🔥 | Latest

posted: Hey, you made at least one person chuckle in your memes. (Im not sure if something similar has been posted before)
posted: Hey, you made at least one person chuckle in your memes. (Im not sure if something similar has been posted before)

Hey, you made at least one person chuckle in your memes. (Im not sure if something similar has been posted before)

posted: Posted mutherfuckaly
posted: Posted mutherfuckaly

Posted mutherfuckaly

posted: This was posted in one of the DIY groups I’m in. Good guy Jon from the 90s saves another pissed off renovator.
posted: This was posted in one of the DIY groups I’m in. Good guy Jon from the 90s saves another pissed off renovator.

This was posted in one of the DIY groups I’m in. Good guy Jon from the 90s saves another pissed off renovator.

posted: *big happiness noises* y’all I swear I haven’t posted in a fat minute.
posted: *big happiness noises* y’all I swear I haven’t posted in a fat minute.

*big happiness noises* y’all I swear I haven’t posted in a fat minute.

posted: gretlusky: Fanart I never posted
posted: gretlusky:

Fanart I never posted

gretlusky: Fanart I never posted

posted: The guy who posted this got deleted. by XiiMesho_ MORE MEMES
posted: The guy who posted this got deleted. by XiiMesho_
MORE MEMES

The guy who posted this got deleted. by XiiMesho_ MORE MEMES

posted: The guy who posted this got deleted.
posted: The guy who posted this got deleted.

The guy who posted this got deleted.

posted: I posted a while ago about the duck I found on tinder… It’s still going, comment questions you want me to ask and I’ll post an update
posted: I posted a while ago about the duck I found on tinder… It’s still going, comment questions you want me to ask and I’ll post an update

I posted a while ago about the duck I found on tinder… It’s still going, comment questions you want me to ask and I’ll post an update

posted: Im not crying you are. ( hope its not been posted )
posted: Im not crying you are. ( hope its not been posted )

Im not crying you are. ( hope its not been posted )

posted: Also posted on the less good meme subreddit
posted: Also posted on the less good meme subreddit

Also posted on the less good meme subreddit

posted: officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcouture.com hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project! in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community.  it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits.  please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time! But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc. The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged.  But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply. This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it. You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker.  lol that’s my old blog bless :)))))))) @petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT
posted: officialromaniantranslatiuni:
petruparcatoru:

andiiwrites:

dangerdwight:

vrabia:

officialromaniantranslatiuni:
http://www.bihorcouture.com
hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project!
in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community. 
it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits. 
please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time!


But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc.

The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged. 
But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply.
This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it.
You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker. 

lol that’s my old blog bless :))))))))

@petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT

officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcoutur...

posted: Tried a couple of things recently posted here. Reddit really is a beautiful thing
posted: Tried a couple of things recently posted here. Reddit really is a beautiful thing

Tried a couple of things recently posted here. Reddit really is a beautiful thing

posted: if anyone else has posted this I apologize
posted: if anyone else has posted this I apologize

if anyone else has posted this I apologize

posted: if anyone else has posted this I apologize by three-dimensions MORE MEMES
posted: if anyone else has posted this I apologize by three-dimensions
MORE MEMES

if anyone else has posted this I apologize by three-dimensions MORE MEMES

posted: witchesversuspatriarchy: I saw this posted on a nature themed Facebook group and it instantly made me think of this group. Seems perfect for here.
posted: witchesversuspatriarchy:

I saw this posted on a nature themed Facebook group and it instantly made me think of this group. Seems perfect for here.

witchesversuspatriarchy: I saw this posted on a nature themed Facebook group and it instantly made me think of this group. Seems perfect...

posted: Not sure if posted before but it’s amazing none the less
posted: Not sure if posted before but it’s amazing none the less

Not sure if posted before but it’s amazing none the less

posted: georgetheblob-art:I haven’t posted this little doodle here yet?? here please take a them
posted: georgetheblob-art:I haven’t posted this little doodle here yet?? here please take a them

georgetheblob-art:I haven’t posted this little doodle here yet?? here please take a them

posted: My wife doesn’t want our newborn son’s face posted on social media, so she asked me to censor over it. Needless to say, I won’t be asked to do that again.
posted: My wife doesn’t want our newborn son’s face posted on social media, so she asked me to censor over it. Needless to say, I won’t be asked to do that again.

My wife doesn’t want our newborn son’s face posted on social media, so she asked me to censor over it. Needless to say, I won’t be asked...

posted: Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy
posted: Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy

Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy

posted: Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy
posted: Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy

Don’t know if someone posted it before, go easy

posted: Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.
posted: Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.

Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.

posted: Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.
posted: Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.

Sarah Michelle Gellar just posted this on her Instagram. Thought it was pretty funny.

posted: Posted this 3 years ago but still my oc
posted: Posted this 3 years ago but still my oc

Posted this 3 years ago but still my oc

posted: Don’t know if this has been posted before
posted: Don’t know if this has been posted before

Don’t know if this has been posted before

posted: Don’t know if this has been posted before by LifeisFunny69 MORE MEMES
posted: Don’t know if this has been posted before by LifeisFunny69
MORE MEMES

Don’t know if this has been posted before by LifeisFunny69 MORE MEMES

posted: audrey-hepbae: snacfu: liebgoth: weknowwearebeautifulanduglytoo: joekerspades: elitigre: frender: deadfoxforcutie: trashgender-neurotica: blueeyeddl: tikkunolamorgtfo: trashgender-neurotica: When you’re an adult man and you try to troll a little girl but instead she drags you straight to hell. (source) “I’m down with white nationalism but I will clutch my pearls if I hear an F-bomb.” White people in a nutshell. Is he calling her “young man” or “young ma'am”? I can’t tell. Considering it’s infowars, may be relevant either way….. He said “young man”, no doubt in an attempt to launch into anti-trans rhetoric with her as a prop. This is a good way to handle that. why is it that every reactionary white dude talks like this. “oh wow, oh my gosh!! oh golly!! oh jeepers!!” it’s actually a little bit horrifying that he would try to expose a child to the lion den of internet white nationalism by making her a prop to make fun of. but yeah, the little girl is “scandalous” because she rightfully called this grown man a fucking idiot Fun trivia fact: this single clip entirely ended this dumbass dude’s career in Infowars and alt right publication, because no one took him seriously anymore after a “little girl” called him a fucking idiot to his face and all he could do was say wow and oh my gosh. I’m glad. Fuck that guy. Hey that’s me in the 8th grade lol, I use they them pronouns now fank uuuu!!!! Also I still have those same glasses :0 how time flies!! Also if u were wondering how the altercation started I was at this defend DACA protest and my jewish ass was like is that FUCKING infowars harassing an old lady and so I posted the fuck up. Texas style. YOURE MY HERO Long live this hero. May they never need a new prescription.
posted: audrey-hepbae:
snacfu:

liebgoth:


weknowwearebeautifulanduglytoo:

joekerspades:

elitigre:

frender:

deadfoxforcutie:


trashgender-neurotica:

blueeyeddl:

tikkunolamorgtfo:


trashgender-neurotica:

When you’re an adult man and you try to troll a little girl but instead she drags you straight to hell.
(source)

“I’m down with white nationalism but I will clutch my pearls if I hear an F-bomb.” White people in a nutshell.


Is he calling her “young man” or “young ma'am”? I can’t tell. Considering it’s infowars, may be relevant either way….. 

He said “young man”, no doubt in an attempt to launch into anti-trans rhetoric with her as a prop.
This is a good way to handle that.

why is it that every reactionary white dude talks like this. “oh wow, oh my gosh!! oh golly!! oh jeepers!!” 


it’s actually a little bit horrifying that he would try to expose a child to the lion den of internet white nationalism by making her a prop to make fun of. but yeah, the little girl is “scandalous” because she rightfully called this grown man a fucking idiot



Fun trivia fact: this single clip entirely ended this dumbass dude’s career in Infowars and alt right publication, because no one took him seriously anymore after a “little girl” called him a fucking idiot to his face and all he could do was say wow and oh my gosh.



I’m glad. Fuck that guy. 

Hey that’s me in the 8th grade lol, I use they them pronouns now fank uuuu!!!! Also I still have those same glasses :0 how time flies!! Also if u were wondering how the altercation started I was at this defend DACA protest and my jewish ass was like is that FUCKING infowars harassing an old lady and so I posted the fuck up. Texas style.



YOURE MY HERO 



Long live this hero. May they never need a new prescription.

audrey-hepbae: snacfu: liebgoth: weknowwearebeautifulanduglytoo: joekerspades: elitigre: frender: deadfoxforcutie: trashgender-n...

posted: Idk if this was already posted but I just love it
posted: Idk if this was already posted but I just love it

Idk if this was already posted but I just love it

posted: Dunno if it was posted before …
posted: Dunno if it was posted before …

Dunno if it was posted before …

posted: My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion
posted: My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion

My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion

posted: My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion
posted: My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion

My wife posted this photo to commemorate her last chemo treatment. Later, she realized she was dressed like a Minion

posted: cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: This is how the golden age of piracy ended. The first mermaid to get tattoos :) “we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?” “kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes. “we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.” “i know.” x “daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.” her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her. “daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor. “don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing. x “father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?” “your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.” she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says. x “why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam. “we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.” she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family. “it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.” x her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.” the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass. “why not?” the mermaid asks. “he’ll win,” the first mate says. the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks. x the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her. “don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.” x the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape. “let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.” they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her. she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings. the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone. x she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea. x “you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her. she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise. “i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.” the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. “we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either. “i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time. “guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.” “without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?” “i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?” “of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.” x the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid. “you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock. the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy. “they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.” “and now?” “they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?” the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.” She protects her family. Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link! https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817 That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there! HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
posted: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

cereusblue: unnameablethings: dragonsateyourtoast: redporkpadthai: dragonsateyourtoast: otherwindow: otherwindow: This is how the g...

posted: My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area
posted: My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area

My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area

posted: My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area
posted: My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area

My County Visitors Bureau posted these road signs around the area

posted: Posted with Samsung Smart fridge
posted: Posted with Samsung Smart fridge

Posted with Samsung Smart fridge