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Cute, Tumblr, and Blog: SO CUTE lifepro-tips: Cute cat sleeping in strange position This kitten is only two months old and likes to sleep on the lap of his owner. Suddenly he wakes up by a noise.
Cute, Tumblr, and Blog: SO CUTE
lifepro-tips:

Cute cat sleeping in strange position

This kitten is only two months old and likes to sleep on the lap of his owner. Suddenly he wakes up by a noise.

lifepro-tips: Cute cat sleeping in strange position This kitten is only two months old and likes to sleep on the lap of his owner. Suddenl...

Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

Android, Birthday, and Christmas: Mevan ls @MeAndVan Hi internet, this is a longshot BUT I was a refugee for 5 yrs in the 90s and this man, who worked at a refugee camp near Zwolle in the Netherlands, out of the kindness of his own heart bought heart exploded with joy. I just want to know his name. Help? me a bike. My five year old 12 aug. 19 om 17:00 Twitter for Android Mevan las @MeAndVan WE FOUND HIM!! A thread After 3000 RTs, 3 news articles, 1 video and thousands of wonderful messages from around the world, @Arjen78 made contact with the family! Guys, I knew the internet was great but this is something else. Mevan | l@MeAndVan 22m Not only did I find him, but I've also had other refugees reach out to me and tell me that him and his wife helped them too! Their kindness has touched so many lives. One woman said "they weren't friends to me, they were family" Mevan | la @MeAndVan 22m AND someone else who worked at the camp got in touch, Sandra, she was incredible too, she helped me use a computer for the first time! I now work in tech! More so than anything I remember these small kindnesses growing up, they helped shape me. Mevan | ls@MeAndVan 14u For those wondering here what five year old Mevan looked like. This was my fifth birthday in the refugee camp in Zwolle She doesn't even know that an incredible bike is coming her way aaaany day now! Deze collectie weergeven 33 1 Mevan l@MeAndVan 23m Later today, 24 years later, I get to meet him in person! Thank you to everyone who made that possible, to every single person who RT'd and to those who sent messages. Special thanks to @Janske1 @Arjen78 @ds Zwolle. I will update this thread with how it goes! WISH ME LUCK! 17 101 t6 Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago
Android, Birthday, and Christmas: Mevan ls
 @MeAndVan
 Hi internet, this is a longshot BUT I
 was a refugee for 5 yrs in the 90s and
 this man, who worked at a refugee
 camp near Zwolle in the Netherlands,
 out of the kindness of his own heart
 bought
 heart exploded with joy. I just want to
 know his name. Help?
 me a bike. My five year old
 12 aug. 19 om 17:00 Twitter for Android
 Mevan las
 @MeAndVan
 WE FOUND HIM!! A thread
 After 3000 RTs, 3 news articles, 1
 video and thousands of wonderful
 messages from around the world,
 @Arjen78 made contact with the
 family!
 Guys, I knew the internet was great
 but this is something else.
 Mevan | l@MeAndVan 22m
 Not only did I find him, but I've also had other
 refugees reach out to me and tell me that him
 and his wife helped them too! Their kindness
 has touched so many lives. One woman said
 "they weren't friends to me, they were family"
 Mevan | la @MeAndVan 22m
 AND someone else who worked at the camp
 got in touch, Sandra, she was incredible too,
 she helped me use a computer for the first
 time! I now work in tech!
 More so than anything I remember these
 small kindnesses growing up, they helped
 shape me.
 Mevan | ls@MeAndVan 14u
 For those wondering here what five year
 old Mevan looked like. This was my fifth
 birthday in the refugee camp in Zwolle
 She doesn't even know that an incredible
 bike is coming her way aaaany day now!
 Deze collectie weergeven
 33
 1
 Mevan l@MeAndVan 23m
 Later today, 24 years later, I get to meet him
 in person!
 Thank you to everyone who made that
 possible, to every single person who RT'd and
 to those who sent messages. Special thanks
 to @Janske1 @Arjen78 @ds Zwolle.
 I will update this thread with how it goes!
 WISH ME LUCK!
 17
 101
 t6
Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago

Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago

Fucking, Horses, and News: sartorialadventure: captainoftheseaqueen: xcgirl08: shoujofeels: becausetheinternet: A 2500 year old mummy that had some amazing tattoos. WHAT. NO FUCKING WAY. YO HOLD ON.  IT GETS BETTER. This mummy, found in the  Altai mountains of Siberia, is actually that of a young woman who died at about the age of twenty-five; she is thought to have been a member of the Pazyryk tribe. She was buried with six horses and two similarly-tattooed men (the horned griffon that decorates her shoulder also appears on the man buried closest to her, covering most of his right side), possibly escorts. She was also wearing a horse-hair wig, silk, and elaborate boots, which is all a level of ceremony that would have likely only been accorded to a woman of high rank. You didn’t get inked like this unless you were very important, and had worked your way up to that importance.  …Hence, of course, the references to her by researchers as ‘The Ukok Princess,’ although due to the lack of weapons in her grave they have concluded that the woman was in fact a healer or a storyteller.   And now I’m all consumed with curiosity: Who was she? What amazing things did she accomplish? Why these symbols, and what did they mean? Who were the two men alongside her? The most informative article about it can be found here, although I would completely eat up any other information you guys could find.  @blackbearmagic Makes me think of the 5,000-year-old Persian woman they found who was 6 feet tall and had a golden prosthetic eye.
Fucking, Horses, and News: sartorialadventure:
captainoftheseaqueen:

xcgirl08:

shoujofeels:

becausetheinternet:

A 2500 year old mummy that had some amazing tattoos.

WHAT.
NO FUCKING WAY.

YO HOLD ON. 
IT GETS BETTER.
This mummy, found in the  Altai mountains of Siberia, is actually that of a young woman who died at about the age of twenty-five; she is thought to have been a member of the Pazyryk tribe.
She was buried with six horses and two similarly-tattooed men (the horned griffon that decorates her shoulder also appears on the man buried closest to her, covering most of his right side), possibly escorts. She was also wearing a horse-hair wig, silk, and elaborate boots, which is all a level of ceremony that would have likely only been accorded to a woman of high rank. You didn’t get inked like this unless you were very important, and had worked your way up to that importance. 
…Hence, of course, the references to her by researchers as ‘The Ukok Princess,’ although due to the lack of weapons in her grave they have concluded that the woman was in fact a healer or a storyteller.  
And now I’m all consumed with curiosity: Who was she? What amazing things did she accomplish? Why these symbols, and what did they mean? Who were the two men alongside her?
The most informative article about it can be found here, although I would completely eat up any other information you guys could find. 


@blackbearmagic

Makes me think of the 5,000-year-old Persian woman they found who was 6 feet tall and had a golden prosthetic eye.

sartorialadventure: captainoftheseaqueen: xcgirl08: shoujofeels: becausetheinternet: A 2500 year old mummy that had some amazing tattoos...

Alive, America, and Asian: did you know? Photographer Diana Kim, whose father abandoned her when she was 5, wanted to document the lives of the homeless. Searching for subjects on the streets, she came upon a thin and distant man in rags who looked somewhat familiar. It was her father. By fate or by chance, she'd found him after 25 years. PHOTO: DIANA KIM DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM did-you-know: He had schizophrenia. He didn’t recognize her. She did everything she could to connect with him, but he refused treatment, medication, food, or new clothing. Eventually, he said to her: “Diana, I am so sorry for not being in your life. I am so happy that you have a family of your own now. Do better for them… … Don’t worry about me or what everyone says about me. If you want to make me proud and happy, be there for your family the way your mom and I never were. Stop trying to save everyone…just worry about yourself and your family. And don’t forget why I named you Diana, you are the light within the darkness.” So she refused to give up. After suffering a heart attack, he agreed to get help and slowly took control of his own life. One day he suddenly called her to invite her out for coffee. Later that afternoon, she wrote on her blog: “I feel like I just met my father for the first time today.” “I struggled to reconcile my feelings toward my father’s absence in my life, while continuing to care deeply for him and other homeless individuals.” “Over time, I learned to navigate through my feelings of desperation and became more vocal in my community about my father’s condition and what it’s like to watch a loved one battle mental illness.” He is now doing very well, and they are rebuilding their relationship from the ground up. “So long as we are alive in this world, every day is an opportunity to take hold of that ‘second chance.’ There is no failure unless you give up, and he never gave up. And I haven’t given up on him.” Source
Alive, America, and Asian: did you know?
 Photographer Diana Kim, whose
 father abandoned her when she
 was 5, wanted to document the
 lives of the homeless. Searching
 for subjects on the streets, she
 came upon a thin and distant man
 in rags who looked somewhat familiar.
 It was her father. By fate or by chance,
 she'd found him after 25 years.
 PHOTO: DIANA KIM
 DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM
did-you-know:


He had schizophrenia. He didn’t recognize her. She did everything she could to connect with him, but he refused treatment, medication, food, or new clothing.


Eventually, he said to her: “Diana, I am so sorry for not being in your life. I am so happy that you have a family of your own now. Do better for them…
… Don’t worry about me or what everyone says about me. If you want to make me proud and happy, be there for your family the way your mom and I never were. Stop trying to save everyone…just worry about yourself and your family. And don’t forget why I named you Diana, you are the light within the darkness.” So she refused to give up.
After suffering a heart attack, he agreed to get help and slowly took control of his own life.
One day he suddenly called her to invite her out for coffee. Later that afternoon, she wrote on her blog: “I feel like I just met my father for the first time today.”
“I struggled to reconcile my feelings toward my father’s absence in my life, while continuing to care deeply for him and other homeless individuals.”
“Over time, I learned to navigate through my feelings of desperation and became more vocal in my community about my father’s condition and what it’s like to watch a loved one battle mental illness.”
He is now doing very well, and they are rebuilding their relationship from the ground up. “So long as we are alive in this world, every day is an opportunity to take hold of that ‘second chance.’ There is no failure unless you give up, and he never gave up. And I haven’t given up on him.”
Source

did-you-know: He had schizophrenia. He didn’t recognize her. She did everything she could to connect with him, but he refused treatment, m...

Advice, Being Alone, and America: Anna Breslaw @annabreslavw My sister is doing arn experiment: Whenever men walk towards her, she doesn't move out of the way first. So far she has collided with 28 men. 12/13/14, 5:04 PNM marithlizard: taraljc: seperis: sapphic-pink-kryptonite: phoenixonwheels: linkedsoul: little-miss-stan: elegantmess100: blossombarnes: retroasgardian: reddobastard: onethingconstant: songbirde108: mercurialkitty: emmagrant01: clevermanka: youcangofindatree: moremetalthanyourmom: Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move Gotta try it I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with. Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path. Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!” I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way. Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze. Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note. I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston. I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible. Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America. WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA It’s called the Murder Strut. IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!! A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post. One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him. It works wonders. In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them. If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm. Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America. Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how. Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you. Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds. I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 
Advice, Being Alone, and America: Anna Breslaw
 @annabreslavw
 My sister is doing arn
 experiment: Whenever men
 walk towards her, she doesn't
 move out of the way first. So
 far she has collided with 28
 men.
 12/13/14, 5:04 PNM
marithlizard:

taraljc:

seperis:


sapphic-pink-kryptonite:

phoenixonwheels:

linkedsoul:

little-miss-stan:

elegantmess100:


blossombarnes:

retroasgardian:


reddobastard:

onethingconstant:


songbirde108:


mercurialkitty:


emmagrant01:


clevermanka:


youcangofindatree:


moremetalthanyourmom:

Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move

Gotta try it


I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.


Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path. 
Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!”


I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.


Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.


Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.
I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston.
I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible.
Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.


WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA




It’s called the Murder Strut.

IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!!


A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post. 

One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him.
It works wonders.


In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them. 
If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm. 


Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.
Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how.
Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you.
Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds.


I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT

Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 

marithlizard: taraljc: seperis: sapphic-pink-kryptonite: phoenixonwheels: linkedsoul: little-miss-stan: elegantmess100: blossombar...

Apparently, Bitch, and Dude: Hacker Scripts Based on a true story: build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, Xxx: OK, so, our that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxx: kumar-asshole.sh scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help" "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxx: hangover.sh another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 () seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those XX: A true programmer
Apparently, Bitch, and Dude: Hacker Scripts
 Based on a true story:
 build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know,
 Xxx: OK, so, our
 that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something anything
 - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.
 xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"
 xxx: You're gonna love this
 xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons
 from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server
 after 9pm with his login.
 xxx: kumar-asshole.sh scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help"
 "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database
 to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".
 xxx: hangover.sh another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna
 work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive
 sessions on the server at 8:45am.
 xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to
 our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and
 running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits
 another 24 () seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from
 the dudes desk.
 xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those
 XX:
A true programmer

A true programmer