Thats Mean


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    

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    Thats Mean: if i were a zookeeper my intrusive thoughts would be wild
 pumpkinvictor
 brain: slap that penguin. right across his little blubbery
 tummy. it'll jiggle.
 me: no??? that's mean???
 brain: polar bear, then
 pumpkinvictor
 brain: the lons just got fed raw meat
 brain: steal it and eat it in front of them
 me:..
 pumpkinvictor
 ttle-king-smashmouth
 AS A ZOOKEEPERI CAN
 CONFIRM THIS IS 100% A REAL
 STRUGGLE
 rowan i want you to know that this is the best possible reply i
 could have received
 I work with animals and this is true for me. No, I cannot eat
 sea stars out the touch tank no matter HOW good you think
 the cronch will be, brain.
 sometimes you wonder what was going through the head of
 the first human to eat something really weird and then you
 see this post and stop wondering
 harinezumiko
 This 100% was me at the zoo. Don't touch Melon, he's mean.
 Okay, but I have to touch Bob to make him get his stupid emu
 head out of my shirt, so what if I also touch Melon until he
 likes it?
 Sephiroth is angery because he has one wing and sometimes
 attacks people? I want to pet him also. Also he won't get off
 the rock I have to clean anyway, surely a little pets on the
 good side will be fine.
 Martha and Stewart are assholes that tag-team while the
 pond is filling? I bet I could CUDDLE THEM
 The female deer will excitedly nuzzle you in the stomach for
 feeding them. This is fine, because they don't have antlers.
 The male deer is locked up while we're putting out food
 because he will gouge you to death with his little nubby
 asymmetrical homs, because he thinks the females are doing
 it.
 The entire monkey enclosure will eat your fingers for a single
 fruit loop. They also have the smallest arms and can reach
 through holes they ve made in the tarp on the gate to their
 enclosure. Do not hold hands with the monkeys. (2nd gen old
 man monkey will also pee on the keepers that don't give him
 fruit loops. He is a jerk)
 The rehabilitated bear that still sits like she's on a couch
 because she did that when she was living in a crack house?
 Yes, she looks chill. Yes, she looks The Softest. No, do not
 pet her back through the fence. No, do not go into the corridor
 and try to offer treats for pets.
 Big Mac does not know he will break your ribs, but YOU know
 he will break your ribs. Do not enter Big Mac's enclosure no
 matter how much he chuffs and displays his belly and rubs on
 the cage and looks sad. Yes, he genuinely wants pets. Yes,
 Pinkie is deliberately getting pets where he can see it as a
 sign of dominance even though she's a housecat and he
 could eat her in approximately one bite.
 The turtle is mean. Period. He is an old man and he does not
 like you. He does not like the parrot getting fries and he does
 not like that he is in a kiddie pool to warm up because his
 enclosure lost power, and he does not like you behind him
 preparing food for the owls and raptors. Petting him will not
 help this. He will rock back and forth and mean mug you
 forever because he is a
 grumpy old man.
 All of the rabbits need more handling on principle. They don't
 know you and they äre very distressed that you're täking their
 poop away. They can learn, a little, kind of. The guinea pig is
 insane and will not leam. Do not pet the guinea pig.
 this post is gathering some highly blessed zoo stories i love it!
 thank you
 as biologist, can confirm
 brain: that frog is very small
 me: well spotted, brain
 brain: put smol frog in mouth
 me: no!
 brain: that lynx.. .Jooks so fluffy
 me: it does
 brain: we should pet it.
 me: it's awake and
 angry so no.
 brain: baaaaby bunny.
 me: yup
 brain: baby bunny goes in pocket
 me: nooo it doesn't.
 Ah-I read the one about the sea star crunch and I
 immediately thought of if I ate one, what goo would come out.
 Would it be like a mozzarella stick? The texture seems to fit
 right. What if someone served someone a sea star instead of
 a mozzarella stick in the shape of a sea star? Would they eat
 t? Would IilI eat it? What if I knew it was a sea star? Would I
 STILL eat i? I kinda just want mozzarella sticks but now they
 could all be sea star limbs so I have to be careful...
 Source: snowquee..
 Wanimal Bintrusive thoughts 8200
 98,700 notes
Intrusive Thoughts
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Thats Mean: if i were a zookeeper my intrusive thoughts would be wild
 pumpkinvictor
 brain: slap that penguin. right across his little blubbery
 tummy. it'll jiggle.
 me: no??? that's mean???
 brain: polar bear, then
 pumpkinvictor
 brain: the lons just got fed raw meat
 brain: steal it and eat it in front of them
 me:..
 pumpkinvictor
 ttle-king-smashmouth
 AS A ZOOKEEPERI CAN
 CONFIRM THIS IS 100% A REAL
 STRUGGLE
 rowan i want you to know that this is the best possible reply i
 could have received
 I work with animals and this is true for me. No, I cannot eat
 sea stars out the touch tank no matter HOW good you think
 the cronch will be, brain.
 sometimes you wonder what was going through the head of
 the first human to eat something really weird and then you
 see this post and stop wondering
 harinezumiko
 This 100% was me at the zoo. Don't touch Melon, he's mean.
 Okay, but I have to touch Bob to make him get his stupid emu
 head out of my shirt, so what if I also touch Melon until he
 likes it?
 Sephiroth is angery because he has one wing and sometimes
 attacks people? I want to pet him also. Also he won't get off
 the rock I have to clean anyway, surely a little pets on the
 good side will be fine.
 Martha and Stewart are assholes that tag-team while the
 pond is filling? I bet I could CUDDLE THEM
 The female deer will excitedly nuzzle you in the stomach for
 feeding them. This is fine, because they don't have antlers.
 The male deer is locked up while we're putting out food
 because he will gouge you to death with his little nubby
 asymmetrical homs, because he thinks the females are doing
 it.
 The entire monkey enclosure will eat your fingers for a single
 fruit loop. They also have the smallest arms and can reach
 through holes they ve made in the tarp on the gate to their
 enclosure. Do not hold hands with the monkeys. (2nd gen old
 man monkey will also pee on the keepers that don't give him
 fruit loops. He is a jerk)
 The rehabilitated bear that still sits like she's on a couch
 because she did that when she was living in a crack house?
 Yes, she looks chill. Yes, she looks The Softest. No, do not
 pet her back through the fence. No, do not go into the corridor
 and try to offer treats for pets.
 Big Mac does not know he will break your ribs, but YOU know
 he will break your ribs. Do not enter Big Mac's enclosure no
 matter how much he chuffs and displays his belly and rubs on
 the cage and looks sad. Yes, he genuinely wants pets. Yes,
 Pinkie is deliberately getting pets where he can see it as a
 sign of dominance even though she's a housecat and he
 could eat her in approximately one bite.
 The turtle is mean. Period. He is an old man and he does not
 like you. He does not like the parrot getting fries and he does
 not like that he is in a kiddie pool to warm up because his
 enclosure lost power, and he does not like you behind him
 preparing food for the owls and raptors. Petting him will not
 help this. He will rock back and forth and mean mug you
 forever because he is a
 grumpy old man.
 All of the rabbits need more handling on principle. They don't
 know you and they äre very distressed that you're täking their
 poop away. They can learn, a little, kind of. The guinea pig is
 insane and will not leam. Do not pet the guinea pig.
 this post is gathering some highly blessed zoo stories i love it!
 thank you
 as biologist, can confirm
 brain: that frog is very small
 me: well spotted, brain
 brain: put smol frog in mouth
 me: no!
 brain: that lynx.. .Jooks so fluffy
 me: it does
 brain: we should pet it.
 me: it's awake and
 angry so no.
 brain: baaaaby bunny.
 me: yup
 brain: baby bunny goes in pocket
 me: nooo it doesn't.
 Ah-I read the one about the sea star crunch and I
 immediately thought of if I ate one, what goo would come out.
 Would it be like a mozzarella stick? The texture seems to fit
 right. What if someone served someone a sea star instead of
 a mozzarella stick in the shape of a sea star? Would they eat
 t? Would IilI eat it? What if I knew it was a sea star? Would I
 STILL eat i? I kinda just want mozzarella sticks but now they
 could all be sea star limbs so I have to be careful...
 Source: snowquee..
 Wanimal Bintrusive thoughts 8200
 98,700 notes
Intrusive Thoughts
                
            

            
            
Intrusive Thoughts

            
            
        

    



        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            







    Thats Mean: Mochi being a good pup for the vet
So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take a quick water break and he turn around for a sec and low key? Homeboy got the above-butt dimples. SOME MEN HAVE ABOVE-BUTT DIMPLES? I AIN'T EEN REMOTELY GAY, BUT STILL...INTERESTING! I WAS STARTLED 😂. Like how u gon just slap one of the sexiest little features a woman can have...on a random ass dude? Like could u imagine if 0.0001% of men just randomly had titties? Not like obese dudes at the pool with titties I done seen that I mean like a regular dude with a set of clean, crisp, hairless, bounteous, glistening titties. Shit would be wild! Like u would bring a dude named Bill in for a interview and Sally the head of HR just gon be like "Bill Johnson is coming in at 1 pm, remind your team please BILL IS SPECIAL." And everyone know what that mean. And Bill walk in wearing brooks brothers suit pants and wing tip shoes and brooks brothers jacket but instead of a white dress shirt and tie he just wearing a Nike sports running bra because DUH that's what men do why u think we wear basketball shorts iss to put our shit on display 🤗. And Bill in the interview just like "yeah after we got acquired by a private equity firm the culture changed and I wish them well but I'm looking to bring my clients here. Hey let's address the elephant in the room, I have boobs lol. They're fucking nice, too. Wanna suck on em? 😎" Now a group of grown men sucking Bill's titties. They ain't even touching PPs it ain't een gay like that they just taking turns respectfully doing a lil suckysuck. Just a lil bit! U feel me? But nah. Men don't have real titties. But apparently a select few of them got above-butt dimples. Interesting!!! ☺️😂😂😂 (📷: Reddit u-luckytattoos)
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Thats Mean: Mochi being a good pup for the vet
So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take a quick water break and he turn around for a sec and low key? Homeboy got the above-butt dimples. SOME MEN HAVE ABOVE-BUTT DIMPLES? I AIN'T EEN REMOTELY GAY, BUT STILL...INTERESTING! I WAS STARTLED 😂. Like how u gon just slap one of the sexiest little features a woman can have...on a random ass dude? Like could u imagine if 0.0001% of men just randomly had titties? Not like obese dudes at the pool with titties I done seen that I mean like a regular dude with a set of clean, crisp, hairless, bounteous, glistening titties. Shit would be wild! Like u would bring a dude named Bill in for a interview and Sally the head of HR just gon be like "Bill Johnson is coming in at 1 pm, remind your team please BILL IS SPECIAL." And everyone know what that mean. And Bill walk in wearing brooks brothers suit pants and wing tip shoes and brooks brothers jacket but instead of a white dress shirt and tie he just wearing a Nike sports running bra because DUH that's what men do why u think we wear basketball shorts iss to put our shit on display 🤗. And Bill in the interview just like "yeah after we got acquired by a private equity firm the culture changed and I wish them well but I'm looking to bring my clients here. Hey let's address the elephant in the room, I have boobs lol. They're fucking nice, too. Wanna suck on em? 😎" Now a group of grown men sucking Bill's titties. They ain't even touching PPs it ain't een gay like that they just taking turns respectfully doing a lil suckysuck. Just a lil bit! U feel me? But nah. Men don't have real titties. But apparently a select few of them got above-butt dimples. Interesting!!! ☺️😂😂😂 (📷: Reddit u-luckytattoos)
                
            

            
            
So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We t...

            
            
        

    



        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            






        

        
        

            







    Thats Mean: Jorah has reached the Citadel. Does that mean he's going to find a cure and go back to Daenerys' army?
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Thats Mean: Jorah has reached the Citadel. Does that mean he's going to find a cure and go back to Daenerys' army?
                
            

            
            
Jorah has reached the Citadel. Does that mean he's going to find a cure and go back to Daenerys' army?