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Af, Apparently, and Ass: Mochi being a good pup for the vet So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take a quick water break and he turn around for a sec and low key? Homeboy got the above-butt dimples. SOME MEN HAVE ABOVE-BUTT DIMPLES? I AIN'T EEN REMOTELY GAY, BUT STILL...INTERESTING! I WAS STARTLED πŸ˜‚. Like how u gon just slap one of the sexiest little features a woman can have...on a random ass dude? Like could u imagine if 0.0001% of men just randomly had titties? Not like obese dudes at the pool with titties I done seen that I mean like a regular dude with a set of clean, crisp, hairless, bounteous, glistening titties. Shit would be wild! Like u would bring a dude named Bill in for a interview and Sally the head of HR just gon be like "Bill Johnson is coming in at 1 pm, remind your team please BILL IS SPECIAL." And everyone know what that mean. And Bill walk in wearing brooks brothers suit pants and wing tip shoes and brooks brothers jacket but instead of a white dress shirt and tie he just wearing a Nike sports running bra because DUH that's what men do why u think we wear basketball shorts iss to put our shit on display πŸ€—. And Bill in the interview just like "yeah after we got acquired by a private equity firm the culture changed and I wish them well but I'm looking to bring my clients here. Hey let's address the elephant in the room, I have boobs lol. They're fucking nice, too. Wanna suck on em? 😎" Now a group of grown men sucking Bill's titties. They ain't even touching PPs it ain't een gay like that they just taking turns respectfully doing a lil suckysuck. Just a lil bit! U feel me? But nah. Men don't have real titties. But apparently a select few of them got above-butt dimples. Interesting!!! β˜ΊοΈπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ (πŸ“·: Reddit u-luckytattoos)
Af, Apparently, and Ass: Mochi being a good pup for the vet
So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take a quick water break and he turn around for a sec and low key? Homeboy got the above-butt dimples. SOME MEN HAVE ABOVE-BUTT DIMPLES? I AIN'T EEN REMOTELY GAY, BUT STILL...INTERESTING! I WAS STARTLED πŸ˜‚. Like how u gon just slap one of the sexiest little features a woman can have...on a random ass dude? Like could u imagine if 0.0001% of men just randomly had titties? Not like obese dudes at the pool with titties I done seen that I mean like a regular dude with a set of clean, crisp, hairless, bounteous, glistening titties. Shit would be wild! Like u would bring a dude named Bill in for a interview and Sally the head of HR just gon be like "Bill Johnson is coming in at 1 pm, remind your team please BILL IS SPECIAL." And everyone know what that mean. And Bill walk in wearing brooks brothers suit pants and wing tip shoes and brooks brothers jacket but instead of a white dress shirt and tie he just wearing a Nike sports running bra because DUH that's what men do why u think we wear basketball shorts iss to put our shit on display πŸ€—. And Bill in the interview just like "yeah after we got acquired by a private equity firm the culture changed and I wish them well but I'm looking to bring my clients here. Hey let's address the elephant in the room, I have boobs lol. They're fucking nice, too. Wanna suck on em? 😎" Now a group of grown men sucking Bill's titties. They ain't even touching PPs it ain't een gay like that they just taking turns respectfully doing a lil suckysuck. Just a lil bit! U feel me? But nah. Men don't have real titties. But apparently a select few of them got above-butt dimples. Interesting!!! β˜ΊοΈπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ (πŸ“·: Reddit u-luckytattoos)

So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take...

Ass, Bad, and Bad Bitch: Senior: I love you. Can we fuck? Freshman: Yeah Senior: BOONK GANG whole lotta gang shit Why do people think running a meme page is easy. This probably the worse thing to ever happen to me. Don't get me wrong I love my followers but I hate the hoes online and the fashionova promotions. I'm tired of opening my dms to " I love your page so much bro it would mean a lot to me if you shouted me out.". Most of the girls that I dm live on the other side of the world and would require me to use my nimbus to travel the seven seas for some pussy. My mom constantly on my ass about running my data up. Verizon be expensive too. My phone always dead because I'm senselessly refreshing iG to not look awkward when I'm standing near a bad bitch. Instagram be draining my battery too. My phone be over heated all the time. Phone has the inferno of 1000 hot pockets. Once your friends find out you run a meme page they switch up. All you gonna hear is "yooo bro shout me out" I don't even get a "how you doing bro" no more. When people at my school found out I ran a meme page they asked 21 questions. I don't wanna talk about my crippling depression that I use pictures with subtitles to fill that void. When I post shoutouts people be in my ass. Like damn fam can I get this 40 for this 8th about to smoke? I be seeing super sized titties, oiled up booties in thongs from these insta thots all the time but let a meme be about white people, homosexuality or feminist and I'm flagged quicker than I cum. Fuck instagram we back on MySpace.
Ass, Bad, and Bad Bitch: Senior: I love you. Can we fuck?
 Freshman: Yeah
 Senior: BOONK GANG whole
 lotta gang shit
Why do people think running a meme page is easy. This probably the worse thing to ever happen to me. Don't get me wrong I love my followers but I hate the hoes online and the fashionova promotions. I'm tired of opening my dms to " I love your page so much bro it would mean a lot to me if you shouted me out.". Most of the girls that I dm live on the other side of the world and would require me to use my nimbus to travel the seven seas for some pussy. My mom constantly on my ass about running my data up. Verizon be expensive too. My phone always dead because I'm senselessly refreshing iG to not look awkward when I'm standing near a bad bitch. Instagram be draining my battery too. My phone be over heated all the time. Phone has the inferno of 1000 hot pockets. Once your friends find out you run a meme page they switch up. All you gonna hear is "yooo bro shout me out" I don't even get a "how you doing bro" no more. When people at my school found out I ran a meme page they asked 21 questions. I don't wanna talk about my crippling depression that I use pictures with subtitles to fill that void. When I post shoutouts people be in my ass. Like damn fam can I get this 40 for this 8th about to smoke? I be seeing super sized titties, oiled up booties in thongs from these insta thots all the time but let a meme be about white people, homosexuality or feminist and I'm flagged quicker than I cum. Fuck instagram we back on MySpace.

Why do people think running a meme page is easy. This probably the worse thing to ever happen to me. Don't get me wrong I love my followers ...

Ass, Bless Up, and Bones: im on a dinner date what do i say shes so cute im so nervous Now see bruh women like to test men. Part of they mission on this earth is to set occasional bear traps for us to see what we say. A big part of being a successful grown ass man is SEEING the traps and walking AROUND them ☺️. One obvious trap is "do I look fat in this?" But that's a easy one. Like if u can't pass that test that's God telling u that u ain't ready for a grown woman yet and u need training wheels for a few more years before u get to that level of bicycle ridery lol. But see some bear traps are trickier. My favorite one is when u talking to a girl in her mid 30s and she hit u with that throwback pic from when she was 20: "OMG lol this came up on Facebook". MEN. STOP. BE CAREFUL. THIS SHIT LOOK INNOCUOUS BUT ISSA BOWL OF HONEY INSIDE A STEEL LEG TRAP THAT'S GON CLOSE ON U AND CRUNCH YO MF BONES UP, LISTEN. Here go the WRONG answer: "LOL HOLY FUCK! There go baby Kim! Lil 20 year old Kim lookin just about fine as FUCK! Look at them titties! Lookin all perky and shit! U prolly ain even need a bra for them miracle titties lol! And them thighs! Thick but no dimples on em FUCK. Look at that smile! Braces fresh off lookin like a LICK! LOL 20 YEAR OLD KIM COULD GET IT!!" Oh no. Oh hell no. *grandmotherly black dude voice* OH NO BAYBEH WHAT IZZU DOIN, LAWWWD BAYBEH. πŸ˜‚ Here's how she gon reply: "πŸ˜–", "k", "ew", "wow". U feel me? "Jeez". U GAVE THE WRONG FUCKING ANSWER BRUH. Lemme give u the RIGHT answer: "aw cute. You done glo'd the FUCK up tho - safe to say I met you at the perfect time 😍". Ok? That's a bear who saw the trap, did a small bear trap dance, danced around it, and lived to walk (and run! And dance!) another day. Ok? Copy and paste this response DON'T GET CREATIVE AND PUT IT IN YOUR "own voice" I DON'T TRUST YALL Bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Ass, Bless Up, and Bones: im on a dinner date what do i say shes
 so cute im so nervous
Now see bruh women like to test men. Part of they mission on this earth is to set occasional bear traps for us to see what we say. A big part of being a successful grown ass man is SEEING the traps and walking AROUND them ☺️. One obvious trap is "do I look fat in this?" But that's a easy one. Like if u can't pass that test that's God telling u that u ain't ready for a grown woman yet and u need training wheels for a few more years before u get to that level of bicycle ridery lol. But see some bear traps are trickier. My favorite one is when u talking to a girl in her mid 30s and she hit u with that throwback pic from when she was 20: "OMG lol this came up on Facebook". MEN. STOP. BE CAREFUL. THIS SHIT LOOK INNOCUOUS BUT ISSA BOWL OF HONEY INSIDE A STEEL LEG TRAP THAT'S GON CLOSE ON U AND CRUNCH YO MF BONES UP, LISTEN. Here go the WRONG answer: "LOL HOLY FUCK! There go baby Kim! Lil 20 year old Kim lookin just about fine as FUCK! Look at them titties! Lookin all perky and shit! U prolly ain even need a bra for them miracle titties lol! And them thighs! Thick but no dimples on em FUCK. Look at that smile! Braces fresh off lookin like a LICK! LOL 20 YEAR OLD KIM COULD GET IT!!" Oh no. Oh hell no. *grandmotherly black dude voice* OH NO BAYBEH WHAT IZZU DOIN, LAWWWD BAYBEH. πŸ˜‚ Here's how she gon reply: "πŸ˜–", "k", "ew", "wow". U feel me? "Jeez". U GAVE THE WRONG FUCKING ANSWER BRUH. Lemme give u the RIGHT answer: "aw cute. You done glo'd the FUCK up tho - safe to say I met you at the perfect time 😍". Ok? That's a bear who saw the trap, did a small bear trap dance, danced around it, and lived to walk (and run! And dance!) another day. Ok? Copy and paste this response DON'T GET CREATIVE AND PUT IT IN YOUR "own voice" I DON'T TRUST YALL Bless up πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Now see bruh women like to test men. Part of they mission on this earth is to set occasional bear traps for us to see what we say. A big par...

Ass, Girls, and Pop: Am I the only one who does this? I know Ima get hate for this but girls don't got any idea the suffering dudes go through with random boners popping up everywhere. They got pregnancy and periods but we got an overactive snake in our pants. Imagine this snake is a spoiled fucker and never listens to you and pops up whenever he feels like it. Only way to get rid of the snake is to pet it profusely till it calms down. But what happens if you're in public and can't pet that nigga until you get home? Ima tell y'all what to do in that situation. As soon as ya snake wanna try some fuck shit and pop up. Strangle that fucker with both hands. Make sure you got it in a vice grip. Smack it around. Grab ya waist band from ya boxers or pants and tuck that fuck nigga in there. Make sure you put most of the girth into the waist band or else it'll get loose againπŸ’ͺ🏽. You don't want that. Shit if you wanna go the extra mile. Cut a rubber band in half and wrap it round ya belt loops. You got yourself a makeshift snake gate. Oh yeah make sure you wear a shirt that's a size larger then what you normally wear cause half ya dick gone be laid flat against ya stomach when you subdue the suspect. If you got a small dick don't stress it, just sag ya jeans to meet ya dick level. This technique saved me at my 8th grade dance. Saw shortie in a aqua blue dress with non existent ass and titties. Something bout her got a boy going. Thats a story for later tho.
Ass, Girls, and Pop: Am I the only one who does this?
I know Ima get hate for this but girls don't got any idea the suffering dudes go through with random boners popping up everywhere. They got pregnancy and periods but we got an overactive snake in our pants. Imagine this snake is a spoiled fucker and never listens to you and pops up whenever he feels like it. Only way to get rid of the snake is to pet it profusely till it calms down. But what happens if you're in public and can't pet that nigga until you get home? Ima tell y'all what to do in that situation. As soon as ya snake wanna try some fuck shit and pop up. Strangle that fucker with both hands. Make sure you got it in a vice grip. Smack it around. Grab ya waist band from ya boxers or pants and tuck that fuck nigga in there. Make sure you put most of the girth into the waist band or else it'll get loose againπŸ’ͺ🏽. You don't want that. Shit if you wanna go the extra mile. Cut a rubber band in half and wrap it round ya belt loops. You got yourself a makeshift snake gate. Oh yeah make sure you wear a shirt that's a size larger then what you normally wear cause half ya dick gone be laid flat against ya stomach when you subdue the suspect. If you got a small dick don't stress it, just sag ya jeans to meet ya dick level. This technique saved me at my 8th grade dance. Saw shortie in a aqua blue dress with non existent ass and titties. Something bout her got a boy going. Thats a story for later tho.

I know Ima get hate for this but girls don't got any idea the suffering dudes go through with random boners popping up everywhere. They got ...