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Bad, Beyonce, and Booty: If you don't pet him, you're a monster. Pic: reddit u/coal the slaw @DrSmashlove So yesterday I had about 12 hours of work to knock out and as the night got older, I had to leave the warm, familiar confines of my go-to Mom-and-Pop coffee joints that serve coffee made with love, care, affection and human warmth (and therefore close early so that they wonderful baristas can go act in plays and paint paintings and do other artsy tings that allow them to form doves and angels and birds in yo latte) and head to the barren desert land that is Starbucks, where they serve piping-hot burnt sludge-water brewed from the charcoal grains of Hell. Literally Starbucks got a long term supply agreement with Satan where they pay half they net revenue to ol dude with the red goat face and long tail and in return he supply them with coffee that shouldn’t be served to maximum security prisoners bruv. BUT THEY OPEN 24-7 BECAUSE SATAN NEVER SLEEPS - HE’S ALWAYS WREAKING HAVOC (except during Ramadan πŸ€—πŸ˜‚). Anyway so I’m there and they got the nerve. The cot damn NERVE...to play a playlist where Jay and BeyoncΓ© are followed by Johnny Cash which is followed by β€œTill the Lights Come On” by Sun Rai (I had to Google the lyrics. No offense Sun Rai u probably a star of some sort but ya music sound like booty cheeks NO OFFENSE πŸ€—). Who did this? Who is RESPONSIBLE for this? In addition to obtaining they coffee supply from Satan, do they also let him hook up the playlists? How I’m pose to concentrate when y’all playing Jakob Dylan followed by Echosmith? I have ADD. Is this playlist meant to melt the remaining shred of sanity I have? Y’all serve coffee that’s stronger than bad cocaine and y’all play music that is jarring, discordant and unharmonious - combine the two and I now have the subtle urge to punch a baby πŸ€—. Y’all absolutely some criminals for this lmao. Change that mermaid on ya cup to Lucifer because this is the last time I ever fux with y’all devilish establishment - AWAY FROM ME, SATAN! πŸ€—πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Bad, Beyonce, and Booty: If you don't pet him, you're a monster.
 Pic: reddit u/coal the slaw
 @DrSmashlove
So yesterday I had about 12 hours of work to knock out and as the night got older, I had to leave the warm, familiar confines of my go-to Mom-and-Pop coffee joints that serve coffee made with love, care, affection and human warmth (and therefore close early so that they wonderful baristas can go act in plays and paint paintings and do other artsy tings that allow them to form doves and angels and birds in yo latte) and head to the barren desert land that is Starbucks, where they serve piping-hot burnt sludge-water brewed from the charcoal grains of Hell. Literally Starbucks got a long term supply agreement with Satan where they pay half they net revenue to ol dude with the red goat face and long tail and in return he supply them with coffee that shouldn’t be served to maximum security prisoners bruv. BUT THEY OPEN 24-7 BECAUSE SATAN NEVER SLEEPS - HE’S ALWAYS WREAKING HAVOC (except during Ramadan πŸ€—πŸ˜‚). Anyway so I’m there and they got the nerve. The cot damn NERVE...to play a playlist where Jay and BeyoncΓ© are followed by Johnny Cash which is followed by β€œTill the Lights Come On” by Sun Rai (I had to Google the lyrics. No offense Sun Rai u probably a star of some sort but ya music sound like booty cheeks NO OFFENSE πŸ€—). Who did this? Who is RESPONSIBLE for this? In addition to obtaining they coffee supply from Satan, do they also let him hook up the playlists? How I’m pose to concentrate when y’all playing Jakob Dylan followed by Echosmith? I have ADD. Is this playlist meant to melt the remaining shred of sanity I have? Y’all serve coffee that’s stronger than bad cocaine and y’all play music that is jarring, discordant and unharmonious - combine the two and I now have the subtle urge to punch a baby πŸ€—. Y’all absolutely some criminals for this lmao. Change that mermaid on ya cup to Lucifer because this is the last time I ever fux with y’all devilish establishment - AWAY FROM ME, SATAN! πŸ€—πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

So yesterday I had about 12 hours of work to knock out and as the night got older, I had to leave the warm, familiar confines of my go-to Mo...

Anaconda, Ass, and Baseball: u/Thigpenology 1d i.redd.it I met this local wet-nosed pup at the bar, his name is Smudge @DrSmashlove Playoff baseball is upon us. Now some of u ladies who grew up with brothers and-or a father (who was actually present πŸ€—) already know a thing or two about sports. Matter fact y’all know a LOT about sports, y’all be at the bars with your blond pony tail hanging out the back of your cubs snap back recalling stats like a cot damn baseball announcer lol. But some of y’all - like me (raised with sisters πŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈπŸ˜‚) - don’t know shiiiiiiiiit. Zero. Nada. And that’s completely fine! Sports are gay! (No offense to sports fans or homosexuals - I’m just saying let’s call it what it is - if u a man who spend his days admiring men in tight pants then u a lil gay! Just a lil bit πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜‚). But anyway when it come to baseball it’s one way to easily cheat and participate in any baseball discussion. As soon as a discussion about an impending baseball game come up, say one thing. Just one. U ready? β€œWho’s pitching?” Bam. BAM. Wind that boy up and let his ass go. Watch his ass talk for 45 MINUTES about the pitchers on both sides. β€œWell for the Nats it’s Strasburg - dude is INCREDIBLE - fastballs over 100 mph” etc etc until you fall asleep face down in yo burger and fries u feel me? But u let him talk. That’s all it is - talking. I go out on dates and afterward the girl be like β€œwe clicked - you’re amazing - talking to u felt so natural β˜ΊοΈβ€ and I’m thinking β€œyeah bish because I ain’t talk! You talked and I nodded! U talked enuf for both of us witchoe tawkin ass!” πŸ˜‚ But real talk just say it with me: β€œwho’s pitching?” And let him talk his sh!t. And watch him text his family the next day talmbout β€œOMG I MET A GIRL NAMED MEGAN AND SHE’S BEAUTIFUL AND SHE LOVES BASEBALL” and his sister Karen just like β€œfinally! You ex Kelly hated baseball! That b!tch!” Now y’all getting married. U feel me? U choosing bridesmaids dresses and picking appetizers for the wedding off of β€œwho’s pitching?” Warning: don’t say β€œwho’s on the mound?” That’s a little too manly baby girl u don’t want him thinking yo armpits hairy lol. β€œwho’s on the mound?” That’s like calling him β€œbro” ... like Bryson Tiller said: β€œDon’t.” Who’s pitching? Now go get married Megan bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Anaconda, Ass, and Baseball: u/Thigpenology 1d i.redd.it
 I met this local wet-nosed pup at the bar, his
 name is Smudge
 @DrSmashlove
Playoff baseball is upon us. Now some of u ladies who grew up with brothers and-or a father (who was actually present πŸ€—) already know a thing or two about sports. Matter fact y’all know a LOT about sports, y’all be at the bars with your blond pony tail hanging out the back of your cubs snap back recalling stats like a cot damn baseball announcer lol. But some of y’all - like me (raised with sisters πŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈπŸ˜‚) - don’t know shiiiiiiiiit. Zero. Nada. And that’s completely fine! Sports are gay! (No offense to sports fans or homosexuals - I’m just saying let’s call it what it is - if u a man who spend his days admiring men in tight pants then u a lil gay! Just a lil bit πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜‚). But anyway when it come to baseball it’s one way to easily cheat and participate in any baseball discussion. As soon as a discussion about an impending baseball game come up, say one thing. Just one. U ready? β€œWho’s pitching?” Bam. BAM. Wind that boy up and let his ass go. Watch his ass talk for 45 MINUTES about the pitchers on both sides. β€œWell for the Nats it’s Strasburg - dude is INCREDIBLE - fastballs over 100 mph” etc etc until you fall asleep face down in yo burger and fries u feel me? But u let him talk. That’s all it is - talking. I go out on dates and afterward the girl be like β€œwe clicked - you’re amazing - talking to u felt so natural β˜ΊοΈβ€ and I’m thinking β€œyeah bish because I ain’t talk! You talked and I nodded! U talked enuf for both of us witchoe tawkin ass!” πŸ˜‚ But real talk just say it with me: β€œwho’s pitching?” And let him talk his sh!t. And watch him text his family the next day talmbout β€œOMG I MET A GIRL NAMED MEGAN AND SHE’S BEAUTIFUL AND SHE LOVES BASEBALL” and his sister Karen just like β€œfinally! You ex Kelly hated baseball! That b!tch!” Now y’all getting married. U feel me? U choosing bridesmaids dresses and picking appetizers for the wedding off of β€œwho’s pitching?” Warning: don’t say β€œwho’s on the mound?” That’s a little too manly baby girl u don’t want him thinking yo armpits hairy lol. β€œwho’s on the mound?” That’s like calling him β€œbro” ... like Bryson Tiller said: β€œDon’t.” Who’s pitching? Now go get married Megan bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Playoff baseball is upon us. Now some of u ladies who grew up with brothers and-or a father (who was actually present πŸ€—) already know a thin...

Bowser, Friday, and Golden State Warriors: D.C. Mayor Welcomes Golden State Warriors "If Anyone Ever Tells You That You Cannot Come to D.C., Tell Them Mayor Bowser Invited You" @balleralert D.C. Mayor Welcomes Golden State Warriors β€œIf Anyone Ever Tells You That You Cannot Come to D.C., Tell Them Mayor Bowser Invited You” - blogged by @MsJennyb β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € On Friday, StephCurry shared his opinion about the Golden State Warriors’ championship visit to the White House. Although he didn’t want to go for his own personal beliefs, the final decision would be left up to the team and organization. However, before the team was able to decide for themselves, Trump took offense to Curry’s statement and withdrew the invitation, prompting a Twitter storm of backlash. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € In turn, the Warriors released a statement, saying they would use their trip to D.C. to embrace their team values of equality and inclusion. Shortly after the team’s announcement, another elected official in D.C. welcomed the team to the nation’s capital. D.C. Mayor MurielBowser shared a statement on social media welcoming the team to practice their First Amendment rights and-or lose to their beloved Washington Wizards during Warriors’ visit in February. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β€œWe are Washington, D.C. We are proud to be our nation’s capital,” Bowser said. β€œWe welcome over 20 million visitors a year. Whether you’re here to work, play, practice your First Amendment rights, or lose to our Wizards, we welcome all to visit our museums, our monuments, our restaurants, and our thriving neighborhoods if they do so peacefully and respectfully. While you’re here, Warriors, we are happy to identify ways for you to celebrate equality, diversity and inclusion – what we call DC values. And if anyone ever tells you that you cannot come to DC, tell them Muriel Bowser invited you.”
Bowser, Friday, and Golden State Warriors: D.C. Mayor Welcomes Golden State Warriors "If
 Anyone Ever Tells You That You Cannot Come
 to D.C., Tell Them Mayor Bowser Invited You"
 @balleralert
D.C. Mayor Welcomes Golden State Warriors β€œIf Anyone Ever Tells You That You Cannot Come to D.C., Tell Them Mayor Bowser Invited You” - blogged by @MsJennyb β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € On Friday, StephCurry shared his opinion about the Golden State Warriors’ championship visit to the White House. Although he didn’t want to go for his own personal beliefs, the final decision would be left up to the team and organization. However, before the team was able to decide for themselves, Trump took offense to Curry’s statement and withdrew the invitation, prompting a Twitter storm of backlash. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € In turn, the Warriors released a statement, saying they would use their trip to D.C. to embrace their team values of equality and inclusion. Shortly after the team’s announcement, another elected official in D.C. welcomed the team to the nation’s capital. D.C. Mayor MurielBowser shared a statement on social media welcoming the team to practice their First Amendment rights and-or lose to their beloved Washington Wizards during Warriors’ visit in February. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β€œWe are Washington, D.C. We are proud to be our nation’s capital,” Bowser said. β€œWe welcome over 20 million visitors a year. Whether you’re here to work, play, practice your First Amendment rights, or lose to our Wizards, we welcome all to visit our museums, our monuments, our restaurants, and our thriving neighborhoods if they do so peacefully and respectfully. While you’re here, Warriors, we are happy to identify ways for you to celebrate equality, diversity and inclusion – what we call DC values. And if anyone ever tells you that you cannot come to DC, tell them Muriel Bowser invited you.”

D.C. Mayor Welcomes Golden State Warriors β€œIf Anyone Ever Tells You That You Cannot Come to D.C., Tell Them Mayor Bowser Invited You” - blog...

Cheating, Fbi, and Kevin Hart: Kevin Hart Victim in Multi-Million Dollair Extortion Scheme, FBl Investigating @balleralert Kevin Hart Victim in Multi-Million Dollar Extortion Scheme, FBI Investigating - blogged by @MsJennyb β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € As KevinHart's cheating scandal unfolds, TMZ reports that the comedian has brought in the FBI to investigate. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € Sources tell the publication that an anonymous person sent the "sexually suggestive" video to Hart's camp, where Hart is seen cozying up with a woman. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € TMZ reports, that the woman has asked for several million dollars to keep the video under wraps. However, the video, which has been obtained and viewed by BallerAlert, appears to have been recorded without Hart's knowledge or consent which is illegal. At the end of the video, the woman describes Hart as a womanizer, as she explains the reasoning behind the leak. She says the video is a lesson to all celebrities to stay "honest, faithful and real." β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € In turn, the FBI has stepped in. According to TMZ, officials say they know who contacted Hart. But, it remains unclear if she was the one who demanded the money or if another party who got ahold of the woman's phone made the demand. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € However, it appears the latter may be the case. β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € As the investigations continues, Hart has the opportunity to sue for the criminal offense.
Cheating, Fbi, and Kevin Hart: Kevin Hart Victim in Multi-Million Dollair
 Extortion Scheme, FBl Investigating
 @balleralert
Kevin Hart Victim in Multi-Million Dollar Extortion Scheme, FBI Investigating - blogged by @MsJennyb β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € As KevinHart's cheating scandal unfolds, TMZ reports that the comedian has brought in the FBI to investigate. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € Sources tell the publication that an anonymous person sent the "sexually suggestive" video to Hart's camp, where Hart is seen cozying up with a woman. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € TMZ reports, that the woman has asked for several million dollars to keep the video under wraps. However, the video, which has been obtained and viewed by BallerAlert, appears to have been recorded without Hart's knowledge or consent which is illegal. At the end of the video, the woman describes Hart as a womanizer, as she explains the reasoning behind the leak. She says the video is a lesson to all celebrities to stay "honest, faithful and real." β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € In turn, the FBI has stepped in. According to TMZ, officials say they know who contacted Hart. But, it remains unclear if she was the one who demanded the money or if another party who got ahold of the woman's phone made the demand. β €β €β €β €β €β €β € However, it appears the latter may be the case. β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € As the investigations continues, Hart has the opportunity to sue for the criminal offense.

Kevin Hart Victim in Multi-Million Dollar Extortion Scheme, FBI Investigating - blogged by @MsJennyb β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β € As KevinHart's cheating...

Anaconda, Bless Up, and Click: u/scigs6 21d i.redd.it This fur baby turns five today! Heads up. Baby girl you have "fit" or "fitness" in your name and u leave a comment I will click on your name 100 times out of 100. Why? Simple. IT'S GUARANTEED TO INCLUDE GROSS MEALS THAT NO HUMAN SHOULD EVER CONSUME BUT I ENJOYING LOOKING AT IT BC IT'S SPICY πŸ€—πŸ˜‚: "chia seeds in coconut milk on a bed of flax blended with kale and eggplant today 😍 VeganFit delicious smoothie". MAMA, STOP THIS SHIT. AIN'T NOTHING DELICIOUS ABOUT THIS UNGODLY CONCOCTION. IF U GON EAT IT TO DEVELOP A SIX PACK THEN MORE LOVE AND MORE LIFE TO U BUT STOP PRETENDING - A BANANA SPLIT IS DELICIOUS - TACOS ARE DELICIOUS - PUNANI IS DELICIOUS πŸ€— - MIXING A WHOLE BUNCH OF INCONGRUOUS PLANTS TOGETHER LIKE THIS LET'S KEEP IT 600 THAT AIN'T DELICIOUS πŸ˜‚. And y'all wanna photograph these concoctions to support each other. "Squash and celery smoothie with hemp seed and spirulina thanks @_fit_jen69 for the recommendation πŸ˜„". WOMAN. STOP LISTENING TO @_fit_jen69 - ONLY A PSYCHOPATH GON MAKE A SMOOTHIE WITH THEM INGREDIENTS - YALL CAN'T BE SERIOUS 😩 (@_fit_jen69 holla at me tho baby girl I happen to like psychopaths plus anyone with the number 69 in they bio is automatic wife material (girls who like 69 is like girls who like riding the dih...dinosaur status...that species damn near extinct 😩)...let's make chirren @_fit_jen69 and let's make a happy home my body is ready (I'm in charge of feeding the chirren tho no offense bless up πŸ€—πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚))
Anaconda, Bless Up, and Click: u/scigs6 21d i.redd.it
 This fur baby turns five today!
Heads up. Baby girl you have "fit" or "fitness" in your name and u leave a comment I will click on your name 100 times out of 100. Why? Simple. IT'S GUARANTEED TO INCLUDE GROSS MEALS THAT NO HUMAN SHOULD EVER CONSUME BUT I ENJOYING LOOKING AT IT BC IT'S SPICY πŸ€—πŸ˜‚: "chia seeds in coconut milk on a bed of flax blended with kale and eggplant today 😍 VeganFit delicious smoothie". MAMA, STOP THIS SHIT. AIN'T NOTHING DELICIOUS ABOUT THIS UNGODLY CONCOCTION. IF U GON EAT IT TO DEVELOP A SIX PACK THEN MORE LOVE AND MORE LIFE TO U BUT STOP PRETENDING - A BANANA SPLIT IS DELICIOUS - TACOS ARE DELICIOUS - PUNANI IS DELICIOUS πŸ€— - MIXING A WHOLE BUNCH OF INCONGRUOUS PLANTS TOGETHER LIKE THIS LET'S KEEP IT 600 THAT AIN'T DELICIOUS πŸ˜‚. And y'all wanna photograph these concoctions to support each other. "Squash and celery smoothie with hemp seed and spirulina thanks @_fit_jen69 for the recommendation πŸ˜„". WOMAN. STOP LISTENING TO @_fit_jen69 - ONLY A PSYCHOPATH GON MAKE A SMOOTHIE WITH THEM INGREDIENTS - YALL CAN'T BE SERIOUS 😩 (@_fit_jen69 holla at me tho baby girl I happen to like psychopaths plus anyone with the number 69 in they bio is automatic wife material (girls who like 69 is like girls who like riding the dih...dinosaur status...that species damn near extinct 😩)...let's make chirren @_fit_jen69 and let's make a happy home my body is ready (I'm in charge of feeding the chirren tho no offense bless up πŸ€—πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚))

Heads up. Baby girl you have "fit" or "fitness" in your name and u leave a comment I will click on your name 100 times out of 100. Why? Simp...

Bitch, College, and Crime: Brock Turner may have avoided real jail time, but a college textbook now uses him in their definition of rape so that's something because his home was mere blocks away- he couu man riding a motorcycle extraoedinarily slowly on a colkd night and d gain, he was arrested. What Chris falled to realize was that the change dr where he lived meant that even his fiest offense was to be treated as a Dui DU, he confronted much more severe consequences with harsher the rak of losing everything-his construction business, girlfriend, friends, cense- because of the zero-tolerance poliky now connected with o Rape Rape is another example of a crime that has sson in its definition over time. While crime and considered mala in se, how it has been has changed. For example, originally, the Fll carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and 2011, the FBI definition was changed to that are considered rape: "penetration, no matter the vagina or anus with a body part or object, tion by a sex organ of another person, without victim This change included boys and men as behavlor beyond the penetration of a vagina by a the FBI removed the word forcibly from this reflect contemporary understanding of this not necessarily involve force, but it does involve a such as when a person is unconscious. A recent example is that of rapist Brock Turner. Turner, a University, was caught in the act, and three felony charges: assault with intent to woman, sexually penetrating an intoxicated object, and sexually penetrating an unconscious p eign object. Turners victim was unconscious rape has Brock Tunet, a Scanford student who raped and assauted an unconscious female college student behind a dumpster at a fraternity party, was recenthy releused from jail after serving only three months. Some it happened behind a trash container outside are shocked at how short this sentence is. Others who fratemity house on campus. are more familiar with the way sexual violence has been Additional c n the criminal hate that stupid bitch
Bitch, College, and Crime: Brock Turner may have avoided real
 jail time, but a college textbook now
 uses him in their definition of rape
 so that's something
 because his
 home was mere blocks away- he couu
 man riding a motorcycle extraoedinarily slowly on a colkd night and d
 gain, he was arrested. What Chris falled to realize was that the change dr
 where he lived meant that even his fiest offense was to be treated as a Dui
 DU, he confronted much more severe consequences with harsher
 the
 rak of losing everything-his construction business, girlfriend, friends,
 cense- because of the zero-tolerance poliky now connected with o
 Rape
 Rape is another example of a crime that has
 sson in its definition over time. While
 crime and considered mala in se, how it has been
 has changed. For example, originally, the Fll
 carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and
 2011, the FBI definition was changed to
 that are considered rape: "penetration, no matter
 the vagina or anus with a body part or object,
 tion by a sex organ of another person, without
 victim This change included boys and men as
 behavlor beyond the penetration of a vagina by a
 the FBI removed the word forcibly from this
 reflect contemporary understanding of this
 not necessarily involve force, but it does involve a
 such as when a person is unconscious. A recent
 example is that of rapist Brock Turner. Turner, a
 University, was caught in the act, and
 three felony charges: assault with intent to
 woman, sexually penetrating an intoxicated
 object, and sexually penetrating an unconscious p
 eign object. Turners victim was unconscious
 rape has
 Brock Tunet, a Scanford student who raped and
 assauted an unconscious female college student
 behind a dumpster at a fraternity party, was recenthy
 releused from jail after serving only three months. Some it happened behind a trash container outside
 are shocked at how short this sentence is. Others who fratemity house on campus.
 are more familiar with the way sexual violence has been
 Additional c
 n the criminal
hate that stupid bitch

hate that stupid bitch

Af, Bad, and Beautiful: Seth Rogen meets Boo In the film "Tropic Thunder", Kirk Lazarus said: "Never go full retard." Now, I hate the word "retard" - I love all life and if a baby has developmental disabilities, nobody should ever call that beautiful baby a retard - it's a disgusting word to use to refer to someone who has such disabilities. However some of u grown men are not only retards, y'all routinely go full retard, NO OFFENSE - lemme splain u. My lil homegirl call me tell me she dating a dude from a nearby town. It ain't that close so they hanging weekly, he make the drive and slide thru, they have dinner etc. Smart dude, teacher, got his shit together. So out of the blue homeboy say he moving to her town so they can plan their future. I can't blame him - she got a lot to offer πŸ‘©β€πŸ”¬. The problem is, she ain't want all that. Some women want a man around for a specific purpose. Maybe she wanna be homies but she don't wanna bang. Maybe she wanna bang but only after 11:02 pm so if y'all get food after, nobody see u with her bc low key u ain't cute but your PP nice so she only want u at night πŸ€—. Or maybe she wanna be seen with you out on the town because u look nice but she ain't ready to pick baby seats and strollers yet - u feel me? U can't just assume that if a girl fuck with u on ANY level, she wanna be with you forever - these ladies done been thru a lot, bro - good relationships, bad relationships, in betweeners - u feel me? Don't be so eager to suck the fun out of it. Men ASSUME that any woman they meet wanna get married yesterday and have babies tomorrow but guess what - NAH. AF. U gotta take the time to sell her on u. Make her feel like u the one. Until then, create fun experiences and a healthy vibe. And see where it go. And don't go full retard or u gon fuck around and fuck up a good thing for no reason. Ya get me! Bless up! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Af, Bad, and Beautiful: Seth Rogen meets Boo
In the film "Tropic Thunder", Kirk Lazarus said: "Never go full retard." Now, I hate the word "retard" - I love all life and if a baby has developmental disabilities, nobody should ever call that beautiful baby a retard - it's a disgusting word to use to refer to someone who has such disabilities. However some of u grown men are not only retards, y'all routinely go full retard, NO OFFENSE - lemme splain u. My lil homegirl call me tell me she dating a dude from a nearby town. It ain't that close so they hanging weekly, he make the drive and slide thru, they have dinner etc. Smart dude, teacher, got his shit together. So out of the blue homeboy say he moving to her town so they can plan their future. I can't blame him - she got a lot to offer πŸ‘©β€πŸ”¬. The problem is, she ain't want all that. Some women want a man around for a specific purpose. Maybe she wanna be homies but she don't wanna bang. Maybe she wanna bang but only after 11:02 pm so if y'all get food after, nobody see u with her bc low key u ain't cute but your PP nice so she only want u at night πŸ€—. Or maybe she wanna be seen with you out on the town because u look nice but she ain't ready to pick baby seats and strollers yet - u feel me? U can't just assume that if a girl fuck with u on ANY level, she wanna be with you forever - these ladies done been thru a lot, bro - good relationships, bad relationships, in betweeners - u feel me? Don't be so eager to suck the fun out of it. Men ASSUME that any woman they meet wanna get married yesterday and have babies tomorrow but guess what - NAH. AF. U gotta take the time to sell her on u. Make her feel like u the one. Until then, create fun experiences and a healthy vibe. And see where it go. And don't go full retard or u gon fuck around and fuck up a good thing for no reason. Ya get me! Bless up! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

In the film "Tropic Thunder", Kirk Lazarus said: "Never go full retard." Now, I hate the word "retard" - I love all life and if a baby has d...

Af, Ass, and Austin Powers: Needless to say, I didn't move for a while See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman 😁...No offense but u don't need this type of negativity in yo life bruh πŸ˜‚. (2) "OMG daddy I need you 😍." She a keeper. That's a good woman. (3) "K. How many other girls got this? Curious πŸ€”." <- wife. This is your wife, u found her bruh πŸ˜‚. U feel me? She protecc. Like the flood waters coming, she gon rip the refrigerator door off the fridge and use it as a raft. She gon paddle your babies to safety. U gon call her from a business trip to NY like "baby u ok I seen the news" and she gon be like "NO I'M NOT OK MF I GOT *YOUR* LOOKIN ASS KIDS TRYINA PADDLE TO SAFETY BC U AIN'T HERE AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEIR FUCKING FACE I GET TIGHT BC I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET U GET ME PREGNANT AND THEN LEAVE ME IN A FLOOD WE'LL DISCUSS LATER BYE." This type of woman will punch u in the face when u wake up for no reason. U sipping a Intelligentsia Black Cat Espresso happy go lucky af ready to take on the day and she walk right up to u with her hair fucked up and punch u exactly in the nose to where yo septum deviate. Yo septum was good AF now it's crooked like Austin Powers teeth lol. And u like "baby??" And she like "YOU CHEATED ON ME IN MY DREAM. WITH A BLOND BITCH. AS I SUSPECTED. MOTHER πŸ‘ FUCKER πŸ‘. BEEN TOLD U. U LIKE BLONDS SO MUCH? GO FIND A BLOND, THEY GROW ON TREES. DON'T WASTE MY MF TIME. GET THE FUCK TO WORK WE TALK LATER." (Crazy women always wanna give u the business and then warn u that another reaming is coming lol.) And u just like "baby I don't have a type, YOU my type" and she just like "YOUR πŸ‘ TYPE πŸ‘ IS πŸ‘ BLOND πŸ‘ YOU πŸ‘ DIRTY πŸ‘ DICK πŸ‘ NIGHTMARE πŸ‘ CHEATER πŸ‘ I πŸ‘ SAID πŸ‘ WE πŸ‘ TALK πŸ‘ LATER." There u have it. Getchu a girl who wild about u bro. If she lukewarm u wasting your time. Get a girl who will kill for u then fuck around KILL u - it's the stabby ones that always got the most firey Punani ya get me! Bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ (πŸ“Έ: Reddit u-lucidf0x)
Af, Ass, and Austin Powers: Needless to say, I didn't move for a while
See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman 😁...No offense but u don't need this type of negativity in yo life bruh πŸ˜‚. (2) "OMG daddy I need you 😍." She a keeper. That's a good woman. (3) "K. How many other girls got this? Curious πŸ€”." <- wife. This is your wife, u found her bruh πŸ˜‚. U feel me? She protecc. Like the flood waters coming, she gon rip the refrigerator door off the fridge and use it as a raft. She gon paddle your babies to safety. U gon call her from a business trip to NY like "baby u ok I seen the news" and she gon be like "NO I'M NOT OK MF I GOT *YOUR* LOOKIN ASS KIDS TRYINA PADDLE TO SAFETY BC U AIN'T HERE AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEIR FUCKING FACE I GET TIGHT BC I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET U GET ME PREGNANT AND THEN LEAVE ME IN A FLOOD WE'LL DISCUSS LATER BYE." This type of woman will punch u in the face when u wake up for no reason. U sipping a Intelligentsia Black Cat Espresso happy go lucky af ready to take on the day and she walk right up to u with her hair fucked up and punch u exactly in the nose to where yo septum deviate. Yo septum was good AF now it's crooked like Austin Powers teeth lol. And u like "baby??" And she like "YOU CHEATED ON ME IN MY DREAM. WITH A BLOND BITCH. AS I SUSPECTED. MOTHER πŸ‘ FUCKER πŸ‘. BEEN TOLD U. U LIKE BLONDS SO MUCH? GO FIND A BLOND, THEY GROW ON TREES. DON'T WASTE MY MF TIME. GET THE FUCK TO WORK WE TALK LATER." (Crazy women always wanna give u the business and then warn u that another reaming is coming lol.) And u just like "baby I don't have a type, YOU my type" and she just like "YOUR πŸ‘ TYPE πŸ‘ IS πŸ‘ BLOND πŸ‘ YOU πŸ‘ DIRTY πŸ‘ DICK πŸ‘ NIGHTMARE πŸ‘ CHEATER πŸ‘ I πŸ‘ SAID πŸ‘ WE πŸ‘ TALK πŸ‘ LATER." There u have it. Getchu a girl who wild about u bro. If she lukewarm u wasting your time. Get a girl who will kill for u then fuck around KILL u - it's the stabby ones that always got the most firey Punani ya get me! Bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ (πŸ“Έ: Reddit u-lucidf0x)

See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman 😁...No offense but u don't ne...