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milking: Milking the girl/boy meme before it dies
milking: Milking the girl/boy meme before it dies

Milking the girl/boy meme before it dies

milking: NFL milking sweet victory for money (2019 colorized)
milking: NFL milking sweet victory for money (2019 colorized)

NFL milking sweet victory for money (2019 colorized)

milking: Motherhood denied Breaking the mother-calf bond is fundamental to all forms of dairy farming. <p><a href="http://the-mighty-birdy.tumblr.com/post/165694169733/i-am-your-northern-star-dear-tumb1r" class="tumblr_blog">the-mighty-birdy</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://i-am-your-northern-star.tumblr.com/post/165693494927/dear-tumb1r-krakenpocalypse-crimsonclad" class="tumblr_blog">i-am-your-northern-star</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://dear-tumb1r.tumblr.com/post/165688769552/krakenpocalypse-crimsonclad-kedreeva" class="tumblr_blog">dear-tumb1r</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://krakenpocalypse.tumblr.com/post/165684582701/crimsonclad-kedreeva-palpablenotion" class="tumblr_blog">krakenpocalypse</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://crimsonclad.tumblr.com/post/165654725553/kedreeva-palpablenotion" class="tumblr_blog">crimsonclad</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kedreeva.tumblr.com/post/165653905615/palpablenotion-speedforcesensitive" class="tumblr_blog">kedreeva</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://palpablenotion.tumblr.com/post/165166115235/speedforcesensitive-satanstruemistress" class="tumblr_blog">palpablenotion</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://speedforcesensitive.tumblr.com/post/165165767368/satanstruemistress-vinato71-dustypumpkin" class="tumblr_blog">speedforcesensitive</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://satanstruemistress.tumblr.com/post/165022766332/vinato71-dustypumpkin-rossmallo" class="tumblr_blog">satanstruemistress</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://vinato71.tumblr.com/post/161293956968/dustypumpkin-rossmallo-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">vinato71</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://dustypumpkin.tumblr.com/post/160300743192/rossmallo-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">dustypumpkin</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://rossmallo.tumblr.com/post/160299092775/thehornedwitch-thesocialjusticecourier" class="tumblr_blog">rossmallo</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://thehornedwitch.tumblr.com/post/160275346862/thesocialjusticecourier-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">thehornedwitch</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://thesocialjusticecourier.tumblr.com/post/160263273220/thehornedwitch-somejane-namesnotfred" class="tumblr_blog">thesocialjusticecourier</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://thehornedwitch.tumblr.com/post/159933662002/somejane-namesnotfred-gimmeacoldbeer" class="tumblr_blog">thehornedwitch</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://somejane.tumblr.com/post/109645584967">somejane</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://namesnotfred.tumblr.com/post/109005051111">namesnotfred</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gimmeacoldbeer.tumblr.com/post/72414064607">gimmeacoldbeer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://kijikun.tumblr.com/post/72255066968">kijikun</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://striderwolf.tumblr.com/post/71894869320">striderwolf</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://crazyqueerclassicist.tumblr.com/post/71587090064">crazyqueerclassicist</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://north-american-weesnaw.tumblr.com/post/71571039829">north-american-weesnaw</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://friso1990.tumblr.com/post/71570538840">friso1990</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://catsteaks.tumblr.com/post/71409852369">catsteaks</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gorreality.tumblr.com/post/70881833496">gorreality</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>鈥淚 can鈥檛 be vegan, I love cheese鈥</p> <p>Dairy industry is as evil as meat.聽No less harm for animals.聽Does it look natural that calf can鈥檛 drink milk so you can taste your piece of cheese?聽</p> <p>GO VEGAN.聽</p> </blockquote> <p><i><b>WRONG</b></i></p> <p>That calf is wearing a nose tag. Nose tags are put on calves so that they are able to stay with their mothers longer, but are unable to nurse. They don鈥檛 NEED to nurse as they get older, they just get greedier and pushier and will bash up the cow鈥檚 udder and bruise it with their noses.</p> <p>This nose-tag is so that calves can stay with their mothers, their mothers can remain pain-free and healthy, and nobody is stressed.</p> <p>Educate yourselves you ignorant fucking tarts.</p> </blockquote> <p>鈥eally? You don鈥檛 think it might have anything to do with the milk being stolen for human consumption? At all? Not even a tiny bit?</p> </blockquote> <p>Militant vegans can fuck right off</p> </blockquote> <p>Based on fur texture and face shape, that calf is at least six months old, probably older.聽 Calves can survive without actual cow milk even at three months, though older is better (calves weaned that early are usually fed a sort of formula for another couple months).</p> <p>Also, nose tags like that one don鈥檛 go through the cow鈥檚 septum.聽 They basically work like those fake septum rings for humans.</p> <p>In addition to weaning the calves, another use for nose tags is protecting non-lactating cows.聽 Sometimes weanlings or even adult cows will suck on themselves or other non-lactating cows; this can cause internal teat scarring bad enough to prevent that teat or teats from ever working.聽 I鈥檝e seen this happen, and it鈥檚 ugly, probably at least somewhat painful, and, if bad enough, would lead to the cow being slaughtered at a very young age because she can鈥檛 produce milk, has chronic mastitis, and/or can鈥檛 be milked with automatic milking equipment.聽 So,<b> nose tags actually prevent animal cruelty</b>.</p> <p>Also, calves will suck on anything remotely oblong (and attempt to eat literally anything), even if they are being adequately fed or overfed.聽 Often they will suck on other calves鈥 ears, and, since ears are longer than teats and cows have upper as well as lower teeth in the back of their mouths, many calves get bites on their ears, which often become severely infected.聽 I鈥檓 not sure if nose tags would work there, because physics鈥攁 non-toxic but bad-tasting ear paint would be better鈥攂ut yeah, letting a calf put anything it wants in its mouth is not always a good idea.</p> </blockquote> <p>reblogging for educational purposes.</p> </blockquote> <p>reblogging for people being schooled</p> </blockquote> <p>This was the funniest argument about false cruelty I have read.. Thank you.聽</p> </blockquote> <p>I love this for 2 reasons: Most people don鈥檛 realize that in farming areas agriculture/horticulture/animal husbandry is part of public school education from as early on as 7th grade. (Though I remember dissecting cow eyes in 4th grade science sooo) I assure you fifteen year old farm kids know more about what constitutes animal cruelty in farms than thirty year old vegans with, or without an agenda.聽</p> <p>Also that if you really want good quality beef/pork/eggs/milk/etc you don鈥檛 abuse your animals. Ever. That鈥檚 not the point and if you want to make any kind of money off your career choice, you are going to treat those creatures better than you treat yourself. You鈥檒l call a vet five times for an infection in your herd before you visit the hospital for a missing foot on your own leg.聽</p> <p>So. Yeah. Watch out, because we鈥檙e getting internet access these days. We鈥檙e on tumblr too.聽</p> </blockquote> <p><figure class="" data-orig-height="160" data-orig-width="300" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_nj0zcyv0go1r1k5tf.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_owsrk62QTZ1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="160" data-orig-width="300" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_nj0zcyv0go1r1k5tf.gif"/></figure></p> <p>P.S. The immigrant workers farming your supermarket produce have no health care or legal protection, and the Bolivians farming your 365 Organic Quinoa can鈥檛 afford to eat it. But PLEASE won鈥檛 someone think of the poor baby cows who won鈥檛 get off the tit?!</p> </blockquote> <p>Also this is a LOT nicer than what mother cows do to calves that won鈥檛 be weaned. You know what mother cows do to calves that won鈥檛 wean? kick them in the head. Now I don鈥檛 know about vegans, but I鈥檇 rather have a nose tag that discouraged me from injuring my mother (because calves that don鈥檛 wean tend to chew on udders and make mother cows bleed) rather than being kicked in the head.<br/>Source: I grew up on a fucking cattle ranch. I have seen chickens skeletonize a mouse I KNOW SHIT.</p> </blockquote> <h2>鈥淚 have seen chickens skeletonize a mouse I KNOW SHIT.鈥</h2> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="230" data-tumblr-attribution="vegemaryam-blog-blog:dHMFQoiSWHRFiB-ADut1Hg:Z5ZE3yG4v53k" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lz2rnxs2001qewskmo1_250.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/058afa51d891f3ae78ad77a706d4294e/tumblr_inline_owsrk7X9bI1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="230" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lz2rnxs2001qewskmo1_250.gif"/></figure><p>I鈥檓 sorry, what? What??? WHAT??? you can鈥檛 just leave it there please explain <a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mE-H1ppiBm7u2G5sYjEGAxg">@thehornedwitch</a><br/></p> </blockquote> <p>Happy to explain!<br/>See, chickens are omnivorous. They eat bugs, plants, and meatstuffs. Y'know how crows and ravens and things eat meat? Well, chickens too. Ours had a particular fondness for ham when someone accidentally put it into the bucket of good scraps we set aside for the chickens. A bucket we tried to keep as meat-free as possible, because few things are more terrifying than a chicken looking you in the eyes as it scarfs down ham.<br/>Anyway, back to the mouse.<br/>One day i was doing Chicken Chores, like gathering eggs, putting out grain, emptying the bucket of greens, etc, when a mouse runs across the pen.<br/>All at once, eight or so chickens stop dead, look at it, and SWARM.<br/>Now I鈥檓 six at this point in time and developing a healthy fear of chickens, and so do nothing.<br/>By the time the chickens are done, all that is left of the mouse is its bones. I left the chicken pen very, very quickly.<br/>Chickens crave meat. They were dinosaurs. They did not forget that they were dinosaurs.<br/>They will also cannibalize each other with reckless abandon. Sometimes we just had to remove one chicken to its own private pen away from the others because no matter what we did, that specific one always tried to eat the other chickens. We had one that really liked other chicken鈥檚 eyes. Bear in mind, our pens ensured each chicken had about five to six square feet all its own if you managed to space every chicken out evenly, we never locked them in teensy pen things, and fed them LOTS. These chickens just really, really wanted to maim.<br/>Chickens that are not Buff Orpingtons are the devil. Buff Orpingtons are sweethearts. If you must have chickens, have that kind. And never get Guineas. Guineas are SATAN INCARNATE. THEY SMELL FEAR.</p> </blockquote> <p>Holy shit, I dont think I鈥檒l ever use chicken as an insult again.聽</p> </blockquote> <p>Holy Shit, same here that is terrifying</p> </blockquote> <p>Will I鈥檓 using it as a compliment</p> </blockquote> <p>I love farm animals.</p> </blockquote> <p>鈥淐hickens crave meat. They were dinosaurs. They did not forget that they were dinosaurs.鈥<br/></p> <p>If you鈥檝e ever looked a chicken in the eye you know that they don鈥檛 just remember; they鈥檙e patiently awaiting the day they become dinosaurs again.聽</p> </blockquote> <p><a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mbqnkKs3SqeMl1_0xhazmyQ">@kedreeva</a></p> </blockquote> <p>I have reblogged this before because watching farmers school vegans is always hilarious, but now we鈥檙e into birds, specifically fowl, and I have got <i>stories</i>.</p> <p> I had to give my turkey an antibiotic injection once upon a time, and she turned the needle puncture into a six inch by three inch hole in her back overnight as she attempted to <i>eat herself</i> because apparently turkeys find themselves to be delicious. She had to spend 3 months duct taped into a tea towel (the bandages underneath cleaned and replaced daily, mind you) until it healed because she would not stop ripping the bandages off to continue consuming herself. <br/></p> <p>Your chickens strip a mouse to the bone? Mine draw and quarter them and run around with the parts shrieking. My peacocks grab mice, beat them to death on the ground with this insanely fast back and forth head twisting motion, and then swallow them whole. You would not think an entire adult mouse would fit in their face, and you would be wrong.</p> <p>I knew a guy that used to regularly post photos of the 5-6鈥 long Copperhead snakes his peafowl would destroy. And I don鈥檛 mean kill, I mean <i>destroy</i>. These venomous snakes would get into the pens and the peas would just peck them into oblivion like nbd.</p> <p>Fowl didn鈥檛 just used to be dinosaurs. <i>They are still dinosaurs</i>.</p> <p>Thankfully they are small dinosaurs</p> <p>and we can just tape them into tea towels if we have to</p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="446" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/352a8867c23dad97f44a9011fac8fbb1/tumblr_nb6qmiuoCV1rc4grco1_500.jpg"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/acee3cfaed48d9fef00fcee900d458d3/tumblr_inline_owsrk7C8Bg1rw09tq_540.jpg" data-orig-height="446" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/352a8867c23dad97f44a9011fac8fbb1/tumblr_nb6qmiuoCV1rc4grco1_500.jpg"/></figure></blockquote> <p>BEGGING for a Jurassic Park reboot where farmers run the place instead of brogrammer scientists, and the raptors frequently get scolded and taped into tea towels</p> </blockquote> <p>Now I feel less guilty about eating chicken. It鈥檚 just pre-emptive self defense.</p> </blockquote> <p>Its also preemptive self defense to eat pigs because they will knock you over and eat you alive </p> </blockquote> <p>I had a friend in New Zealand who has some chickens (and one turkey named Pablo) on her land. One day she looked out her window to discover that Pablo had killed one of the hens, and kept returning to mutilate the body. There were chicken parts everywhere. He would drag what was left of the hen around the yard like he was proud of his work. They ended up getting rid of Pablo. </p> </blockquote> <p>WHAT THE FUCK I THOUGHT CHICKENS WERE SWEET LITTLE FLUFFS WHAT IS THIS SHIT</p> </blockquote> <p>Oh no, Birdy. Chickens are kind of evil. My dad still has a scar on his hand from being pecked by a chicken when he was six.</p>
milking: Motherhood denied
 Breaking the mother-calf bond is fundamental to
 all forms of dairy farming.
<p><a href="http://the-mighty-birdy.tumblr.com/post/165694169733/i-am-your-northern-star-dear-tumb1r" class="tumblr_blog">the-mighty-birdy</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="https://i-am-your-northern-star.tumblr.com/post/165693494927/dear-tumb1r-krakenpocalypse-crimsonclad" class="tumblr_blog">i-am-your-northern-star</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://dear-tumb1r.tumblr.com/post/165688769552/krakenpocalypse-crimsonclad-kedreeva" class="tumblr_blog">dear-tumb1r</a>:</p>

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<p><a href="http://krakenpocalypse.tumblr.com/post/165684582701/crimsonclad-kedreeva-palpablenotion" class="tumblr_blog">krakenpocalypse</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://crimsonclad.tumblr.com/post/165654725553/kedreeva-palpablenotion" class="tumblr_blog">crimsonclad</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://kedreeva.tumblr.com/post/165653905615/palpablenotion-speedforcesensitive" class="tumblr_blog">kedreeva</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="https://palpablenotion.tumblr.com/post/165166115235/speedforcesensitive-satanstruemistress" class="tumblr_blog">palpablenotion</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://speedforcesensitive.tumblr.com/post/165165767368/satanstruemistress-vinato71-dustypumpkin" class="tumblr_blog">speedforcesensitive</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://satanstruemistress.tumblr.com/post/165022766332/vinato71-dustypumpkin-rossmallo" class="tumblr_blog">satanstruemistress</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="https://vinato71.tumblr.com/post/161293956968/dustypumpkin-rossmallo-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">vinato71</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://dustypumpkin.tumblr.com/post/160300743192/rossmallo-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">dustypumpkin</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="https://rossmallo.tumblr.com/post/160299092775/thehornedwitch-thesocialjusticecourier" class="tumblr_blog">rossmallo</a>:</p>

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<p><a href="http://thehornedwitch.tumblr.com/post/160275346862/thesocialjusticecourier-thehornedwitch" class="tumblr_blog">thehornedwitch</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://thesocialjusticecourier.tumblr.com/post/160263273220/thehornedwitch-somejane-namesnotfred" class="tumblr_blog">thesocialjusticecourier</a>:</p>
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<p><a href="http://thehornedwitch.tumblr.com/post/159933662002/somejane-namesnotfred-gimmeacoldbeer" class="tumblr_blog">thehornedwitch</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://somejane.tumblr.com/post/109645584967">somejane</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://namesnotfred.tumblr.com/post/109005051111">namesnotfred</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gimmeacoldbeer.tumblr.com/post/72414064607">gimmeacoldbeer</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://kijikun.tumblr.com/post/72255066968">kijikun</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://striderwolf.tumblr.com/post/71894869320">striderwolf</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://crazyqueerclassicist.tumblr.com/post/71587090064">crazyqueerclassicist</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://north-american-weesnaw.tumblr.com/post/71571039829">north-american-weesnaw</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://friso1990.tumblr.com/post/71570538840">friso1990</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://catsteaks.tumblr.com/post/71409852369">catsteaks</a>:</p>
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<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gorreality.tumblr.com/post/70881833496">gorreality</a>:</p>
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<p>鈥淚 can鈥檛 be vegan, I love cheese鈥</p>
<p>Dairy industry is as evil as meat.聽No less harm for animals.聽Does it look natural that calf can鈥檛 drink milk so you can taste your piece of cheese?聽</p>
<p>GO VEGAN.聽</p>
</blockquote>
<p><i><b>WRONG</b></i></p>
<p>That calf is wearing a nose tag. Nose tags are put on calves so that they are able to stay with their mothers longer, but are unable to nurse. They don鈥檛 NEED to nurse as they get older, they just get greedier and pushier and will bash up the cow鈥檚 udder and bruise it with their noses.</p>
<p>This nose-tag is so that calves can stay with their mothers, their mothers can remain pain-free and healthy, and nobody is stressed.</p>
<p>Educate yourselves you ignorant fucking tarts.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>鈥eally? You don鈥檛 think it might have anything to do with the milk being stolen for human consumption? At all? Not even a tiny bit?</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Militant vegans can fuck right off</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Based on fur texture and face shape, that calf is at least six months old, probably older.聽 Calves can survive without actual cow milk even at three months, though older is better (calves weaned that early are usually fed a sort of formula for another couple months).</p>
<p>Also, nose tags like that one don鈥檛 go through the cow鈥檚 septum.聽 They basically work like those fake septum rings for humans.</p>
<p>In addition to weaning the calves, another use for nose tags is protecting non-lactating cows.聽 Sometimes weanlings or even adult cows will suck on themselves or other non-lactating cows; this can cause internal teat scarring bad enough to prevent that teat or teats from ever working.聽 I鈥檝e seen this happen, and it鈥檚 ugly, probably at least somewhat painful, and, if bad enough, would lead to the cow being slaughtered at a very young age because she can鈥檛 produce milk, has chronic mastitis, and/or can鈥檛 be milked with automatic milking equipment.聽 So,<b> nose tags actually prevent animal cruelty</b>.</p>
<p>Also, calves will suck on anything remotely oblong (and attempt to eat literally anything), even if they are being adequately fed or overfed.聽 Often they will suck on other calves鈥 ears, and, since ears are longer than teats and cows have upper as well as lower teeth in the back of their mouths, many calves get bites on their ears, which often become severely infected.聽 I鈥檓 not sure if nose tags would work there, because physics鈥攁 non-toxic but bad-tasting ear paint would be better鈥攂ut yeah, letting a calf put anything it wants in its mouth is not always a good idea.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>reblogging for educational purposes.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>reblogging for people being schooled</p>
</blockquote>
<p>This was the funniest argument about false cruelty I have read.. Thank you.聽</p>
</blockquote>
<p>I love this for 2 reasons: Most people don鈥檛 realize that in farming areas agriculture/horticulture/animal husbandry is part of public school education from as early on as 7th grade. (Though I remember dissecting cow eyes in 4th grade science sooo) I assure you fifteen year old farm kids know more about what constitutes animal cruelty in farms than thirty year old vegans with, or without an agenda.聽</p>
<p>Also that if you really want good quality beef/pork/eggs/milk/etc you don鈥檛 abuse your animals. Ever. That鈥檚 not the point and if you want to make any kind of money off your career choice, you are going to treat those creatures better than you treat yourself. You鈥檒l call a vet five times for an infection in your herd before you visit the hospital for a missing foot on your own leg.聽</p>
<p>So. Yeah. Watch out, because we鈥檙e getting internet access these days. We鈥檙e on tumblr too.聽</p>
</blockquote>
<p><figure class="" data-orig-height="160" data-orig-width="300" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_nj0zcyv0go1r1k5tf.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_owsrk62QTZ1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="160" data-orig-width="300" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ce70686fa4ad69e81e9c6bcd29fa12ff/tumblr_inline_nj0zcyv0go1r1k5tf.gif"/></figure></p>
<p>P.S. The immigrant workers farming your supermarket produce have no health care or legal protection, and the Bolivians farming your 365 Organic Quinoa can鈥檛 afford to eat it. But PLEASE won鈥檛 someone think of the poor baby cows who won鈥檛 get off the tit?!</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Also this is a LOT nicer than what mother cows do to calves that won鈥檛 be weaned. You know what mother cows do to calves that won鈥檛 wean? kick them in the head. Now I don鈥檛 know about vegans, but I鈥檇 rather have a nose tag that discouraged me from injuring my mother (because calves that don鈥檛 wean tend to chew on udders and make mother cows bleed) rather than being kicked in the head.<br/>Source: I grew up on a fucking cattle ranch. I have seen chickens skeletonize a mouse I KNOW SHIT.</p>
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<h2>鈥淚 have seen chickens skeletonize a mouse I KNOW SHIT.鈥</h2>
<figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="230" data-tumblr-attribution="vegemaryam-blog-blog:dHMFQoiSWHRFiB-ADut1Hg:Z5ZE3yG4v53k" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lz2rnxs2001qewskmo1_250.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/058afa51d891f3ae78ad77a706d4294e/tumblr_inline_owsrk7X9bI1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="230" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lz2rnxs2001qewskmo1_250.gif"/></figure><p>I鈥檓 sorry, what? What??? WHAT??? you can鈥檛 just leave it there please explain <a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mE-H1ppiBm7u2G5sYjEGAxg">@thehornedwitch</a><br/></p>
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<p>Happy to explain!<br/>See, chickens are omnivorous. They eat bugs, plants, and meatstuffs. Y'know how crows and ravens and things eat meat? Well, chickens too. Ours had a particular fondness for ham when someone accidentally put it into the bucket of good scraps we set aside for the chickens. A bucket we tried to keep as meat-free as possible, because few things are more terrifying than a chicken looking you in the eyes as it scarfs down ham.<br/>Anyway, back to the mouse.<br/>One day i was doing Chicken Chores, like gathering eggs, putting out grain, emptying the bucket of greens, etc, when a mouse runs across the pen.<br/>All at once, eight or so chickens stop dead, look at it, and SWARM.<br/>Now I鈥檓 six at this point in time and developing a healthy fear of chickens, and so do nothing.<br/>By the time the chickens are done, all that is left of the mouse is its bones. I left the chicken pen very, very quickly.<br/>Chickens crave meat. They were dinosaurs. They did not forget that they were dinosaurs.<br/>They will also cannibalize each other with reckless abandon. Sometimes we just had to remove one chicken to its own private pen away from the others because no matter what we did, that specific one always tried to eat the other chickens. We had one that really liked other chicken鈥檚 eyes. Bear in mind, our pens ensured each chicken had about five to six square feet all its own if you managed to space every chicken out evenly, we never locked them in teensy pen things, and fed them LOTS. These chickens just really, really wanted to maim.<br/>Chickens that are not Buff Orpingtons are the devil. Buff Orpingtons are sweethearts. If you must have chickens, have that kind. And never get Guineas. Guineas are SATAN INCARNATE. THEY SMELL FEAR.</p>
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<p>Holy shit, I dont think I鈥檒l ever use chicken as an insult again.聽</p>
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<p>Holy Shit, same here that is terrifying</p>
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<p>Will I鈥檓 using it as a compliment</p>
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<p>I love farm animals.</p>
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<p>鈥淐hickens crave meat. They were dinosaurs. They did not forget that they were dinosaurs.鈥<br/></p>
<p>If you鈥檝e ever looked a chicken in the eye you know that they don鈥檛 just remember; they鈥檙e patiently awaiting the day they become dinosaurs again.聽</p>
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<p><a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mbqnkKs3SqeMl1_0xhazmyQ">@kedreeva</a></p>
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<p>I have reblogged this before because watching farmers school vegans is always hilarious, but now we鈥檙e into birds, specifically fowl, and I have got <i>stories</i>.</p>
<p>

I had to give my turkey an antibiotic injection once upon a time, and she turned the needle puncture into a six inch by three inch hole in her back overnight as she attempted to <i>eat herself</i> because apparently turkeys find themselves to be delicious. She had to spend 3 months duct taped into a tea towel (the bandages underneath cleaned and replaced daily, mind you) until it healed because she would not stop ripping the bandages off to continue consuming herself.

<br/></p>
<p>Your chickens strip a mouse to the bone? Mine draw and quarter them and run around with the parts shrieking. My peacocks grab mice, beat them to death on the ground with this insanely fast back and forth head twisting motion, and then swallow them whole. You would not think an entire adult mouse would fit in their face, and you would be wrong.</p>
<p>I knew a guy that used to regularly post photos of the 5-6鈥 long Copperhead snakes his peafowl would destroy. And I don鈥檛 mean kill, I mean <i>destroy</i>. These venomous snakes would get into the pens and the peas would just peck them into oblivion like nbd.</p>
<p>Fowl didn鈥檛 just used to be dinosaurs. <i>They are still dinosaurs</i>.</p>
<p>Thankfully they are small dinosaurs</p>
<p>and we can just tape them into tea towels if we have to</p>
<figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="446" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/352a8867c23dad97f44a9011fac8fbb1/tumblr_nb6qmiuoCV1rc4grco1_500.jpg"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/acee3cfaed48d9fef00fcee900d458d3/tumblr_inline_owsrk7C8Bg1rw09tq_540.jpg" data-orig-height="446" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/352a8867c23dad97f44a9011fac8fbb1/tumblr_nb6qmiuoCV1rc4grco1_500.jpg"/></figure></blockquote>
<p>BEGGING for a Jurassic Park reboot where farmers run the place instead of brogrammer scientists, and the raptors frequently get scolded and taped into tea towels</p>
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<p>Now I feel less guilty about eating chicken. It鈥檚 just pre-emptive self defense.</p>
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<p>Its also preemptive self defense to eat pigs because they will knock you over and eat you alive </p>
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<p>I had a friend in New Zealand who has some chickens (and one turkey named Pablo) on her land. One day she looked out her window to discover that Pablo had killed one of the hens, and kept returning to mutilate the body. There were chicken parts everywhere. He would drag what was left of the hen around the yard like he was proud of his work. They ended up getting rid of Pablo. </p>
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<p>WHAT THE FUCK I THOUGHT CHICKENS WERE SWEET LITTLE FLUFFS WHAT IS THIS SHIT</p>
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<p>Oh no, Birdy. Chickens are kind of evil. My dad still has a scar on his hand from being pecked by a chicken when he was six.</p>

<p><a href="http://the-mighty-birdy.tumblr.com/post/165694169733/i-am-your-northern-star-dear-tumb1r" class="tumblr_blog">the-mighty-bird...

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