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urine: Wear Your Mask: The Urine Test
urine: Wear Your Mask: The Urine Test

Wear Your Mask: The Urine Test

urine: Urine a Dream
urine: Urine a Dream

Urine a Dream

urine: I’m getting oldeeeer by xd_urine MORE MEMES
urine: I’m getting oldeeeer by xd_urine
MORE MEMES

I’m getting oldeeeer by xd_urine MORE MEMES

urine: 5 hours ago Hello! My husband is repulsed by my aged urine rubs. He hates every single hing about it. Even with the essential oils, he says he still smells it all over me- even to the point he doesnt want to touch me. Should I compromise by only drinking it and using it up the nose ears ect. I have literally tried everything to get rid of the smell. he even says the jars look like dead waste. please i need some help here I will give you the same advice I gave who is now a member of this group to0,when his husband was complaining about AU. Leave him. There are other fish in the sea, and had he never left we wouldve never began our journey together United by AU. Aged urine rubs with a partner are electrifying spiritually DO 33 4h Like Reply bogleech: bogleech: I have to agree with the response, if you truly can’t bear life without lathering yourself up in your own rotting piss juice because you think it’s magic, you should probably do the right thing and spare your loved ones from yourself. Oh no, you mean some of you still didn’t know that FERMENTED HUMAN PISS is the latest homeopathic health craze??? They drink it, they bathe in it, they buy and trade it, they think it’ll cure cancer and de-age them and boost their immunity and anything else they feel like making up.Mark my words, eating shit is probably next. The funniest part is these are the same people obsessed with “detoxifying” their bodies. What the fuck do they think piss IS. they totally have a fetish…
urine: 5 hours ago
 Hello! My husband is repulsed by my aged
 urine rubs. He hates every single hing about it.
 Even with the essential oils, he says he still
 smells it all over me- even to the point he
 doesnt want to touch me. Should I compromise
 by only drinking it and using it up the nose ears
 ect. I have literally tried everything to get rid of
 the smell. he even says the jars look like dead
 waste. please i need some help here

 I will give you the same advice I gave
 who is now a member of
 this group to0,when his husband was
 complaining about AU. Leave him.
 There are other fish in the sea, and
 had he never left we wouldve never
 began our journey together United by
 AU. Aged urine rubs with a partner
 are electrifying spiritually
 DO
 33
 4h Like Reply
bogleech:

bogleech:
I have to agree with the response, if you truly can’t bear life without lathering yourself up in your own rotting piss juice because you think it’s magic, you should probably do the right thing and spare your loved ones from yourself.
Oh no, you mean some of you still didn’t know that FERMENTED HUMAN PISS is the latest homeopathic health craze??? They drink it, they bathe in it, they buy and trade it, they think it’ll cure cancer and de-age them and boost their immunity and anything else they feel like making up.Mark my words, eating shit is probably next.
The funniest part is these are the same people obsessed with “detoxifying” their bodies. What the fuck do they think piss IS.

they totally have a fetish…

bogleech: bogleech: I have to agree with the response, if you truly can’t bear life without lathering yourself up in your own rotting pi...

urine: 1:42 PM Tweet Alexandra Erin Retweeted Audrey @Turbocrit Gamer dudes are wild they'll play a game about overthrowing a corrupt monarch but if there's 1 gay character in it then it's "too political" 8/25/17, 1:50 PM 4,764 Retweets 11.6K Likes Audrey Turbocrit 14h Replying to @Turbocrit Not to mention the whole "having a gay/trans character in a high fantasy setting is completely unrealistic. Also here's some dragons" thing 8 237 829 WC @Hexy27Bernie1 7h Tweet your reply definitelygayrpgideas: definitelygayrpgideas: thesallowbeldam: kirinandvlindertje: vaishino: atomic-darth: pupperoni-pizza: didntfitthenarrative: mitch-turn: Sweet generalization. It’s not about whether a character is trans or gay. Gay characters make sense. People have been gay for millennia. Trans however. Not the case. In a high fantasy setting, how in the balls are they going to perform surgery where they change the sex of the character??? It makes no sense at all. They’d have to explain it. And remember, this is high fantasy, Game of Thrones is also in that category. This is a time where they would reach into your body with an object strikingly similar to a salad tossing spoon to yank out a small piece of arrowhead. Pretty sure they hadn’t figured out a surgery as complex as a sex change… The people complaining that there aren’t enough gay/trans people in stuff like this are just as bad if not moreso than the people who complain about gay/trans people being in stuff like this. Create your own fantasy world filled with nothing but gay/trans people. Make it so that being heterosexual is the minority. All the power to you. Good luck trying to create it. You don’t have to have surgery to be transgender. Lots of transgender people don’t. Transgender people, people who identify with the gender not corresponding with their birth sex, have existed before the surgery. And the existence of and recognition of a third sex or dual sex existed in pre-modern times in lots of places are the world.So, for one, your “how in the balls are they going to perform surgery“ question doesn’t actually matter. They don’t need to in order for transgender people to exist.But if they did want to include transgender people who undergo physical changes to reflect their gender/sexual identity, in a HIGH FANTASY world, there’s actually a really easy answer to that: *ahem* “How are you going to make someone trans in a fantasy setting full of magic spells, potions, and artifacts?” shout out to the elixir of sex shift for covering more than just a gender binary. also lets not forget that in ye old days (aka time of the ancient greeks (aka the bc years)) that people drank the urine of pregnant mares to feminize themselves. like, trans people find a way ;) …the fucking Sumerians had trans people, brosky. Sumerians. They didn’t even have fucking iron, but they had trans women. dude lemme find you a fucking. girdle of sex change from 1st edition woah what’s that?? the first edition efreet cover??? OH HEY ITS A FUCKING GIRDLE OF SEX CHANGE AND THERES ALSO A POSSIBILITY IT REMOVES ALL SEX CHARACTERISTICS FROM THE WEARER it’s on page 145 of the dmg 1st ed. want an easier-to-read screenshot of a pdf?? tldr fuck you it’s pride month welcome back to “tldr fuck you” anyways dnd says trans & nb rights
urine: 1:42 PM
 Tweet
 Alexandra Erin Retweeted
 Audrey
 @Turbocrit
 Gamer dudes are wild they'll play a game
 about overthrowing a corrupt monarch
 but if there's 1 gay character in it then it's
 "too political"
 8/25/17, 1:50 PM
 4,764 Retweets 11.6K Likes
 Audrey Turbocrit 14h
 Replying to @Turbocrit
 Not to mention the whole "having a gay/trans
 character in a high fantasy setting is
 completely unrealistic. Also here's some
 dragons" thing
 8
 237
 829
 WC @Hexy27Bernie1 7h
 Tweet your reply
definitelygayrpgideas:
definitelygayrpgideas:

thesallowbeldam:

kirinandvlindertje:

vaishino:

atomic-darth:

pupperoni-pizza:

didntfitthenarrative:

mitch-turn:

Sweet generalization. 
It’s not about whether a character is trans or gay. Gay characters make sense. People have been gay for millennia. Trans however. Not the case. In a high fantasy setting, how in the balls are they going to perform surgery where they change the sex of the character??? It makes no sense at all. They’d have to explain it. And remember, this is high fantasy, Game of Thrones is also in that category. This is a time where they would reach into your body with an object strikingly similar to a salad tossing spoon to yank out a small piece of arrowhead. Pretty sure they hadn’t figured out a surgery as complex as a sex change…
The people complaining that there aren’t enough gay/trans people in stuff like this are just as bad if not moreso than the people who complain about gay/trans people being in stuff like this.
Create your own fantasy world filled with nothing but gay/trans people. Make it so that being heterosexual is the minority. All the power to you. Good luck trying to create it.

You don’t have to have surgery to be transgender. Lots of transgender people don’t. Transgender people, people who identify with the gender not corresponding with their birth sex, have existed before the surgery. And the existence of and recognition of a third sex or dual sex existed in pre-modern times in lots of places are the world.So, for one, your “how in the balls are they going to perform surgery“ question doesn’t actually matter. They don’t need to in order for transgender people to exist.But if they did want to include transgender people who undergo physical changes to reflect their gender/sexual identity, in a HIGH FANTASY world, there’s actually a really easy answer to that:

*ahem*


“How are you going to make someone trans in a fantasy setting full of magic spells, potions, and artifacts?”

shout out to the elixir of sex shift for covering more than just a gender binary.

also lets not forget that in ye old days (aka time of the ancient greeks (aka the bc years)) that people drank the urine of pregnant mares to feminize themselves. like, trans people find a way ;)

…the fucking Sumerians had trans people, brosky.
Sumerians.
They didn’t even have fucking iron, but they had trans women.

dude lemme find you a fucking. girdle of sex change from 1st edition
woah what’s that?? the first edition efreet cover???
OH HEY ITS A FUCKING GIRDLE OF SEX CHANGE AND THERES ALSO A POSSIBILITY IT REMOVES ALL SEX CHARACTERISTICS FROM THE WEARER
it’s on page 145 of the dmg 1st ed. want an easier-to-read screenshot of a pdf??
tldr fuck you

it’s pride month welcome back to “tldr fuck you” anyways dnd says trans & nb rights

definitelygayrpgideas: definitelygayrpgideas: thesallowbeldam: kirinandvlindertje: vaishino: atomic-darth: pupperoni-pizza: didntfi...

urine: 1:42 PM Tweet Alexandra Erin Retweeted Audrey @Turbocrit Gamer dudes are wild they'll play a game about overthrowing a corrupt monarch but if there's 1 gay character in it then it's "too political" 8/25/17, 1:50 PM 4,764 Retweets 11.6K Likes Audrey Turbocrit 14h Replying to @Turbocrit Not to mention the whole "having a gay/trans character in a high fantasy setting is completely unrealistic. Also here's some dragons" thing 8 237 829 WC @Hexy27Bernie1 7h Tweet your reply definitelygayrpgideas: definitelygayrpgideas: thesallowbeldam: kirinandvlindertje: vaishino: atomic-darth: pupperoni-pizza: didntfitthenarrative: mitch-turn: Sweet generalization. It’s not about whether a character is trans or gay. Gay characters make sense. People have been gay for millennia. Trans however. Not the case. In a high fantasy setting, how in the balls are they going to perform surgery where they change the sex of the character??? It makes no sense at all. They’d have to explain it. And remember, this is high fantasy, Game of Thrones is also in that category. This is a time where they would reach into your body with an object strikingly similar to a salad tossing spoon to yank out a small piece of arrowhead. Pretty sure they hadn’t figured out a surgery as complex as a sex change… The people complaining that there aren’t enough gay/trans people in stuff like this are just as bad if not moreso than the people who complain about gay/trans people being in stuff like this. Create your own fantasy world filled with nothing but gay/trans people. Make it so that being heterosexual is the minority. All the power to you. Good luck trying to create it. You don’t have to have surgery to be transgender. Lots of transgender people don’t. Transgender people, people who identify with the gender not corresponding with their birth sex, have existed before the surgery. And the existence of and recognition of a third sex or dual sex existed in pre-modern times in lots of places are the world.So, for one, your “how in the balls are they going to perform surgery“ question doesn’t actually matter. They don’t need to in order for transgender people to exist.But if they did want to include transgender people who undergo physical changes to reflect their gender/sexual identity, in a HIGH FANTASY world, there’s actually a really easy answer to that: *ahem* “How are you going to make someone trans in a fantasy setting full of magic spells, potions, and artifacts?” shout out to the elixir of sex shift for covering more than just a gender binary. also lets not forget that in ye old days (aka time of the ancient greeks (aka the bc years)) that people drank the urine of pregnant mares to feminize themselves. like, trans people find a way ;) …the fucking Sumerians had trans people, brosky. Sumerians. They didn’t even have fucking iron, but they had trans women. dude lemme find you a fucking. girdle of sex change from 1st edition woah what’s that?? the first edition efreet cover??? OH HEY ITS A FUCKING GIRDLE OF SEX CHANGE AND THERES ALSO A POSSIBILITY IT REMOVES ALL SEX CHARACTERISTICS FROM THE WEARER it’s on page 145 of the dmg 1st ed. want an easier-to-read screenshot of a pdf?? tldr fuck you it’s pride month welcome back to “tldr fuck you” anyways dnd says trans nb rights
urine: 1:42 PM
 Tweet
 Alexandra Erin Retweeted
 Audrey
 @Turbocrit
 Gamer dudes are wild they'll play a game
 about overthrowing a corrupt monarch
 but if there's 1 gay character in it then it's
 "too political"
 8/25/17, 1:50 PM
 4,764 Retweets 11.6K Likes
 Audrey Turbocrit 14h
 Replying to @Turbocrit
 Not to mention the whole "having a gay/trans
 character in a high fantasy setting is
 completely unrealistic. Also here's some
 dragons" thing
 8
 237
 829
 WC @Hexy27Bernie1 7h
 Tweet your reply
definitelygayrpgideas:

definitelygayrpgideas:

thesallowbeldam:

kirinandvlindertje:

vaishino:

atomic-darth:

pupperoni-pizza:

didntfitthenarrative:

mitch-turn:

Sweet generalization. 
It’s not about whether a character is trans or gay. Gay characters make sense. People have been gay for millennia. Trans however. Not the case. In a high fantasy setting, how in the balls are they going to perform surgery where they change the sex of the character??? It makes no sense at all. They’d have to explain it. And remember, this is high fantasy, Game of Thrones is also in that category. This is a time where they would reach into your body with an object strikingly similar to a salad tossing spoon to yank out a small piece of arrowhead. Pretty sure they hadn’t figured out a surgery as complex as a sex change…
The people complaining that there aren’t enough gay/trans people in stuff like this are just as bad if not moreso than the people who complain about gay/trans people being in stuff like this.
Create your own fantasy world filled with nothing but gay/trans people. Make it so that being heterosexual is the minority. All the power to you. Good luck trying to create it.

You don’t have to have surgery to be transgender. Lots of transgender people don’t. Transgender people, people who identify with the gender not corresponding with their birth sex, have existed before the surgery. And the existence of and recognition of a third sex or dual sex existed in pre-modern times in lots of places are the world.So, for one, your “how in the balls are they going to perform surgery“ question doesn’t actually matter. They don’t need to in order for transgender people to exist.But if they did want to include transgender people who undergo physical changes to reflect their gender/sexual identity, in a HIGH FANTASY world, there’s actually a really easy answer to that:

*ahem*


“How are you going to make someone trans in a fantasy setting full of magic spells, potions, and artifacts?”

shout out to the elixir of sex shift for covering more than just a gender binary.

also lets not forget that in ye old days (aka time of the ancient greeks (aka the bc years)) that people drank the urine of pregnant mares to feminize themselves. like, trans people find a way ;)

…the fucking Sumerians had trans people, brosky.
Sumerians.
They didn’t even have fucking iron, but they had trans women.

dude lemme find you a fucking. girdle of sex change from 1st edition
woah what’s that?? the first edition efreet cover???
OH HEY ITS A FUCKING GIRDLE OF SEX CHANGE AND THERES ALSO A POSSIBILITY IT REMOVES ALL SEX CHARACTERISTICS FROM THE WEARER
it’s on page 145 of the dmg 1st ed. want an easier-to-read screenshot of a pdf??
tldr fuck you

it’s pride month welcome back to “tldr fuck you” anyways dnd says trans  nb rights

definitelygayrpgideas: definitelygayrpgideas: thesallowbeldam: kirinandvlindertje: vaishino: atomic-darth: pupperoni-pizza: didntf...

urine: feniczoroark: minority-cubed: princemetalthunder: skrill-cosby: drucila616: How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. oh my god these are great fuck this is like reading a jokes and not actual quotes The last one is how I feel about all my schoolmates I can feel the frustration
urine: feniczoroark:

minority-cubed:

princemetalthunder:

skrill-cosby:

drucila616:

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

oh my god these are great

fuck this is like reading a jokes and not actual quotes


The last one is how I feel about all my schoolmates

I can feel the frustration

feniczoroark: minority-cubed: princemetalthunder: skrill-cosby: drucila616: How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are fro...

urine: Take Medication On An EMPTY STOMACH 1 Hour Before or 2 to 3 Hours After a Meal Unless Otherwise Directed By Your Dr.when taking this medication OBTAIN MEDICAL ADVICE before taking non-prescription drugs, some may effect the action of this DO NOT DRINK ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES AR MAY CAUSE It is very IMPORTANT that you Take or TM DISCOLORATION OF THE URINE OR FECES Use THIS EXACTLY AS DIRECTED Do not skip doses or discontinbe unless directed by your doctor EXTERNAL USE ONLY CHEW TABLETS BEFORE SWALLOWING 4FOR THE NOSE We OWE You May Cause Drowsiness SHAKE WELL AND KEEP IN con Do With TAKE WITH FOOD OR MILK REFRIGERATOR It may be advisable to drink IMPORTANT FINISH ALL THIS MEDICATION UNLESS OTHERWISE DIRECTED BY PRESCRIBER CA a full glass of orange juice AND KEEP IN or eat a banana daily while REFRIGERATOR DO NOT REFRIGERATE may cause DROWSINESS. USE taking this medication. May cause DROWSINESS ALCOHOL may INTENSIFY this a TM acar or dangerous machi nating effect. Use care when TM a car or dangerous machinery uilciAn ω T MY PILLS M SCAREN DO NOT TAKE CK CONSEOUT NOW L ASPIRIN A ve wa TOUT THE CARE when operating a car e CONSENT OF YOUR PHYSICIAN NSING, N or TAKE WITH FOOD MEDICATION SHOULD BE- DOl TAKEN WITH PLENTY OF WATE DO NOT TAKE WITH NITRATES MAY FOR THE NOSE MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS OR DIZZINESS 01976 SOME NONPRESCRIPTION DRUGS MAY May Cause DROWSINESS MEDICATION SHOULD BE REFR Disco Al AGGRAVATE YOUR READ ALL LABELS CAREFULLY KEEP IN REFRIGERATOR DO NOT FREEZE IF A WARNING TAKE WITH my TAKEN WATERNTY OF FOOD SHAKE W ORDER TM PLEAS AHEAD A
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 AHEAD
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urine: AN AVERAGE SATURDAY MORNING: WITH KIDS VS. WITHOUT KID WITH KIDS TIME WITHOUT KIDS Time to get up! Someone peed 6:00 You won't be getting up for 5 through his diaper and now your bed is covered in urine more You change a diaper and try to get the kid to sleep a little longer but now the he's yelling zoo animals and doing flips on the 6:30 You made some breakfast for your child, but today he decided he hates eggs. He's saying he wants "scrims" but you don't know what that means. He won't explain and just keeps yelling "scrims" louder and louder 7:00 Your pillow got a little warm so you turn it over and go back to You've now watched the same episode of Spongebob four times. One time you tried to change it over to the news and your kid shoved a spoon in the Tranquil visions dance in your 8:00 O0 head as the sweet embrace of slumber engulfs your resting body You attempt to take a shower but your kid keeps throwing can openers into the tub. You weren't aware that you hacd multiple can openers An angel comes down and gently kisses your forehead. Sleep well, sweet prince 8:30 You walk upstairs to your room, but didn't realize your kid was using the stairs as a stunt zone for Hot Wheels and you slip on one and nearly die as you tumble back down to the A hummingbird perches itself outside your window and sings a sweet lullaby. He blows you a kiss and soars away 9:00 You try to finally go to the bathroom, but forgot to lock the door so now your kid is crying because you won't let him dump sand in your lap. He dumps it on the dog instead. The sand was actually used cat litter You wake briefly to adjust your sleep number. (You bought an adjustable bed with all the disposable income you have from not having a kid.) 9:30 You hear laughter, which is almost more terrifying than crying. You walk in the living room to see your kid making 10:00 S Still sleeping soundly, like a puppy in front of a crackling snow angels in glue. There's no way you're getting your deposit back with a giant glue angel in the middle of the carpet Your kid doses off and you try to catch up on your favorite show You stir a little and check your texts. Your friend wants to go to brunch later. That sounds nice 30 more minutes of sleep and you'll get ready for that. Maybe go to mall later or ride go-karts Unfortunately, six minutes into it 10:30 there's a dramatic moment where the music builds and your kid is now wide-awake. (Screw You get everyone loaded into the car to go to the zoo, even though it's 90 degrees and so humid taxidermy is coming back to life. Your kid yells a racial slur he heard in a movie. Out of all the words he's heard, that's the only one that stuck. You wake up feeling refreshed and beautiful. You know what? It's Saturday. Let's just lie in the bed a while and watch a movie 11:00 srsfunny:Saturdays With Kids Vs. Without Kids
urine: AN AVERAGE SATURDAY MORNING:
 WITH KIDS VS. WITHOUT KID
 WITH KIDS TIME WITHOUT KIDS
 Time to get up! Someone peed 6:00
 You won't be getting up for 5
 through his diaper and now your
 bed is covered in urine
 more
 You change a diaper and try to
 get the kid to sleep a little longer
 but now the he's yelling zoo
 animals and doing flips on the
 6:30
 You made some breakfast for
 your child, but today he decided
 he hates eggs. He's saying he
 wants "scrims" but you don't
 know what that means. He won't
 explain and just keeps yelling
 "scrims" louder and louder
 7:00
 Your pillow got a little warm so
 you turn it over and go back to
 You've now watched the same
 episode of Spongebob four
 times. One time you tried to
 change it over to the news and
 your kid shoved a spoon in the
 Tranquil visions dance in your
 8:00
 O0
 head as the sweet embrace of
 slumber engulfs your resting
 body
 You attempt to take a shower
 but your kid keeps throwing can
 openers into the tub. You
 weren't aware that you hacd
 multiple can openers
 An angel comes down and
 gently kisses your forehead.
 Sleep well, sweet prince
 8:30
 You walk upstairs to your room,
 but didn't realize your kid was
 using the stairs as a stunt zone
 for Hot Wheels and you slip on
 one and nearly die as you
 tumble back down to the
 A hummingbird perches itself
 outside your window and sings a
 sweet lullaby. He blows you a
 kiss and soars away
 9:00
 You try to finally go to the
 bathroom, but forgot to lock the
 door so now your kid is crying
 because you won't let him dump
 sand in your lap. He dumps it on
 the dog instead. The sand was
 actually used cat litter
 You wake briefly to adjust your
 sleep number. (You bought an
 adjustable bed with all the
 disposable income you have
 from not having a kid.)
 9:30
 You hear laughter, which is
 almost more terrifying than
 crying. You walk in the living
 room to see your kid making 10:00
 S
 Still sleeping soundly, like a
 puppy in front of a crackling
 snow angels in glue. There's no
 way you're getting your deposit
 back with a giant glue angel in
 the middle of the carpet
 Your kid doses off and you try to
 catch up on your favorite show
 You stir a little and check your
 texts. Your friend wants to go to
 brunch later. That sounds nice
 30 more minutes of sleep and
 you'll get ready for that. Maybe
 go to mall later or ride go-karts
 Unfortunately, six minutes into it 10:30
 there's a dramatic moment
 where the music builds and your
 kid is now wide-awake. (Screw
 You get everyone loaded into
 the car to go to the zoo, even
 though it's 90 degrees and so
 humid taxidermy is coming back
 to life. Your kid yells a racial slur
 he heard in a movie. Out of all
 the words he's heard, that's the
 only one that stuck.
 You wake up feeling refreshed
 and beautiful. You know what?
 It's Saturday. Let's just lie in the
 bed a while and watch a movie
 11:00
srsfunny:Saturdays With Kids Vs. Without Kids

srsfunny:Saturdays With Kids Vs. Without Kids

urine: ugly-sugar-fruit siniristiriita Shit my chemistry teacher has said in class, vol, 2 1. "Could you use heart medicine as explosives? Technically, yes." 2. "In theory, the concept that all of you exist is possible. 3. "56 children were born with no arms in France. That is a bit excessive" 4. "Here's an intestine, here's pancreas, over there is a liver and here is a danish pastry" 5. [A lecture on different methods in which bridges were constructed to be blown up during WW1 and wW2] 6. "It's unfortunate if you get an entire ham in your lung." 7. "The good thing about aether is that you don't die." 8. "Let's pick something else that's tasty. Like amphetamine here." 9. "If I tell you that carbon has three bonds, that doesn't mean carbon has three bonds." 10. "There's a french way, german way, american way and russian way. What do we use in Finland then? Depends on who's invading." 11. "The nitrogen makes this one straight." 12. [Walks to the students' side of the classroom] "Hm. Yes. The time does 13. [Lectures on why getting scurvy has made European invaders genocidal 14. "That would be a fun prank: Murder someone by sneaking 20 kilos of 15. [A long explanation of how the introduction of alcohol was an 16. [The story of how the density shifts of water and alcohol led to many 17. "Back then they didn't have any good drugs, so they had to settle for flow slower on this side." on several occasions.] coffee grounds into someone's breakfast porridge. improvement in comparison to drinking psychedelic reindeer urine] murders in the prohibition era moonshine business] aether. A few exploding serfs here and there." teaching them they're second in power from gods. Trust me, they tried." 18. "Nothing good will will come from giving vour children lead poisoning and 19. "My father was born in 1918, so he was 18 in 1936, which was inconvenient at the time." [Our teacher, inexplicably, looks roughly 40-45 and has at least one daughter in her 30s. Nobody fucking knows how old he is, exactly.] Vol. 1 here Source: siniristiriita 50 notes Repost
urine: ugly-sugar-fruit
 siniristiriita
 Shit my chemistry teacher has
 said in class, vol, 2
 1. "Could you use heart medicine as explosives? Technically, yes."
 2. "In theory, the concept that all of you exist is possible.
 3. "56 children were born with no arms in France. That is a bit excessive"
 4. "Here's an intestine, here's pancreas, over there is a liver and here is a
 danish pastry"
 5. [A lecture on different methods in which bridges were constructed to be
 blown up during WW1 and wW2]
 6. "It's unfortunate if you get an entire ham in your lung."
 7. "The good thing about aether is that you don't die."
 8. "Let's pick something else that's tasty. Like amphetamine here."
 9. "If I tell you that carbon has three bonds, that doesn't mean carbon has
 three bonds."
 10. "There's a french way, german way, american way and russian way. What
 do we use in Finland then? Depends on who's invading."
 11. "The nitrogen makes this one straight."
 12. [Walks to the students' side of the classroom] "Hm. Yes. The time does
 13. [Lectures on why getting scurvy has made European invaders genocidal
 14. "That would be a fun prank: Murder someone by sneaking 20 kilos of
 15. [A long explanation of how the introduction of alcohol was an
 16. [The story of how the density shifts of water and alcohol led to many
 17. "Back then they didn't have any good drugs, so they had to settle for
 flow slower on this side."
 on several occasions.]
 coffee grounds into someone's breakfast porridge.
 improvement in comparison to drinking psychedelic reindeer urine]
 murders in the prohibition era moonshine business]
 aether. A few exploding serfs here and there."
 teaching them they're second in power from gods. Trust me, they tried."
 18. "Nothing good will will come from giving vour children lead poisoning and
 19. "My father was born in 1918, so he was 18 in 1936, which was
 inconvenient at the time." [Our teacher, inexplicably, looks roughly 40-45
 and has at least one daughter in her 30s. Nobody fucking knows how old
 he is, exactly.]
 Vol. 1 here
 Source: siniristiriita
 50 notes
Repost

Repost