 taped together and traced the outline of
 First up: Prime your drum head (2
 coats just in case!) and spray paint
 your color of choice (2 coats again!)
 l used Valspar's Gloss in Frosty
 Berry. I'm not super fond of it, but tro
 was the right color and I had it on
 hand!
 tit
 the drum head. The design itself was
 mostly free handed, but it did take a little
 trial and error before I got it just
 right. Trace this over with marker to make
 for easier cutting
 This is the most tedious part: tracing the design onto your shield! I cut mine out
 piece by piece, starting with the gem design, then the thorns, and then the vine.
 Just line everything up with what you've already traced as you go! Be careful at the
 edges! Since they're sloped, they might need a little alteration from your original
 lines.

 Now just paint all your traced designs in with acrylics (mine took 2 coats for the
 darker colors and 3 for the white) and give your shield a good clear coat to
 protect from chipping!
 For carrying, I used some E6000 to attach some elastic straps. You wanna glue
 the crap out of these things, put plenty underneath and some on top (it'll soak
 into the elastic) just in case! I used one big strap for my arm, and I held onto the
 smaller one, and it was pretty comfy all day
 Now get out there and defend the earth
makelovelycosplay:

Here’s how I made my Rose Quartz shield! It’s real easy and should work pretty well for any sort of round shield. Feel free to message me if you have any questions!

makelovelycosplay: Here’s how I made my Rose Quartz shield! It’s real easy and should work pretty well for any sort of round shield. Feel f...

Alive, Anaconda, and Animals: i-should-be-writing-rn: inlovewithaleheather: thecuckoohaslanded: gerbthenerd: alexander-lamington: thelizardprincess: biglawbear: blacksirencry: swaglexander-the-great: #That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit  me tryna find out if this fool died “The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.” Holy shit And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!! Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this #AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS  I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN. There are many things that will kill you. [citation needed] There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST. There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in. Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN. Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus. It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish. The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the LD50 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you. DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS. Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE. A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND. Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough. I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin: “Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.” “The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.” Remember how the LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.   I DID SOME MATH.   IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.) Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.” THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY. And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria. Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine. Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE. IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST. And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death. Don’t touch the pretty shells. I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have. You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌
Alive, Anaconda, and Animals: i-should-be-writing-rn:

inlovewithaleheather:

thecuckoohaslanded:


gerbthenerd:

alexander-lamington:


thelizardprincess:


biglawbear:


blacksirencry:

swaglexander-the-great:


#That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit 
me tryna find out if this fool died


“The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.”
Holy shit


And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore


Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!!


Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this



#AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS 
I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN.
There are many things that will kill you.

[citation needed]
There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST.
There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in.
Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN.
Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus.
It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish.
The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the 

LD50

 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you.
DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS.
Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE.
A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND.
Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough.
I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin:
“Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.”


“The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.”
Remember how the 

LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.  
I DID SOME MATH.  
IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.)
Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.”
THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY.
And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria.
Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine.
Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE.
IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST.
And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death.
Don’t touch the pretty shells.


I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have.


You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌

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