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Since That: Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer. by shreyapril MORE MEMES
Since That: Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer. by shreyapril
MORE MEMES

Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer. by shreyapril MORE MEMES

Since That: Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer.
Since That: Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer.

Pokemon Go came out in 2016. Nothing has been the same since that summer.

Since That: 2:50 1 ull LTE Today 10:32 AM This is such a weird thing to do. Don't take it as an insult. It's a big compliment actually. I really liked you a lot and I think you are really cute and sweet and funny. So I want to set you up with my good friend if you would be ok with that. I just think you two would have more in common than we do. She likes heavy metal music and she's a nerd and she's shy and beautiful and funny. She's religious though and that's a deal breaker for her if you aren't religious. So two questions, would you want to meet her? And are you religious? Today 11:18 AM I'm super flattered, but l'm very much not religious and totally respect that being a deal breaker. As curious as l'd be to meet her, since that is a deal breaker it's a moot point! I also enjoyed our date last night, you seem like an interesting and attractive woman. But I think there was just a certain chemistry missing, and l'd like to give you the opportunity to find a guy who's a better match for you. Hahaha You're so wonderful! Omg. I'm going to talk to my friend. The entire date I was thinking that you are perfect for her. You two have the same energy. Ugh. Yeah. Religion is a deal breaker for her. You are so nice though! That is the absolute sweetest way anyone has ever turned me down. I wish I had more single female friends to set you up with because you are so sweet and awesome. I would give you 5 stars if I could rate you on here. Hahaha. Sent Aww, you're too sweet. The feeling is mutual. I absolutely wish you and your friend the best of luck with navigating the buffet of guys you both undoubtedly have as options. Like I said, you seem like an amazing girl, just maybe not the amazing girl for me! Send Type a message GIF Stitch It! The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down
Since That: 2:50 1
 ull LTE
 Today 10:32 AM
 This is such a weird thing to do. Don't
 take it as an insult. It's a big
 compliment actually. I really liked you a
 lot and I think you are really cute and
 sweet and funny. So I want to set you
 up with my good friend if you would be
 ok with that. I just think you two would
 have more in common than we do. She
 likes heavy metal music and she's a
 nerd and she's shy and beautiful and
 funny.
 She's religious though and that's a deal
 breaker for her if you aren't religious.
 So two questions, would you want to
 meet her? And are you religious?
 Today 11:18 AM
 I'm super flattered, but l'm very much
 not religious and totally respect that
 being a deal breaker.
 As curious as l'd be to meet her, since
 that is a deal breaker it's a moot point!
 I also enjoyed our date last night, you
 seem like an interesting and attractive
 woman. But I think there was just a
 certain chemistry missing, and l'd like
 to give you the opportunity to find a
 guy who's a better match for you.
 Hahaha
 You're so wonderful! Omg. I'm going to
 talk to my friend. The entire date I was
 thinking that you are perfect for her.
 You two have the same energy.
 Ugh. Yeah. Religion is a deal breaker
 for her. You are so nice though! That is
 the absolute sweetest way anyone has
 ever turned me down. I wish I had more
 single female friends to set you up with
 because you are so sweet and
 awesome.
 I would give you 5 stars if I could rate
 you on here. Hahaha.
 Sent
 Aww, you're too sweet. The feeling is
 mutual. I absolutely wish you and your
 friend the best of luck with navigating
 the buffet of guys you both
 undoubtedly have as options. Like I
 said, you seem like an amazing girl, just
 maybe not the amazing girl for me!
 Send
 Type a message
 GIF
 Stitch It!
The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down

The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down

Since That: Jason Fuller, Contributor Working to bring about the best in America, both on-line and off. Impeachment Is No Longer Enough; Donald Trump Must Face Justice Impeachment and removal from office are only the first steps; for treason and-if convicted in a court of law-executed. 06/11/2017 10:39 pm ET for America to be redeemed, Donald Trump must be prosecuted Donald Trump has been President of the United States for just shy of six months now. I think that most of us among the electorate knew that his presidency would be a relative disaster, but I am not sure how many among us expected the catastrophe our nation now faces. friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: hominishostilis: abstractandedgyname: siryouarebeingmocked: mississpithy: bogleech: notyourmoderate: angrybell: thinksquad: http://archive.is/5VvI5 Huffpo, everybody. Can someone tell me what high crime or misdemeanor Trump has committed that merits this? Or is the HuffPo just publishing outright fantasies? God dammit, I’m now in the position of defending Huffington. I didn’t want to be here. Okay, @angrybell … actually, @ literally everyone who reblogged this uncritically as a tacit endorsement and agreement. Such as @the-critical-feminist that I reblog this from.My first question has to be: are you serious? Don’t read that with a tone, don’t read that as an attack. That’s my first question: Are you asking a serious question about what high crimes or misdemeanors Trump has perpetrated? Are you asking a sincere question or is this the sort of rhetoric that doesn’t translate well into text? And, if you are actually asking this question, are ou going to hear the answer or are you going to immediately start concocting your counter-argument because you just know in your heart that anyone who disagrees with you must be wrong, so you start formulating a plan to prove them wrong before you actually hear what they have to say?Next: did you read the article that was posted in the link you responded to? Because the author of that article does a reasonable job of explaining their thought process behind the headline. Or did you lash out before you read the article? Okay, presuming that you did read the article in good faith, evaluate its points, perform the follow-up research to understand context, and still disagree with the central tenets and simply believe that the author’s reasoning does not hold up for whatever reasons you have chosen not to state, and you believe their source information is falsified for whatever reason you have chosen not to state, I will move on. After I have given you and yours every conceivable benefit of the doubt and every charitable assumption. Because if the article itself doesn’t convince you, there’s the fact that Donald Trump has broken literally every federal law against corruption and conflict of interest. Not one or two, not most, not all but a few. Literally every single law we have against corruption, from the Constitution to the informal guidelines circulated as a memo from the White House ethics scholars. He’s broken literally every one of those rules. He’s openly traded favors for money and favors for months now. Hell, that Chinese influence-peddler that paid him off for sixteen million dollars should have been enough to get him convicted of treason. Sharing code-word level classified information with a government on the opposite side of an ongoing military conflict isn’t *necessarily* treason, unless the information was part of a share program with an allied nation and wasn’t his to distribute. That’s aiding a foreign aggressor at the expense of a military ally, and that’s treason. Giving aid and comfort to enemies of the nation. Obstruction of justice is pretty clear-cut, that’s an impeachment, except that the justice in question is also a matter of national security, so that’s treason. Again. Defaming the former president? Misdemeanor, impeachable. The way he drags his heels nominating posts in Justice and State could be prosecuted as dereliction of duty. If he has tapes of Comey, he’s on the hook for contempt, if he doesn’t then he’s on the hook for witness tampering. Hell, deleting the covfefe tweet is destroying federal records, which is a misdemeanor, and impeachable. The man doesn’t go a week without bringing on an impeachable offense. Strictly speaking, every time he goes to Mar-A-Lago he’s committing grand larceny by fraud, because he’s taking millions of dollars of American funds for his own benefit, after promising not to do that. There are dozens, hundreds maybe, of impeachable offenses already in this 140 days, “high crimes and misdemeanors”. Actual counts of treason, punishable by death by hanging, is probably only five or six counts. Only five or six counts of high treason by our sitting president. His job does not put him above reproach. His job is to *be* above reproach. And he’s failing that job. Trump’s supporters probably believe he’s done nothing impeachable or treasonous because they spent eight years claiming on no grounds whatsoever that Obama was impeachable and treasonous, just because they didn’t like him. They now probably convince themselves that these facts about Trump are as fake as their Obama theories and they’ve ruined the gravity of these terms for themselves. “ His job does not put him above reproach. His job is to *be* above reproach. And he’s failing that job. “ I like how Bogleech doesn’t know many Trump supporters are former Obama supporters. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/04/us/obama-trump-swing-voters.html https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2018/10/16/17980820/trump-obama-2016-race-racism-class-economy-2018-midterm https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obama-Trump_voters It’s not even a secret. But why am I not surprised bogleech - that intellectual titan - failed to do basic research? And last time I checked, no nation required their politicans to be perfect. Which is what NYM is asking for with that quote; perfection. That’s what ‘above reproach’ means. An impossible standard, considering people “reproach” Trump for feeding fish wrong, for his skin color, for any and every little thing, even if they have to twist reality into a pretzel to do it. In fact, I’ve seen people take pictures of kids in cages from 2014, and blame Trump for it. So this: Are you asking a serious question about what high crimes or misdemeanors Trump has perpetrated? Is a question of this: Can someone tell me what high crime or misdemeanor Trump has committed that merits this? Seems you missed the part that says “merits this”. Next: did you read the article that was posted in the link you responded to? Because the author of that article does a reasonable job of explaining their thought process behind the headline. Or did you lash out before you read the article? (The underlined is in the subtitle, not the headline.) Okay, presuming that you did read the article in good faith, evaluate its points, perform the follow-up research to understand context, and still disagree with the central tenets… Context? Central tenets? Do you not know how highlighting works? You don’t need to know the context, or any other point, when you’re indicating a specific, explicit, and isolated quality. The subtitle called for Trump’s execution, we’re 5 paragraphs in and you haven’t even acknowledged that part yet. Or at all, I’m guessing, because I’m not reading further. You keep talking around it. You accuse others, preemptively, of not hearing the answer and pre-”concocting” a response, and yet you’re waffling on about shit around the one, sole, isolated thing that was indicated in the first place. This isn’t about ignoring context, this is about criticising one thing. Which is a thing people are allowed to do, by the way, just because people criticise one thing, doesn’t mean they’re criticising everything about the everyone involved, and everything said before, adjacent to, and after that one thing, and therefore are required to include all of those things in their consideration and assessment of this one thing. The specific criticism of the indicated quality is the advocation of Trump’s execution. That’s it. No context is needed to understand that this is what was said, especially since that which was said, which is being criticised, is explicit. No amount of, “So, click-bait subtitle that you don’t see until you’ve already clicked on the article link out of the way, here’s what I actually meant when I said I wanted this person tried and executed,” could excuse the use of that language, let alone actually believing in it. It’s like… it’s like if someone makes a typo, someone else is like, “Oh, seems you made a typo,” you’d jump in like, “But what about they’re perfectly reasonable spelling everywhere else? Hm? Forced to ignore contextual perfect spelling I see. They’re lack of typos everywhere else explains this typo, and vindicates it”. You and what’s his face, James, fuckin ReasonAndEmpathy or whatever now, y’all keep saying “but what of the context?” when the criterion of criticism is isolated, atomic, specific, and/or explicit. No amount of context invalidates the very specific, singular words explicitly spoken. “Sure he called for Trump to be executed, but he explains himself.” Fucking and? When did the death sentence become ok? When did that happen? Moderates are ok with the death sentence now? Aight, weird. Man this fucking post aged like fine wine, take a SIP Delicious This was quite a ride
Since That: Jason Fuller, Contributor
 Working to bring about the best in America, both on-line and off.
 Impeachment Is No Longer Enough;
 Donald Trump Must Face Justice
 Impeachment and removal from office are only the first steps;
 for treason and-if convicted in a court of law-executed.
 06/11/2017 10:39 pm ET
 for America to be redeemed, Donald Trump must be prosecuted
 Donald Trump has been President of the United States for just shy of six months now. I
 think that most of us among the electorate knew that his presidency would be a relative
 disaster, but I am not sure how many among us expected the catastrophe our nation now
 faces.
friendly-neighborhood-patriarch:

hominishostilis:

abstractandedgyname:
siryouarebeingmocked:

mississpithy:

bogleech:

notyourmoderate:

angrybell:

thinksquad:


http://archive.is/5VvI5


Huffpo, everybody. 




Can someone tell me what high crime or misdemeanor Trump has committed that merits this? Or is the HuffPo just publishing outright fantasies?

God dammit, I’m now in the position of defending Huffington. I didn’t want to be here. Okay, @angrybell … actually, @ literally everyone who reblogged this uncritically as a tacit endorsement and agreement. Such as @the-critical-feminist that I reblog this from.My first question has to be: are you serious? Don’t read that with a tone, don’t read that as an attack. That’s my first question: Are you asking a serious question about what high crimes or misdemeanors Trump has perpetrated? Are you asking a sincere question or is this the sort of rhetoric that doesn’t translate well into text? And, if you are actually asking this question, are ou going to hear the answer or are you going to immediately start concocting your counter-argument because you just know in your heart that anyone who disagrees with you must be wrong, so you start formulating a plan to prove them wrong before you actually hear what they have to say?Next: did you read the article that was posted in the link you responded to? Because the author of that article does a reasonable job of explaining their thought process behind the headline. Or did you lash out before you read the article? Okay, presuming that you did read the article in good faith, evaluate its points, perform the follow-up research to understand context, and still disagree with the central tenets and simply believe that the author’s reasoning does not hold up for whatever reasons you have chosen not to state, and you believe their source information is falsified for whatever reason you have chosen not to state, I will move on. After I have given you and yours every conceivable benefit of the doubt and every charitable assumption. Because if the article itself doesn’t convince you, there’s the fact that Donald Trump has broken literally every federal law against corruption and conflict of interest. Not one or two, not most, not all but a few. Literally every single law we have against corruption, from the Constitution to the informal guidelines circulated as a memo from the White House ethics scholars. He’s broken literally every one of those rules. He’s openly traded favors for money and favors for months now. Hell, that Chinese influence-peddler that paid him off for sixteen million dollars should have been enough to get him convicted of treason. Sharing code-word level classified information with a government on the opposite side of an ongoing military conflict isn’t *necessarily* treason, unless the information was part of a share program with an allied nation and wasn’t his to distribute. That’s aiding a foreign aggressor at the expense of a military ally, and that’s treason. Giving aid and comfort to enemies of the nation. Obstruction of justice is pretty clear-cut, that’s an impeachment, except that the justice in question is also a matter of national security, so that’s treason. Again. Defaming the former president? Misdemeanor, impeachable. The way he drags his heels nominating posts in Justice and State could be prosecuted as dereliction of duty. If he has tapes of Comey, he’s on the hook for contempt, if he doesn’t then he’s on the hook for witness tampering. Hell, deleting the covfefe tweet is destroying federal records, which is a misdemeanor, and impeachable. The man doesn’t go a week without bringing on an impeachable offense. Strictly speaking, every time he goes to Mar-A-Lago he’s committing grand larceny by fraud, because he’s taking millions of dollars of American funds for his own benefit, after promising not to do that. There are dozens, hundreds maybe, of impeachable offenses already in this 140 days, “high crimes and misdemeanors”. Actual counts of treason, punishable by death by hanging, is probably only five or six counts. Only five or six counts of high treason by our sitting president. His job does not put him above reproach. His job is to *be* above reproach. And he’s failing that job. 

Trump’s supporters probably believe he’s done nothing impeachable or treasonous because they spent eight years claiming on no grounds whatsoever that Obama was impeachable and treasonous, just because they didn’t like him. They now probably convince themselves that these facts about Trump are as fake as their Obama theories and they’ve ruined the gravity of these terms for themselves.





“

His job does not put him above reproach. His job is to *be* above reproach. And he’s failing that job.


“






I like how Bogleech doesn’t know many Trump supporters are former Obama supporters.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/04/us/obama-trump-swing-voters.html
https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2018/10/16/17980820/trump-obama-2016-race-racism-class-economy-2018-midterm
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obama-Trump_voters
It’s not even a secret. But why am I not surprised bogleech - that intellectual titan - failed to do basic research?
And last time I checked, no nation required their politicans to be perfect. Which is what NYM is asking for with that quote; perfection. That’s what ‘above reproach’ means. An impossible standard, considering people “reproach” Trump for feeding fish wrong, for his skin color, for any and every little thing, even if they have to twist reality into a pretzel to do it. In fact, I’ve seen people take pictures of kids in cages from 2014, and blame Trump for it.

So this:


Are you asking a serious question about what high crimes or misdemeanors Trump has perpetrated?


Is a question of this:


Can someone tell me what high crime or misdemeanor Trump has committed that merits this?


Seems you missed the part that says “merits this”.


Next: did you read the article that was posted in the link you responded to? Because the author of that article does a reasonable job of explaining their thought process behind the headline. Or did you lash out before you read the article? 


(The underlined is in the subtitle, not the headline.)


Okay, presuming that you did read the article in good faith, evaluate its points, perform the follow-up research to understand context, and still disagree with the central tenets…
Context? Central tenets? Do you not know how highlighting works? You don’t need to know the context, or any other point, when you’re indicating a specific, explicit, and isolated quality.
The subtitle called for Trump’s execution, we’re 5 paragraphs in and you haven’t even acknowledged that part yet. Or at all, I’m guessing, because I’m not reading further. You keep talking around it. You accuse others, preemptively, of not hearing the answer and pre-”concocting” a response, and yet you’re waffling on about shit around the one, sole, isolated thing that was indicated in the first place.
This isn’t about ignoring context, this is about criticising one thing. Which is a thing people are allowed to do, by the way, just because people criticise one thing, doesn’t mean they’re criticising everything about the everyone involved, and everything said before, adjacent to, and after that one thing, and therefore are required to include all of those things in their consideration and assessment of this one thing.
The specific criticism of the indicated quality is the advocation of Trump’s execution. That’s it. No context is needed to understand that this is what was said, especially since that which was said, which is being criticised, is explicit. No amount of, “So, click-bait subtitle that you don’t see until you’ve already clicked on the article link out of the way, here’s what I actually meant when I said I wanted this person tried and executed,” could excuse the use of that language, let alone actually believing in it.
It’s like… it’s like if someone makes a typo, someone else is like, “Oh, seems you made a typo,” you’d jump in like, “But what about they’re perfectly reasonable spelling everywhere else? Hm? Forced to ignore contextual perfect spelling I see. They’re lack of typos everywhere else explains this typo, and vindicates it”.
You and what’s his face, James, fuckin ReasonAndEmpathy or whatever now, y’all keep saying “but what of the context?” when the criterion of criticism is isolated, atomic, specific, and/or explicit. No amount of context invalidates the very specific, singular words explicitly spoken. “Sure he called for Trump to be executed, but he explains himself.” Fucking and? When did the death sentence become ok? When did that happen? Moderates are ok with the death sentence now? Aight, weird.


Man this fucking post aged like fine wine, take a SIP 

Delicious

This was quite a ride

friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: hominishostilis: abstractandedgyname: siryouarebeingmocked: mississpithy: bogleech: notyourmoderate...

Since That: "The one who truly loves you is the one who pushes you forward on your path to Allah and gets in your way and stops you from going backwards in life." Husband Have you prayed Asr? Wife No Husband Why? Wife I got back from work tired a bit so I took me a nap. Husband Ok... Go pray Asr and Maghrib before its time for Isha. The next day... the husband leaves town on a business trip... But a few hours after his flight was scheduled to arrive he didn't call or even her like he usually does to let her know that he had arrived safely..!! The wife calls to check up on her husband but he doesn't pick up.. She calls again; the phone rings but no reply what so ever. She was starting to get worried after many attempts of calling her beloved husband and no reply at all... She thinks to herself something must have went wrong he never does that. He always calls as soon as he lands. A few hours pass by... and suddenly the phone rings and its the husband. Wife all worried says have you arrived safely?? Husband Yes, Alhamdulillah. Wife When? Husband About 4 hours ago. Wife in an angered tone 4 hours ago? And you don't call? Husband I was tired so decided to take a nap. Wife A few minutes wouldn't have hurt you if you were to call me and let me know you'v arrived... Plus haven't you heard the phone ringing over and over again as I was calling you..?? Husband Yes, I heard it.. Wife And you don't pick up..?? What are my calls not important enough for you..?? Husband You're calls are important to me, but yesterday you didn't seem to mind not answering the calls of Athan.. Allah's call... Wife with watery eyes and after a short silence says Yes, you have a point.. I'm sorry.. Husband Why are you apologizing to me? You should seek Allah's forgiveness and don't repeat the same mistake twice. All what I want out of this world is that Allah unites us both in a palace in Jannah where in it we can start our eternal life together. Ever since that day the wife never delayed any of her prayers. "The one who truly loves you is the one who pushes you forward on your path to Allah and gets in your way and stops you from going backwards in life."
Since That: "The one who truly loves you is the one who
 pushes you forward on your path to Allah
 and gets in your way and stops you from
 going backwards in life."
Husband Have you prayed Asr? Wife No Husband Why? Wife I got back from work tired a bit so I took me a nap. Husband Ok... Go pray Asr and Maghrib before its time for Isha. The next day... the husband leaves town on a business trip... But a few hours after his flight was scheduled to arrive he didn't call or even her like he usually does to let her know that he had arrived safely..!! The wife calls to check up on her husband but he doesn't pick up.. She calls again; the phone rings but no reply what so ever. She was starting to get worried after many attempts of calling her beloved husband and no reply at all... She thinks to herself something must have went wrong he never does that. He always calls as soon as he lands. A few hours pass by... and suddenly the phone rings and its the husband. Wife all worried says have you arrived safely?? Husband Yes, Alhamdulillah. Wife When? Husband About 4 hours ago. Wife in an angered tone 4 hours ago? And you don't call? Husband I was tired so decided to take a nap. Wife A few minutes wouldn't have hurt you if you were to call me and let me know you'v arrived... Plus haven't you heard the phone ringing over and over again as I was calling you..?? Husband Yes, I heard it.. Wife And you don't pick up..?? What are my calls not important enough for you..?? Husband You're calls are important to me, but yesterday you didn't seem to mind not answering the calls of Athan.. Allah's call... Wife with watery eyes and after a short silence says Yes, you have a point.. I'm sorry.. Husband Why are you apologizing to me? You should seek Allah's forgiveness and don't repeat the same mistake twice. All what I want out of this world is that Allah unites us both in a palace in Jannah where in it we can start our eternal life together. Ever since that day the wife never delayed any of her prayers. "The one who truly loves you is the one who pushes you forward on your path to Allah and gets in your way and stops you from going backwards in life."

Husband Have you prayed Asr? Wife No Husband Why? Wife I got back from work tired a bit so I took me a nap. Husband Ok... Go pray Asr and...

Since That: This user will not forgive the Salvation Army for campaigning to make homosexuality illegal AR radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-official: Oh they’re going to need salvation. Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death. This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are. Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them.  It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples. Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man. “ In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man. “ source hey since that season is coming up again!
Since That: This user will not forgive the
 Salvation Army for campaigning to
 make homosexuality illegal
 AR
radioactive-dingo:

madamehearthwitch:

auntiewanda:

unified-multiversal-theory:

socialistexan:

ginger-ale-official:
Oh they’re going to need salvation.
Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death.

This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are.

Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them. 

It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples.
Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man.
“

In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man.

“
source

hey since that season is coming up again!

radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-official: Oh they’re going...

Since That: This user will not forgive the Salvation Army for campaigning to make homosexuality illegal AR xthinks: basinke: radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-official: Oh they’re going to need salvation. Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death. This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are. Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them.  It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples. Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man. “ In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man. “ source hey since that season is coming up again! Don’t abuse the bell ringers unless they get aggressive, but don’t give them a bent penny. me: i’m gonna check wikipedia to see what they’ve done, see some sources, etc wikipedia: In November 2013 it was made known that the Salvation Army was referring LGBT individuals to one of several conversion therapy groups.[162] As a response the Salvation Army removed such referrals from their website.[163] me: …
Since That: This user will not forgive the
 Salvation Army for campaigning to
 make homosexuality illegal
 AR
xthinks:

basinke:

radioactive-dingo:

madamehearthwitch:

auntiewanda:

unified-multiversal-theory:

socialistexan:

ginger-ale-official:
Oh they’re going to need salvation.
Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death.

This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are.

Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them. 

It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples.
Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man.
“

In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man.

“
source

hey since that season is coming up again! 


Don’t abuse the bell ringers unless they get aggressive, but don’t give them a bent penny.

me: i’m gonna check wikipedia to see what they’ve done, see some sources, etc
wikipedia:
In November 2013 it was made known that the Salvation Army was referring LGBT individuals to one of several conversion therapy groups.[162] As a response the Salvation Army removed such referrals from their website.[163]
me: …

xthinks: basinke: radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-officia...

Since That: This user will not forgive the Salvation Army for campaigning to make homosexuality illegal AR basinke: radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-official: Oh they’re going to need salvation. Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death. This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are. Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them.  It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples. Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man. “ In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man. “ source hey since that season is coming up again! Don’t abuse the bell ringers unless they get aggressive, but don’t give them a bent penny.
Since That: This user will not forgive the
 Salvation Army for campaigning to
 make homosexuality illegal
 AR
basinke:

radioactive-dingo:

madamehearthwitch:

auntiewanda:

unified-multiversal-theory:

socialistexan:

ginger-ale-official:
Oh they’re going to need salvation.
Not just making it illegal, but making being gay punishable with death.

This is one of the many reasons why I walk by every single red bucket in the run-up to Christmas. They’re not getting my money, I don’t care how nice the people ringing bells are.

Ever since the time they threatened to close all their soup kitchens in NYC if a law that did something as simple as allow companies to extend spousal benefits to their employee’s same-sex domestic partners I have refused to buy from them or donate to them. 

It’s that time of year again! In case people don’t know… the Salvation Army is shitty peoples.
Also, the married women are not paid (and therefore can’t qualify for assistance if they should ever divorce, etc). And worth “of course” less than a man.
“

In the Army’s case, the agreement for compensation is that the officer allowance be paid jointly to the husband—the check is written in his name. Officially, the wife is a “worker without expectation of remuneration,” and her husband receives 40 percent more of an allowance as a married man than he would as a single man.

“
source

hey since that season is coming up again! 


Don’t abuse the bell ringers unless they get aggressive, but don’t give them a bent penny.

basinke: radioactive-dingo: madamehearthwitch: auntiewanda: unified-multiversal-theory: socialistexan: ginger-ale-official: Oh they...

Since That: <p>Since that person in my asks reminded me of the grief moo 😂</p>
Since That: <p>Since that person in my asks reminded me of the grief moo 😂</p>

<p>Since that person in my asks reminded me of the grief moo 😂</p>

Since That: A Los Angeles Times Times latimes Puerto Rico is closing 184 public schools amid the territory's economic crisis lat.ms/2q7Kfwr 5/6/17, 9:40 AM SinglePayer @puzzleshifter That's a funny way to spell, "Puerto Rico forced to close 184 public schools so US hedge fund owning politicians can cash in their stocks" The Associated Press Φ @AP Puerto Rico to close 184 public schools in move expected to save millions of dollars amid a deep economic crisis. apne.ws/ 2qljnA8 5/5/17, 10:26 AM mikkeneko: wadafuqreally: airyairyquitecontrary: spoopysalt: whisperoceans: this is fantastic now children in Puerto Rico wont be able to receive the education they deserve thanks to their messed up government Its even worse than that. I’m living through it. Not only are schools closing, hospitals are collapsing. Only around 9% of the island has electricity and it comes and goes at times. People are dying in hospitals because of lack of diesel for the generators, a lot of the water is now infected, there are disease outbreaks and scareceness of food. I am safe, but many are not. Some have water, others don’t. We need help. Sending money would be helpful but what would help even more would be sending water filters, filtering water bottles, food, medicine, if somehow possible diesel. All of you reblogging this news helps, but what we need is physical help. If you can’t, then spread the word, but God if you can send supplies… Please… PLEASE do. We are dying. Help us, help us save ourselves. Help us save our people. Help us save out ISLAND. If you’re not in a position to ship or transport useful items to the island (which is sure as heck the case for me in New Zealand) then the best thing you can do is give money to a reputable relief organisation operating in the area. Hispanic Federation UNIDOS fundraising page for Puerto Rico. Choose the fundraiser you want from the dropdown menu in the “Your Information” section (as you can see from the picture they have several). Save the Children’s Hurricane Maria fundraising page. Reblogging You know, every time Puerto Rico comes up I’m reminded of a comment my dad made in a discussion about it, in response to someone claiming that the PR situation is terrible but oh well, what can we do? They’re SO far away after all and the logistic problems are SO hard. He said, “When the Soviets blockaded the city of Berlin in 1948, America flew in to West Berlin enough supplies to keep the city going by airdrop for over a year. Puerto Rico today isn’t much bigger than Berlin was then, and America has grown immensely in wealth and power since that day. The problem isn’t lack of resources, it’s lack of will.” Nothing about what’s happening to Puerto Rico (and still happening) is inevitable in any way. This is deliberate. Don’t forget it.
Since That: A Los Angeles Times
 Times latimes
 Puerto Rico is closing 184 public
 schools amid the territory's economic
 crisis lat.ms/2q7Kfwr
 5/6/17, 9:40 AM

 SinglePayer
 @puzzleshifter
 That's a funny way to spell, "Puerto Rico
 forced to close 184 public schools so
 US hedge fund owning politicians can
 cash in their stocks"
 The Associated Press Φ @AP
 Puerto Rico to close 184 public schools in
 move expected to save millions of dollars
 amid a deep economic crisis. apne.ws/
 2qljnA8
 5/5/17, 10:26 AM
mikkeneko:
wadafuqreally:

airyairyquitecontrary:

spoopysalt:

whisperoceans:
this is fantastic now children in Puerto Rico wont be able to receive the education they deserve thanks to their messed up government

Its even worse than that. I’m living through it. Not only are schools closing, hospitals are collapsing. Only around 9% of the island has electricity and it comes and goes at times. 
People are dying in hospitals because of lack of diesel for the generators, a lot of the water is now infected, there are disease outbreaks and scareceness of food. I am safe, but many are not. 
Some have water, others don’t. We need help. Sending money would be helpful but what would help even more would be sending water filters, filtering water bottles, food, medicine, if somehow possible diesel.

All of you reblogging this news helps, but what we need is physical help. If you can’t, then spread the word, but God if you can send supplies… Please… PLEASE do. We are dying. Help us, help us save ourselves. Help us save our people. Help us save out ISLAND.

If you’re not in a position to ship or transport useful items to the island (which is sure as heck the case for me in New Zealand) then the best thing you can do is give money to a reputable relief organisation operating in the area.
Hispanic Federation UNIDOS fundraising page for Puerto Rico.
Choose the fundraiser you want from the dropdown menu in the “Your Information” section (as you can see from the picture they have several).
Save the Children’s Hurricane Maria fundraising page.


Reblogging

You know, every time Puerto Rico comes up I’m reminded of a comment my dad made in a discussion about it, in response to someone claiming that the PR situation is terrible but oh well, what can we do? They’re SO far away after all and the logistic problems are SO hard.
He said, “When the Soviets blockaded the city of Berlin in 1948, America flew in to West Berlin enough supplies to keep the city going by airdrop for over a year. Puerto Rico today isn’t much bigger than Berlin was then, and America has grown immensely in wealth and power since that day. The problem isn’t lack of resources, it’s lack of will.”
Nothing about what’s happening to Puerto Rico (and still happening) is inevitable in any way. This is deliberate. Don’t forget it.

mikkeneko: wadafuqreally: airyairyquitecontrary: spoopysalt: whisperoceans: this is fantastic now children in Puerto Rico wont be able...

Since That: Dear Guy Who Just Made My ntruding Have you ever been to earth? On earth, we use the word "burrito" to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I'm surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain: Let me further explain: Burritos are eaten from one end to the other So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredient:s going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito's end user. Whern you make a burrito, you should put the ingredi- ents in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY When you eat a burrito, you don't stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can't usually dislocate their jaws, and I'm not a fucking pelican. But you must think that's how it's done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like And guess what else, player? You probably can't guess anything, because I'm pretty sure you're just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here's what: Humans also don't eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that, Because at least THEN would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I'LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR Nope My experience was more like HEY BEANS ITS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND IFOR A MINUTE UNTILI CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I'M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT'S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET You built this thing like a fucking pack of And don't even fucking think I'm about to open this shit up and re engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. IALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THATS HOWI DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOK ING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT'S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE What's that? should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DONT WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON'T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR You're the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys. UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK IDIDN'T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEWW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER That's like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER'S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOUA WRENCH, SO BE COOL Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They're caⅡed fucking A fork. My god.I haven't cried sinceI was six, now People eat burritos with forks? God is sorry he made us. The absolute worst way to make a burrito
Since That: Dear Guy Who Just Made My
 ntruding
 Have you ever been to earth?
 On earth, we use the word "burrito" to describe
 a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty
 simple stuff, and I'm surprised you at least
 got that part right. My burrito was, in fact
 filled with food. In this, you and I agree and
 are friends. But this is also where my lifelong
 hatred begins for you and anyone else whose
 brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the
 same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as
 yours has. Because that should have killed
 you, but left you around long enough to do
 what you did to me today. Let me explain:
 Let me further explain:
 Burritos are eaten from one end to the other
 So that means when you assemble a burrito
 with motherfucking ZONES of ingredient:s
 going that direction, you create a disgusting
 experience for the burrito's end user. Whern
 you make a burrito, you should put the ingredi-
 ents in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite
 has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting
 at least two types of ingredients, and there is
 trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
 Have you ever eaten one of the things you
 make all fucking day? You should try one
 They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT
 WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING
 EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP
 IN LETTUCE COUNTRY
 When you eat a burrito, you don't stand it up
 and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking
 Rancor. Humans can't usually dislocate their
 jaws, and I'm not a fucking pelican. But you
 must think that's how it's done, since that
 would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a
 bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like
 And guess what else, player? You probably
 can't guess anything, because I'm pretty sure
 you're just a mop with a hat on it that fell over
 and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in
 case, here's what:
 Humans also don't eat burritos like fucking
 corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter
 from one end to the other a little at a time and
 then DING next line. But today I wish I had
 tried that, Because at least THEN would be
 able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all
 like HEY BEANS I'LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST
 GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR
 Nope
 My experience was more like HEY BEANS
 ITS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND IFOR A
 MINUTE UNTILI CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE
 THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY
 THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH
 HEY I WAS WRONG I'M IN THE FUCKING
 CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT
 I HOPE IT'S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA
 POCKET
 You built this thing like a fucking pack of
 And don't even fucking think I'm about to open
 this shit up and re engineer your nonsense 90
 degrees. IALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH
 MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THATS HOWI
 DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOK
 ING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO
 FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS
 SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP
 WITH A BURRITO THAT'S BEEN SHOT IN THE
 GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE
 What's that? should ask you to mix it up first
 next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DONT
 WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO
 THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON'T
 WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR
 You're the worst thing that has ever happened
 to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere
 an apology for this burritobomination, and I
 hope your babies look like monkeys.
 UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID JUST
 EAT IT WITH A FORK
 IDIDN'T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO
 SALAD
 If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork,
 THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEWW
 BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION
 TEN SECONDS LATER
 That's like buying a car and having them hand
 you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like
 YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER'S
 GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD
 ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU
 HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOUA
 WRENCH, SO BE COOL
 Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One
 at the end of each arm. They're caⅡed fucking
 A fork. My god.I haven't cried sinceI was six,
 now
 People eat burritos with forks?
 God is sorry he made us.
The absolute worst way to make a burrito

The absolute worst way to make a burrito

Since That: CT Dear Guy Who Just Made On Earth, we use the word "burrito" to de- scribe a tortilla filled with things you eat Pretty simple stuff, and I'm surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been re- of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Be- cause that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers length- wise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of geting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. When you eat a burrito, you don't stand it up and bite down on it lengthnwise bke a fucking Rancor. Humans can't usually dis- ocate their jaws, and I'm not a facking pelican. But you must think that's how it's done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crap- strosity and have it taste like a burrito And guess what else, player? You probably can't guess aroything, because I'm pretty sure you're just a mop with a bat on it that tilla, but just in case, here's what: Humans also dont eat burritos like fuck ing corn on the cob. Lake a fucking type writer from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish 1 had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SEC My experience was more like HEY BEANS ITS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND ME FOR A FEW MINUTES UNTIL CAN NEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS NEXT I HOPE ITS NOT ANOTHER FUCK You built this thing like a fucking pack of And don't even fucking think Im abour to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense go degrees.I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS I AM NOT, GOING TO DO FUCKING TOR- TILIA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITHA BURRITO THATS BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEFDING YOUR INEPTI Whar's that?I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? DONT WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING AND I DONT WANT A PILE OF BURRITO You're the worst thing that has ever hap- pened to the universe, you owe everyone bomination, and I hope your babies look Did you lake this post? Imade something dse I DIDNT ORDER THE FUCKING COBBUR BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY That's like buying a car and hand you a fucking wrench with the keys FUCKER'S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They're called A fork. My god. I haven't cried since I was We can all stand behind this dude’s angry burrito rant
Since That: CT
 Dear Guy Who Just Made
 On Earth, we use the word "burrito" to de-
 scribe a tortilla filled with things you eat
 Pretty simple stuff, and I'm surprised you
 at least got that part right. My burrito was,
 in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I
 agree and are friends. But this is also
 where my lifelong hatred begins for you
 and anyone else whose brain has been re-
 of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Be-
 cause that should have killed you, but left
 you around long enough to do what you
 Burritos are eaten from one end to the
 other. So that means when you assemble a
 end user. When you make a burrito, you
 should put the ingredients in layers length-
 wise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A
 FUCKING CHANCE of geting at least two
 types of ingredients, and there is little
 Have you ever eaten one of the things you
 make all fucking day? You should try one.
 They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE
 ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
 When you eat a burrito, you don't stand it
 up and bite down on it lengthnwise bke a
 fucking Rancor. Humans can't usually dis-
 ocate their jaws, and I'm not a facking
 pelican. But you must think that's how it's
 done, since that would be THE ONLY
 FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crap-
 strosity and have it taste like a burrito
 And guess what else, player? You probably
 can't guess aroything, because I'm pretty
 sure you're just a mop with a bat on it that
 tilla, but just in case, here's what:
 Humans also dont eat burritos like fuck
 ing corn on the cob. Lake a fucking type
 writer from one end to the other a little at
 a time and then DING next line. But today
 I wish 1 had tried that. Because at least
 THEN I would be able to eat some rice,
 then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS
 LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER
 HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SEC
 My experience was more like HEY BEANS
 ITS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND ME
 FOR A FEW MINUTES UNTIL CAN
 NEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE
 A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS
 NEXT I HOPE ITS NOT ANOTHER FUCK
 You built this thing like a fucking pack of
 And don't even fucking think Im abour to
 open this shit up and re-engineer your
 nonsense go degrees.I ALREADY PUT A
 HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH
 FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS
 I AM NOT, GOING TO DO FUCKING TOR-
 TILIA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK
 TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITHA
 BURRITO THATS BEEN SHOT IN THE
 GUT AND IS BLEFDING YOUR INEPTI
 Whar's that?I should ask you to mix it up
 first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE?
 DONT WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING
 AND I DONT WANT A PILE OF BURRITO
 You're the worst thing that has ever hap-
 pened to the universe, you owe everyone
 bomination, and I hope your babies look
 Did you lake this post? Imade something dse
 I DIDNT ORDER THE FUCKING COBBUR
 BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY
 That's like buying a car and
 hand you a fucking wrench with the keys
 FUCKER'S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE
 SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON
 AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE
 GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL
 Jesus already gave me two burrito forks.
 One at the end of each arm. They're called
 A fork. My god. I haven't cried since I was
We can all stand behind this dude’s angry burrito rant

We can all stand behind this dude’s angry burrito rant

Since That: SKILL HARD WORK TO ACHIEVE A LEVEL OF SKILL IN ANYTHING YOU HAVE TO STAND ON A PILLAR OF HARD WORK. OH, I JUST STARTED HERE TALENT & I HARD WORK TALENTHARD WORK owLTURD.com violent-darts: charlesoberonn: jelloapocalypse: These bother me sometimes. We all start as literal useless babies. No one gets a magic ticket that makes them better at anything. If someone says they “never practice” it’s probably because they like doing the skill and see it as a fun use of their time instead of “practice”. I will qualify this a small but I think important amount, because what it is is actually complicated:  Some people’s brains and nervous systems are wired for better hand-eye coordination. Some people’s brains and nervous systems are wired for better pattern recognition. Or translations of audio input. Or whatever.  What this does is combine with @jelloapocalypse‘s EXTREMELY WELL-OBSERVED COMMENT (If someone says they “never practice” it’s probably because they like doing the skill and see it as a fun use of their time instead of “practice”.) in a way that can be both invisible and give this kind of person a massive leg up while being really discouraging to someone who doesn’t have that wiring.  It doesn’t get to the actual original comic’s level of “oh I just started here”. But let’s take two people called Riley and Kennedy, and we’ll do singing, since that’s what I teach.  Riley and Kennedy have exactly the same kind of background: parents who listen to the radio sometimes, the usual social stuff around popular music of whatever genre, etc, but no formal training. Neither of them sings in a church choir, neither of them falls into a formal disability category, whatever.  The first time Riley shows up in my studio and we sing a really simple song I use as a diagnostic, she gets it mostly right. She can follow the tune; she can hear pitch, and it takes very little work for her to chivvy her voice into matching that pitch as long as there’s not something pulling her off. (In other words: as long as I’m singing the same notes as her and playing them on the piano, and as long a she can hear both herself and those notes).  For Riley the lesson is really fun and validating and she goes home and sings along to her own music for a while and comes back next week with six songs she wants to try learning. And most of her lessons are like that: pretty easy positive feedback. That means Riley “practices” a lot in exactly the way @jelloapocalypse describes, even if she doesn’t think she’s actually practicing (that is, sitting down to sing the songs we’re working on together in a systematic way) at all.  In contrast, the first time Kennedy comes to my studio, she struggles. It’s harder for her to hear the difference between notes, and it’s much harder for her to make her voice actually match the pitch she wants to sing at. When we pull out the diagnostic tune, she mostly manages to drone a few clusters of semi-tones, and while she can hear that she’s Off, it’s actually very hard for her to tell HOW she’s off, or what she should do to correct it.  In most cases, for Kennedy, lessons - and in fact the overall experience of singing - is not fun. It’s not validating. It’s a whole process of Not Being Good, of Doing Things Wrong, and given the way humans are often in casual situations being laughed at. When Kennedy goes home she doesn’t sing along with any music she plays: she keeps her lips pressed together and at best enjoys other people singing (and maybe feels envious and demeaned because she can’t do it).  Now the thing is, the practical “skill” difference for Riley and Kennedy here at the beginning is minimal. But the Rileys will tend (if they like what they’re doing) to ROCKET UP THE SKILL LEVEL, because of the “practice is fun so it’s just the thing I do” - because there is always a bunch of validation and positive reinforcement in the act of doing whatever it is, be it doodling or singing or math.  The Kennedys won’t. In fact if they’re not lucky enough to have a good teacher, and one who can put a lot of this into perspective for them, they will tend to be inhibited. The worst time is when a Riley and a Kennedy are friends and sign up to learn together, and Riley takes off and Kennedy’s left sitting there feeling like she’s somehow Deeply Flawed.   And in fact the whole Doctrine of “It’s Just About How Hard You Work” will in and of itself become part of what inhibits them, because they will watch the Rileys - and even the Annas, Anna in this metaphor being the Totally Normal Student who never really exists - grasp things faster than they do, even if they ARE working hard. And this will HAPPEN. They will watch this reality happen in front of them … and then people say to them “oh, it’s all about how hard you work, dear.” And it’s like being gaslit. (Well, to be fair: it IS being gaslit, just without malice intended on the part of the people doing it.)  And that message is horribly horribly toxic: here Kennedy is, and she IS working hard, but she’s still not progressing as fast as Riley or Anna no matter what she does! But it’s All About Hard Work, right? So that must mean that no matter how hard she THINKS she’s working, she’s actually just lazy, or doesn’t want it enough. It’s clearly a moral flaw in her.  I actually have, personally, really good luck with teaching the Kennedys because I literally have this conversation with them when they come to my studio. I actually outright tell them: firstly, anyone who has working vocal chords can sing. Anyone who has working vocal chords and the ability to distinguish audio pitch can even sing on key in tune! But some people have an easy time learning this and some people have a hard time, and sometimes which it is has some relationship to, say, “early exposure to music” or whatever but sometimes it seems to be utterly fucking random - pure luck of the draw.  You CAN SING. The capability is there. And if you want to we will find out how to make it happen. It might not happen as fast as for some other person, it might take more work, it might take more care, but that’s okay: that’s not your fault, that doesn’t mean you’re NOT working hard, but it does mean that here at the beginning we do things like recalibrate victories, we make your progress about YOU, not about Riley or Anna.  But I’m also not going to gaslight you or make you feel like you’re either delusional or somehow especially So Terrible You Don’t Fit In The Rest Of The World: sure, I’ve got some Riley-types who walk in here, noodle around, and we go on to Art Songs. They exist.  So what? Tall people exist. People with broad shoulders exist. People with dark hair exist. Physical embodiment and neurology hand out luck of the genetic roulette with no interest in outcomes. If you’re born blonde, it’s always going to take more work for you to have brown hair than someone born with brown hair, but much like dyeing your hair to match what you want, we can train the muscles of your voice and the neural pathways for hearing to do what you want.  The differences between Rileys and Kennedys are very small. If Riley didn’t discover she liked singing and Kennedy worked at it for years then no, Riley would not “start out” as good as Kennedy is after those years. And you can be Riley and if you DON’T do the fucking work, the Annas of the world especially will blast past you and leave you in the dust.  But on the other hand the Rileys get this wonderful cycle of positive reinforcement that does often start from a place of their coincidental physical embodiment giving them a slight leg up. And pretending that’s not the case does a big disservice to the Kennedys.  We just absolutely do need to reframe that for what it is (a tiny fundamental difference and then a HELL OF A LOT OF “this is fun so I practice more so I get more validation so I -” and more or less no moral meaning at all), what it doesn’t mean, and how to compensate for it. 
Since That: SKILL
 HARD
 WORK
 TO ACHIEVE A LEVEL
 OF SKILL IN ANYTHING
 YOU HAVE TO STAND ON
 A PILLAR OF HARD WORK.
 OH, I JUST
 STARTED
 HERE
 TALENT & I HARD
 WORK
 TALENTHARD
 WORK
 owLTURD.com
violent-darts:

charlesoberonn:

jelloapocalypse:

These bother me sometimes.
We all start as literal useless babies. No one gets a magic ticket that makes them better at anything. If someone says they “never practice” it’s probably because they like doing the skill and see it as a fun use of their time instead of “practice”.


I will qualify this a small but I think important amount, because what it is is actually complicated: 
Some people’s brains and nervous systems are wired for better hand-eye coordination. Some people’s brains and nervous systems are wired for better pattern recognition. Or translations of audio input. Or whatever. 
What this does is combine with @jelloapocalypse‘s EXTREMELY WELL-OBSERVED COMMENT (If someone says they “never practice” it’s probably because they like doing the skill and see it as a fun use of their time instead of “practice”.) in a way that can be both invisible and give this kind of person a massive leg up while being really discouraging to someone who doesn’t have that wiring. 
It doesn’t get to the actual original comic’s level of “oh I just started here”. But let’s take two people called Riley and Kennedy, and we’ll do singing, since that’s what I teach. 
Riley and Kennedy have exactly the same kind of background: parents who listen to the radio sometimes, the usual social stuff around popular music of whatever genre, etc, but no formal training. Neither of them sings in a church choir, neither of them falls into a formal disability category, whatever. 
The first time Riley shows up in my studio and we sing a really simple song I use as a diagnostic, she gets it mostly right. She can follow the tune; she can hear pitch, and it takes very little work for her to chivvy her voice into matching that pitch as long as there’s not something pulling her off. (In other words: as long as I’m singing the same notes as her and playing them on the piano, and as long a she can hear both herself and those notes). 
For Riley the lesson is really fun and validating and she goes home and sings along to her own music for a while and comes back next week with six songs she wants to try learning. And most of her lessons are like that: pretty easy positive feedback. That means Riley “practices” a lot in exactly the way @jelloapocalypse describes, even if she doesn’t think she’s actually practicing (that is, sitting down to sing the songs we’re working on together in a systematic way) at all. 
In contrast, the first time Kennedy comes to my studio, she struggles. It’s harder for her to hear the difference between notes, and it’s much harder for her to make her voice actually match the pitch she wants to sing at. When we pull out the diagnostic tune, she mostly manages to drone a few clusters of semi-tones, and while she can hear that she’s Off, it’s actually very hard for her to tell HOW she’s off, or what she should do to correct it. 
In most cases, for Kennedy, lessons - and in fact the overall experience of singing - is not fun. It’s not validating. It’s a whole process of Not Being Good, of Doing Things Wrong, and given the way humans are often in casual situations being laughed at. When Kennedy goes home she doesn’t sing along with any music she plays: she keeps her lips pressed together and at best enjoys other people singing (and maybe feels envious and demeaned because she can’t do it). 
Now the thing is, the practical “skill” difference for Riley and Kennedy here at the beginning is minimal. But the Rileys will tend (if they like what they’re doing) to ROCKET UP THE SKILL LEVEL, because of the “practice is fun so it’s just the thing I do” - because there is always a bunch of validation and positive reinforcement in the act of doing whatever it is, be it doodling or singing or math. 
The Kennedys won’t. In fact if they’re not lucky enough to have a good teacher, and one who can put a lot of this into perspective for them, they will tend to be inhibited. The worst time is when a Riley and a Kennedy are friends and sign up to learn together, and Riley takes off and Kennedy’s left sitting there feeling like she’s somehow Deeply Flawed. 
 And in fact the whole Doctrine of “It’s Just About How Hard You Work” will in and of itself become part of what inhibits them, because they will watch the Rileys - and even the Annas, Anna in this metaphor being the Totally Normal Student who never really exists - grasp things faster than they do, even if they ARE working hard. And this will HAPPEN. They will watch this reality happen in front of them … and then people say to them “oh, it’s all about how hard you work, dear.” And it’s like being gaslit. (Well, to be fair: it IS being gaslit, just without malice intended on the part of the people doing it.) 
And that message is horribly horribly toxic: here Kennedy is, and she IS working hard, but she’s still not progressing as fast as Riley or Anna no matter what she does! But it’s All About Hard Work, right? So that must mean that no matter how hard she THINKS she’s working, she’s actually just lazy, or doesn’t want it enough. It’s clearly a moral flaw in her. 
I actually have, personally, really good luck with teaching the Kennedys because I literally have this conversation with them when they come to my studio. I actually outright tell them: firstly, anyone who has working vocal chords can sing. Anyone who has working vocal chords and the ability to distinguish audio pitch can even sing on key in tune! But some people have an easy time learning this and some people have a hard time, and sometimes which it is has some relationship to, say, “early exposure to music” or whatever but sometimes it seems to be utterly fucking random - pure luck of the draw. 
You CAN SING. The capability is there. And if you want to we will find out how to make it happen. It might not happen as fast as for some other person, it might take more work, it might take more care, but that’s okay: that’s not your fault, that doesn’t mean you’re NOT working hard, but it does mean that here at the beginning we do things like recalibrate victories, we make your progress about YOU, not about Riley or Anna. 
But I’m also not going to gaslight you or make you feel like you’re either delusional or somehow especially So Terrible You Don’t Fit In The Rest Of The World: sure, I’ve got some Riley-types who walk in here, noodle around, and we go on to Art Songs. They exist. 
So what? Tall people exist. People with broad shoulders exist. People with dark hair exist. Physical embodiment and neurology hand out luck of the genetic roulette with no interest in outcomes. If you’re born blonde, it’s always going to take more work for you to have brown hair than someone born with brown hair, but much like dyeing your hair to match what you want, we can train the muscles of your voice and the neural pathways for hearing to do what you want. 
The differences between Rileys and Kennedys are very small. If Riley didn’t discover she liked singing and Kennedy worked at it for years then no, Riley would not “start out” as good as Kennedy is after those years. And you can be Riley and if you DON’T do the fucking work, the Annas of the world especially will blast past you and leave you in the dust. 
But on the other hand the Rileys get this wonderful cycle of positive reinforcement that does often start from a place of their coincidental physical embodiment giving them a slight leg up. And pretending that’s not the case does a big disservice to the Kennedys. 
We just absolutely do need to reframe that for what it is (a tiny fundamental difference and then a HELL OF A LOT OF “this is fun so I practice more so I get more validation so I -” and more or less no moral meaning at all), what it doesn’t mean, and how to compensate for it. 

violent-darts: charlesoberonn: jelloapocalypse: These bother me sometimes. We all start as literal useless babies. No one gets a magic...

Since That: BEANS MOLE J MEAT CHBESE RKE CILAVIZO SALsA Dear Guy Who Just Made My Burrito: Lucky Shirt in Comedy Corner abookandacoffee: its-rowark: misanthrobot: rowan-oak-o-flow: delgt: xopachi: skwinky: lntruding: Have you ever been to earth? On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain: You’re an idiot. Let me further explain: Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito. And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what: Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND. Nope. My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET. You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers. And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE. What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN. I just want a burrito. In conclusion: You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys. UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”: A fucking fork? I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD. If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER. That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL. Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS. A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now. People eat burritos with forks? God is sorry he made us. (Source) I always need this on my blog. I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning.  Yes @kirkfuffle MY FAVORITE FUCKING POST IS BACK. Finally! I wanted to show this to my brother and I’ve been waiting over a year for it to come back! A fucking pack of lifesavers
Since That: BEANS
 MOLE J MEAT
 CHBESE
 RKE
 CILAVIZO SALsA
 Dear Guy Who Just Made My
 Burrito:
 Lucky Shirt in Comedy Corner
abookandacoffee:
its-rowark:

misanthrobot:

rowan-oak-o-flow:

delgt:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:


Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.



UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)


I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

Yes

@kirkfuffle

MY FAVORITE FUCKING POST IS BACK.


Finally! I wanted to show this to my brother and I’ve been waiting over a year for it to come back!


A fucking pack of lifesavers

abookandacoffee: its-rowark: misanthrobot: rowan-oak-o-flow: delgt: xopachi: skwinky: lntruding: Have you ever been to earth? On...

Since That: oo US. Cellular - 10:38 AM 0 100% acutelesbian A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover's once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes fat-thin-skinny this fucks me up every single time acutelesbian I never expected this to be my most popular poem out of the hundreds I've written. I was extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I o0 U.S. Cellular I never expected this to be my most popular poem out of the hundreds I've written. I was extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I left out the most beautiful part of that class 10:38 AM 100% After my teacher introduced us to this theory she asked us, "is love a feeling? Or is it a choice?" We were all a bunch of teenagers. urally we said it was a feeling. She said that if we clung to that belief, we'd never have a lasting relationship of any sort. She made us interview a dozen adults who were or had been married and we asked them about their marriages and why it lasted or why it failed At the end, I asked every single person if love was an emotion or a choice Everybody said that it was a choice. It was a conscious commitment. It was something you choose to make work every day with a person who has chosen the same thing. They all said that at one point in their marriage, the "feeling of love" had vanished or faded and they weren't happy. They said feelings are always changing and you cannot build something that will last on such a shaky foundation. The married ones said that when things were bad, they chose to open the communication, chose to identify what broke and how to fix it, eeeoo U.S. Cellular 10:38 AM 100% bad, they chose to open the communication, chose to identify what broke and how to fix it, and chose to recreate something worth falling in love with The divorced ones said they chose to walk away Ever since that class, since that project, I never looked at relationships the same way. I understood why arranged marriages were successful. I discovered the difference in feelings and commitments. I've never gone for the person who makes my heart flutter or my head spin. I've chosen the people who were committed to choosing me, dedicated to finding something to adore even on the ugliest days I no longer fear the day someone who swore I was their universe can no longer see the stars in my eyes as long as they still choose to look until they find them again. fr3ight-train This is so fucking important and I think it's something I needed right novw Since you've been gone Source: acutelesbian 1,226,982 notes Is Love a Feeling or a Choice?
Since That: oo US. Cellular -
 10:38 AM
 0 100%
 acutelesbian
 A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is,
 or what scares me most. And I know they expect
 an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or
 people dressed like animals, but how do I tell
 them that when I was 17 I took a class called
 Relationships For Life and I learned that most
 people fall out of love for the same reasons they
 fell in it. That their lover's once endearing
 stubbornness has now become refusal to
 compromise and their one track mind is now
 immaturity and their bad habits that you once
 adored is now money down the drain. Their
 spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible
 and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy,
 just another distraction in your busy life
 Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought
 that I can become ugly to someone who once
 thought all the stars were in my eyes
 fat-thin-skinny
 this fucks me up every single time
 acutelesbian
 I never expected this to be my most popular
 poem out of the hundreds I've written. I was
 extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I
 o0 U.S. Cellular
 I never expected this to be my most popular
 poem out of the hundreds I've written. I was
 extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I
 left out the most beautiful part of that class
 10:38 AM
 100%
 After my teacher introduced us to this theory
 she asked us, "is love a feeling? Or is it a
 choice?" We were all a bunch of teenagers.
 urally we said it was a feeling. She said that if
 we clung to that belief, we'd never have a lasting
 relationship of any sort.
 She made us interview a dozen adults who were
 or had been married and we asked them about
 their marriages and why it lasted or why it failed
 At the end, I asked every single person if love
 was an emotion or a choice
 Everybody said that it was a choice. It was a
 conscious commitment. It was something you
 choose to make work every day with a person
 who has chosen the same thing. They all said
 that at one point in their marriage, the "feeling of
 love" had vanished or faded and they weren't
 happy. They said feelings are always changing
 and you cannot build something that will last on
 such a shaky foundation.
 The married ones said that when things were
 bad, they chose to open the communication,
 chose to identify what broke and how to fix it,
 eeeoo U.S. Cellular
 10:38 AM
 100%
 bad, they chose to open the communication,
 chose to identify what broke and how to fix it,
 and chose to recreate something worth falling in
 love with
 The divorced ones said they chose to walk away
 Ever since that class, since that project, I never
 looked at relationships the same way. I
 understood why arranged marriages were
 successful. I discovered the difference in
 feelings and commitments. I've never gone for
 the person who makes my heart flutter or my
 head spin. I've chosen the people who were
 committed to choosing me, dedicated to finding
 something to adore even on the ugliest days
 I no longer fear the day someone who swore I
 was their universe can no longer see the stars in
 my eyes as long as they still choose to look until
 they find them again.
 fr3ight-train
 This is so fucking important and I think it's
 something I needed right novw
 Since you've been gone Source: acutelesbian
 1,226,982 notes
Is Love a Feeling or a Choice?

Is Love a Feeling or a Choice?

Since That: Savannah James Shares The Inside Scoop About LeBron James: "He ls Truly A King To His Queen" @balleralert LYO Read More: www.balleralert.com Savannah James Shares The Inside Scoop About LeBron James: “He Is Truly A King To His Queen” - blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ In public, LeBron James is the best basketball player on the planet and arguably the biggest athlete of our generation, but in private James’ role as King fits perfectly with the dynamic of his household, so says his wife. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “He is truly a king to his queen, if you will,” LeBron’s wife, Savannah James told the Cleveland Magazine. “He treats me with so much respect – I mean, it’s hard not to love him, with the way that he is with me and the kids and his mom and just everyone who’s around him. He’s a really, really humble guy for everything that he has and everything that he has done.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ James sat down with her hometown magazine to open up about their love and how they live a normal life outside of LeBron’s celebrity. The couple met in high school and at first, James had little interest in the superstar. At that time, LeBron was already one of, if not the best player in the area, who went on to grace the cover of magazines, be featured on Sportscenter and be drafted in the first round, straight out of high school. But it took a mutual friend’s encouragement for her to actually pursue him. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’m like, ‘Um, nope. I’ll take his number [then] one day I’m sitting around – I was probably bored or something – and I’m like, ‘Oh, I forgot! I have this number for this guy that I can call. He seemed interested, so let’s see.’” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Since that moment, the two have been inseparable. LeBron proposed in 2011, and the two jumped the broom in 2013. They have three beautiful children, one, who is already a force to be reckoned with on the court. But together, the two raise their children to be kings and queen of the next generation. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “They’re not rewarded for mediocrity. I......to read the rest log on to BallerAlert.com (clickable link on profile)
Since That: Savannah James Shares The Inside Scoop
 About LeBron James: "He ls Truly A King To His
 Queen"
 @balleralert
 LYO
 Read More: www.balleralert.com
Savannah James Shares The Inside Scoop About LeBron James: “He Is Truly A King To His Queen” - blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ In public, LeBron James is the best basketball player on the planet and arguably the biggest athlete of our generation, but in private James’ role as King fits perfectly with the dynamic of his household, so says his wife. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “He is truly a king to his queen, if you will,” LeBron’s wife, Savannah James told the Cleveland Magazine. “He treats me with so much respect – I mean, it’s hard not to love him, with the way that he is with me and the kids and his mom and just everyone who’s around him. He’s a really, really humble guy for everything that he has and everything that he has done.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ James sat down with her hometown magazine to open up about their love and how they live a normal life outside of LeBron’s celebrity. The couple met in high school and at first, James had little interest in the superstar. At that time, LeBron was already one of, if not the best player in the area, who went on to grace the cover of magazines, be featured on Sportscenter and be drafted in the first round, straight out of high school. But it took a mutual friend’s encouragement for her to actually pursue him. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’m like, ‘Um, nope. I’ll take his number [then] one day I’m sitting around – I was probably bored or something – and I’m like, ‘Oh, I forgot! I have this number for this guy that I can call. He seemed interested, so let’s see.’” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Since that moment, the two have been inseparable. LeBron proposed in 2011, and the two jumped the broom in 2013. They have three beautiful children, one, who is already a force to be reckoned with on the court. But together, the two raise their children to be kings and queen of the next generation. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “They’re not rewarded for mediocrity. I......to read the rest log on to BallerAlert.com (clickable link on profile)

Savannah James Shares The Inside Scoop About LeBron James: “He Is Truly A King To His Queen” - blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ In pu...

Since That: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BDSM AND ABUSE ABUSE BDSM COMMUNICATION ABUSE GUILT SETUP DEBRIEF AGREEMENT PLANNING EXCUSES AFTERCARESCENE/PLAY HONEYMOON BDSM Domestic Cycle Domestic Abuse Cycle Communication Both partners still downAbuse A physical or verbal form of violence and talk about what they would both like out is committed against another persor of the scene. They discuss things that are off limits and safety measures that need to be put in place to ensure both people are safe Agreement - Both partners agree to what isGuilt - The abuser becomes worried about on and off limits for the scene play/training scene - This is the time when being caught and the potential consequences partners can take part in the scene they both discussed and agreed upon Scene/Play This is the time when both partners participate in the activities that were excuses and rationalize in any way they can previously discussed and agreed uporn Aftercare - After an intense scene, both partners can be physically, mentally and emotionally drained. Cuddling and relaxing things the victim has always wanted them to within each others arms allows both partners do. This is done to ensure the victim stays in a chance to reconnect as they come down the relationship from the scene. This is a good time to drink water and eat food to replenish any spent energy Excuses - The abuser will shift blame, make to avoid taking responsibility of their actions Honeymoon The abuser becomes the perfect partner, bringing gifts and doing all the Debrief - When both partners are ready, they Planning The abuser starts feeling a loss of can sit down and discuss what they enjoyed control and begins planning ways for them to about the scene, what did not work in the scene and how they can both do to improve upon future scenes together regain control Set-up - The abuser waits for a time when their abuse can be justified BDSM VS ABUSE PLEASE DON'T HIT ME PLEASE SPANK ME What Is BDSM? What Is Abuse? The use of bodily sensations to elicit pleasureA way to cause physical, mental and/or emotional damage or harm to another person A form of consensual power exchange where It takes away another person's power both participants are empowered Before anything happens, each participant Nobody knows when or how it will happen, must negotiate and come to an agreement ad nobody every negotiates or agrees to it happening Creates excitement to see your partner Causes most people to fear and be afraid their partner Destroys any and all forms of trust Creates, relies upon and builds trust Is designed to help fulfill the desires of both Is the cruel and violent treatment of another partners within a safe environment person Opens communication and supports an No communication, and no support environment where both parties can talk freely about their thoughts and emotions Has rules, limits and boundaries that must be Abuse breaks the law! There are no rules, respected at all times. There are even safetylimits or boundaries. It shows no respect measures in place to make sure none aretowards the victim. crossed. I LOVE SERVING YOU PLEASE HELP ME! WE ALL NEED TO WORK TOGETHER TO END ABUSE THIS IS WHY PEOPLE WHO ENJOY BDSM WORK SO HARD TO ENSURE WHAT THEY DO IS NOT ABUSIVE WHEN PERFORMED BY RESPONSIBLE CONSENTING ADULTS BDSM IS NOT ABUSE BDSMTRAININGACADEMY.COM Abuse References http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm asleepwithoutdreams: technicolour66: whittyonernc: the-quiet-dominant: Time to reblog this I think So important now, especially since THAT movie will be dropping soon in a theater near you! Not going to stop reblogging stuff like this until that celluloid abomination has been and passed.  This is so important
Since That: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
 BDSM AND ABUSE
 ABUSE
 BDSM
 COMMUNICATION
 ABUSE
 GUILT
 SETUP
 DEBRIEF
 AGREEMENT
 PLANNING
 EXCUSES
 AFTERCARESCENE/PLAY
 HONEYMOON

 BDSM Domestic Cycle
 Domestic Abuse Cycle
 Communication Both partners still downAbuse A physical or verbal form of violence
 and talk about what they would both like out is committed against another persor
 of the scene. They discuss things that are off
 limits and safety measures that need to be
 put in place to ensure both people are safe
 Agreement - Both partners agree to what isGuilt - The abuser becomes worried about
 on and off limits for the scene
 play/training scene - This is the time when
 being caught and the potential consequences
 partners can take part in the scene they
 both discussed and agreed upon
 Scene/Play This is the time when both
 partners participate in the activities that were excuses and rationalize in any way they can
 previously discussed and agreed uporn
 Aftercare - After an intense scene, both
 partners can be physically, mentally and
 emotionally drained. Cuddling and relaxing things the victim has always wanted them to
 within each others arms allows both partners do. This is done to ensure the victim stays in
 a chance to reconnect as they come down the relationship
 from the scene. This is a good time to drink
 water and eat food to replenish any spent
 energy
 Excuses - The abuser will shift blame, make
 to avoid taking responsibility of their actions
 Honeymoon The abuser becomes the
 perfect partner, bringing gifts and doing all the
 Debrief - When both partners are ready, they Planning The abuser starts feeling a loss of
 can sit down and discuss what they enjoyed control and begins planning ways for them to
 about the scene, what did not work in the
 scene and how they can both do to improve
 upon future scenes together
 regain control
 Set-up - The abuser waits for a time when
 their abuse can be justified

 BDSM VS ABUSE
 PLEASE DON'T HIT ME
 PLEASE SPANK ME
 What Is BDSM?
 What Is Abuse?
 The use of bodily sensations to elicit pleasureA way to cause physical, mental and/or
 emotional damage or harm to another person
 A form of consensual power exchange where It takes away another person's power
 both participants are empowered
 Before anything happens, each participant Nobody knows when or how it will happen,
 must negotiate and come to an agreement ad nobody every negotiates or agrees to it
 happening
 Creates excitement to see your partner Causes most people to fear and be afraid
 their partner
 Destroys any and all forms of trust
 Creates, relies upon and builds trust
 Is designed to help fulfill the desires of both Is the cruel and violent treatment of another
 partners within a safe environment
 person
 Opens communication and supports an No communication, and no support
 environment where both parties can talk
 freely about their thoughts and emotions

 Has rules, limits and boundaries that must be Abuse breaks the law! There are no rules,
 respected at all times. There are even safetylimits or boundaries. It shows no respect
 measures in place to make sure none aretowards the victim.
 crossed.
 I LOVE SERVING YOU
 PLEASE HELP ME!
 WE ALL NEED TO WORK TOGETHER
 TO END ABUSE
 THIS IS WHY PEOPLE WHO ENJOY BDSM
 WORK SO HARD TO ENSURE WHAT
 THEY DO IS NOT ABUSIVE
 WHEN PERFORMED BY RESPONSIBLE CONSENTING ADULTS
 BDSM IS NOT ABUSE
 BDSMTRAININGACADEMY.COM
 Abuse References
 http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm
asleepwithoutdreams:

technicolour66:

whittyonernc:

the-quiet-dominant:

Time to reblog this I think

So important now, especially since THAT movie will be dropping soon in a theater near you!

Not going to stop reblogging stuff like this until that celluloid abomination has been and passed. 

This is so important

asleepwithoutdreams: technicolour66: whittyonernc: the-quiet-dominant: Time to reblog this I think So important now, especially sinc...

Since That: BEANS MOLE J MEAT CHBESE RKE CILAVIZO SALsA Dear Guy Who Just Made My Burrito: Lucky Shirt in Comedy Corner mybigfatgaylife: its-rowark: misanthrobot: rowan-oak-o-flow: delgt: xopachi: skwinky: lntruding: Have you ever been to earth? On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain: You’re an idiot. Let me further explain: Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito. And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what: Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND. Nope. My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET. You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers. And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE. What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN. I just want a burrito. In conclusion: You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys. UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”: A fucking fork? I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD. If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER. That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL. Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS. A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now. People eat burritos with forks? God is sorry he made us. (Source) I always need this on my blog. I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning.  Yes @kirkfuffle MY FAVORITE FUCKING POST IS BACK. Finally! I wanted to show this to my brother and I’ve been waiting over a year for it to come back! I want this post and one of the “be nice to underpaid workers” posts to fight it out in the Tumblr Performative Progressivism Thunderdome.
Since That: BEANS
 MOLE J MEAT
 CHBESE
 RKE
 CILAVIZO SALsA
 Dear Guy Who Just Made My
 Burrito:
 Lucky Shirt in Comedy Corner
mybigfatgaylife:

its-rowark:

misanthrobot:

rowan-oak-o-flow:

delgt:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:


Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.



UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)


I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

Yes

@kirkfuffle

MY FAVORITE FUCKING POST IS BACK.


Finally! I wanted to show this to my brother and I’ve been waiting over a year for it to come back!


I want this post and one of the “be nice to underpaid workers” posts to fight it out in the Tumblr Performative Progressivism Thunderdome.

mybigfatgaylife: its-rowark: misanthrobot: rowan-oak-o-flow: delgt: xopachi: skwinky: lntruding: Have you ever been to earth? On...