Mornings


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    

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    Ass, Bad, and Crime: wait, you're jewish?
 i wanna die so bad right now
 -waaaaay too tall
 -blood is 3% soda
 -literally murders innocents and is still
 widely considered a "smol bean"
 -good relationship with their mom
 -hobbies range from making origami to
 plotting to blow up the moon
 -really their height is just unreasonable
 and very intimidating
 i heard you've been saying some shit
 grandparents live in korea
 -little ball of anger
 -uses napalm as moisturiser
 -no one is sure if they're actually
 racist or not
 thinks they can speak german
 -lists "kicking inanimate objects"
 as a hobby
 got sold fake cocaine once
 about me on your blog
 -damaged
 -iterally no one can bring themselves to like
 -communicates only in grunts
 -writes terrible fiction
 -goes out of their way to upset others
 -trying desperately to hide the gay (failing)
 -says shit like "adios" (doesn't speak spanish
 -leaves agressive voicemails
 -used to be emo
 -gets drunk and stabs inanimate objects
 -has an alien girlfriends and also 700 alter egos
 -is 103% sure that the world is out to get them
 way too many Ns
 little miss finland
 turns to camera in shock ADAM
 supreme gentleman
 -absolutely deplorable
 shoves an american flag up their ass
 most mornings
 takes selfies everywhere
 -everywhere i said
 loves their pets
 -finds depressive thinking arousing
 horrible handwriting
 tries. fails.
 -wants to be Wait, You're Jewish? but can't does rude shit but no one can stay
 -uses air quotes to patronise others
 -"feminism is stupid"
 -can't get laid
 -has probably had lip injections. and ego
 injections.
 "why do girls always go for douchebags"
 -wears sunglasses indoors. at night. in
 december. after the last star in the galaxy
 has burned out.
 mad at them
 -all gods are fictional except for themselfays gets asked for I.D.
 -makes fun of soccer moms but doesn't act hasn't taken a flattering photo in 7
 -says weird shit 97% of the time
 -wears t-shirts with edgy slogans
 -has v few friends but the friendships they clasifies self as a "cool kid"
 will not get a haircut
 hasn't slept ever
 do have a frighteningly intense
 56
 brennan's burger bundies
 gets what they want because they are-worships satan
 -known as the zodiac killer
 -takes off their glasses and becomes
 ets
 morbid sense of humour that
 occasionally gets them in trouble
 wants to have you (over) for dinner
 behaves drunk while sober and also
 while drunk.
 -vastly overestimates their ability to get
 away with things
 -does absolutely nothing in a group
 project and no one gets mad
 -dog person
 -has brushed their teeth less than 7
 times since birth
 probably borrowed their cheekbones
 off a meth addict
 -greasy grease on top of their grease
jeffreysdrunk:

luvoxxx:

Okeeey so I don’t usually post stuff but a friend of mine asked me to make a true crime tag yourself and I thought tumblr might appreciate it. I have no idea why there’s like 400 typos in it I swear English is my first language wtf. Anyway it’s just a meme it’s not meant to be disrespectful or gross or anything please enjoy my completely unfunny sense of humour. (Also I blatantly stole the  d a m a g e d  thing from another tag yourself I apologise)

I’m grandparents live in Korea and Dahmer lol

Way too many Ns *turns to camera in shock* Adam
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Ass, Bad, and Crime: wait, you're jewish?
 i wanna die so bad right now
 -waaaaay too tall
 -blood is 3% soda
 -literally murders innocents and is still
 widely considered a "smol bean"
 -good relationship with their mom
 -hobbies range from making origami to
 plotting to blow up the moon
 -really their height is just unreasonable
 and very intimidating
 i heard you've been saying some shit
 grandparents live in korea
 -little ball of anger
 -uses napalm as moisturiser
 -no one is sure if they're actually
 racist or not
 thinks they can speak german
 -lists "kicking inanimate objects"
 as a hobby
 got sold fake cocaine once
 about me on your blog
 -damaged
 -iterally no one can bring themselves to like
 -communicates only in grunts
 -writes terrible fiction
 -goes out of their way to upset others
 -trying desperately to hide the gay (failing)
 -says shit like "adios" (doesn't speak spanish
 -leaves agressive voicemails
 -used to be emo
 -gets drunk and stabs inanimate objects
 -has an alien girlfriends and also 700 alter egos
 -is 103% sure that the world is out to get them
 way too many Ns
 little miss finland
 turns to camera in shock ADAM
 supreme gentleman
 -absolutely deplorable
 shoves an american flag up their ass
 most mornings
 takes selfies everywhere
 -everywhere i said
 loves their pets
 -finds depressive thinking arousing
 horrible handwriting
 tries. fails.
 -wants to be Wait, You're Jewish? but can't does rude shit but no one can stay
 -uses air quotes to patronise others
 -"feminism is stupid"
 -can't get laid
 -has probably had lip injections. and ego
 injections.
 "why do girls always go for douchebags"
 -wears sunglasses indoors. at night. in
 december. after the last star in the galaxy
 has burned out.
 mad at them
 -all gods are fictional except for themselfays gets asked for I.D.
 -makes fun of soccer moms but doesn't act hasn't taken a flattering photo in 7
 -says weird shit 97% of the time
 -wears t-shirts with edgy slogans
 -has v few friends but the friendships they clasifies self as a "cool kid"
 will not get a haircut
 hasn't slept ever
 do have a frighteningly intense
 56
 brennan's burger bundies
 gets what they want because they are-worships satan
 -known as the zodiac killer
 -takes off their glasses and becomes
 ets
 morbid sense of humour that
 occasionally gets them in trouble
 wants to have you (over) for dinner
 behaves drunk while sober and also
 while drunk.
 -vastly overestimates their ability to get
 away with things
 -does absolutely nothing in a group
 project and no one gets mad
 -dog person
 -has brushed their teeth less than 7
 times since birth
 probably borrowed their cheekbones
 off a meth addict
 -greasy grease on top of their grease
jeffreysdrunk:

luvoxxx:

Okeeey so I don’t usually post stuff but a friend of mine asked me to make a true crime tag yourself and I thought tumblr might appreciate it. I have no idea why there’s like 400 typos in it I swear English is my first language wtf. Anyway it’s just a meme it’s not meant to be disrespectful or gross or anything please enjoy my completely unfunny sense of humour. (Also I blatantly stole the  d a m a g e d  thing from another tag yourself I apologise)

I’m grandparents live in Korea and Dahmer lol

Way too many Ns *turns to camera in shock* Adam
                
            

            
            
jeffreysdrunk:

luvoxxx:

Okeeey so I don’t usually post stuff but a friend of mine asked me to make a true crime tag yourself and I thought...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            




    Tumblr, Blog, and Http: THEGSD
mygermanshepherd:
Kinda enjoying these foggy mornings 
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Tumblr, Blog, and Http: THEGSD
mygermanshepherd:
Kinda enjoying these foggy mornings 
                
            

            
            
mygermanshepherd:
Kinda enjoying these foggy mornings 

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Hello, How, and Kitten: How my kitten greets me in the mornings
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Hello, How, and Kitten: How my kitten greets me in the mornings
                
                

                
            

            
            
How my kitten greets me in the mornings

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            




    Hello, How, and Kitten: How my kitten greets me in the mornings
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Hello, How, and Kitten: How my kitten greets me in the mornings
                
                

                
            

            
            
How my kitten greets me in the mornings

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            




    Animals, Bad, and Cats: vet-and-wild
 The weird wavs l 've
 accidentally trained my
 cat to wake me up
 I can't stand animals that are obnoxious in the mornings when
 they want to get up and be fed. So, l've taken a pretty hard
 stance on ignoring obnoxious morning behavior to avoid
 reinforcing it. However, Garrus is a very fast learner, and he's
 noticed that there's a few things I'm really bad at ignoring. I've
 created the most bizarre alarm
 1. Chowing on my phono oord. Ho only dooo it in tho morning
 when he wants me to get up. I've never seen him do it any
 other time. It's really hard for me to ignore my cat chewing on
 something plugged into an outlet. And so I have accidentally
 trained him to chew on it when I'm being stubborn and I don't
 want to get out of bed. Solution: unplug the phone and go
 back to sleep.
 2. Swatting at my curtains. He likes to do it when he has the
 night zoomies and l'm trying to sleep instead of giving him
 attention. It's a really annoying sound. Like, REALLY
 annoying. And in my half-asleep state, my initial response
 was to grumble and tell him to knock it off. Didn't work so well
 for a cat that is doing an obnoxious behavior to get attention
 He didn't care that I was yelling at him-he was getting the
 attention he wanted. The one time l was just too exhausted to
 deal with him and didn't respond, he gave up pretty quickly.
 That'o whon I roalizod ho'd boon playing mo. Now I juot
 ignore it and he stops pretty fast.
 3. Changing the temperature on my snake's HerpStat. I don't
 even know how he started this one, but one day I was
 lounging in my bed in the morning and I heard the HerpStat
 beeping like it does when the temp has been changed. And l
 panicked because I didn't want my snake being burnt to a
 crisp! Big mistake. My sudden movement out of bed
 reinforced Garrus, and for the next few days l'd wake up to
 beeping. I don't know if he was biting it, or nudging it, or what
 but my attempts to scold him only caused him to make happy
 "murrrrp" noises because I was acknowledging his presence. I
 have now placed the HerpStat in a high open drawer so he
 can't reach it. But I'm still kind of in shock that he learned to
 do this. Little punk.
 l think Pavlov is laughing at me
 clickercake
 Accidentally reinforced behaviors are an absolute riot
 clickerpunk
 Omg my mornings are EXACTLY like this. But my cat has
 discovered that if she scratches the floor i shoot out of bed
 because i dont want her peeing on the floor or something..
 The moment i sit up in bed she goes "brrrp!" because im
 awake.. Damn smart cats
 Source: vet-and-wild
 287 notes
Cat training
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Animals, Bad, and Cats: vet-and-wild
 The weird wavs l 've
 accidentally trained my
 cat to wake me up
 I can't stand animals that are obnoxious in the mornings when
 they want to get up and be fed. So, l've taken a pretty hard
 stance on ignoring obnoxious morning behavior to avoid
 reinforcing it. However, Garrus is a very fast learner, and he's
 noticed that there's a few things I'm really bad at ignoring. I've
 created the most bizarre alarm
 1. Chowing on my phono oord. Ho only dooo it in tho morning
 when he wants me to get up. I've never seen him do it any
 other time. It's really hard for me to ignore my cat chewing on
 something plugged into an outlet. And so I have accidentally
 trained him to chew on it when I'm being stubborn and I don't
 want to get out of bed. Solution: unplug the phone and go
 back to sleep.
 2. Swatting at my curtains. He likes to do it when he has the
 night zoomies and l'm trying to sleep instead of giving him
 attention. It's a really annoying sound. Like, REALLY
 annoying. And in my half-asleep state, my initial response
 was to grumble and tell him to knock it off. Didn't work so well
 for a cat that is doing an obnoxious behavior to get attention
 He didn't care that I was yelling at him-he was getting the
 attention he wanted. The one time l was just too exhausted to
 deal with him and didn't respond, he gave up pretty quickly.
 That'o whon I roalizod ho'd boon playing mo. Now I juot
 ignore it and he stops pretty fast.
 3. Changing the temperature on my snake's HerpStat. I don't
 even know how he started this one, but one day I was
 lounging in my bed in the morning and I heard the HerpStat
 beeping like it does when the temp has been changed. And l
 panicked because I didn't want my snake being burnt to a
 crisp! Big mistake. My sudden movement out of bed
 reinforced Garrus, and for the next few days l'd wake up to
 beeping. I don't know if he was biting it, or nudging it, or what
 but my attempts to scold him only caused him to make happy
 "murrrrp" noises because I was acknowledging his presence. I
 have now placed the HerpStat in a high open drawer so he
 can't reach it. But I'm still kind of in shock that he learned to
 do this. Little punk.
 l think Pavlov is laughing at me
 clickercake
 Accidentally reinforced behaviors are an absolute riot
 clickerpunk
 Omg my mornings are EXACTLY like this. But my cat has
 discovered that if she scratches the floor i shoot out of bed
 because i dont want her peeing on the floor or something..
 The moment i sit up in bed she goes "brrrp!" because im
 awake.. Damn smart cats
 Source: vet-and-wild
 287 notes
Cat training
                
            

            
            
Cat training