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College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” What do you have to do to get a scholarship? I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. this whole post I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL
College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your
 child to obey Jesus, the
 devil will teach them
 evolution, sexuality
 psychology, witchcraft
thefingerfuckingfemalefury:
fire-ghoul:

seekerofshores:

grumpyrpgreviews:

prokopetz:

cheesedeity:

prokopetz:

bear-eggs:

geekandmisandry:

Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time.
#TeamSatan

Can satan come teach a class at my school

Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers.
For example, this guy?
Teaches moral philosophy.
And this creepy dude?
He’s your astronomy professor.
Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild.

I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school.

“Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.”
“Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.”
“Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.”

What do you have to do to get a scholarship?

I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. 

this whole post

I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL

thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisand...

Brains, Fucking, and Guns: change.org Trending petition Matt There's a new petition taking off on Change.org, and we think you might be interested in signing it. meatswitch: snakegay: indianworiorprincess: snakegay: jorycancrochet: gorps: blipblerp: hungwy: lgbltsandwitch: ssj14goku: dildomuncher3000: ssj14goku: domozillla: ssj14goku: thetwinkerbell: ssj14goku: Change.org - Petition To Hire 1,000,000 People To Put Their Fingers In The Shoot Hole Of Peoples’ Guns So They Can’t Shoot Them It’s still gonna shoot… And they’re gonna lose a finger No. The finger blocks the bullet. We can do this This is a gun we’re talking about. The projectile is fired using an explosion, not by compressed air of a toy gun or the elastic forces of a sling shot. People would be lucky if they only lost their finger. The finger blocks it The finger won’t block it - the shaft is only there for keeping the bullet straight, all the propulsion happens behind the bullet. The bullet would rip through the finger, not that many would actually fit without the victim being a child, and beyond. The bullet would go forward a little and then hit the finger and stop it’s not that hard to understand People are going to lose their hands. Go watch Mythbusters. They did an episode on this, the hand fucking exploded. No, the bullet would start to go but stop at the finger. Thats basic physics. Also hands dont explode normally they did something wrong. Why the dingleknockers would you even consider sticking your finger in the barrel of a loaded gun?? the amount of force propelling the bullet at that close of range would shatter the finger at the very least; this is a petition for 1,000,000 people to loose the use of their hands. If a bullet explodes the back of a persons skull when they shoot it in their mouth it sure as hell will explode a finger. No the finger would stop it I’m loving the idiocy of this post. Ppl with brains: ummm finger go boom… Others: no bullet stop. U no kno fisics :V no the finger would stop it You guy who think the bullet would stop at the finger have never shot a gun and can volunteer to it their fingers in the barrel of my 9 mil and I’ll I’ll the trigger and see if it will stop the bullet. Dumdasses the finger would stop it
Brains, Fucking, and Guns: change.org Trending petition
 Matt There's a new petition taking off on Change.org, and we
 think you might be interested in signing it.
meatswitch:
snakegay:


indianworiorprincess:

snakegay:


jorycancrochet:

gorps:

blipblerp:


hungwy:

lgbltsandwitch:


ssj14goku:

dildomuncher3000:

ssj14goku:

domozillla:

ssj14goku:

thetwinkerbell:

ssj14goku:

Change.org - Petition To Hire 1,000,000 People To Put Their Fingers In The Shoot Hole Of Peoples’ Guns So They Can’t Shoot Them

It’s still gonna shoot… And they’re gonna lose a finger

No. The finger blocks the bullet. We can do this

This is a gun we’re talking about. The projectile is fired using an explosion, not by compressed air of a toy gun or the elastic forces of a sling shot. People would be lucky if they only lost their finger.

The finger blocks it

The finger won’t block it - the shaft is only there for keeping the bullet straight, all the propulsion happens behind the bullet. The bullet would rip through the finger, not that many would actually fit without the victim being a child, and beyond.

The bullet would go forward a little and then hit the finger and stop it’s not that hard to understand


People are going to lose their hands. Go watch Mythbusters. They did an episode on this, the hand fucking exploded.



No, the bullet would start to go but stop at the finger. Thats basic physics. Also hands dont explode normally they did something wrong.


Why the dingleknockers would you even consider sticking your finger in the barrel of a loaded gun?? the amount of force propelling the bullet at that close of range would shatter the finger at the very least; this is a petition for 1,000,000 people to loose the use of their hands. If a bullet explodes the back of a persons skull when they shoot it in their mouth it sure as hell will explode a finger.


No the finger would stop it


I’m loving the idiocy of this post.
Ppl with brains: ummm finger go boom…
Others: no bullet stop. U no kno fisics :V

no the finger would stop it


You guy who think the bullet would stop at the finger have never shot a gun and can volunteer  to it their fingers in the barrel of my 9 mil and I’ll I’ll the trigger and see if it will stop the bullet.  Dumdasses

the finger would stop it

meatswitch: snakegay: indianworiorprincess: snakegay: jorycancrochet: gorps: blipblerp: hungwy: lgbltsandwitch: ssj14goku: dild...

Apparently, Bad, and Bruh: Roberk Vanse Mark Humph oma Progra Robert We Michae Marjut Mier Mark e with Diploma Program magical-game: mementoviviere: coffeehedonist: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: rebecca-lotto-mage-of-breath: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: So I found this caterpillar on my way to class We’re bros I named him chicken nugget Aaaa he’s turning a duller color… I hope he’s alright So apparently chicken nugget is a spicebush swallowtail and they turn yellow before they pupate. He was making little silk things everywhere Bruh this caterpie is going to evolve to metapod today my boy isn’t messing around update hes entirely yellow now i made him a tube room hes crawlin all over the place checking it out its happening False alarm he moved a bitThis guy ??? caterpie doesnt evolve into kakuna whats he doing its happening part 2 For Real This Time chicken nugget using those advanced tactics balancing my man doesnt do anything halfway i put on some tunez for him so he can get into the metamorphazone sorry for keeping you all in suspense but chicken nugget is doing fine and he has a cool hat now hes been chillin like this for a couple days  hes been in cocoon for 10 days now🎉🐛🎉 let me know how he’s doing soon HES BUSTIN OUT im going to sleep, chicken nugget is snoozin and ill check up on him as soon as i wake up hope he doesnt party too hard  🐛 💤 💤 hes gone goth hes in his emoteen stage CHICKEN NUGGET IS A CHICKEN WING NOW BABY WE HAVE LIFTOFF!!!!! hes’s in a bigger container than the one in the pic now but im gonna let my home boy find his way in the world after he gets used to his wings a little bit this kid doesnt have a bad angle dang https://youtu.be/TwpFUQzvRp0 there he goes he’s free and im so proud and a little sad this was an incredible experience (thats my family oohing and ahhing in the background) I’ve seen yall reblog the unfinished ones SO MUCH that I’m getting pissed, anyway here’s the full chicken nugget saga. Awesome! Hope you’re happy somewhere, Chicken Nugget! I have missed this post so much! Let’s all celebrate Chicken Nugget!
Apparently, Bad, and Bruh: Roberk Vanse
 Mark Humph
 oma Progra

 Robert We
 Michae
 Marjut Mier
 Mark
 e with
 Diploma Program
magical-game:
mementoviviere:

coffeehedonist:


oddity-txt:


oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

rebecca-lotto-mage-of-breath:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

oddity-txt:

So I found this caterpillar on my way to class 

We’re bros

I named him chicken nugget

Aaaa he’s turning a duller color… I hope he’s alright

So apparently chicken nugget is a spicebush swallowtail and they turn yellow before they pupate.
He was making little silk things everywhere 
Bruh this caterpie is going to evolve to metapod today my boy isn’t messing around


update hes entirely yellow now


i made him a tube room
hes crawlin all over the place checking it out


its happening

False alarm he moved a bitThis guy


??? caterpie doesnt evolve into kakuna


whats he doing


its happening part 2 For Real This Time


chicken nugget using those advanced tactics balancing my man doesnt do anything halfway


i put on some tunez for him so he can get into the metamorphazone

sorry for keeping you all in suspense but chicken nugget is doing fine and he has a cool hat now
hes been chillin like this for a couple days 

hes been in cocoon for 10 days now🎉🐛🎉

let me know how he’s doing soon


HES BUSTIN OUT


im going to sleep, chicken nugget is snoozin and ill check up on him as soon as i wake up
hope he doesnt party too hard 


🐛


💤 

💤 







hes gone goth hes in his emoteen stage


CHICKEN NUGGET IS A CHICKEN WING NOW BABY WE HAVE LIFTOFF!!!!!


hes’s in a bigger container than the one in the pic now but im gonna let my home boy find his way in the world after he gets used to his wings a little bit


this kid doesnt have a bad angle dang


https://youtu.be/TwpFUQzvRp0
there he goes he’s free and im so proud and a little sad
this was an incredible experience
(thats my family oohing and ahhing in the background)


I’ve seen yall reblog the unfinished ones SO MUCH that I’m getting pissed, anyway here’s the full chicken nugget saga.


Awesome! Hope you’re happy somewhere, Chicken Nugget!

I have missed this post so much! Let’s all celebrate Chicken Nugget!

magical-game: mementoviviere: coffeehedonist: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: oddity-txt: ...

Apparently, Bitch, and Dude: Hacker Scripts Based on a true story. xoox: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... I fsomething- anything requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxoc: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy xxx: You're gonna love this ooc: smack-my-bitch-up.sh -sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login xxox: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help" trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time" xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am xoox: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee. sh this one waits exatly 17 seconds(), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew.Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 () seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xoxx: holy sh"t I'm keeping those I found this on an old Git account
Apparently, Bitch, and Dude: Hacker Scripts
 Based on a true story.
 xoox: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know
 that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... I fsomething- anything
 requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.
 xxoc: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy
 xxx: You're gonna love this
 ooc: smack-my-bitch-up.sh -sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons
 from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server
 after 9pm with his login
 xxox: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help"
 trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database
 to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time"
 xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna
 work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive
 sessions on the server at 8:45am
 xoox: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee. sh this one waits exatly 17 seconds(), then opens a telnet session to
 our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and
 running) and sends something like sys brew.Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits
 another 24 () seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from
 the dudes desk.
 xoxx: holy sh"t I'm keeping those
I found this on an old Git account

I found this on an old Git account